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Two nights ago I was in New York penn station and I was approached by a kind homeless man named terrence. He sat down next to me while I was waiting for my train due in an hour and we began reminiscing about our youth. He told me about how he smoked all the "kush" and "skunk" and now kids have new names for weed, in the 80's he was caught for crack possession and distribution, now he has 2 felonies. I asked him how he got caught and he told me that the NYPD would pay junkies 40$ to approach dealers and purchase crack cocaine, basically an unavoidable set-up type situation. Well we continued with our heart to heart (apparently in the 80's there was some sort of liquid you snorted to get high, interesting), and terrence is a guy who is into the local synthetic spice/k2/synthetic marijuana scene, ti's all the rage with the homeless population. Anyway we continued to bond and terrence asked me what my sign was. I told him I was a cancer. He was a libra. I was struck by an interesting coincidence. both my mother, and my two ex girlfriends are libras. I told him i just didn't have the heart for women anymore. I just came back from an EDM concert. But I just couldn't get into it. my heart wasn't in the game, i told him. he asked me to follow him. he tried to pick up women in penn station. Now at first glance an eerie crack addict coming up to you may elicit a scowl from random women, but to my surprise terrence had some chutzpah, and the girls into whose ears he leaned into to whisper sweet nothings responded with a shy grin. A few ladies were engaged. Others simply blushed at his compliments. he urged me to try, but I couldn't let out anything more engaging than a : "uhhh...erughhh..you're beautiful, milady" and I gave a short courtsey but most seemed uninterested. I know gbs not the best place to ask but how is it that a 47 year old crack addict knows how to pick up women better than me? what do you say? how do u hold a conversation? do you tell them you like their hair? legs/ tits????????? are you supposed to tell them you want to F*Ck right NOW!!? ? i dont understand.
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Sep 19, 2015 22:06
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| # ? Apr 27, 2024 06:12 |
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Don't be yourself.
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Sep 19, 2015 22:07
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In your case OP I'd try a fork lift.
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Sep 19, 2015 22:08
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Try starting out with lighter weights and work your way up OP, you're just going to get discouraged if you start lifting with weights that you can't do many reps with
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Sep 19, 2015 22:14
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is good thread. thanks, op.
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Sep 19, 2015 22:14
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with your legs so you don't gently caress up your back
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Sep 19, 2015 22:15
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How to pick up girls: Turn 'em over and carry 'em like a bowling ball. But seriously, pay your bum friend a dollar and ask him, cheapass.
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Sep 19, 2015 22:15
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I used one of these To pick up the OP's mom last night. She was hovering right around the weight limit but we managed to get the job done.
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Sep 19, 2015 22:16
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bum said, "hey, this retard needs some encouragement, please smile a bit so he thinks his deviant rear end has some hope so he doesn't put a gun in his mouth"
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Sep 19, 2015 22:17
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try smoking some crack
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Sep 19, 2015 22:23
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Tip your fedora to a girl as a sign of respect so she knows you are a chivalrous gentleman. Then put your PUA skills to work and dominate her mentally. After securing her number, start a thread on a PUA forum to get advice on how to proceed. Before going out on a date, be sure to visit the YLLS subforum here on SA to pick out the perfect pair of skinny jeans. On your date don't forget to walk between her and the street and open doors for her while whispering "m'lady".
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Sep 19, 2015 22:25
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Be your self op. After you've lost 200 pounds and gotten a good job just be yourself
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Sep 19, 2015 22:25
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rims
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Sep 19, 2015 22:29
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Hobohemian posted:Don't be yourself. transform into chad thundercock CHAD FUCKIN THUNDERCOCK MOTHER FUCKER
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Sep 19, 2015 22:35
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I bought him 2 fish filets and a small fry at mcdonalds in thanks for all his help. i felt kinda bad i cut him off before he could say anything about the fries but as i sat on the train i thought "drat he must have wanted a large fries"
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Sep 19, 2015 22:35
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killaer posted:I bought him 2 fish filets and a small fry at mcdonalds in thanks for all his help. i felt kinda bad i cut him off before he could say anything about the fries but as i sat on the train i thought "drat he must have wanted a large fries" you a good man. except for the small fries, but we all make mistakes.
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Sep 19, 2015 22:37
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killaer posted:I bought him 2 fish filets and a small fry at mcdonalds in thanks for all his help. i felt kinda bad i cut him off before he could say anything about the fries but as i sat on the train i thought "drat he must have wanted a large fries" not even a loving meal you jackass
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Sep 19, 2015 22:38
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you could have bought him a burrito you oval office
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Sep 19, 2015 22:38
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Sit at a bar near a woman who has piqued your libido. Stare a little at first but don't make eye contact. Now the ball is in her court.
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Sep 19, 2015 22:44
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notZaar posted:Sit at a bar near a woman who has piqued your libido. Stare a little at first but don't make eye contact. Now the ball is in her court. make sure you passive aggressively sigh really loudly with a frowny face and down your drink before leaving when her boyfriend comes back from the bathroom
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Sep 19, 2015 22:45
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Buying into the idea of "picking up women" is your first step in the wrong direction.
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Sep 19, 2015 22:46
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There's ppl out there that just play the numbers though. You just keep being persistent with a large number of women and statistically you will get a pull every now and then. Doesn't really matter about technique or any of that poo poo, there's just always a percentage of women that will hook up with a person who makes themself available. You just can't be picky or give a poo poo about rejection. Keep your dick wet and your ego up, don't catch an std, and you can plow a certain percentage of any crowd or social scene.
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Sep 19, 2015 23:04
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be a tall handsome dark man. if u are none of those then women arent for you
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Sep 19, 2015 23:07
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don't be Jon Pop
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Sep 19, 2015 23:08
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ClamdestineBoyster posted:There's ppl out there that just play the numbers though. You just keep being persistent with a large number of women and statistically you will get a pull every now and then. Doesn't really matter about technique or any of that poo poo, there's just always a percentage of women that will hook up with a person who makes themself available. You just can't be picky or give a poo poo about rejection. Keep your dick wet and your ego up, don't catch an std, and you can plow a certain percentage of any crowd or social scene. Probably the best advice in the thread. Just go for it, the people who do reject won't even remember you later.
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Sep 19, 2015 23:28
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ClamdestineBoyster posted:There's ppl out there that just play the numbers though. You just keep being persistent with a large number of women and statistically you will get a pull every now and then. Doesn't really matter about technique or any of that poo poo, there's just always a percentage of women that will hook up with a person who makes themself available. You just can't be picky or give a poo poo about rejection. Keep your dick wet and your ego up, don't catch an std, and you can plow a certain percentage of any crowd or social scene. this is great advice if you are an empty shallow human being who has no interest in developing real relationships with other people. instead, you could develop some socially encouraged hobbies like music or cooking or something, and then talk to women like they're normal people and make jokes and be nice to them and talk to them about interesting things. you know, think of them like humans instead of walking vagina holders. when you do that, women tend to want to gently caress you because you're not lovely. and the type of woman who will want to gently caress you will be a lot better than those that gently caress you because you play percentages and numbers and don't really give a poo poo about them. never trust the advice of someone that talks about "pulling" and "keeping your dick wet" unless you also want to also be that sort of person
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Sep 19, 2015 23:49
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Mexican Deathgasm posted:this is great advice if you are an empty shallow human being who has no interest in developing real relationships with other people. There's just people like that though. It doesn't mean they're bad people or you couldn't be their friend. In fact a lot of those people are up front about just wanting to hook up so its easier to just be friendly once you've established the yay or nay so you don't have this emotional basis for friendship that is contingent on sex as the end result of trying to endear oneself and define ones self for the other person.
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Sep 20, 2015 00:04
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Mexican Deathgasm posted:instead, you could develop some socially encouraged hobbies like music or cooking or something, and then talk to women like they're normal people and make jokes and be nice to them and talk to them about interesting things. you know, think of them like humans instead of walking vagina holders. when you do that, women tend to want to gently caress you because you're not lovely. and the type of woman who will want to gently caress you will be a lot better than those that gently caress you because you play percentages and numbers and don't really give a poo poo about them This is great advice, if you're confident enough to talk to women anyway. If not, then just play the loving odds until you've got enough experience to know what the hell you're doing. Then you follow the advice of being a worthwhile person who would be good in a decent relationship. Edit: full confession is that I'm pretty drunk, but also sure that this is good advice.
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Sep 20, 2015 00:05
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Very carefully
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Sep 20, 2015 00:07
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just woo them the same way you wooed gbs- with dead animal pictures.
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Sep 20, 2015 00:08
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Sep 20, 2015 00:11
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Improve your throwing technique and find a good pickup line https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RMKg2zxfTII
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Sep 20, 2015 00:28
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A85cU7hiP5k
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Sep 20, 2015 01:30
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killaer posted:I bought him 2 fish filets and a small fry at mcdonalds in thanks for all his help. i felt kinda bad i cut him off before he could say anything about the fries but as i sat on the train i thought "drat he must have wanted a large fries" wow you moron, all those girls were also homeless and in on the scam. you loving retard jesus, hey man i got some speakers in my van i swear they sent us too many at work so
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Sep 20, 2015 01:46
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Serious Frolicking posted:just woo them the same way you wooed gbs- with dead animal pictures. its not like i personally went into the woods and found cats to strangle jeez dont get your panties in a knot about it. i bet you eat dead animals on the daily!!!
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Sep 20, 2015 02:02
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lift with your knees not your back
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Sep 20, 2015 02:15
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did you try doing a small curtsy op? that's my go to move and i crush
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Sep 20, 2015 02:21
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i'll poop your pants
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Sep 20, 2015 02:25
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just get rich and famous and handsome
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Sep 20, 2015 02:41
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| # ? Apr 27, 2024 06:12 |
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killaer posted:its not like i personally went into the woods and found cats to strangle jeez dont get your panties in a knot about it. i bet you eat dead animals on the daily!!! are you the kitten stamper because ill literally murder you
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Sep 20, 2015 02:43
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