2015 Golden Wonderhangers Awards !! WINNERS ANNOUNCED !!

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Business, Finance, and Careers > 2015 Golden Wonderhangers Awards !! WINNERS ANNOUNCED !!

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Devian666: Aug 20, 2008; Take some advice Chris.; Fun Shoe

1B
2B*
3A
4B
5B
6A
7C

e: got around to picking worst with money.

Devian666 fucked around with this message at 04:33 on Jan 12, 2016

# ? Jan 11, 2016 20:34

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# ? Apr 25, 2024 13:36

Henrik Zetterberg: Dec 7, 2007

1A*
2B
3A
4B
5A
6A [assuming best means the one that makes me want to turn my computer off]
7C

Henrik Zetterberg fucked around with this message at 22:22 on Jan 12, 2016

# ? Jan 11, 2016 20:51

KYOON GRIFFEY JR: Apr 12, 2010; Runner-up, TRP Sack Race 2021/22

1A
2D
3A
4B
5B*
6C
7A

I remain hopeful that I'll be able to vote for houseboatserverfarm! In the 2016 edition.

# ? Jan 11, 2016 22:45

moana: Jun 18, 2005; one of the more intellectual satire communities on the web

1D*
2A
3A
4B
5C
6A
7C

# ? Jan 12, 2016 03:45

Barry: Aug 1, 2003; Hardened Criminal

1A
2C
3A
4B*
5B
6C
7C

# ? Jan 12, 2016 18:30

ExtrudeAlongCurve: Oct 21, 2010; Lambert is my Homeboy

1D
2D
3A
4B*
5A
6A
7D

# ? Jan 12, 2016 19:56

Nail Rat: Dec 29, 2000; You maniacs! You blew it up! God damn you! God damn you all to hell!!

1B
2A
3A*
4C
5A
6C
7C

# ? Jan 12, 2016 20:00

Weatherman: Jul 30, 2003; WARBLEKLONK

1C because I maintain A is a troll
2D
3A*
4B
5B
6C surely this is meant to be "worst loving derail"?
7B

# ? Jan 13, 2016 22:31

Isambard K. Brunel: Nov 2, 2011; ``...an explosion in the engine room ... would have destroyed a lesser ship''

1A - Blue Story is real, just is the worst at communication
2B* - Because a criminal record that young must surely compromise your financial future?
3A
4B
5B
6A
7D

e: wat are tags :derp:

# ? Jan 13, 2016 23:34

canyoneer: Sep 13, 2005; I only have canyoneyes for you

1B*
2A
3B
4B
5B
6A
7D

# ? Jan 14, 2016 00:30

Veskit: Mar 2, 2005; I love capitalism!! DM me for the best investing advice!

1C
2A
3A
4B
5B*
6A
7A

I wanted so god drat bad to pick G0lbez's crazy rear end scheme as the worst BWM but unfortunately Muerte came along with a dream and a cart and just delivered 6 miles of entertainment.

# ? Jan 14, 2016 00:47

Seppuku: May 24, 2004; Photo Of Crying Father A Lasting Symbol Of Economic Struggle If There Ever Was One

1A
2A
3C
4B*
5B
6C
7D

# ? Jan 14, 2016 19:34

Duckman2008: Jan 6, 2010; TFW you see Flyers goaltending.; Grimey Drawer

1B
2A
3A
4B
5A
6A
7C

The houseboats thread was one of the most ridiculous things I've read all year. Even over Blue Story.

# ? Jan 15, 2016 12:46

last laugh: Feb 11, 2004; NOOOTHING!

1b
2b
3a
4b
5b
6a
7a

# ? Jan 15, 2016 14:13

antiga: Jan 16, 2013

1A
2B
3B
4B*
5B
6C
7D

2 is a strong second place contender for worst with money but e trade guy wins it for me. Perfect example of idiot 'day trader' who gets exactly what he has coming, loses $150k on a position where his upside was a tenth of that. Crowd funding his negative balance is icing on the cake.

antiga fucked around with this message at 15:17 on Jan 15, 2016

# ? Jan 15, 2016 15:10

pig slut lisa: Mar 5, 2012; irl is good

Only a few more hours to vote in this meaningless contest that doesn't have any prizes!

# ? Jan 15, 2016 21:42

ntan1: Apr 29, 2009; sempai noticed me

1A
2B
3A
4B
5B*
6A
7C

# ? Jan 16, 2016 00:38

silvergoose: Mar 18, 2006; IT IS SAID THE TEARS OF THE BWEENIX CAN HEAL ALL WOUNDS

pig slut lisa posted:

Only a few more hours to vote in this meaningless contest that doesn't have any prizes!

It's just like Whose Line is it Anyway!

# ? Jan 16, 2016 02:56

flynt: Dec 30, 2006; Triggerhappy and gunshy

Duckman2008 posted:

The houseboats thread was one of the most ridiculous things I've read all year. Even over Blue Story.

I plan on voting for him in next year's contest after he actually buys the houseboat.

# ? Jan 16, 2016 03:31

pig slut lisa: Mar 5, 2012; irl is good

Ladies and gentlemen, I am happy to announce your inaugural Golden Wonderhanger winners!

The Biggest BFC trainwreck thread of 2015 was Blue Story! First nominated by Haifisch, this tale from a long time ago in Cascadia far away started out strong before disappointing and confusing many long-time fans. However, recent updates have shown that this franchise is simply too strong to ever peter out.
The Funniest Redditor was this year's most hotly contested category. Souvenir Checks garnered twelve votes, but thirteen voters chose the mindboggling tale of Insurance Fraud Foiled by Dashcam, first nominated by Mojo Threepwood.
Voters shed their dissension for Worst mainstream media article, with 26 choosing If You Have Savings In Your 20s, You�re Doing Something Wrong. This article was first nominated by Not a Children, who probably has never earned a $60,000 pay raise by ~~partying~~ networking at nightclubs.
26 voters also agreed on this year's Worst social media/crowdfunding/personal anecdote, handing the prize to
Help! My short position got crushed, and now I owe E-Trade $106,445.56! First nominated by Tyro, this winner may inspire frequent BWM thread posters to keep a closer eye on r/wallstreetbets in 2016.
Blue Story bounced around the forums this year but was unable to snag a second award as the Worst BWM from elsewhere on SA prize was handed to Muerte quits job to hike across America to raise money for mental health issues. Takes an Uber back home after 4 days. First nominated by flynt for worst crowdfunding, this submission steamrolled its way to victory with 23 votes.
The Best derail of the year was overwhelmingly determined to be Horse Chat. First nominated by Giant Isopod, this topic was subsequently nominated by a dozen people who wanted to make sure I had seen it, had I really seen it, here it is again. Will Horse Chat be able to defend its crown next year, with Powerball Chat already proving a strong challenger early in the year? Stay tuned for next year's contest!
The category awards concluded with a squeaker, as the Most eyerolling humblebrag went to _areaman tells us about his inexpensive wedding, decides we also need to know he makes $200K+ per year. First nominated by GoGoGadgetChris, this nomination was extra enjoyable once you realized it was _areaman's only post in the BWM thread since April. Thanks for stopping by, hope the wedding goes swell!
Finally, we reach the ne plus ultra of the Golden Wonderhangers, the Worst With Money grand prize! Competition was fierce for this award, with nearly half of all category nominations garnering at least one vote. In the end, however, a plurality of votes went to Help! My short position got crushed, and now I owe E-Trade $106,445.56! Did any of the other category winners really ever stand a chance against a Redditor?

Congrats to the winning nominators for having your finger on the pulse of BFC over the past year, and congrats to the winning nominees for providing endless entertainment. Without you, this forum would be a much duller place.

Thanks to Nail Rat and Slap Me Silly for your help with this. We aren't even out of January yet and I've already seen some strong contenders for next year's awards, so keep an eye out for the next generation of Golden Wonderhanger winners!

# ? Jan 16, 2016 06:01

SYSV Fanfic: Sep 9, 2003; by Pragmatica

Wow, I'm not nearly as BWM as I thought. Congratulations to the winners.

# ? Jan 16, 2016 10:03

Duckman2008: Jan 6, 2010; TFW you see Flyers goaltending.; Grimey Drawer

flynt posted:

I plan on voting for him in next year's contest after he actually buys the houseboat.

I'm starting my campaign now. Vote for houseboats for 2016 Wonderhangers!

# ? Jan 16, 2016 14:46

Aagar: Mar 30, 2006; E/N Gestapo
I am talking to a mod right now about getting you probated/banned/gassed

Update on Muerte: I didn't see it said anywhere in this thread, but looking at Muerte's post history, while detailing the extreme damage done to his car driving across America he mentions that he is going to retry his Walk Across America in March 2016. From the first link he has learned his lessons from his last "attempt":

Muerte posted:

I learned many things on my 5 day trip on what I did wrong and right. Here is a quick break down:

Right:
Socks
Shoes
Walking Poles
Tent
Hydration
Fitness (physically I had some bruises and a slightly sore knee which probably needs to be drained from when I broke it but it was nothing I couldn't handle)

Wrong:
Pack Weight
Cart
Nutrition (I could not eat for 5 days due to the feeling of puking anytime I looked at food)
Clothing (Too Heavy)
Having people invest in my trip (Although I'm incredibly thankful for everyone who helped in one way or another it put an extremely high amount of pressure on me to perform.)
Telling people my estimated completion time

I guess 4 days/25 miles in the SF state park was enough to teach him that 2,500 is totally doable? Hopefully he gets a better cart this time. Also, why March? Possibly cooler in the desert, but as he won't make it that far, I'd aim for warmer nights near the ranger station.

For best article, this one came in just shy of 2015, but I'll keep it in mind for next year. I can't actually read it all the way through - it sounds like one gigantic rationalization of why "The Big Short" isn't really correct because you see there was a lot of stuff going on and...

# ? Jan 17, 2016 16:46