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  • Locked thread
Das Boo
Jun 9, 2011

There was a GHOST here.
It's gone now.

symbolic posted:

1st, then

Sadly, I'm just never gonna be one of the cool gay kids. :(

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Soup du Journey
Mar 20, 2006

by FactsAreUseless

Aralan posted:

Lol, boy do I love concerts

rear end whole!! fine, then you never did the forums thing. i know you did sex witha hot momma

Egoist
Aug 19, 2010

Love myself today
Let you go today
Lipstick Apathy
1. I've traveled from Florida to Michigan in back in the back of a pick up truck
2. I have been hit by a car in NYC
3. My high school freshmen yearbook photo was me in a Naruto jacket and headband

Soup du Journey
Mar 20, 2006

by FactsAreUseless

October Revolution posted:

1. I've traveled from Florida to Michigan in back in the back of a pick up truck
2. I have been hit by a car in NYC
3. My high school freshmen yearbook photo was me in a Naruto jacket and headband
another one bites the dust

Vorik
Mar 27, 2014

- I voted this thread 1
- I voted this thread 5
- I have a really long ballsack

glowstick party tonight
Oct 4, 2003

by zen death robot

Vorik posted:

- I voted this thread 1
- I voted this thread 5
- I have a really long ballsack

you did not vote this thread 5

pics pls

thathonkey
Jul 17, 2012
1. i've never cheated on a girlfriend
2. i've never done IV drugs
3. i have an above avg sized penis

goatse.cx haver
Oct 17, 2010

precious metals
1. i get and stay drunk for month long periods straight sometimes
2. i have never been unemployed for more than a week or so
3. i had a serious relationship with a girl with a rape baby who was diagnosed psychotic and was a homeless junkie for much of her life

Fluo
May 25, 2007

- I use to be in a professional cricket team

- I am related to Jeff Bridges

- I speak 4 languages

Fluo
May 25, 2007

thathonkey posted:

1. i've never cheated on a girlfriend
2. i've never done IV drugs
3. i have an above avg sized penis

3 is a lie

YeahTubaMike
Mar 24, 2005

*hic* Gotta finish thish . . .
Doctor Rope

Tendai posted:

Lies and deceit.

drat, i didn't think i projected the image of someone who doesn't have a toaster through my posts, but you're right

Topographic Nap
Apr 22, 2007

My uncled worked for Nintendo
My aunt worked for Nintendo
My dad worked for Nintendo

thathonkey
Jul 17, 2012

Fluo posted:

3 is a lie

nah it's 2 :smith:

Archer666
Dec 27, 2008

symbolic posted:

#3, you sound like you'd raise your fist to punch her and then collapse in a pool of tears

You're pretty good :ocelot:

Egoist
Aug 19, 2010

Love myself today
Let you go today
Lipstick Apathy

Doctor Schnabel posted:

another one bites the dust

lol I wish

Fluo
May 25, 2007

thathonkey posted:

nah it's 2 :smith:

:(

Inzombiac
Mar 19, 2007

PARTY ALL NIGHT

EAT BRAINS ALL DAY


I'm legendary WWE superstar Kane.

I told a bunch of idiots that a comet would destroy the Earth sometime last week and they believed me.

I suck about 4 dick a day just to prove how not gay I am.

TwoFire
Sep 11, 2001

by Ralp
i hate your life

i hate my life

i hate their lives

Inzombiac
Mar 19, 2007

PARTY ALL NIGHT

EAT BRAINS ALL DAY


I'm like the ultimate grower. Goes from an acorn to something pretty nice. Despite my smallish scrotum, I figure I'm the next big leap in evolution.

I've slept with more women than all of my friends by a significant margin.

I bought my first car and two months later I rolled it down a hill after hitting black ice. I was only going 25 at the time but it was a lovely road.

Edgar
Sep 9, 2005

Oh my heck!
Oh heavens!
Oh my lord!
OH Sweet meats!
Wedge Regret
- One of my relatives was married to a grave robber and was exiled to an island in the great salt lake by Brigham Young

- One of my relatives was the murderer Gary Gilmore and the first person to be executed by firing squad when the death penalty was reinstated in the late 70's.

- One of my relatives captured an lady Indian and made her his wife when he traveled to the promised land here in Utah, so I am part Indian.

Fluo
May 25, 2007

Edgar posted:

- One of my relatives was married to a grave robber and was exiled to an island in the great salt lake by Brigham Young

- One of my relatives was the murderer Gary Gilmore and the first person to be executed by firing squad when the death penalty was reinstated in the late 70's.

- One of my relatives captured an lady Indian and made her his wife when he traveled to the promised land here in Utah, so I am part Indian.

Is number 1 a lie

Methanar
Sep 26, 2013

by the sex ghost
I intentionally bricked a billion dollar industrial mill's servers.

I still have access to a billion dollar industrial mill's servers even though I do not work there anymore and often gently caress around.

I used to drive a construction forklift and destroyed some farmer's pickup truck with it.

TwoFire
Sep 11, 2001

by Ralp

Methanar posted:

I intentionally bricked a billion dollar industrial mill's servers.

I still have access to a billion dollar industrial mill's servers even though I do not work there anymore and often gently caress around.

I used to drive a construction forklift and destroyed some farmer's pickup truck with it.

2016 is the year of bigpeeler

dee eight
Dec 18, 2002

The Spirit
of Maynard

:catdrugs:

Methanar posted:

I intentionally bricked a billion dollar industrial mill's servers.

I still have access to a billion dollar industrial mill's servers even though I do not work there anymore and often gently caress around.

I used to drive a construction forklift and destroyed some farmer's pickup truck with it.

Hoping it's 3 that's the lie.


- I saw Bill Haley and his Comets/Chuck Berry/Bo Didley all live at one concert

-I jumped a Honda 90 fourteen feet into the air

-I cut a cow in half with a chainsaw

TwoFire
Sep 11, 2001

by Ralp

dee eight posted:

Hoping it's 3 that's the lie.


- I saw Bill Haley and his Comets/Chuck Berry/Bo Didley all live at one concert

-I jumped a Honda 90 fourteen feet into the air

-I cut a cow in half with a chainsaw

You are from Montana. I believe all three of these.

The first one, though, only lasted a few seconds while trying to retard the fire, though.

dee eight
Dec 18, 2002

The Spirit
of Maynard

:catdrugs:

TwoFire posted:

You are from Montana. I believe all three of these.

The first one, though, only lasted a few seconds while trying to retard the fire, though.

Nope, the first was in PA and it was 5 bucks for a fuckiing amazing show.

symbolic
Nov 2, 2014

dee eight posted:

Hoping it's 3 that's the lie.


- I saw Bill Haley and his Comets/Chuck Berry/Bo Didley all live at one concert

-I jumped a Honda 90 fourteen feet into the air

-I cut a cow in half with a chainsaw
#3, since #2 is too specific

dee eight
Dec 18, 2002

The Spirit
of Maynard

:catdrugs:

symbolic posted:

#3, since #2 is too specific

Nope, it's #2. I barely cleared 12 feet with the honda

Methanar
Sep 26, 2013

by the sex ghost

dee eight posted:

Hoping it's 3 that's the lie.


- I saw Bill Haley and his Comets/Chuck Berry/Bo Didley all live at one concert

-I jumped a Honda 90 fourteen feet into the air

-I cut a cow in half with a chainsaw

I misread the title, I put two lies and one truth.

3 was true, was the farmer's fault though I got a free day off because of it and that was it.

symbolic
Nov 2, 2014

dee eight posted:

Nope, it's #2. I barely cleared 12 feet with the honda
how does one chop a cow in half with a chainsaw legally unless you work at a processing plant?

dee eight
Dec 18, 2002

The Spirit
of Maynard

:catdrugs:

symbolic posted:

how does one chop a cow in half with a chainsaw legally unless you work at a processing plant?

It's easy. First you get a cow...

TwoFire
Sep 11, 2001

by Ralp

dee eight posted:

Nope, the first was in PA and it was 5 bucks for a fuckiing amazing show.

Goddammit.

circ dick soleil
Sep 27, 2012

by zen death robot
im gay

im gay

im not gay

Khazar-khum
Oct 22, 2008

:minnie: Cat Army :minnie:
2nd Battalion
1. I grew up in a haunted house.

2. I was in a porno.

3. I accidentally shot my sister with an arrow.

The Whole Internet
May 26, 2010

by FactsAreUseless
as a kid, i used to watch aerobics movies. i didn't work out while i was watching them, i just sat there looking at them. it wasn't a sexual thing either. i just enjoyed the rhythm.

i can fit the head of a vortex football completely up my rear end.

for a few years, i became obsessed with an ex-friend who i had become enemies with, and i spent a lot of time stalking him. i joined every forum he posted on under different usernames and integrated myself in those communities, and on all of them i knew who he was but he doesn't know who i was.

TwoFire
Sep 11, 2001

by Ralp

The Whole Internet posted:

as a kid, i used to watch aerobics movies. i didn't work out while i was watching them, i just sat there looking at them. it wasn't a sexual thing either. i just enjoyed the rhythm.

i can fit the head of a vortex football completely up my rear end.

for a few years, i became obsessed with an ex-friend who i had become enemies with, and i spent a lot of time stalking him. i joined every forum he posted on under different usernames and integrated myself in those communities, and on all of them i knew who he was but he doesn't know who i was.

Hi Sheila

Dopilsya
Apr 3, 2010
I once eliminated roughly 13 million untermenschen in order to create living space for my people.

I wrote and directed a porn parody of the documentary "King: A Filmed Record..Montgomery to Memphis". It was titled "Whitey's on the Poon".

I've never once made a good post.

Nooner
Mar 26, 2011

AN A+ OPSTER (:
Second cutest poster ever
Didn't do 9/11
Owns the ultimate driving machine

Fluo
May 25, 2007

Nooner posted:

Second cutest poster ever
Didn't do 9/11
Owns the ultimate driving machine

1 is a lie

you're the #1 cutest poster ever

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DaemonWyrm
Jul 3, 2003

Why don't I hear any sleep screams?

Khazar-khum posted:

1. I grew up in a haunted house.

2. I was in a porno.

3. I accidentally shot my sister with an arrow.

Lemme guess, it wasn't an accident.

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