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Newly minted Space Grandpa Han "Yolo" Solo has caught wind of you nefarious nogoodniks trying to RUIN what is arguably the biggest moment of a lot of really sad peoples' lives and HE AIN'T HAPPY. LET 'EM HAVE IT, INDIANA:quote:Star Wars: The Force Awakens screenings kick off tonight for the general public, but that hasn't stopped spoiler squads from spreading their fun-ruining fingers across the internet. And in case you're thinking about stomping the surprise for other people, Harrison Ford has a message for you. Don't. for decades he has held nothing but utter contempt for this bullshit, but i guess there ARE moneyhats big enough that you'll turn that frown upsidedown and say "more please" mickey mouse: richer than god??????
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Dec 18, 2015 17:57
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I think he just wants people to experience the full impact of his character, han solo, getting murdered by his son kylo ren
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Dec 18, 2015 18:01
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Utter garbage thread
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Dec 18, 2015 18:02
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*star wars comes out* Ford: loving stupid *empire comes out* Ford: this is so loving stupid just kill my character okay??? *jedi comes out* Ford: okay fine college ain't cheap and neither are these planes i want to fly but i'm done after this, okay? I'M DONE *force awakens* Ford: Golly! Gee! I mean, isn't this exciting? I get to go on another adventure! And so do all my wonderful, excellent fans. Star Wars comes out on December 18th everybody! I'll see you at the premier!
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Dec 18, 2015 18:04
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tbh it would have been cool to not know anything going into the movie but that's just kinda one of the cons of having such prolific internet and social media all the time a good part of the population are bitter assholes who only get joy from trying to ruin other people's good time.
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Dec 18, 2015 18:04
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there is no way to enjoy this movie at all because there are OTHER PEOPLE and those OTHER PEOPLE can't just watch a loving movie like star wars and then move on with their lives it has to embody such a large portion of their character and identity, and if they could get away with it, it'd be a loving religion. these people are going to stomp into theaters wearing robes and masks and plastic swords and guns and they're going to clap every time a loving laser bolt flies across the screen and act like any dramatic turn on the screen is worthy of reproduction at The Globe these same people will then go home and get on their computers and tablets and smart phones and then proceed to suck the very essence and marrow out of this god drat thing until there is no more mystery. until there is nothing left to discuss. until they have to - swear to god - make up poo poo to talk about and before you know it, you get dipshit articles like UHMMMMM ACTUALLY WHEN YOU THING ABOUT IT LUKE SKYWALKER IS A JIHADI these morons are execrable and filthy in the queerest way and deserve to have their poo poo ruined before they bend before their dark altar at the local AMC it cannot be a thing that they just watch and leave alone. they have to live it.
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Dec 18, 2015 18:11
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cram me sideways posted:there is no way to enjoy this movie at all because there are OTHER PEOPLE and those OTHER PEOPLE can't just watch a loving movie like star wars and then move on with their lives ima just watch it in a couple weeks when the crowds are gone namaste
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Dec 18, 2015 18:13
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wait how is his son a black guy
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Dec 18, 2015 18:18
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Parallax Scroll posted:wait how is his son a black guy Dark Side Midichlorians
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Dec 18, 2015 18:19
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Parallax Scroll posted:wait how is his son a black guy Harrison fords not black? 
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Dec 18, 2015 18:21
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Aralan posted:I think he just wants people to experience the full impact of his character, han solo, getting murdered by his son kylo ren Interesting factoid (if they made a droid that spat out facts they would call it a factdroid in the Star Wars universe haha well I guess C3P0 is kind of a factdroid in a way): Kylo Ren's real name is Ben Solo, named after Obi Wan Kenobi (from the previous films, played by Sir Alec Guinness in the original trilogy, and then by Ewan McGregor in the prequels) whose nickname while on Tatooine was Ben Kenobi or Old Ben Kenobi. "Ben" in old Hebrew meant "son of," so really the name "Ben Solo" is literal: Son of Solo. Fascinating! What a twist that Ben Solo decides, in a complete appeal to the Dark Side of the Force, to murder his own father in cold blood! It's the exact opposite of what Luke does with his own father Darth Vader/Anakin Skywalker in Episode VI: Return of the Jedi, and parallel's Anakin's own dark decision to murder all those poor Younglings (Jedi children in training) in Episode III: Revenge of the Sith. It's so interesting that Kylo/Ben reveres Darth Vader, his own grandfather (!), not for his ultimate decision to save the universe from the rule of the tyrannical Sith, but for his initial pursuit in supporting the Sith. Given Kylo/Ben's clear commitment to the Dark Side, as evidenced by murdering his own father, the beloved Han Solo (played by Harrison Ford), I can't wait to find out whether he will face redemption, as his own grandfather did in the face of Luke's commitment to compassion, or damnation, as did Anakin's Sith master Emperor Palpatine/Darth Sidious. Does Kylo/Ben even know of Darth Vader's last act of defiance? What a crushing realization it will be for him to realize that all of his efforts, including murdering his own father, only brought him further misery and shame! Perhaps it will even prompt him to take such drastic action as Vader did when he killed Palpatine (hah please excuse this spoiler, folks), and betray his new master, Supreme Leader Snoke. Guess we'll have to wait for the new episodes in order to find out! tl;dr i'm gay
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Dec 18, 2015 18:24
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ive never seen any of the starwars movies but i have seen harrison ford wearing a faggy earring and so he has no credibility to made any requests of decent ppl e: or even of goons
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Dec 18, 2015 18:33
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whoflungpoop posted:ive never seen any of the starwars movies but i have seen harrison ford wearing a faggy earring and so he has no credibility to made any requests of decent ppl he was ok in the indian joe movie
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Dec 18, 2015 18:38
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Personally I don't see the enthusiasm as really all that important. All the movies that star wars has made aren't terrific or even near great. They were good for their time I guess but sci fi buddhism that is completely divorced from realism isn't all that interesting to me. Sethex fucked around with this message at 18:43 on Dec 18, 2015 |
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Dec 18, 2015 18:39
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Expected goatse voted 1
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Dec 18, 2015 18:40
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Parallax Scroll posted:wait how is his son a black guy its called getting a black woman pregnant you idiot
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Dec 18, 2015 18:41
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final2percent posted:Interesting factoid (if they made a droid that spat out facts they would call it a factdroid in the Star Wars universe haha well I guess C3P0 is kind of a factdroid in a way): I don't think the star wars galaxy has jewish people
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Dec 18, 2015 18:53
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final2percent posted:Interesting factoid (if they made a droid that spat out facts they would call it a factdroid in the Star Wars universe haha well I guess C3P0 is kind of a factdroid in a way): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IRsPheErBj8
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Dec 18, 2015 19:01
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Aralan posted:I don't think the star wars galaxy has jewish people https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Watto
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Dec 18, 2015 19:03
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im just gonna catch the h8f8l 8ight next week
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Dec 18, 2015 19:07
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Gas.
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Dec 18, 2015 19:16
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gently caress off op
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Dec 18, 2015 20:07
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Boyega, as a person, seems pretty cool       
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Dec 18, 2015 20:09
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cram me sideways posted:*star wars comes out* Ford: loving stupid alzheimer's
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Dec 18, 2015 20:11
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Broenheim posted:gently caress off op your movie sucks and your love for it sucks
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Dec 18, 2015 20:34
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Aren't spoiler alerts just a fancy way to say trigger warning?
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Dec 18, 2015 20:36
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cram me sideways posted:it has to embody such a large portion of their character and identity, and if they could get away with it, it'd be a loving religion. It is... http://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-29753530 http://www.jedichurch.org/ They're fighting to get it legally recognized. loving nerds.
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Dec 18, 2015 20:44
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Parallax Scroll posted:wait how is his son a black guy Yeahhh about that remember when Lando was visting him and Leia. Welll.....
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Dec 18, 2015 20:50
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So is Rey a jedi? I'd let her scavenge my battleship if you know what I mean 
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Dec 18, 2015 21:35
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Kyle is Han's son, not bdude
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Dec 18, 2015 22:03
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Booblord Zagats posted:Boyega, as a person, seems pretty cool owns as much irl as in the movie film
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Dec 18, 2015 23:27
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Volume posted:Aren't spoiler alerts just a fancy way to say trigger warning? yes that's exactly what they are along with NWS and NMS
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Dec 18, 2015 23:45
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Booblord Zagats posted:Boyega, as a person, seems pretty cool millenial thread is that way -->
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Dec 18, 2015 23:52
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cram me sideways posted:your movie sucks and your love for it sucks i havent even seen it nor probably will, its just that these threads are garbage
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Dec 19, 2015 00:00
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cram me sideways posted:your movie sucks and your love for it sucks they dumped the SW EU and it's a better movie for it, get over your precious fanfic
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Dec 19, 2015 00:37
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cram me sideways posted:*star wars comes out* Ford: loving stupid Lol
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Dec 19, 2015 00:58
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Despite being a pilot, he starred in "Air Force One", which was such a piece of poo poo with the most misleading aviation inaccuracies of any movie involving planes. So gently caress Harrison Ford.
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Dec 19, 2015 01:10
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airforce one owns bones. get off my plane, bitch
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Dec 19, 2015 01:13
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Anyone who smells like cherries can't be all that bad.
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Dec 19, 2015 01:14
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I still can't believe what a try-hard Boyega has been ever since the internet hate started for him. Does he have any redeeming qualities in the film? I'm waiting for my cam copy to download
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Dec 19, 2015 01:25
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