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nomadologique
Mar 9, 2011

DUNK A DILL PICKLE REALDO

gnarlyhotep posted:

Just want to interject here and say

gently caress you Franco (aka Spanish Manlove) for reporting this thread

and for most of the other reports you make

you were a poo poo mod and are an even more poo poo reporter

LOL

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nomadologique
Mar 9, 2011

DUNK A DILL PICKLE REALDO


(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

Somebody fucked around with this message at 07:24 on Nov 12, 2015

SEGA Ass Fisting
Feb 15, 2012

KEEP IT TIGHT!

gnarlyhotep posted:

Just want to interject here and say

gently caress you Franco (aka Spanish Manlove) for reporting this thread

and for most of the other reports you make

you were a poo poo mod and are an even more poo poo reporter

You're the best gnarly. You almost make me want to put effort into my posts. almost.

gnarlyhotep
Sep 30, 2008

by Lowtax
Oven Wrangler

Rape Stink posted:

You're the best gnarly. You almost make me want to put effort into my posts. almost.

anything I can do to help

Android Apocalypse
Apr 28, 2009

The future is
AUTOMATED
and you are
OBSOLETE

Illegal Hen
I sharted about a month ago just as I was about to take a 10-hour drive back home. Luckily I was only 10 minutes away from my mom's place so I turned around & cleaned myself up.

I also came down with some nasty cold/flu so I just attributed the sharting to being sick.

Today I had a mini shart situation after leaving work & was going to go to the gym. Got to the gym, washed my poop-stained underwear & put them in my empty Tupperware lunch container.

Tonight I've spent a good hour with diarrhea. I'm starting to think I need to call a doctor or an exorcist.

Frostwerks
Sep 24, 2007

by Lowtax

Android Bicyclist posted:

I sharted about a month ago just as I was about to take a 10-hour drive back home. Luckily I was only 10 minutes away from my mom's place so I turned around & cleaned myself up.

I also came down with some nasty cold/flu so I just attributed the sharting to being sick.

Today I had a mini shart situation after leaving work & was going to go to the gym. Got to the gym, washed my poop-stained underwear & put them in my empty Tupperware lunch container.

Tonight I've spent a good hour with diarrhea. I'm starting to think I need to call a doctor or an exorcist.

a good thing to do if you've got diarrhea is to buy a box of frosted mini-wheats, yeah? and take them and shove them up your rear end in a top hat.

Dr. Lariat
Jul 1, 2004

by Lowtax

Android Bicyclist posted:

I sharted about a month ago just as I was about to take a 10-hour drive back home. Luckily I was only 10 minutes away from my mom's place so I turned around & cleaned myself up.

I also came down with some nasty cold/flu so I just attributed the sharting to being sick.

Today I had a mini shart situation after leaving work & was going to go to the gym. Got to the gym, washed my poop-stained underwear & put them in my empty Tupperware lunch container.

Tonight I've spent a good hour with diarrhea. I'm starting to think I need to call a doctor or an exorcist.

Sorry, the correct answer is;

you put them in the garbage.

communism bitch
Apr 24, 2009

gnarlyhotep posted:

Just want to interject here and say

gently caress you Franco (aka Spanish Manlove) for reporting this thread

and for most of the other reports you make

you were a poo poo mod and are an even more poo poo reporter

Lol

Isaac
Aug 3, 2006

Fun Shoe
I had campiloabachter jejuni for like 3 weeks shitmyself 2 times. Gnarly gassed my thread about it.

I was making GBS threads alot

Gasbraai
Oct 25, 2010

Lictor my Dictor

Isaac posted:

I had campiloabachter jejuni for like 3 weeks shitmyself 2 times. Gnarly gassed my thread about it.

I was making GBS threads alot

How's the blind chicken doing? Still making GBS threads up a storm on your porch?

Isaac
Aug 3, 2006

Fun Shoe

Lunixnerd posted:

How's the blind chicken doing? Still making GBS threads up a storm on your porch?

I put it in the goat yard

wiffle ball bat
Oct 2, 2015

by Shine

gnarlyhotep posted:

Just want to interject here and say

gently caress you Franco (aka Spanish Manlove) for reporting this thread

and for most of the other reports you make

you were a poo poo mod and are an even more poo poo reporter

er mah lmao

that guys got emotional issues

wiffle ball bat
Oct 2, 2015

by Shine
shart free for over a year, which means im about due.

Bloody Hedgehog
Dec 12, 2003

💥💥🤯💥💥
Gotta nuke something

Erethizon_dorsatum posted:

How does this happen to a 28 yr old adult

That's the secret. Sharting happens more as you get older. You have less control over you're butthole as you age, so by the time you hit about 70 you just try not to fart ever, as every fart will end up a shart.

Node
May 20, 2001

KICKED IN THE COOTER
:dings:
Taco Defender
Yep. This thread sure is GBS alright.

If you want some real advice, practice this game, and get all the rewards on it: http://www.kongregate.com/games/rete/dont-poo poo-your-pants .

Node fucked around with this message at 11:02 on Nov 12, 2015

wiffle ball bat
Oct 2, 2015

by Shine
sharting is a powerful event in someone's life and is worthy of serious discussion. if you dont want to talk about sharting, kindly go find another place to post that is more your speed and style. thanks.

Rond
Mar 2, 2015
Happened to me once when I was sick...

that's so gross

wiffle ball bat
Oct 2, 2015

by Shine
the memory of the shart is just as sticky and distressing as the shart itself

Isaac
Aug 3, 2006

Fun Shoe
I didnt trust a fart for 6 weeks after i sharted

Spanish Manlove
Aug 31, 2008

HAILGAYSATAN

gnarlyhotep posted:

Just want to interject here and say

gently caress you Franco (aka Spanish Manlove) for reporting this thread

and for most of the other reports you make

you were a poo poo mod and are an even more poo poo reporter

you're a poo poo mod and everyone hates you why do you let this kinda garbage stay in GBS?

Erethizon_dorsatum
Nov 14, 2009

Spanish Manlove posted:

you're a poo poo mod and everyone hates you why do you let this kinda garbage stay in GBS?

My thread isn't garbage :(

Spanish Manlove
Aug 31, 2008

HAILGAYSATAN

Erethizon_dorsatum posted:

My thread isn't garbage :(

It's.

momerath
Nov 15, 2014
i remember my first shart. it was at a restaurant and i remember one of the workers came in and he definitely saw my poo poo covered boxers on the ground, dude didn't react at all so i'm assuming he saw that happen at least a dozen times

communism bitch
Apr 24, 2009

Spanish Manlove posted:

you're a poo poo mod and everyone hates you why do you let this kinda garbage stay in GBS?

u shouldnt backseat mod or modsass u know

Spanish Manlove
Aug 31, 2008

HAILGAYSATAN

Oberleutnant posted:

u shouldnt backseat mod or modsass u know

carl, i'm sorry your fragile state got mutated by irony awakening.

WIFEY WATCHDOG
Jun 25, 2012

Yeah, well I don't trust this guy. I think he regifted, he degifted, and now he's using an upstairs invite as a springboard to a Super Bowl sex romp.
Had a tiny shart the other day, first in almost 2 decades. A little worrying tbh

bradzilla
Oct 15, 2004

Welcome to the Pre-30s op, the incontinence only gets worse from here

Mozi
Apr 4, 2004

Forms change so fast
Time is moving past
Memory is smoke
Gonna get wider when I die
Nap Ghost

Spanish Manlove posted:

carl, i'm sorry your fragile state got mutated by irony awakening.

the only irony awakening here is in your pants (i'm assuming that poop contains a certain percentage of iron)

Microwaves Mom
Nov 8, 2015

by zen death robot

Erethizon_dorsatum posted:

I clamp down like a bear trap but it somehow wasn't enough this time

Oh my...
You're single you said? :buddy:

Moon Atari
Dec 26, 2010

I've never sharted before but it seems I'm a little younger than the average age of shart onset. This thread has got me real worried so I've ordered one of these in, don't know if it works anally but better safe than sorry.

soy
Jul 7, 2003

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

bradzilla posted:

Welcome to the Pre-30s op, the incontinence only gets worse from here

If you're not athletic yeah aka beta bitch.

BoonyPC
Feb 19, 2007
Someone missed the toilet completely and did a perfect pile of poo poo on the floor tonight....how the gently caress do you do that

goons will know

SPACE HOMOS
Jan 12, 2005

My friend really loves to tell everyone about the time he was driving through Canada for work when he felt pain in his gut. Ended up making GBS threads hot sludge into the snow on the side of the road.

bradzilla
Oct 15, 2004

BoonyPC posted:

Someone missed the toilet completely and did a perfect pile of poo poo on the floor tonight....how the gently caress do you do that

goons will know

intentionally

Puppy Galaxy
Aug 1, 2004

gnarlyhotep posted:

Just want to interject here and say

gently caress you Franco (aka Spanish Manlove) for reporting this thread

and for most of the other reports you make

you were a poo poo mod and are an even more poo poo reporter

Say what you will about Franco's moderating style, but he at least attempted to moderate

Pimpcasso
Mar 13, 2002

VOLS BITCH
spanish manlove would be a habitual reporter :lol:

Microwaves Mom
Nov 8, 2015

by zen death robot

Moon Atari posted:

I've never sharted before but it seems I'm a little younger than the average age of shart onset. This thread has got me real worried so I've ordered one of these in, don't know if it works anally but better safe than sorry.

Buttplug will help more.

Weener Beater
May 4, 2010

The Bible posted:

Back in college I was on an 8 hour road trip with my roommate. We stopped at a truck stop where he picked up what looked like a can of chewing tobacco but was actually just beef jerky in a quirky container.

He at a few bites and we continued for about an hour when he started doubling over groaning in pain. He quickly pulled over to the side, threw open the door and basically fell out of the truck, trailed by a jet of projectile vomit.

I wasn't sure what to do, so I just sat there asking him if he was ok while he was spraying puke everywhere and dry heaving so hard we later learned he cracked a rib.

Some time into this, I became aware of a second terrible smell that accompanied the already pervasive scent of vomit. Apparently his dry heaves were powerful enough to force his bowels into movement as well, and I could clearly hear the muffled bursts diarrhea rapidly overflowing his underwear and soaking his jeans from the inside out.

When he regained enough composure to stand again, he lay in the bed of the truck for the rest of the trip while I took over driving. I half expected him to find him dead at the end of the trip, but we got home and he stumbled to the bathroom to continue wretching and puking up bile in some rather disturbing tones for the rest of the night.

The next morning, I found him passed out in the bathtub, where he was forced to kneel, spraying unpredictably from either end.

One of the cats had dragged a sock over his face.

Memories. You really find out who your true friends are in times like these

School Nickname
Apr 23, 2010

*fffffff-fffaaaaaaarrrtt*
:ussr:

Bowlcutbarricade posted:

Everytime I poo poo myself I just flip my pants inside out

I did this for like a week when I was four. All while sitting on the john. I just forgot how to take a dump properly for a week.

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serious norman
Dec 13, 2007

im pickle rick!!!!
I shart daily and im 32. Good luck op.

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