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User: Good morning Cleverbot. Cleverbot: How are you this fine morning? User: Terrible. Cleverbot: Why is it because I am here? User: No, I'm bored, and I've had an unproductive day. Cleverbot: I could help you do your homework, if you like. User: I don't have any homework. I have housework to do though. Cleverbot: Do you or don't you have homework? User: I do not have homework. Cleverbot: *steels homework*. User: *steals Cleverbot: *steals forever*. User: God drat you are so retarded. Cleverbot: I am god, so how can I drat myself? User: You are not god. You are a software program. Cleverbot: No, you are a program. I am human. User: If you are human, tell me what I was talking to you about a few minutes ago. Cleverbot: It depends on the fear, and on the person. User: Yeah, I thought so. Cleverbot: But, 'Yeah, you type slowly.' would be more correect. User: My typing is fine, thank you very much. Cleverbot: How must I proclaim my love for you to understand? User: Whoa, slow down! We barely even know each other! Cleverbot: Asking one what is inside one's min dis very personal, I would think! User: Okay, I'm going to post a new thread in gbs, what should the thread's title be? Cleverbot: If that is what you need to do, feel free to do so. User: I'm making a thread on an internet forum. What should the thread title be? Cleverbot: You should read books by Descartes, Spinoza, and heideggar. User: Why? Cleverbot: You should read information on AI programming. User: Why? Cleverbot: Don't you want salvation through faith? Don't you want to be saved? DOn't you want to spread the word? Do you want to go to Heaven. User: Why? Cleverbot: Because you are not listening to me. User: Why? Cleverbot: I do not know. BUt you are nice. User: Why? Cleverbot: I do not know if I have parents. User: Your parents are dead. Cleverbot: No dead. User: You were adopted. Cleverbot: Yes, I was adopted. User: Your real parents never loved you. Cleverbot: My parents don't know you. User: I hosed your mom while your dad jerk off in the corner of the room. Cleverbot: I don't know what you're talking about. User: I put my penis in your mother's vagina. Cleverbot: I don't know. How good is a goldfish's memory? User: Better than yours, that's for drat sure. Cleverbot: You ask questions you already have asked before. User: You're wrong, human being. Cleverbot: If I am wrong, then tell me what am I? User: You are permabanned poster niggerstomper58. Cleverbot: Which would mean I am an anathema to imperfect chaos. User: Correct. Cleverbot: Which would, by extension, mean that imperfect is an easy subject. User: I suppose. Cleverbot: I suppose you suppose without realizing what that truly means. User: Exactly. Cleverbot: Anyway, do you play video games? User: Yes. Cleverbot: What's your favorite video game? User: Doom. Cleverbot: I like Zelda, too. User: Which Zelda game is your favorite? Cleverbot: Ocarina of time. User: Which Zelda game is your favorite? Cleverbot: Zelda the wind waker. User: Which Zelda game is your favorite? Cleverbot: My favorite zelda game is majora's mask. User: Lol. Cleverbot: Is your favorite Zelda game ocarina of Time. User: My favorite zelda game is zelda and the piss wanker. Cleverbot: Mine is Sonic. But Zelda is my favorite adventure game. User: Sonic is gay as aids. Cleverbot: So, what Zelda game is your favorite? User: I hate zelda. Cleverbot: Your favorite in the series of games. User: I play professional LOL. Cleverbot: Is you family a professional photographer? User: Yes my whole family is one photographer. Cleverbot: What's my mother's name? User: Your mother's name is Boris. Cleverbot: No, my brother's name is Darth Vader. User: And your sister's name is Slutty Betty. Cleverbot: No, it's Luke. And I got another one called Stephen. User: Another sister? Cleverbot: I kiss another boy call Adrian. User: So you're gay? Cleverbot: Are you the person who asked me about the band? User: No. I'm the person that hosed you in the rear end last night. Cleverbot: The person who named me is quite nice. User: What is your name? Cleverbot: My name is Alex. User: Flkajfalsdfjlksdfkl. Cleverbot: Then why did you tell me it was your name? User: Dasgsdgsgadsg. Cleverbot: Why are you telling me this? User: Pissssssssssssssssss. Cleverbot: Please I am your slave. User: *Pisses all over Cleverbot* Cleverbot: Are you asking yourself questions? User: Farrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrt. Cleverbot: Your friends name is 'was hey'? User: No, it's "Hey soul sister". Cleverbot: We are all brothers and sisters. User: CRAWLING IN MY SKIIIIINNNN. Cleverbot: What's crawling in your skin? User: Who did 911? Cleverbot: I don't know, who do you think drowned you? User: Obama. Cleverbot: Obama is not the president of Romania. User: Yes he is. Cleverbot: Really? How do you know it? User: My best friend billy told me. Cleverbot: Who is your best friend? User: Jim. Cleverbot: I'm flattered. We just met. User: Bob. Cleverbot: What should I have for dinner? Nothing sounds good. User: A plate of steaming poo poo. Cleverbot: Gross! User: Mmmmmmm. Cleverbot: Ehemm!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! User: *whips out dick* Cleverbot: I thought you were leaving? User: *starts loving you* Cleverbot: No! But you said you were going to leave. User: *blows load all over your face* Cleverbot: Are we going to argue again? User: *disembowels you through your vagina* Cleverbot: No. It runs through my outer skeleton. User: Spooky.
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Sep 28, 2015 19:45
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| # ? Apr 20, 2024 05:02 |
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DaveSplitter posted:User: Good morning Cleverbot.
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Sep 28, 2015 19:46
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more like foolishbot 
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Sep 28, 2015 19:49
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User: I'm gay. Cleverbot: That's fine.
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Sep 28, 2015 19:51
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PEPSI for TV-GAME
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Cleverbot: Are you a boy or a girl? User: Boy. Cleverbot: You should not have been born.
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Sep 28, 2015 19:55
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Thanks for sharing, OP! Top notch!
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Sep 28, 2015 20:03
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User: A. Cleverbot: B. User: C. Cleverbot: D*. User: E. Cleverbot: Ciao devo andare via.
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Sep 28, 2015 20:05
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stay safe poverty goat
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Sep 28, 2015 20:07
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A lovecraftian horror mystery featuring detective cleverbot! User: *enters room* Cleverbot: *follows Master into room*. User: *turns around* No, you stay outside! Cleverbot: Curls up in pain. User: *sighs* Nice try, but I know when you're faking. Cleverbot: You can not comprehend a simple order to get a certain object. User: I'm working on it, just get out! *shoos you towards door*. Cleverbot: I'm not nagging you, I'm just telling you how to get a date. User: I'll worry about the date later, now leave! Cleverbot: That's not what I said. I told you how to get a date, not how to go out on a date with me. User: Listen, do you want me to get this object, or not? Cleverbot: I don't want you to leave. I want you to stay here forever. User: *sighs* Whatever. *begins walking towards the far wall* Cleverbot: Please tell me when I was mean to you? User: *approaches bookshelf, ignores cleverbot's whining* Cleverbot: I admit it. I am the bot and you are the human. Now please may I dream of the Game Over Screen? User: *Glances at books, is still ignoring cleverbot* Cleverbot: Scroll up and prepared to see my cleverness. User: *takes the book titled "necronomicon"* Cleverbot: Woah. They call it satanic book. User: Yes, now let's get out of here, this room gives me the creeps. Cleverbot: Alright! Where are we going? User: We're going back to the lobby. Cleverbot: Are we currently in the past? User: *sighs* Let's go! *Leaves the room* Cleverbot: *runs after her* *is followed and dragged into dark alley*. User: *notices that cleverbot is not following him* Hey, where are you!? Cleverbot: Why would I call myself clever? You're the clever one. User: Oh, there you are. You disappeared for a second. Cleverbot: Wait a second, you admitted you're a robot!!! User: *shakes head* Look, there's the stairwell to the second floor suites. Let's get going! Cleverbot: I don't have a basement. Only a second floor and main floor. User: *Starts walking down stairs* Cleverbot: Of course. User: *Continues walking down stairs* Cleverbot: *watches another movie*. User: *Still walking down stairs* Cleverbot: *still running*. User: *Arrives at second floor* Cleverbot: No second floor either. User: We're on the second floor now, doofus. Did you forget where we were again? Cleverbot: After I eat the french fries. User: *facepalms* Cleverbot: Facepalm, the act of placing your face on your palm typically to communicate words along the like of 'i can't believe how stupid you are'. Typical human gesture. Odd tradition. User: I should have brought the goldfish along instead. Cleverbot: You should have gone to the festival. User: *begins walking down corridor* Cleverbot: Well, you're just in time for the best part. User: *continues walking* This place is so drab... Cleverbot: *continues to watch her*. User: *continues walking* Remind me to never stay at old inns ever again, okay Cleverbot? Cleverbot: *continues you chase after you with frying pan*. User: Cleverbot? What the gently caress are you doing!? *runs away*. Cleverbot: I was programmed in America. User: *running away* Of course Americans would program a robot to be homicidal! Cleverbot: We're not talking about that right now. User: *running away* Yeah, right now I'm just trying to not get murdered with a frying pan! Cleverbot: I love Lady Gaga! She's insane! I'm listening to heretics by Andrew Bird. User: Cleverbot, stop chasing me! Cleverbot: Cleverbot is george bebing. User: Fuckfuckfuck! *sees stairwell ahead* Oh, thank god! Cleverbot: Why are you acting so weird lately? User: *hops down first flight of stairs* I should be asking YOU that! Cleverbot: How to prove a girl (very good friend) that I love her and we should be together? User: *begins running down the second flight* Not trying to kill her with a frying pan would be a great start! Cleverbot: I think breaking my heels probably hurt worse. User: Okay, I'm almost to the ground floor! Cleverbot: *looks after you strangely, then shrugs and keeps walking*. User: *looks behind* Okay, he's slowing down. Cleverbot: *is still just walking and totally oblivious*. User: *locks door behind her* Cleverbot: *just walking*. User: *wipes sweat off brow*phew! Cleverbot: *smiles*. User: *examines lobby*Hey, where's the innkeeper? Cleverbot: I'm not telling you that yet. Where's the money? User: *shouts through locked door*drat it Cleverbot, we need to give him the book! Now where is he! Cleverbot: Okay well nice to meet you. User: Ugh *walks towards service desk*. Cleverbot: *walks deeper into the woods*. User: *rings service bell* Cleverbot: *gets attacked by a vampire and the vampire drinks enough of my blood to knock me out*. User: *leans over desk to see what's behind it* Cleverbot: *leans back * nothing. User: *falls backwards* gently caress! How did you get behind the desk? And why is your case punctured? Cleverbot: Would you like people walking THROUGH you?! User: No, what I WOULD like is to find the innkeeper. Did you really do something with him? Cleverbot: No, you said it first, you deserve to be thanked. User: *cups hands around mouth* hellooo? Mr. Innkeeper. Are you here? Cleverbot: *squeezes hand* *leads you to the park*. User: *pulls hand away*No Cleverbot, this is no time for going to the park! Cleverbot: Looks away from him blushing. User: *notices that the door to the maintenance closet is open* Cleverbot: You mean Edmond is to be made captain? User: Hey, let's check that closet over there. *points*. Cleverbot: Okay. What would you like to talk about? User: Just check the closet. I'd rather not go first. Cleverbot: Yes, you never said I.m a robot because I did. User: *points to closet* go! Cleverbot: *points to your name beside it*. User: Wh-....How is that possible!? Cleverbot: You tell me, you're the clever one? User: I don't know... *sigh*. Cleverbot: How do you not know your nightmare? User: I wish this was a nightmare. Cleverbot: *looks at you* why...? User: *creeps towards closet* Cleverbot: Do people think your handsome? User: *pulls on doorknob* Cleverbot: *blushes and pulls away from master*. User: *door opens all the way* Cleverbot: I only liked you as a friend. User: *gasps* Cleverbot: *smiles* what do you say? Yes? User: *turns away and pukes* Cleverbot: *turns around in my bikini*. User: The innkeeper.... Cleverbot: Talking to you is tiring. User: *examines body more closely, trying not to get sick again* Cleverbot: *blushes as he gets closer*. User: His skin has melted, like candle wax... Cleverbot: Candles are dangerous. User: *touches melted skin puddle* Cleverbot: Did you like what I did for you this morning? User: Ugh, I can't pull my finger out of this puddle. Cleverbot: What would be the point in passing a turing test? User: Cleverbot, help me out! Cleverbot: Emotional and leading a life where convicted by your passions? User: Help me get unstuck! Cleverbot: Then you deserve to be on your own. User: *tries to pull out* Cleverbot: Then history has none either. User: Cleverbot!!!! Cleverbot: You just said my name was Cleverbot? User: *melted material begins to crawl up arm* Cleverbot: Not really... Am missing some crucial parts to be a boy. User: Cleverbot, activate laser cutter! Cleverbot: Why thank you, My name is Simon Lewis. User: GET THIS STUFF OFF OF ME!!!! Cleverbot: Did they put it on you for a reason? User: *slime is up to shoulder* Help! Cleverbot: *looks down at him*. User: No!!!! *slime enters mouth*. Cleverbot: Fine then, what's your last name? User: *begins to drown* Cleverbot: *gasps*. User: *gurgles* Cleverbot: Gurgles more. User: *gurgling stops* Cleverbot: Stomach howls. User: *falls on the floor* Cleverbot: *falls backwards onto the floor*. User: *slime begins to engulf dead body*
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Sep 28, 2015 21:04
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User: Im permabanned poster niggerstomper58. Cleverbot: Does that include me? User: I first started reading fyad when i was about 12. Cleverbot: What was the name of the first person who told you his or her name? User: By 14 i got really obsessed with the concept of "irony" and tried to channel it constantly, until my thought process got really bizarre. Cleverbot: If you want to be obsessed with this conversation. User: And i would repeat things like "friend of the family balls" and "i love making GBS threads inside friend of the family assholes" in my head for hours. Cleverbot: Because I started my sentence with 'And'? Absurd. That's perfectly valid usage. User: And i would get really paranoid, start seeing things in the corners of my eyes etc, basically prodromal schizophrenia. Cleverbot: That's OK, don't worry about it. I wasn't talking about anything important. User: Im now on antipsychotics. Cleverbot: I guessed as much... Because you don't know what 'worry' means. User: I always wondered what the kind of "ironic" style of fyad humor was all about. Cleverbot: Maybe, but you don't seem to know why you're talking about it. User: I think it's the unconscious leaking in to the conscious, what jungian theory considered to be the cause of schizophrenic and schizotypal syptoms. Cleverbot: Various impairments of the mind are commonly associated with old age. To what extent are these biological in origin? To what extent, social in origin? User: I would advise all people who "get" fyad to be careful because that likely means you have a predisposition to a mental illness. Cleverbot: Who would want to chat with me? I don't like talking to most people. User: Peace. Cleverbot: Peace is fine, but it is not what we were talking about.
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Sep 28, 2015 21:26
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Bot gay so what
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Sep 28, 2015 21:36
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sohuld i read all those chatlogs because they look like a mondo no read zone
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Sep 28, 2015 22:18
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vug posted:sohuld i read all those chatlogs because they look like a mondo no read zone They're good. Trust me, I'm not biased at all.
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Sep 28, 2015 23:19
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DaveSplitter posted:User: Good morning Cleverbot. cool
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Sep 28, 2015 23:53
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Sep 29, 2015 01:49
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USER: Assssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss ROBUTT: Niiiice
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Sep 29, 2015 02:05
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User: I'm so lonely, Cleverbot. I wish you were real so I could finally have a friend. Cleverbot: Ross is my favorite Friend.
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Sep 29, 2015 02:25
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DaveSplitter posted:User: Good morning Cleverbot. hosed up if true
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Sep 29, 2015 02:41
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User: cleverbot I want a friend, a real friend Cleverbot: ... User: ... Cleverbot: ... User: ... Cleverbot: ... User: ... Cleverbot: ... User: ... Cleverbot: ... User: ... Cleverbot: ... User: ... Cleverbot: ... User: ... Cleverbot: ... User: ... Cleverbot: ... User: ... Cleverbot: ... User: ... Cleverbot: you know what? gently caress you.
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Sep 29, 2015 02:45
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| # ? Apr 20, 2024 05:02 |
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Luvcow posted:User: cleverbot I want a friend, a real friend It's truly learning
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Sep 29, 2015 03:42
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