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He finally wrote out his Last Will and Taste-ament. Thank you and good night, Teriyaki Koinku fucked around with this message at 16:52 on Oct 28, 2015 |
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Oct 28, 2015 16:50
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 12:03 |
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Oct 28, 2015 16:52
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He said "this caviar is malignant"
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Oct 28, 2015 16:53
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did he get the cancer from eating too much red and processed meat? 
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Oct 28, 2015 16:54
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He went home and killed his whole family and then himself
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Oct 28, 2015 16:55
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That's gold, Jerry! Gold!
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Oct 28, 2015 16:55
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Nooner posted:did he get the cancer from eating too much red and processed meat? The critic couldn't finish the article because he had his colon removed so yes.
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Oct 28, 2015 16:56
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He said, "It was very daring to serve tumor as your main course"
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Oct 28, 2015 16:58
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He probably took a moment to digest the information and then began his journey through the stages of grief. I imagine he took some time with his friends and loved ones and let them know how important they were to him. he probably got his affairs in order, updated his will, and began a rigorous course of medication. The treatment left him nauseous and weak, and his family stayed with him the whole time even though it was taking a toll on their lives too. Eventually, after seeming to get better for a short while, he died.
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Oct 28, 2015 16:58
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He asked "What type of wine goes good with that?"
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Oct 28, 2015 16:59
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mr.capps posted:He asked "What type of wine goes good with that?" Pinot Grief-io.
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Oct 28, 2015 17:00
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TheRamblingSoul posted:Pinot Grief-io. it appears to be muscatisizing
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Oct 28, 2015 17:03
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only lived long enough to write tumor reviews
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Oct 28, 2015 17:04
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Hey it's great to be here at the Rowdy Trout lemme tell ya. How is everyone doing tonight? I thought I'd start things off with a little improve just to get the ball rolling. Okay so first I'm gonna need a person. I'm hearing a lot of "Goku"s so let's go with that. Now I need a problem. Okay a lot of "Cucks" and "I'm Gay." Now I need a place. Woah, alright, Doobie's Dog House it is. Alright so I'm gay Goku, and I just found out I'm getting cucked at Doobie's Dog House. *does Goku voice* Oh, Vegeta! What are you doing? *Vegeta voice* Goku! I'm just deepthroating this Doobie Dog! Sorry you had to find out like this. *pantomimes fellatio*
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Oct 28, 2015 17:10
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Nooner posted:did he get the cancer from eating too much red and processed meat?
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Oct 28, 2015 17:10
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"looks like this will be my last meal-anoma"
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Oct 28, 2015 17:12
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He went and had a hamburger alone and cried quietly to himself.
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Oct 28, 2015 17:13
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he probably wished he had made some kind of meaningful contribution to the world with his life instead of telling me about how fuckin sickkkk duck tastes
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Oct 28, 2015 17:14
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where did you get your training applewhite? second city?
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Oct 28, 2015 17:14
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So a funny thing happened to me on the way over here: I stepped in poo poo! So I wiping it off on a lamppost and I'm saying to myself, "Jesus Christ I'm not even there yet and I'm already shitposting!"
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Oct 28, 2015 17:15
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there is a great evil at work in this thread
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Oct 28, 2015 17:16
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mr.capps posted:where did you get your training applewhite? second city? They rejected my audition  I toured with Third City for a while. They're a Second City cover troupe.
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Oct 28, 2015 17:16
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Oh third city, isn't that the one with Neil Garry? Boy, is he snarky and grumpy
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Oct 28, 2015 17:17
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social vegan posted:he probably wished he had made some kind of meaningful contribution to the world with his life instead of telling me about how fuckin sickkkk duck tastes duck is really good tbf
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Oct 28, 2015 17:18
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TheRamblingSoul posted:Pinot Grief-io.  edit: jerry did you see the Holiday av I made for you, it was to make amends and settle our beef 
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Oct 28, 2015 17:18
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Jerry Mumphrey posted:duck is really good tbf ya it's loving sickkkk didn't know how to pronounce confit for a long time lol the egg on my face when i took a dandy dame out for a night on the town and I'm asking for duck confetti lol good times good times
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Oct 28, 2015 17:19
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Nooner posted:
no i didnt i tried looking for that thread but i thinkit disappeared
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Oct 28, 2015 17:20
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he cleansed his palate with a last-will-and-taste-a-mint
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Oct 28, 2015 17:20
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mr.capps posted:Oh third city, isn't that the one with Neil Garry? Boy, is he snarky and grumpy Haha yeah he's a laugh riot!
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Oct 28, 2015 17:21
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Please Applewhite, what he caused in Palm Beach was a riot. Just a riot. There were no laughs about it. He said a very bad thing.
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Oct 28, 2015 17:22
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he was sous-vide by his wife and two loving daughters.
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Oct 28, 2015 17:22
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Hell Yeah posted:he was sous-vide by his wife and two loving daughters. he really loved those grills
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Oct 28, 2015 17:23
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This is a thread of good wholesome healthy jokes, I enjoy it
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Oct 28, 2015 17:30
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He said "I have a tumor" but the bartender thought he said "I'll have two more" and brought him two more glasses of whiskey! He sighed and drank them both.
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Oct 28, 2015 17:31
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I cannot recommend the cancer soup.
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Oct 28, 2015 17:32
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No but seriously you're a great audience. After all it's thanks to you guys that America leads the world... In obesity! Haha just kidding! Hey that reminds me though, McDonalds asked me to drop this off with you guys on my way over here. *pulls out novelty sized "lifetime achievement award" prop*
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Oct 28, 2015 17:32
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Quote-Unquote posted:He probably took a moment to digest the information and then began his journey through the stages of grief. I imagine he took some time with his friends and loved ones and let them know how important they were to him. he probably got his affairs in order, updated his will, and began a rigorous course of medication. The treatment left him nauseous and weak, and his family stayed with him the whole time even though it was taking a toll on their lives too. Eventually, after seeming to get better for a short while, he died. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o9IXAJg4Vm0
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Oct 28, 2015 17:33
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Nooner posted:
can i plz see it? i want to se eit
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Oct 28, 2015 17:33
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He said "well with all the food preservatives and chemicals they put in these meats these days maybe i already am on chemotherapy" sorry to get a bit too real, but you guys seen Fed Up?
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Oct 28, 2015 17:34
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 12:03 |
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"This cancer is insipid and uninspired. I would give this disease 2 stars only because it's so aggressive." -Food Critic from the OP
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Oct 28, 2015 17:34
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