Profession with the craziest people

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > General Bullshit > Profession with the craziest people

whoflungpoop: Sep 9, 2004; With you and the constellations

Bro Dad posted:

yeah, waffle house waitresses are the best

i had a waffle house waitress in Oklahoma City who signed the check as QUEENIE, GOOD GOD'S GRACE and drew a little cartoon of i guess her as an idealized nubian queen standing next to jesus

she was a good waitress tho i tipped well

# ? Dec 18, 2015 15:49

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 25, 2024 01:10

social vegan: Nov 7, 2014

whoflungpoop posted:

i had a waffle house waitress in Oklahoma City who signed the check as QUEENIE, GOOD GOD'S GRACE and drew a little cartoon of i guess her as an idealized nubian queen standing next to jesus

she was a good waitress tho i tipped well

i've been workshopping a bible sequel too

# ? Dec 18, 2015 15:50

Scathach: Apr 4, 2011; You know that thing where you sleep on your arm funny and when you wake up it's all numb? Yeah that's my whole world right now.

Nurses are bugshit insane. I know more than one registered nurse that's all about crystals and angels.

# ? Dec 18, 2015 16:21

PHIZ KALIFA: Dec 21, 2011; #mood

Nurses, teachers, basically any job where you are the last catcher in the rye between people with the self-harm impulse of a labradore retriever puppy and a big ole crack in God's Green Earth labeled "poverty."

I used to be able to shotgun two whole bottles of soju (korean hard liquor) before stumbling to my job at the orphanarium and lying to a bunch of children about grammar.

Writers are hosed up, the even worse people are the ones who talk about being writers but never publish or revise their work. Or the people who still do that, but put their works *FOR SOME REASON* for sale on Amazon and other not-writers slobber over how "good" the work is in hopes that their fame rubs off on them.

Union employees (people working for the union itself) also tend to either be laughably corrupt fat old white men and young, poor people of color working 80 hours a week while trying to justify their liberal arts diplomas.

Basically everyone is loving insane because adult life is one big long compromise between what you should be doing to make other people rich and what you want to be doing to make other people rich. the only sane ones are the ones who don't work, who hide out online flinging opinions like spitballs into an apathetic hellscape of their own creation.

hiiiii i'm a teacher. im the guy donald trump called fat cause i yelled at him.

# ? Dec 18, 2015 17:57

PHIZ KALIFA: Dec 21, 2011; #mood

Engineers (electrical) tend to view everything they're able to do as some sort of Magitek hybrid, where their principles are sound until you realize that they're telling you how to build an unlicensed tesla coil in order to "purify" the aura of your house. multiple, MULTIPLE engineering profs would stop class to talk about how good/helpful it is to build an air ionizer, because ions are manna to nerds.

edit- yeah everything nerds do, basically. if it's related to consumer electronics, it's the reason there won't be birds or fish in 50 years.
"hurrr let's use the most advanced technicals in the world to sell jiggly cartoon breasts to dudes worshipping the platonic ideal of sex." vidya is basically a punch & judy show held up with chewing gum and scotch tape and a fervent prayer that nothing breaks bad enough that you notice how fleeting and insubstantial an experience this is.

edit- my job leaves me with a lot of time to ruminate.

PHIZ KALIFA fucked around with this message at 18:01 on Dec 18, 2015

# ? Dec 18, 2015 17:59

Booblord Zagats: Oct 30, 2011; Pork Pro

PHIZ KALIFA posted:

Engineers (electrical) tend to view everything they're able to do as some sort of Magitek hybrid, where their principles are sound until you realize that they're telling you how to build an unlicensed tesla coil in order to "purify" the aura of your house. multiple, MULTIPLE engineering profs would stop class to talk about how good/helpful it is to build an air ionizer, because ions are manna to nerds.

edit- yeah everything nerds do, basically. if it's related to consumer electronics, it's the reason there won't be birds or fish in 50 years.
"hurrr let's use the most advanced technicals in the world to sell jiggly cartoon breasts to dudes worshipping the platonic ideal of sex." vidya is basically a punch & judy show held up with chewing gum and scotch tape and a fervent prayer that nothing breaks bad enough that you notice how fleeting and insubstantial an experience this is.

edit- my job leaves me with a lot of time to ruminate.

Mechanical Engineers are almost always white trash with a better income. They always seem to have a jet ski and a pair of 4-wheelers or dirtbikes in the bed of their financed F-250 with oversized tires.

Scathach posted:

Nurses are bugshit insane. I know more than one registered nurse that's all about crystals and angels.

They're also the single largest profession you'll find at a swinger/sex/etc club and it is by a huge margin

# ? Dec 18, 2015 18:04

YeahTubaMike: Mar 24, 2005; *hic* Gotta finish thish . . .; Doctor Rope

vug posted:

Teachers

i don't know if this is confirmation bias or what, but i have literally never had or known an english teacher who was well-adjusted and normal

# ? Dec 18, 2015 18:10

remigious: May 13, 2009; Destruction comes inevitably; Hell Gem

Scathach posted:

Nurses are bugshit insane. I know more than one registered nurse that's all about crystals and angels.

It's frightening how many nursing students I worked with while I was in retail, they were all dumb as poo poo and I shudder to think that they are now in charge of the well being of other humans.
They do make more money than me, though

# ? Dec 18, 2015 18:10

Helical Nightmares: Apr 30, 2009

Booblord Zagats posted:

Mechanical Engineers are almost always white trash with a better income. They always seem to have a jet ski and a pair of 4-wheelers or dirtbikes in the bed of their financed F-250 with oversized tires.

They're also the single largest profession you'll find at a swinger/sex/etc club and it is by a huge margin

Both totally accurate.

I can explain the first because a lot of the dudes who go into ME degrees really love cars.

I can't necessarily explain the second except nursing does give a decent amount of time off for some women to train for marathons/triathlons and then there is the stress of the job which translates into randyness.

# ? Dec 18, 2015 18:15

Helical Nightmares: Apr 30, 2009

YeahTubaMike posted:

i don't know if this is confirmation bias or what, but i have literally never had or known an english teacher who was well-adjusted and normal

Come to think of it I cant either.

Edit: Came up with four examples of well-adjusted English teachers I've had but none fit into the "normal" category.

-one was an 70 year old nun and life long English high school teacher. She was challenging but fair. If she was crazy she didn't bring it into the classroom. Someone who chooses the religious vocation I don't consider in the category of "normal"

-one was a Brother of Saint Patrick and got through the day by being endlessly sarcastic to his students (we deserved it). Also one of the more competent people on campus, but again religious order so not "normal"

-one was an exceptional English teacher who moved up to Assistant Principal so he was smart enough to leave teaching English behind.

-one was a very affable Irish dude who I learned later had lived through and participated in "The Troubles" in Ireland, and was a certified badass with a host of martial arts medals in sparring. One of the most well balanced and calmest people I have ever met. I sincerely regret not having the opportunity to drink with the gent.

Helical Nightmares fucked around with this message at 18:31 on Dec 18, 2015

# ? Dec 18, 2015 18:17

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bazJSO_cNps

# ? Dec 18, 2015 18:19

Booblord Zagats: Oct 30, 2011; Pork Pro

Helical Nightmares posted:

I can explain the first because a lot of the dudes who go into ME degrees really love cars.

Yeah, thats always the case. I've just yet to meet one that is good with his money, those guys make really bad financial decisions non-stop. If I'm ever helping repo guys find and recover a vehicle from someone with a degree, it's almost always an ME degree

# ? Dec 18, 2015 18:19

Roflan: Nov 25, 2007

Republican politician.

# ? Dec 18, 2015 18:20

Drad_Bert: Jun 26, 2013; by Smythe

Small Business owners

# ? Dec 18, 2015 18:23

Male Tiers: Dec 27, 2012; Why don't you just lay down your weapons now?

MikeCrotch posted:

Mass Shooters

This is objectively the right answer

# ? Dec 18, 2015 18:34

Booblord Zagats: Oct 30, 2011; Pork Pro

Drad_Bert posted:

Small Business owners

Yeah, my brother often claims that the chamber of commerce is an episode of Ricki Lake but two tax brackets higher

# ? Dec 18, 2015 18:36

PHIZ KALIFA: Dec 21, 2011; #mood

i'm a well-adjusted english teeaaahahahahahahaha gently caress me, i tutor ESL over skype and have a cat on my lap 8 out of 12 hours of my shift. my life = the best.

# ? Dec 18, 2015 18:37

Nut to Butt: Apr 13, 2009; by FactsAreUseless

retirees or forums proprietors

# ? Dec 18, 2015 18:38

Subvisual Haze: Nov 22, 2003; The building was on fire and it wasn't my fault.

It's Nurses. So many of the craziest and unhealthiest people I encounter are former or current nurses.

# ? Dec 18, 2015 19:02

Moridin920: Nov 15, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

PHIZ KALIFA posted:

Basically everyone is loving insane because adult life is one big long compromise between what you should be doing to make other people rich and what you want to be doing to make other people rich. the only sane ones are the ones who don't work, who hide out online flinging opinions like spitballs into an apathetic hellscape of their own creation.

# ? Dec 18, 2015 19:23