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Captain Foo
May 11, 2004

we vibin'
we slidin'
we breathin'
we dyin'

stay safe computer snyping ghost

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Smythe
Oct 12, 2003

angry_keebler posted:

you yank the power strip from the wall to kill the ps4, and as the screen goes black an ominous knocking begins to reverberate through your house. like a man possessed you storm down the hallway trying to find the source of the maddening knell.

with a sudden sinking feeling you realize the sound is coming from your computer room. as you crack open the door you see your monster gaming rig is gone, replaced by an oculus rift plugged in to a black laptop with a skull decal on the back covering up the glowing alienware logo

you slip on the headset and are transported to a vision of the future. your neighbor is laying dead in a pile plumbing tools and his cripple kid is ululating before he touches off a suicide bomb hidden in his very futuristic hover wheelchair. it turns out those fbi warnings you ignored were right all along; downloading a copy of ant-man was all the terrorists needed to recruit a sad neglected kid and turn him into the ultimate terror weapon.

the view dissolves and with a lurching motion that nearly makes you puke. you're transported to a dreary graveside service. two figures holding glowing umbrellas and wearing bright pastel metallic jumpsuits are crying next to a robot wearing a priest's paper collar. overcoming the nausea you realize it's your kid brother and his wife, only they look like they've aged 60 years. a sudden flash from the overcast sky shows the headstone in stark contrast

and oh no, they're burying you! that's right! if you don't fix your lowdown ways then on christmas day, 2072, you're going to die

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