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a neat cape
Feb 22, 2007

Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!
...The party's over. For twenty teams, anyway. Talk about our dumb bad teams and what they could possibly do to not become bad eight months from now.

OFFSEASON TOPICS

-Race for Los Angeles: The Chargers, Raiders, and Rams are all expected to file for relocation tomorrow. The owners meetings will take place in Houston on January 12th and 13th, culminating in a vote. It's currently believed that Spanos and Davis have the votes needed to block Kroenke from moving, and vice versa. SHOULD BE FUN.

-I dunno the first topic is the only one I'm interested in.

SCHEDULE:

January 4th: Application for relocation opens
January 12th/13th: NFL Owners meetings in Houston.
January 23rd: East-West Shrine game
January 30th: Senior Bowl

February 22nd: First day teams can apply franchise/transition tags
February 23rd-29th: NFL Combine in Indianapolis

March 15th: New league year and free agency opens

April 4th: Teams with new head coaches may begin offseason workouts
April 18th: Teams with returning head coaches may begin offseason workouts
April 28th-30th: 2016 NFL Draft

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Chris James 2
Aug 9, 2012


I'd say "the Ravens should be better next season because they couldn't possibly have that bad injury luck again", but then I remember Giants fans have been lying to themselves with nearly the exact same sentence for 3 full years in a row now

I'd say "at least we have a backup plan just in case", but then I remember it's literally just Mallett. Schaub's probably gone, Clausen's definitely gone. And yet this would still be preferable to the possibility of drafting a backup I swear on my loving life I'll be a Browns fan if the Ravens draft Hackenberg

So positives: Steve Smith's coming back and might not be IR'd this time!, Harbaugh's still around!, Nobody committed a major crime this season!, I continue to be right about this poo poo division!, Still not the most dysfunctional team in said poo poo division!, and Swept the Steelers!

C+ season

The 7th Guest
Dec 17, 2003

He literally doesnt give a gently caress lol

quote:

ESPN Cleveland's Bruce Hooley was told by colleague Tony Grossi that Johnny Manziel showed up to the Browns' facility "disheveled and inebriated" earlier in the week.

Intruder
Mar 5, 2003

That av is going to take some getting used to, I'm not going to know who you are for like a month

The 7th Guest
Dec 17, 2003

What the heck san diego.

Rotoworld posted:

Impending free agent FS Eric Weddle told reporters on Monday that he may never speak to the Chargers' organization again.

Weddle said he's looking for the "right fit" in free agency, and a "chance to win a title." Weddle, who was placed on injured reserve two weeks ago, said Monday there is "no doubt" he was healthy enough to play in Sunday's finale against Denver.

Metapod
Mar 18, 2012
The offseason of hope and mystery begins again for Tennessee!!! Lets see how this ends in misery again

Febreeze
Oct 24, 2011

I want to care, butt I dont
The Giants are a bad team and I'm pumped to watch Eli get stuck with a new o-coordinator that fucks up his chemistry right as he's gotten good in the new system and then he'll slowly fail for a few remaining years while OBJ gets hurt and leaves like all young promising Giants wide receivers.

got any sevens
Feb 9, 2013

by Cyrano4747

Quest For Glory II posted:

What the heck san diego.

I hope The Chargers implode this offseason during the LA move like the niners did last year.

Gatts
Jan 2, 2001

Goodnight Moon

Nap Ghost
gently caress the Browns. Bring on the draft and comedy.

Gyro Zeppeli
Jul 19, 2012

sure hope no-one throws me off a bridge

effectual posted:

I hope The Chargers implode this offseason during the LA move like the niners did last year.

The wheels are going to fall off somewhere around Carlsbad.

Mind_Taker
May 7, 2007



Febreeze posted:

The Giants are a bad team and I'm pumped to watch Eli get stuck with a new o-coordinator that fucks up his chemistry right as he's gotten good in the new system and then he'll slowly fail for a few remaining years while OBJ gets hurt and leaves like all young promising Giants wide receivers.

Same, but unironically.

FUCKFACE MORON
Apr 23, 2010

by sebmojo
http://profootballtalk.nbcsports.com/2015/12/21/could-the-raiders-eventually-land-in-san-diego/

Gyro Zeppeli
Jul 19, 2012

sure hope no-one throws me off a bridge


This is absolutely the darkest timeline.

No Irish Need Imply
Nov 30, 2008
Why are there two N/V threads?

Chris James 2
Aug 9, 2012


Atticus Finch posted:

Why are there two N/V threads?

1 for losers, 1 for winners. Why would the winners want to be tainted with Ravens, Chargers, Browns, etc talk

a neat cape
Feb 22, 2007

Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!

Atticus Finch posted:

Why are there two N/V threads?

One's an offseason thread for non playoff teams. So, bye.

Chris James 2
Aug 9, 2012


You can come back Sunday, Atticus

Intruder
Mar 5, 2003

Quest For Glory II posted:

What the heck san diego.

The Chargers went super antagonistic with Weddle to finish the season/his career there for... reasons? I don't get it at all

Also edited the thread title to make it more clear

computer parts
Nov 18, 2010

PLEASE CLAP
The Lions went 7-9 this year, but are 6-2 after the Bye and firing the OC in favor of Jim Bob Cooter (would've been 7-1 if not for a last second Hail Mary).

It doesn't feel bad enough for firings, but I think 8-9 wins might be the team's ceiling right now. I guess we wait till next season.

Blitz of 404 Error
Sep 19, 2007

Joe Biden is a top 15 president

Jesus gently caress

a neat cape
Feb 22, 2007

Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!

Intruder posted:

The Chargers went super antagonistic with Weddle to finish the season/his career there for... reasons? I don't get it at all

Also edited the thread title to make it more clear

No one gets it. There's no reason. gently caress John Spanos.

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!

Blitz7x posted:

Jesus gently caress

That is just 100% Mike Florio stupid speculation.

a neat cape
Feb 22, 2007

Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!
That said, the Raiders moving to San Diego would be utterly hilarious.

Chris James 2
Aug 9, 2012


Raiders to San Diego
Chargers to Oakland
Rams to LA

a neat cape
Feb 22, 2007

Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!
Michael Gehlken ‏@UTgehlken 1h1 hour ago

Eric Weddle said he probably won't get reason why past couple weeks went as they did "because I probably won't ever speak to them again."

lol

FUCKFACE MORON
Apr 23, 2010

by sebmojo
I really do like the sound of San Diego Raiders

Chris James 2 posted:

You can come back Sunday, Atticus
lmao

Shangri-Law School
Feb 19, 2013

Chris James 2 posted:

Raiders to San Diego
Chargers to Oakland
Rams to LA

Raiders to St. Louis
Rams to San Diego
Chargers to LA
Seahawks to Anaheim
Seattle to Bottom of Volcanic Ash Pile

C-Euro
Mar 20, 2010

:science:
Soiled Meat

computer parts posted:

The Lions went 7-9 this year, but are 6-2 after the Bye and firing the OC in favor of Jim Bob Cooter (would've been 7-1 if not for a last second Hail Mary).

It doesn't feel bad enough for firings, but I think 8-9 wins might be the team's ceiling right now. I guess we wait till next season.

No idea what to expect from the team this offseason. The main selling point of the Caldwell regime is the good coordinators so I don't want him gone because we'd lose those, but then Austin might get hired somewhere else which makes it easier to boot Caldwell, but then gently caress no don't jump into this terrible coaching search later than everyone else, but then we might jump in late anyway if the new GM doesn't like Caldwell and ughhhh. It will be entertaining one way or another, at least for a while.

Also according to Glover Quin, Jim's message going into this offseason was "Stay out of trouble". Not bad advice but :lol: there's our veteran leader.

Durandal1707
Oct 11, 2013

Intruder posted:

The Chargers went super antagonistic with Weddle to finish the season/his career there for... reasons? I don't get it at all

Weddle had a bitter contract dispute with management and his agent furthermore commented on twitter about the poor performances some of the other Charger players who had received big deals this last offseason relative to Weddle. (such as Brandon Flowers) Mind you, Weddle still didn't deserve the petty bullshit that the Spanos family pushed on him to end his time with the Chargers. (former Charger players have also commented on the Spanoses' despicable behaviour, like Quentin Jammer and I believe Randy McMichael)

The Spanos family are secretly pretty awful people, you just have to look up how guys like Junior Seau, Ladanian Tomlinson, Darren Sproles to name a select few players were ushered out to realize that's what they've been like all along.

a neat cape
Feb 22, 2007

Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!
Junior and Tomlinson actually love the spanoses. Their major issue was with AJ Smith.

There's a reason that Tomlinson had nothing to do with the Chargers organization until AJ was fired.

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!
I don't think Junior loves much of anything these days.

a neat cape
Feb 22, 2007

Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!
You know what I mean, rear end in a top hat

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!
I mean, I bet it was a helluva suit they buried him in.

Durandal1707
Oct 11, 2013
I thought Junior had a problem with them because he didn't hear that he was getting dealt to Miami from management. My bad.

Still, as an org they've always parted with players in a really... nasty manner. I know it's pro football and that sort of thing is unavoidable, but even still.

ZenVulgarity
Oct 9, 2012

I made the hat by transforming my zen

NC-17 posted:

I don't think Junior loves much of anything these days.

Do to the winners thread you pats gently caress

Chris James 2
Aug 9, 2012


Kirios
Jan 26, 2010




Yeah I honestly don't see how people can still be Browns fans.

Beautiful Ninja
Mar 26, 2009

Five time FCW Champion...of my heart.

Kirios posted:

Yeah I honestly don't see how people can still be Browns fans.

You might want to look up Battered Person Syndrome.

sirtommygunn
Mar 7, 2013



There were 13 teams in the NFL with winning records. The only one of those teams that didn't make the playoffs are the Jets. :smith:

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C-Euro
Mar 20, 2010

:science:
Soiled Meat

How come they always end up playing Pittsburgh in week 17? I know that week is always divisional matchups but there's two other teams in the AFCN you guys.

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