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The toilet seat that I am sitting on right now.... is loose and it slides off to the side and i have to readjust to keep it on and I am worried that a disaster might befall me. stay tuned to this exciting thread to find out what happens next....................................................................................
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 14:07 |
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# ? Mar 19, 2024 06:05 |
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UPDATE: im not on the toilet anymore and nothing happened.
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 14:08 |
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that toilet seat is a ticking time bomb
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 14:10 |
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be careful out there
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 14:11 |
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a starwar betamax posted:UPDATE: im not on the toilet anymore and nothing happened. whew
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 14:13 |
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no big loss
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 14:14 |
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You probably won't get a close shave (if you get my meaning rofl) but you will probably fall over and make an embarrassing noise and knock some stuff over. The q tips will be every where. There goes your Sunday picking up all those q tips! e: guess it worked out enjoy your Sunday bud
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 14:15 |
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 14:15 |
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Indians dont even need loos, they have that magic river that absorbs and sterilizes all waste. Maybe an untouchable deity eats it???
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 14:21 |
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Have you considered not sitting down to pee, OP?
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 14:23 |
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Lilbeefer posted:Have you considered not sitting down to pee, OP? Standing up to pee is a fool's errand if you're not at a urinal, friend. Way too many things can go wrong. Once I was standing to pee at home and my kitten jumped between the tip of my doodle and the bowl, and I wound up peeing all over the poor girl.
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 14:28 |
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a starwar betamax posted:UPDATE: im not on the toilet anymore and nothing happened. Sorry to hear about your constipation.
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 14:38 |
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This killer toilet seat has all the makings of an excellent terrible horror movie.
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 15:23 |
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UPDATE: im heading back to the toilet again
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 15:23 |
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a starwar betamax posted:UPDATE: im heading back to the toilet again you live a dangerous life. godspeed.
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 15:24 |
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UPDATE: i using my wifes ACER ZENBOOK which has a touch screen..... so im taking advantage of this to draw a diagram that i hope helps illustide the situation...............
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 15:28 |
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(in motor head voice) it's time to play the game!
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 15:28 |
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I hate sitting down to pee and poo my dong I have to pull up or it touches the water
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 15:44 |
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I drank some laxative tea last night and I know that as soon as I go to poo poo I'm gonna be squirming on that seat. I hope the hinge on the seat is good because while I don't use my dick or balls for anything, I imagine losing them would be painful.
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 15:46 |
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I have a squatty potty. Because it makes me poop faster. Its pretty nice actually although I tend to spread my legs a lil wide so underpants and pants can be a complication on it.
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 15:56 |
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a starwar betamax posted:UPDATE: If your balls are bigger than your butt that might be the root of your problem, not the faulty hinge.
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 16:02 |
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op, next time please record your session on said toilet so we can better guide you. we are here to help.
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 16:38 |
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UPDATE: im at the ER theres been an accid
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 17:05 |
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hopefully the toilets there are a little better than your deathtrap op
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 17:37 |
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you are lucky your balls are small, i tried to save some time once by lowering a toilet seat and sitting down on it at the same time so my balls and my scrotum kinda swung forward and were caught under the soulless plastic the best part is your legs kinda switch off from the pain so you are unable to stand and relieve the pain, kinda like grabbing a live wire thing hope this post was informative and will save someone some grief in the future
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 17:42 |
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op it was your destiny to be a funny story that the ER doc tells to her husban to make him cringe when she gets home from work tonight bud
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 17:43 |
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ER lady saying something about..... Internal structural rupture? Goons?
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 18:39 |
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"we can rebuild him, we have the techology" *replaces starwar betamax's busted junk with a slide whistle and two kiwis*
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 18:40 |
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That seat was just doing the job your parents were too scared to do
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 19:58 |
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I also sit on a loose seat and also often have this fear occur to me. Eggs for testicles, some great lingo there I like it makes them seem even more fragile
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 20:09 |
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HMS Interwebs posted:Indians dont even need loos, they have that magic river that absorbs and sterilizes all waste. Maybe an untouchable deity eats it??? GANGA: Up to now scientists have not been able to understand why there are certain qualities in its waters which can’t be found in the water of any other river of the world. Even the rivers that flow from the same mountain from which the Ganges flows, do not have the same qualities as the Ganges. Ganges water does not putrefy, even after long periods of storage. River water begins to putrefy when lack of oxygen promotes the growth of anaerobic bacteria, which produce the tell-tale smell of stale water. Ganges absorbs thousands of dead bodies without stinking. It is surprising that though bones do not normally dissolve in water, they do in the water of the Ganges – nothing remains. The Ganges river dolphin was declared India’s National Aquatic Animal in 2009. Hindus are known to keep Ganga water in closed containers for various religious purposes. The water never goes bad or putrefies. This means that Ganga water contains lot of oxygen which can assimilate organic matter like human waste and vegetable matter. The amount of organic waste that goes into Ganga should have already exhausted the amount of oxygen. But this has not happened. There is some material present in Ganges that replenishes the oxygen content and kills the pathogens. Interestingly, boiled Ganga water does not have the capability to kill pathogens. Similarly, Yamuna, a river which joins Ganges, does not contain the special material present in Ganga. At the Malaria Research Center in New Delhi the Ganga water from its upper reaches didn't host mosquito breeding, and prevented breeding in any water it was added to. Other research demonstrated that cholera germs die within hours of immersion in Ganga water. As compared to the river Nile (6050 km.) or Amazon (6,500 km.), the total length of Ganga is only 2,525 km, but it carries the highest quantity of sediment ( 2.4 billion metric tons per year) which is greater than that carried by any other river of the world. Attempts have been made to create the qualities of the Ganges in many other places, but they have failed because the real keys for doing so are lost.
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 20:12 |
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Nice try; legs are too thick and penises and balls are too small to go into the bowl.
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 20:16 |
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is it true that you broke the toilet seat attempting to suck your own dick as suggested in another thread???
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 21:01 |
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a hole-y ghost posted:Magical GANGES Literally the closest thing on earth to a genuine river of poo poo, so, it's magical in a way
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 21:30 |
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ZombieParts posted:is it true that you broke the toilet seat attempting to suck your own dick as suggested in another thread??? no i would not do that that is imoral
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# ? Nov 29, 2015 22:00 |
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Also if that drawing was to scale he could have blown himself leaned back in a La-Z-Boy.
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# ? Nov 30, 2015 00:24 |
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ya i heard from the doctors your balls + Dick got sheared off by the loose toilet seat, and when they went to reattach them they couldn't find em so they just stapled some turds to your scrote and now all the nurses and staff are calling you poop balls
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# ? Nov 30, 2015 00:31 |
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"poor old poop balls" one nurse said. "he flushed his johnson down the toilet and now he's got poop for balls"
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# ? Nov 30, 2015 00:32 |
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Microwaves Mom posted:I hate sitting down to pee and poo my dong I have to pull up or it touches the water The Thirsty Bird. It is the curse of man. Easily as bad or worse than mensturals or childbirth.
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# ? Nov 30, 2015 00:51 |
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# ? Mar 19, 2024 06:05 |
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a starwar betamax posted:UPDATE: This toilet could never flush get out of there it might be a trap!!
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# ? Nov 30, 2015 00:55 |