ArbitraryC posted:

That was my point though, if absolutely everyone were onboard with open stuff I could vaguely see it working, but as long as that's not the case then the people in the position to fully monopolize a single partner, (or sleep around themsevles without their partners sleeping around on them) are going to have a higher status than the people who have to share. I think this is partly why when you look at reddit boards on poly (a gold mine of fantastic e/n style posts) it's always guys that are whining about having trouble coping with their gf sleeping around, there's uneven gender standards there and they subconsciously realize being in this situation devalues them socially. It says that they aren't good enough to be one of the guys who has a dedicated girlfriend.