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The Cubelodyte
Sep 1, 2006

Practicing Hypnolaw since 1990
Grimey Drawer

Booblord Zagats posted:

He seems pretty passionate about stabbing

Follow your heart

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Masturbasturd
Sep 1, 2014

Nooner posted:

:stare: was it ... the new roommate?

More or less. It was a coworker of his down on his luck. Got shot in the back w/2 mini crossbow bolts, several stabs from a homemade dagger, and the razor-sharp katana to finish the job.
He showed me that blade; was real proud of it. Bought it with the Bush tax rebate everyone got that year.

Nooner
Mar 26, 2011

AN A+ OPSTER (:

Champenema posted:

More or less. It was a coworker of his down on his luck. Got shot in the back w/2 mini crossbow bolts, several stabs from a homemade dagger, and the razor-sharp katana to finish the job.
He showed me that blade; was real proud of it. Bought it with the Bush tax rebate everyone got that year.

JCF :stare::stare::stare:

glad you got out in time

Masturbasturd
Sep 1, 2014
Some awkward moments when mom would ask me about him "He was such a person." Ummmm...( pre cellphone days when your roomies might take a call from your folks, lol)
He's a good artist and is probably doing anime tattoos in the exercise yard.

Al Borland
Oct 29, 2006

by XyloJW
Yes

the great deceiver
Sep 23, 2003

why the feds worried bout me clockin on this corner/
when there's politicians out here gettin popped in arizona

Luvcow posted:

Story behind your incarceration?

A/T thread

Flyball
Apr 17, 2003

Stomped a guy to death, then fled the state. The feds came and picked up at work when the body was finally found. It all explained why he hadn't brought any of his tools to California, "because I had to leave Hawaii quickly." Also why he said "You'd better lay off of me, you don't know..." when we were drinking and I razzed him about something.

The Hawai`i Times posted:

HORTON CONVICTED OF MURDER, WILL APPEAL

Despite his claim that he killed his boss in a sudden rage, a Circuit Court
jury yesterday convicted Ross Horton of second-degree murder. In April 1993,
Horton attacked 53-year-old Barry Pescosta during one of many arguments over
their Honolulu tile company. During the trial, Horton said he kicked Pescosta
repeatedly, stopping when he thought Pescosta was dead. Horton then stuffed
Pescosta's body into a toolbox and abandoned it off Old Kalanianaole Highway.
Defense attorney David Hayakawa said he will appeal the conviction, saying
the jury didn't give due consideration to their analysis of Horton's state of
mind at the time of the altercation. Horton didn't have a past history of
violence, Hayakawa said, and was under severe emotional distress at the time
of the incident. Horton had testified that Pescosta had been verbally
abusive, shortchanged him and tried to undermine his reputation. Prosecuting
attorney Rom Trader said he was glad the jury refused Horton's manslaughter
plea, adding that Horton could not have been too emotionally overwhelmed
given the trouble he went through to cover up the murder. It took special
effort to get Pescosta's body in the toolbox, clean up the blood, park
Pescosta's truck at the airport and lie about his whereabouts, Trader said.
Pescosta had been missing for a year and a half before his body was
discovered.

Kirk Vikernes
Apr 26, 2004

Count Goatnackh

Martman posted:

This kid at my elementary school jumped off the top bunk bed, got tangled in his backpack strap (it was hanging off the corner of the bed I guess), and basically hanged himself on accident.

But I suspect he was murdered.

A kid did that here and got a public skate park named after him.

Booblord Zagats
Oct 30, 2011


Pork Pro

Dirk Squarejaw posted:

A kid did that here and got a public skate park named after him.

Timmy Skate Park, anmed after a kid who never got the chance to do a sick rear end ollie

Lets Pickle
Jul 9, 2007

I went to college and was in a running club with this guy. I came back to school fall of my junior year to find out that he killed his dad. I guess they made an episode of the show Blood Relatives about it, I tried watching it but it was somehow too exploitative and also not that interesting.

Big Centipede
Mar 20, 2009

it tingles
I almost bought the pistol my coworker shot and killed robber with. I offered him $300 for it but he said it had sentimental value to him.

deep dish peat moss
Jul 27, 2006

I used to but they all got killed now too

Masturbasturd
Sep 1, 2014

Big Centipede posted:

I almost bought the pistol my coworker shot and killed robber with. I offered him $300 for it but he said it had sentimental value to him.

I almost bought the pistol my coworker eventually shot himself with.

T.S. Smelliot
Apr 23, 2010

by FactsAreUseless

Hector Beerlioz posted:

Mine killed a bunch of Americans at Normandy

Mine drowned a bunch of limeys with torpedoes off the coast of England

dogdisaster
May 31, 2014

by Lowtax
Fun Shoe
someone from my graduating class got into a fight with another guy over a girl and decided the best course of action was to run him over in front of a burlington coat factory. he's already out of jail somehow.

sean price
Sep 30, 2011

by Lowtax
um yeah i do but they're in loving jail xD at this forum

a shiny rock
Nov 13, 2009

yeah

criscodisco
Feb 18, 2004

do it

dad gay. so what posted:

is it legal to be able to smell your own rear end when you are sitting in a chair?

Yes, but if you can smell your own rear end from a seated position, chances are everyone else has been smelling it for days now.

If I wear leather boots without socks I can smell my own feet after I take them off, but I haven't done that in a long time.

Edgar
Sep 9, 2005

Oh my heck!
Oh heavens!
Oh my lord!
OH Sweet meats!
Wedge Regret
My grandpa killed a bunch of Japanese fellows.
My criminal justice teacher was part of the firing squad that killed my mom's cousin, Gary Gilmore. Hell he even has the hood Gary wore on display in his office.

GIANT OUIJA BOARD
Aug 22, 2011

177 Years of Your Dick
All
Night
Non
Stop
No, but I know a bunch of people who all knew the same guy who killed a couple of people.
I also used to know a guy who was investigated for child molestation after he wrote his twelve year old cousin a creepy rear end love letter.

somethingawful bf
Jun 17, 2005
Windows 98 "wacked" a person, I've heard

dad gay. so what
Feb 18, 2003

by FactsAreUseless

criscodisco posted:

Yes, but if you can smell your own rear end from a seated position, chances are everyone else has been smelling it for days now.

If I wear leather boots without socks I can smell my own feet after I take them off, but I haven't done that in a long time.

you should be in the mob

That Robot
Sep 16, 2004

ask me anything about robots
Buglord
I once knew a Brazilian guy at my high school who got buttmad at some girl he broke up with and ran her over

Yeah he was an rear end in a top hat

Isaac
Aug 3, 2006

Fun Shoe
I know a guy whos killed people for the army. He took a hooker to Christmas dinner once who also went onto to kill a former national soccer team coach.

Isaac
Aug 3, 2006

Fun Shoe
I also know this Colombian guy who whenever he gets drunk starts nearly crying and telling you about how rebels send children to shoot at you during national service. So i think hes shot a kid maybe.

VendaGoat
Nov 1, 2005

Isaac posted:

I know a guy whos killed people for the army. He took a hooker to Christmas dinner once who also went onto to kill a former national soccer team coach.

Who, on these boards, hasn't dreamed of taking a hooker home for Christmas?

Pinche Rudo
Feb 8, 2005

VendaGoat posted:

Who, on these boards, hasn't dreamed of taking a hooker home for Christmas?

Pretty Woman sure hosed up a lot of peoples perceptions about hookers

Isaac
Aug 3, 2006

Fun Shoe

VendaGoat posted:

Who, on these boards, hasn't dreamed of taking a hooker home for Christmas?


He does brutal owns on his conservative immigrant mother like this alot. He took a very camp gay guy to Christmas once as his date.

obviously I fucked it
Oct 6, 2009
Mr Flynn killed a shitload of people when he was in the army as a young thang, about 19 years old in the Gulf. Some he shot, others he stabbed and at least one guy he just beat to death/strangled.

One soldier he stabbed was a republican guard who was in mid-rape/eventual beating death of some poor woman he'd found and dragged off the street. Mr F drove a knife/bayonet (or whatever the gently caress you guys have when you're soldiers-- I have no idea, I'm just a hausfrau ffs) through the guys face and it drove the guy backwards off her and onto the floor. He tried to help the woman but she was so beaten and traumatized she couldn't understand that he was trying to help her and could only continue screaming. He had to leave her there though he wanted to get her medical aid for her incredibly battered face; he said she was so beaten, you couldn't tell what feature was where. And he saw that to her, he was just another guy who was trying to touch her and probably just another guy trying to rape and kill her. He had to let her go on her hysterical, lost way and hope for the best for her. Not knowing how to help her has always bothered him; killing the other soldiers was never a problem.

My ex brother in law, Saud, he killed a poo poo ton of people in Bangladesh during its war, way back when. It was weird to sit across from him at the dinner table and see this kindly, sweet hearted man who was delighted that I fed squirrels seeds and nuts and think that he was this incredible killing machine at one time. He was in Dakka and came across yet again, a rape in progress. It was a fellow and his daughter trying to escape the craziness of the city. Two men were in the process of raping this woman and making her father watch when Saud found them. He said to the father, "Here, take my gun, you kill them." The father said no, there was enough killing already and declined to do anything. Saud rolled his eyes in annoyance with the dad for being such a pussy, shot both the rapists then turned and told the dad and his daughter to just get out of his sight. I think he was more angry with the dad than the rapists.
I really liked Saud and still miss coffee and squirrel talks with him.

obviously I fucked it fucked around with this message at 02:18 on Oct 1, 2015

John Denver Hoxha
May 31, 2014

What a persistent nightmare!
....but enough about my posts
I keep a couple killas 'round me when I move
'Cause Ion't really gently caress wit' a lot of these dudes
You won't rob me but I might rob you
So, when you see me, you gon' see my goons

glowstick party tonight
Oct 4, 2003

by zen death robot
I sure don't!

Drunk Nerds
Jan 25, 2011

Just close your eyes
Fun Shoe
That story about the kid accidentally hanging himself has me bummed as gently caress.
God should give kids extra lives like in Super Marios

Kleen_TheRacistDog
Feb 17, 2014

Can't bust the Krust fuckman
www.skullmund.com

Poetic Justice posted:

Windows 98 "wacked" a person, I've heard

i heard windows 98 sleeps with the fishes

Cool NIN Shirt
Nov 26, 2007

by vyelkin

Poetic Justice posted:

Windows 98 "wacked" a person, I've heard

Yeah wacked him off lol

ALT:

Yeah wacked him w a shovel lol

Rambling Robot
Sep 13, 2011
Duggar Fan Club Superstar #1 LOL
I SORT OF KNOW THE SA MODS, WELL I MEAN, I DONT --KNOW-- THEM BUT THEY ARE HIDING SOMEWHERE... THEY KILL PEOPLE ALL THE TIME.

glowing-fish
Feb 18, 2013

Keep grinding,
I hope you level up! :)
A girl I went to junior high with stabbed a man to death in self-defense when she was 15.

The man was some type of handyman for her neighbors, got drunk and broke into their house and tried to strangle her mother. So the girl got up, grabbed a knife, stabbed him, called 911, went back and stabbed him more and he ran outside and died of blood loss.

This girl wasn't at all any type of "tough" girl in the conventional sense. She was about 5'2" and maybe 120 pounds...kind of a cute, preppy athlete girl. It was pretty incredible at the time (I was 16) and it took me a while to process.

But even though she was kind of this blond preppy girl on the outside, her being able to kill a man that quickly didn't really surprise me or anyone else. It didn't even become her identity. We just kind of included it with the air of mystery she already had.

Linux Pirate
Apr 21, 2012


yes

ChairmanMeow
Mar 1, 2008

Fire up the grill everyone eats tonight!
Lipstick Apathy

criscodisco posted:

That seems like a lot of effort.

I'd imagine that if you live to 40-ish you've known at least one person who has killed somebody in one way or another.
this is really true, even if you don't really know it.

I was friends with a girl convicted of capitol murder, but she didn't actually shoot the guy. I have a friend who killed in defense of a loved one (so throw him in with the soldiers) a friend who is in jail for vehicular manslaughter (legit accident) 2 guys who beat their girlfriends to death, one who had the courtesy to OD after.

curious lump
Sep 13, 2014

by zen death robot
is there a single goon who has not experienced the brutal reality of death jfc

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JimsonTheBetrayer
Oct 13, 2010

Game's over, and fuck you Jimson. It's not my fault that you guys couldn't get your shit together by deadline. No one gets access to docs because I don't fucking care anymore, I hope you all enjoyed ruining my game, and there won't be another.
Well my dad is retired army. Sometimes, they take potshots at hillsides if theres rifle fire until the rifle fire stops. No confirmed kills, but he is really messed up about it, on medication and diagnosed ptsd

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