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Originally this thread was going to be about "geek" products generally, but oh my god Star Wars has completely cornered the market on making baffling poo poo. A Death Star cutting board. Why? What advantage does this offer over a normal cutting board, except for channels for liquids to puddle and mold in?  Of course.  Why?  Oh good, now I can pretend someone hit a tiny head of Darth Vader through my back loving windshield.  If you wanted to say you have no family or are alone, you could have just bought the one that says "Star Wars".  If you wear cufflinks, you don't wear these.  If you use a yoga mat, you don't use this one.  Storm troopers AND zombies?! Sign me the gently caress up!!  The movie isn't even out!! You don't even know who this is!!!! You don't have to serve chips off it yet!!!!!!!!! Source: 3 minutes on thinkgeek, I didn't even have to be selective I just clicked on stuff
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Oct 13, 2015 17:12
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Why? Because idiots buy millions of 'em that's why. Dehumanize and face the capitalism.
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Oct 13, 2015 17:13
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I thoguht that the new Battlefield seemed kinda fun but that guys in imp zone all said bad things about it so now im confused?
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Oct 13, 2015 17:14
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like someone will for real trample and kill you in a store to get at those stupid plastic shits
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Oct 13, 2015 17:14
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Pick posted:
That's a skeleton you idiot How do you even gently caress that up
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Oct 13, 2015 17:15
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Pick posted:Originally this thread was going to be about "geek" products generally, but oh my god Star Wars has completely cornered the market on making baffling poo poo. nerds just got rekt also keep in mind this is the fault of anyone who accepts a job in marketing and the entire result of post industrial capitalism, which continues to grow and morph into something more vile like the The Blob )google it to buy merchandise about The Blob)
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Oct 13, 2015 17:15
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Geoff Zahn posted:That's a skeleton you idiot You don't outline regular skeletons in green! e: also skroo u  
Pick fucked around with this message at 17:19 on Oct 13, 2015 |
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Oct 13, 2015 17:15
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 In case you needed to FLIP your MEAT with a STAR WARS  Dress your child as an incestuous cloud of pop culture  this is great though Pick fucked around with this message at 17:21 on Oct 13, 2015 |
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Oct 13, 2015 17:18
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That little sphere robot actually makes sense, at least. The rest of that merchandise is pretty bad I hope it's just all bought by idiot grandmas whose grandchildren once foolishly mentioned liking star wars around them
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Oct 13, 2015 17:21
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I flip my meat to slave Leia, if you know what I mean. (I jerk off.)
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Oct 13, 2015 17:22
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more like tard wars, imo
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Oct 13, 2015 17:22
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Aralan posted:That little sphere robot actually makes sense, at least. The rest of that merchandise is pretty bad I hope it's just all bought by idiot grandmas whose grandchildren once foolishly mentioned liking star wars around them my grandchild will love strategically burnt bread! 
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Oct 13, 2015 17:23
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Pick posted:
How many different types of TIE fighters can be bought as cufflinks? I mean, if they had like the TIE Defender or the TIE stealth, I would consider it. Is there a TIE tie?
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Oct 13, 2015 17:23
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episodes I, II, and III
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Oct 13, 2015 17:25
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Acid Haze posted:How many different types of TIE fighters can be bought as cufflinks? I mean, if they had like the TIE Defender or the TIE stealth, I would consider it. what do you loving think    
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Oct 13, 2015 17:26
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 this isn't a photoshop, that's actually the official trading card of c3po that they printed and put into packs
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Oct 13, 2015 17:28
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I don't know, this website seems pretty cool.
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Oct 13, 2015 17:32
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More like Threefeetio. Goddamn, look at that flag pole.
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Oct 13, 2015 17:37
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Pulp Can Move posted:More like Threefeetio. Goddamn, look at that flag pole. diplomatic relations 
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Oct 13, 2015 17:47
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Pick posted:
This.  The movie isn't out yet, this thing appeared for a moment in the trailer, and people are going nuts over it, I'm baffled. For all you know, this is Janitor Droid 7, rolling around the desert cleaning up banta poo poo.
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Oct 13, 2015 17:57
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Where are the pointy ears?
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Oct 13, 2015 17:58
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http://www.digitaltrends.com/home/nerd-alert-how-to-make-a-star-wars-themed-breakfast-in-honor-of-may-the-fourth/ Only good Star Wars merch is a copy of TIE Fighter and X-Wing Alliance
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Oct 13, 2015 18:00
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im going to murder a start wars fan. well i was supposed to be asleep two hours ago godbue
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Oct 13, 2015 18:26
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Pick posted:
My sister bought me a matched set of Star Wars spatulas for my birthday, which I politely requested she take back. I'm 52 years old.
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Oct 13, 2015 18:31
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 Been seeing this around lately, because nothing says Star Wars like bbq tongs.
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Oct 13, 2015 18:33
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Bimmi posted:My sister bought me a matched set of Star Wars spatulas for my birthday, which I politely requested she take back. I'm 52 years old. go home grandpa
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Oct 13, 2015 18:35
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Pick posted:Most lovely & Confusing "Star Wars" Products 
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Oct 13, 2015 18:45
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I keep reading this thread as "make lovely and confusing Star Wars products." and then getting sad because I want to bust out some zany product ideas. Like a lightsaber dildo.
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Oct 13, 2015 18:54
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live long and proper
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Oct 13, 2015 18:56
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Applewhite posted:I keep reading this thread as "make lovely and confusing Star Wars products." and then getting sad because I want to bust out some zany product ideas. there's no way this doesn't already exist
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Oct 13, 2015 18:57
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My Q-Face posted:This. As our culture moves towards more instant gratification and on demand entertainment, people start attaching themselves to any crumb of media. This is why you'll see fan art for games the day after they are announced with a vague trailer.
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Oct 13, 2015 18:59
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notZaar posted:As our culture moves towards more instant gratification and on demand entertainment, people start attaching themselves to any crumb of media. This is why you'll see fan art for games the day after they are announced with a vague trailer. Overwatch had some sexy babes tho. My favorite part was how it was obviously cashing in on the success of Big Hero 6.
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Oct 13, 2015 19:01
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Applewhite posted:I keep reading this thread as "make lovely and confusing Star Wars products." and then getting sad because I want to bust out some zany product ideas. that would hurt a lot
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Oct 13, 2015 19:02
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BlueStory is bookmarking as hard as gently caress right now
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Oct 13, 2015 19:04
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my favorite starwars toy was the snes empire strikes back game.
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Oct 13, 2015 19:11
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Pick posted:
Vader and Padme's children include: -Luke -Leia -A stormtrooper and of course -A robot No wonder she died in childbirth in sci-fi times, she had to push a full-sized Artoo through her vag e: remember the scene in Ep 3 where she shot out a baby and immediately yelled what its name would be, then did it again
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Oct 13, 2015 19:12
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Star Trek's pretty bad too. I know there's a ton of worse stuff, this is just scraping the surface: Exercise: the final frontier for the true Star Trek fan     Soap: the second most final frontier after exercise   
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Oct 13, 2015 19:13
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Oct 13, 2015 19:13
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is this seriously a Star-Trek-themed coffin 
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Oct 13, 2015 19:15
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loquacius posted:is this seriously a Star-Trek-themed coffin lol no, nobody that likes star trek would fit in a human-shaped coffin
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