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I heard a weird noise coming from the kitchen that sounded likE a marble dropping, but I don't own any marbles. I'm too afraid to go out and check; there's probably some sort of thug out there. I've decided to play it safe and lock myself in my room.
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Oct 12, 2015 12:36
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| # ? Apr 26, 2024 19:16 |
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Stay safe DaveSplitter Ghost.
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Oct 12, 2015 12:37
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Where do you keep the money?
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Oct 12, 2015 12:37
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Al Borland posted:Where do you keep the money? I keep it in a ceramic piggybank labeled "DaveSplitter's Life Savings". I keep it in the kitchen. Shod I be worried?
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Oct 12, 2015 12:44
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Do you have any hanzo steel with which you can ward off an intruder?
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Oct 12, 2015 12:44
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i assume you already retrieved your weapons and ammo from their respective safes????? remember your trigger discipline, have fun!
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Oct 12, 2015 12:44
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DaveSplitter posted:I keep it in a ceramic piggybank labeled "DaveSplitter's Life Savings". I keep it in the kitchen. Shod I be worried? IS that all you have?
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Oct 12, 2015 12:45
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DaveSplitter posted:I heard a weird noise coming from the kitchen that sounded likE a marble dropping, but I don't own any marbles. I'm too afraid to go out and check; there's probably some sort of thug out there. I've decided to play it safe and lock myself in my room. Now's your chance to serve society by removing a burglar from the gene pool. Kill that guy with your gun/rifle. Nothing of value will be lost
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Oct 12, 2015 12:45
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get naked and masturbate all over yourself, then rush the attacker
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Oct 12, 2015 12:46
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Where do you keep the rest of your valuables? Dave.
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Oct 12, 2015 12:53
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Drop it!
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Oct 12, 2015 13:09
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Prepare your anus OP
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Oct 12, 2015 13:11
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I don't own any real guns, the closest thing I have is a double-barreled nerf gun. Do you think that maybe I can cock it loud enough to scare the intruder away?
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Oct 12, 2015 13:13
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just find the heaviest object you can and charge into the room swinging wildly, this is a foolproof plan i can assure you
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Oct 12, 2015 13:15
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the intruder probably left by now anyway, go ahead
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Oct 12, 2015 13:16
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unsheathe your katana
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Oct 12, 2015 13:20
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it's me, op. I just wanted to drop in and say hi
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Oct 12, 2015 13:21
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DaveSplitter posted:I don't own any real guns, the closest thing I have is a double-barreled nerf gun. Do you think that maybe I can cock it loud enough to scare the intruder away? No your home sucks. I'm gone already get some money rear end in a top hat.
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Oct 12, 2015 13:23
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Use black makeup to put battle stripes on your naked form, then douse your erection in lighter fluid and ignite it. That will be enough to startle the intruder and he will scurry into the darkness or shoot you in the chest.
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Oct 12, 2015 13:23
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its probably somebody making ice
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Oct 12, 2015 13:24
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It's not "your" home. Property rights are a artificial human creation that we have no reason to respect. If the intruder wants to live with you there's nothing you can do to stop him.
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Oct 12, 2015 13:26
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kikkelivelho posted:It's not "your" home. Property rights are a artificial human creation that we have no reason to respect. perhaps with time they can learn to love one another
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Oct 12, 2015 13:27
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Are you alive OP? Keep us updated.
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Oct 12, 2015 13:44
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various cheeses posted:Are you alive OP? Keep us updated. I assume he died after slipping on the marble that the intruder dropped on the floor.
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Oct 12, 2015 13:57
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pigeonchest bill posted:I assume he died after slipping on the marble that the intruder dropped on the floor. the perfect crim,
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Oct 12, 2015 14:00
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"accidentally" get caught, offer to suck their dick in exchange for your safety
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Oct 12, 2015 14:48
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pigeonchest bill posted:I assume he died after slipping on the marble that the intruder dropped on the floor. the perp is alleged to be a strung out child movie star who's out despite numerous charges of assault / attempted murder with household items
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Oct 12, 2015 14:58
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kikkelivelho posted:It's not "your" home. Property rights are a artificial human creation that we have no reason to respect. Robo Reagan posted:perhaps with time they can learn to love one another Then tell people you met on eharmony. There you go, modern marriage acquired. Or, like every other goon you can rush to your vaulted safe-room, acquire your tactical assault rifle with MVC4321 optical sights, Weatherston P43 custom stock/grip combo, counter-sunk muzzle with tactical bayonet and deploy yourself out of the assault chute and confront said liberal employing only the most masterful trigger discipline and neutralize the tango.
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Oct 12, 2015 14:59
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once i had a break in. except it wasnt the sound of a marble, it was the sound of my door splintering and being kicked in. OP, are you sure it wasnt that sound?
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Oct 12, 2015 15:04
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Run to the back yard and hide until I leave
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Oct 12, 2015 15:09
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maybe someone just posted a marble through your letterbox
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Oct 12, 2015 15:17
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im the marble bandit ..
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Oct 12, 2015 15:23
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what was his name?
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Oct 12, 2015 15:29
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OP start a dialogue with this intruder and try to understand his perspective for breaking into your house and see if it isn't somehow in fact you that is in fault for this
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Oct 12, 2015 15:45
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ANIME IS BLOOD posted:OP start a dialogue with this intruder and try to understand his perspective for breaking into your house and see if it isn't somehow in fact you that is in fault for this If that doesn't work, poo poo in your hand and throw it at him.
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Oct 12, 2015 15:56
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Before I exited my room, I yelled "I have a gun, if I see you, you're dead!". Fortunately there was no one else in the house. If there was, I would have been screwed, because I don't actually have a gun. Anyhow, I didn't find anything unusual in the kitchen, which is weird because I could have sworn that I heard what sounded like a marble dropping on the floor. I was working with automotive resin last night, maybe the fumes made me hallucinate?
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Oct 12, 2015 16:10
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DaveSplitter posted:Before I exited my room, I yelled "I have a gun, if I see you, you're dead!". Fortunately there was no one else in the house. If there was, I would have been screwed, because I don't actually have a gun. Last words you ever post??
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Oct 12, 2015 16:24
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Joust posted:Last words you ever post?? Actually, I just posted in some other threads. So no.
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Oct 12, 2015 16:29
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Kill yourself so he can't rape you edit: 
my kinda ape fucked around with this message at 16:33 on Oct 12, 2015 |
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Oct 12, 2015 16:31
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| # ? Apr 26, 2024 19:16 |
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DaveSplitter posted:I heard a weird noise coming from the kitchen that sounded likE a marble dropping, but I don't own any marbles. I'm too afraid to go out and check; there's probably some sort of thug out there. I've decided to play it safe and lock myself in my room. nah don't worry about it it's just me rummaging through your fridge
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Oct 12, 2015 16:31
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