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Is this the new bad storyline thread?
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Nov 4, 2015 01:45
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Flaming Carrot is a gold mine for this sort of thing. Storms of reality!  Death gets drunk!  A hideous demise by word balloon!  Curious villains!  And the greatest villain of all time. 
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Nov 4, 2015 01:46
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Gaunab posted:Is this the new bad storyline thread? No.
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Nov 4, 2015 01:52
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For a while in the 80s Marvel perennial sidekick Rick Jones was dying of cancer from all his adventures with the Hulk. They did a fairly good job of treating it seriously with him hanging out in Rom helping Brandy Clark reintegrate into normal life after being a crazy Space Knight. Except for the conclusion, which was a tie in to Secret Wars II and has the Beyonder just curing him. Speaking of Rom partway through the series is a really bonkers development. When Rom first came to Earth he landed in the small Virginia town of Clairton, after some misunderstandings (what with being a giant robot who seemingly murders random people) he becomes friends with the townsfolk. Many adventures later the town finally gets another hero, a guy named Brock Jones with a suit that turns him into the Torpedo. Feeling that the town is safe Rom takes off to fight Dire Wraiths all over the world. Here's where it goes too far, turns out Brock kind of sucks as a hero as he AND THE ENTIRE TOWN, which is all of Rom's supporting cast, are secretly murdered by Dire Wraiths.
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Nov 4, 2015 01:56
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Knives Amilli posted:
I'll always laud this crossover as being the prototype for Venture Bros. Frank and Archie are Brock and Hank.
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Nov 4, 2015 02:47
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  Sadly this did not lead to Cap and Paladin's post transition adventures.
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Nov 4, 2015 04:49
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It doesn't even make sense, the Sisterhood seem like total TERFs.
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Nov 4, 2015 05:08
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Even a superhero who is pure in heart And says his prayers by night May become a capwolf when the wolfbane blooms And the autumn moon is bright.  Ferrule posted:It's my twitter background. I think the blond guy is supposed to be Roy Thomas
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Nov 4, 2015 07:39
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So there's this comic called Trouble, right,
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Nov 4, 2015 14:47
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One time, Archie did a crossover with Image where Sonic the Hedgehog teamed up with Spawn, ShadowHawk and the Savage Dragon.
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Nov 4, 2015 14:52
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Wheat Loaf posted:One time, Archie did a crossover with Image where Sonic the Hedgehog teamed up with Spawn, ShadowHawk and the Savage Dragon. Ken Penders is well-worn territory at this point but there's no way he doesn't turn up in this thread eventually.
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Nov 4, 2015 16:34
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Wheat Loaf posted:One time, Archie did a crossover with Image where Sonic the Hedgehog teamed up with Spawn, ShadowHawk and the Savage Dragon. Archie also crossed over with (the Archie-published version of) TMNT. For awhile, the original Mirage TMNT were considered part of Image and hung out with Savage Dragon and stuff. Those two versions of TMNT are also connected by a trans-dimensional floating cow head who sometimes eats the turtles to take them to other planets / dimensions / parts of the franchise. Frank Fosco made a TMNT vs Spawn comic to land a job working on TMNT. TMNT is basically insane with it's crossovers is my point I guess http://turtlepedia.wikia.com/wiki/Category:Crossovers
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Nov 4, 2015 18:22
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Wheat Loaf posted:One time, Archie did a crossover with Image where Sonic the Hedgehog teamed up with Spawn, ShadowHawk and the Savage Dragon. Speaking of Savage Dragon, while not a comic, I'm currently writing an article about this really weird cartoon crossover story between Street Fighter, Savage Dragon, Mortal Kombat and Wing Commander Academy that aired in the 90's. It's surprisingly not terrible (the animation of the SF episode aside, cripes), but it also gets incredibly dark towards the end. Anyway, in terms of comics, one of my favorite STAH.txt examples is Malibu's Street Fighter II. It came out pretty early into the series' success to the point that Super Street Fighter II hadn't happened yet and the writer only had twelve characters to play with. Then again, there were also fighters from the first game, but few people ever played that, writer included. Art aside, the first two issues weren't the worst for the most part. Full of silly poo poo, but not the worst. The second issue involved Balrog and Sagat teaming up against Ken and seemingly murdering him. Later on, Ryu's off training when a box is delivered to him. He opens it up to discover Ken's blood-soaked scalp and dramatically screams, "KEN! MY OLDEST FRIEND! NOOOOOOOO!" The third issue is completely bonkers. It shows the reactions of different SF characters in regards to Ken's death. Guile blows up a bar with a Sonic Boom, Zangief angrily snaps a bear's neck, Blanka puts on reading glasses and is horrified to see it in the newspaper (Ken taught him how to read, BTW). But the craziest is E. Honda, who ends up getting into a sparring match with crappy Malibu superhero the Ferret. Yes, Street Fighter took place in Malibu's continuity. The issue ends with a cliffhanger followed by an apology letter. See, Capcom wasn't too pleased with the comic (namely the violent, bloody scalping part) and told Malibu to stop publishing the comic. That'll happen and all, but it's hilarious that Malibu thought to outright say it, almost like it was a badge of honor. Then it ended with them explaining what stories were going to have been written had they not been canceled. Namely stuff about a bald Ken out for vengeance and stuff about evil clones.
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Nov 4, 2015 20:35
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Speaking of weird crossovers, Gen 13 also met Archie at one point. I think it was a celebration issue or something, because it had a lot of popular Indy comic characters appear.
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Nov 4, 2015 20:59
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Evil Mastermind posted:I dunno, given the kinds of batshit insane things that happen in your average superhero universe on a daily basis, a random elf with a gun shooting people for no reason makes perfect sense. Googling it, it turns out that Gerber literally didn't mean to go anywhere with it at all, and it was his attempt at a metaphor for the random cruelty of existence. Writers that followed him tried to do something with it, but if Gerber had had his way, it would've been a random, confusing background event that had literally no significance to the protagonists. They just live in a world with random homicidal elves. Nothing to be done for it.
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Nov 4, 2015 21:17
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Gavok posted:Art aside, the first two issues weren't the worst for the most part. Full of silly poo poo, but not the worst. The second issue involved Balrog and Sagat teaming up against Ken and seemingly murdering him. Later on, Ryu's off training when a box is delivered to him. He opens it up to discover Ken's blood-soaked scalp and dramatically screams, "KEN! MY OLDEST FRIEND! NOOOOOOOO!"  quote:But the craziest is E. Honda, who ends up getting into a sparring match with crappy Malibu superhero the Ferret. "Most embarrassing to Honda!"
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Nov 4, 2015 21:23
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In terms of bizarre crossovers, nothing beats 1999's The Darkness/Batman. A crossover between Top Cow's The Darkness character and Batman, it finds Jackie Estacado in Gotham city on the business of his uncle's crime family. Various things happen, Batman and the Darkness meet, they don't like each other blah blah blah. The crazy thing is that someone decided this vaguely in continuity one shot was the perfect time for an event of massive importance to The Darkness' running storyline as this was the comic where Jackie decides to stop working with his uncle and instead start his own crime family which kick off a long running arc that culminates in Jackie's love interest being murdered and his death.
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Nov 4, 2015 21:40
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I dunno, Harry Houdini showing up in Spawn to teach Simmons how to use his powers was pretty bizarre. And I don't mean like a jokey one-shot. I mean as an actual in-continuity thing. He even got his own trading card!  Spawn had a ton of  moments, like how in the last story arc God and Satan were born into the world as Wanda's kids, and spent all their time killing each other and resurrecting.
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Nov 4, 2015 21:56
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I wish I could find all the panels online, but pretty much the entire storyline of Shadowhawk going across the Image Universe looking for the cure to AIDs should be in here. The best part was him showing up in the Spawn comic, then Spawn refusing to use his hell powers to cure him because he had to save it for other stuff (this was when he still had his counter that was dropped). Then Shadowhawk dies from AIDs and they have a funeral that Troll gets really drunk at, crying about how great Shadowhawk was. Just found a picture of the cover for the funeral issue:  Thats one hell of a gravestone. Havoc904 fucked around with this message at 22:04 on Nov 4, 2015 |
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Nov 4, 2015 22:00
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Opposing Farce posted:Ken Penders is well-worn territory at this point but there's no way he doesn't turn up in this thread eventually. Yeah but basically the only actually entertaining Penders Moment was when he was in a war with the one other guy who wrote Archie Sonics at the time (Karl Bollers) over what to call Knuckles' little brother. Penders favoured Mace, Bollers favoured Kneecaps. Penders wrote a mini-series set in the future specifically to declare the kid to be called Mace the Echidna, and Bollers fired back by naming him Kneecapeon Mace The Echidna in the actual ongoing about Knuckles. When Penders got control of that poo poo back, the kid mysteriously stopped being featured much.
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Nov 4, 2015 22:01
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Hitler is my favorite Fantastic Four villain
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Nov 4, 2015 22:11
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Havoc904 posted:Shadowhawk Wasn't his deal that he broke the spines of criminals? And that the readers didn't know his secret identity?
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Nov 4, 2015 22:13
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Justice League Task Force was...a comic that existed. It was supposed to be about a team that took the missions that the main JL couldn't or wouldn't touch due to how public they were. Problem was, they literally never called, so the series was mostly about Martian Manhunter being a dick to Gypsy, L-Ron, The Ray and Triumph. Other C- and D-level characters rotated in and out during the run, since, well, look at who our main team consists of. ANYWAY, if you were not aware, Triumph was The Sentry of mid-90s DC, an original founder of the League who was erased from the timestream during their first mission so when he finally managed to make it back during Zero Hour shenanigans, nobody knew who the hell he was, everyone was a decade older, and he became pretty bitter about going from (his point of view) the Big Leagues to Baby's First Superhero Training. He and M. Manhunter hated each other from the word go, and Triumph is eventually kicked out of the Task Force. During the last issue of the series (which takes place on Christmas), Triumph goes back to the group and tries to make amends. It goes poorly and he storms off (if you want to read a series where literally everyone is miserable, JLTF is the comic for you!). HOWEVER, not too much earlier, Triumph got a wishing candle from Neron during Underworld Unleashed, which would give him back his lost years in exchange for his soul. He almost lights it right then but Gypsy talks him out of it by saying he saved her life and other positive junk like that and gets him to go back to J'onn one more time. BUT THEN INSTEAD, Ray and Gypsy find the discarded candle lying about and light it up because, hey, free candle! leading to the last page of JLTF:  He gets his lost ten years back but he sees that absolutely nothing else about the DCU has been changed (including Gypsy still being alive!) confirming that his life in fact had no meaning or impact on anyone. THE END THANKS FOR READING JUSTICE LEAGUE TASK FORCE AND MERRY CHRISTMAS! He was later turned into ice, stored at the JL headquarters, and was killed when that HQ was blown up during Morrison's JLA. Fuckin' Triumph. redbackground fucked around with this message at 22:41 on Nov 4, 2015 |
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Nov 4, 2015 22:14
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Evil Mastermind posted:I dunno, Harry Houdini showing up in Spawn to teach Simmons how to use his powers was pretty bizarre. I always get kind of annoyed when a piece of media turns Houdini into a secret real magician.
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Nov 4, 2015 22:21
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muscles like this? posted:I always get kind of annoyed when a piece of media turns Houdini into a secret real magician. It's kind of inevitable. Every semi-famous figure out there has at least one lovely story where they are secretly a legendary power. I read a book the other day where Johannes Gutenberg was secretly the strongest and most powerful magician in the world. (It was not a very good book.)
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Nov 4, 2015 22:24
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redbackground posted:Fuckin' Triumph. Wait wait wait, Morrison didn't just make up Triumph for that whole JLA arc? I honestly thought he did; a new character who got forgotten by everyone because he was erased from the timestream just felt like something you could easily make up on the spot for the purposes of the plot.
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Nov 4, 2015 22:24
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redbackground posted:Justice League Task Force was...a comic that existed. http://digitalpriest.com/legacy/comics/taskforce.html If you listen to how Priest tells it, he's basically never been on a comic where higher-ups weren't absolutely determined to gently caress with him.
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Nov 4, 2015 22:37
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ImpAtom posted:It's kind of inevitable. Every semi-famous figure out there has at least one lovely story where they are secretly a legendary power. I read a book the other day where Johannes Gutenberg was secretly the strongest and most powerful magician in the world. (It was not a very good book.) It's just that Houdini spent all of his free time trying to find out if the supernatural was real because his mother's death left him deeply depressed. He was kind of like James Randi in that he used his background in magic to expose mediums and other con artists. It's like the worst example of someone secretly magic.
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Nov 4, 2015 22:45
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He only did that so no one would ever suspect he was secretly a real wizard.  
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Nov 4, 2015 22:50
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Back in the day, Hasbro was going to be releasing a GI Joe figure of Rocky Balboa. Yes, the iconic Sylvester Stallone character who wasn't military-related. But whatever, they already had figures for a professional wrestler and a chunky football player (both of which are in the WWE Hall of Fame). Sure, Rocky, why not. As they were working on the deal to use Sly's likeness, Marvel started doing a series of issues that acted as data files for everything GI Joe. An issue of Joe bios, an issue of Cobra bios, info on the vehicles, etc. In the Joes issue, they had a full profile on Rocky with art and a backstory that tied him into the GI Joe universe. Turns out he was secretly training Joes on the side in the art of boxing. Probably got a lot of brownie points for singlehandedly ending the Cold War that one time. Here's the problem. Around the time of that issue's release, the deal between Hasbro and Stallone's people fell through. Annnnnd that made the whole published Rocky Balboa GI Joe bio into an awkward situation. As the next issue came out, it featured a retraction: Rocky Balboa is not and has never been a member of GI Joe. FreudianSlippers posted:He only did that so no one would ever suspect he was secretly a real wizard. You're a wizard, Harry!
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Nov 4, 2015 23:34
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Wanderer posted:http://digitalpriest.com/legacy/comics/taskforce.html Priest is so awesome, and it's a drat shame he doesn't write comics any more. He's the guy who had Spider-Man punch a woman to death, and afterwards, you didn't feel like it was a lovely thing Priest had done.
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Nov 5, 2015 00:07
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prefect posted:Priest is so awesome, and it's a drat shame he doesn't write comics any more. He's the guy who had Spider-Man punch a woman to death, and afterwards, you didn't feel like it was a lovely thing Priest had done. He also wrote that Wonder Woman story based on the concept "Should WW sleep with a dictator to prevent a war?" Actually, that arc would be perfect for this thread.
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Nov 5, 2015 01:07
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redbackground posted:He also wrote that Wonder Woman story based on the concept "Should WW sleep with a dictator to prevent a war?" Actually, that arc would be perfect for this thread. Did she? Also the sentry should be on the list, just for his origin as the best superhero ever whose erasure from history made everything ever worse. To his death were as an unstoppable monster Thor hit him really hard. It was amazingly terrible.
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Nov 5, 2015 01:16
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Priest is willing to get far enough out there that, even with context, he could populate a thread like this one almost by himself. Off the top of my head, there's Mephisto giving Everett Ross a pair of pants that he cannot remove in Black Panther, the sheer incomprehensibility of Q2, and the Steve/Wanda plot in Captain America and the Falcon.
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Nov 5, 2015 01:18
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I don't think anyone has mentioned that time some Apokalyptian Baddie whose name I cannot recall made Barda and Superman film a sex tape in the 80s.
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Nov 5, 2015 02:35
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Wanderer posted:the Steve/Wanda plot in Captain America and the Falcon. Which reminds me of the one Jeff Parker comic I didn't like, What If: Avengers: Disassembled. Disassembled just happened and in the aftermath, Beast (fittingly a mutant and Avenger like Wanda) decides that there has to be more to the whole event than "Wanda be crazy." He investigates and what follows is Parker going about an attempt at retconning the stuff he didn't agree with in Disassembled. For instance, there's a bit where Beast visits Dr. Strange and asks him about all the poo poo that went down. Strange -- who was a big player in the story -- has no idea what he's talking about. He uses his magic to watch the events as they transpired and runs commentary. "What? Of COURSE chaos magic exists. Huh? No, I would never use the Eye of Agamotto like that. Sorry, guys. That was a fake Dr. Strange that Wanda conjured to escape." Halfway into the issue, we finally get the big reveal. Wanda did have a collaborator who helped strike against the Avengers. It was none other than Captain America himself! Because, you know, they were all romantic and stuff in the Cap and Falcon book that was happening around that time! Not the worst twist, all things considered. It's also explained that Vision being destroyed was Cap's call because of Scott Pilgrim reasons. Beast decides that if they're dealing with a villainous Captain America, the best way to combat that is get Cyclops to lead a bunch of heroes into kicking the power couple's rear end. Long story short, the chaos magic goes incredibly wrong and a bunch of heroes are simply wiped away from reality. Iron Man's explanation for the big Cap twist is, "Turns out being frozen all those years really hosed up your brain. I probably should have seen it coming. Let's not talk about the fact that it took you so many years to finally act on your newly-revealed craziness." Cap convinces Wanda to chaos magic them into nonexistence or some bullshit. While there's a rift of magic open, Strange is able to show Beast what would have happened had he not gotten involved. House of M would've happened and the "No more mutants!" situation would've fixed Cap's head and made him forget that he had any involvement in any of this. Beast is distraught. The end. In other words, it's a What If issue that's really the writer going, "No, THIS is what really happened," which includes Captain America being secretly crazy but not anymore.
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Nov 5, 2015 02:36
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tragedyjones posted:I don't think anyone has mentioned that time some Apokalyptian Baddie whose name I cannot recall made Barda and Superman film a sex tape in the 80s. Sleez! He was banished from Apokolips because he was too much of a sleazebag even by Darkseid's standards.
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Nov 5, 2015 02:59
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tragedyjones posted:I don't think anyone has mentioned that time some Apokalyptian Baddie whose name I cannot recall made Barda and Superman film a sex tape in the 80s. If I am not mistaken I think Barda was based, personality wise, on Kirby's wife. So let that add an extra stink for you.
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Nov 5, 2015 03:25
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Valiant Comics scored the Nintendo license and started making comics for them. The Super Mario Bros. Super Show was around, so naturally they did comics based on the cartoon versions of Mario and Link. Captain N was on TV, but there were certain major characters (Mega Man and Simon Belmont) who were third party, so they ended up replacing them with Samus Aran and shockingly made it a million times better than it had any right to be. Then there was Game Boy. A comic about the Game Boy. How the hell do you make a comic about the Game Boy?  What followed was four issues of one of the outright strangest comics I've ever read. It all revolves around this dude named Herman Smirch, a middle-aged rear end in a top hat who stole a Game Boy from work and would regularly play Super Mario Land so he could get to the final boss and lose on purpose because gently caress you, Mario. Then one day, Tatanga, the obscure alien guy who only showed up in the Mario Land games bursts out of the Game Boy with all his minions and Princess Daisy. Despite being very, very tiny, they intend to conquer the world. Regularly, Mario would be summoned out of the Game Boy by a random kid to take on Tatanga and save everyone. Herman would appear as Tatanga's mostly-unwilling flunky in each issue and would be drawn less cartoony than the video game characters. It led to this wonderful exchange.  When I originally posted this on 4thletter six years ago, I apparently named that image "unsmith.jpg."  Good going, still-in-my-20's me.
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Nov 5, 2015 05:02
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tragedyjones posted:I don't think anyone has mentioned that time some Apokalyptian Baddie whose name I cannot recall made Barda and Superman film a sex tape in the 80s. John Byrne in a nutshell.
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Nov 5, 2015 05:04
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