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shadow puppet of a posted:Two part Reality Check with Slezak and Melinda is pretty good. Lots and lots of shade cast on Jlo. At some point this season Slezak was going to break from the script and get real, and it's so great to see it happening so early. So what's going on? We're down to one show a week on Thursdays (finally!) and the general belief is that there is no judges' save this year, which makes sense given the time crunch they're already under. What is unknown is if any sort of Twitter save is going to be implemented. Frankly, let's hope not. We're going from 10 to 2 in 5 weeks. The easy math says we're getting double eliminations this week and the next, with single eliminations weekly thereafter. This is so boring and I don't know why I'm writing it. Anyway song spoilers - keep in mind they will only sing for votes if they haven't been eliminated, so our eliminations this year will presumably be a la Jax's unceremonious dumping from last season, with no goodbye performances. Which is an improvement, all told. So, in order of my personal power rankings: Sonika Vaid: Since You Been Gone (Kelly Clarkson) Smart choice assuming she can pull it off. Which she can. La’Porsha Renae: Halo (Beyonce) Played out song, but let's see if she can kill it with the bar set way higher. Avalon Young: Earned It (The Weeknd) – Staying in her lane but could be a breakthrough moment if she nails it. Dalton Rapattoni: Radioactive (Imagine Dragons) – Pitch doesn't really matter in this song so it's perfect for Cloud. MacKenzie Bourg: I Wanna Dance with Somebody (Whitney Houston) – There's no way he doesn't make this boring. Lee Jean: Use Somebody (Kings of Leon) – Hoo boy I like Lee but no way does he have the range for that song. Trent Harmon: When a Man Loves a Woman (Percy Sledge) – I'd rather hear Michael Bolton's cover again. Tristan McIntosh: Go Rest High on That Mountain (Vince Gill) – This dirge compressed to 90 seconds? She's toast. Olivia Rox: Trouble (P!nk) – This might be the only P!nk song that Liv could credibly pull off. Assuming she sings. Gianna Isabella: If I Ain’t Got You by Alicia Keys – If she isn't eliminated tomorrow, she will be next week for sure. Does anyone care about song spoilers in the year 2016? I'm not using spoiler tags going forward unless someone objects. See y'all sometime on Friday
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Mar 2, 2016 21:55
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Tomorrow is when Gianna the fraud goes home. Didn't realize nothing was on tonight until I searched my chance listing.
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Mar 3, 2016 03:28
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Anya posted:Tomorrow is when Gianna the fraud goes home. Must be so strange for you being totally new to the Idol franchise here at the very end. Since time is a flat circle, Gianna is going to Lazero Arbos her way through the bubble singers and not leave that stage until she has taken out at least one of the frontrunners. Probably La'Porsha.
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Mar 3, 2016 06:15
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shadow puppet of a posted:Must be so strange for you being totally new to the Idol franchise here at the very end. Lazaro didn't take out any frontrunners though. Here you'll want to be thinking about Jason Castro.
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Mar 3, 2016 07:51
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Actually, I base that on a highly unscientific poll I saw on an AI fan site, where she was the bottom rank. So, there is hope from the unwashed masses to do the right thing. Sonika was 1, LaPorsha 2, Mackenzie 3, Dalton 4.
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Mar 3, 2016 16:43
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shadow puppet of a posted:Must be so strange for you being totally new to the Idol franchise here at the very end. Called it. Glad to see Olivia go as well. I had high hopes initially from auditions but she seemed to fade into being a teenager as the weeks went on. La Porsha and Trent as my top two this week. I missed Sonika as I was in the laundry room, but it seemed okay from there. Mackenzie, LeeViJeansJr could have been better. First bad Dalton performance of the year. Tristan was surprisingly better, she may squeak to top six after all. I wasn't impressed with Avalon, but she was better than Gianna and Olivia.
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Mar 4, 2016 04:28
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How could we make the show even more worthless and disrespectful towards the contestants and the audience? We already used judge's choice, but it's still not hit rock bottom. It's not enough that we spend every waking movent lingering on Scott Barffatty, we still have a show run it into the ground. I know. Let's let the judges themselves perform the night the contestants are performing, oh and if that's not lovely enough, let's invite some random motherfuckers to sing in the middle of a performance night. Contestants, if you didn't get the message, then you bitches are utterly expendable. Who wants to see you in this show?
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Mar 4, 2016 23:24
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Good to see the show open with two millionaires taking that Ford music video money out of the hands of a single mom. Keep doing you Idol. I still dislike Gianna but that belted pantsuit with the intercontinental title belt is  and Dye-job La'Porsha is a greasepaint face-lighting bolt away channeling Sensational Sherri. I love it.Dalt Rap: Arrangement is like a weary city bus and Dalton is as tinny as a kid using Beats headphones as speakers. I grip my transfer in irritation. Lee OrangeTabs: Weak as a thirty second herbal teabag dropped in sub-boiling water. That axe is killing him. Harry's far-below-bemused face says it all. Go home Lee. Here is a transfer to help get you there. Ugh, who let Demi in the building. This is just a poor tease of the Peoples's Nation vs Folk Nation battle-lines decades long war that was supposed to be XFUSA vs. Idol. And its still your fault we never go that, Steve Jones. Thanksgiving in Mary Land! Sonika Vaid: Must have been rude to someone in the hair dept. Not a season-winners performance. Bummer. Ma Bou: Idol apparently saving money by just handing Lee and Ma Bou the same photocopied sheet of staging directions. Boring. Backup singer doing all the heavy lifting in a song that should be a one person job. I can't hear ma Bou for 55% of the song. That probably breaks union rules. La'Porsha: Probably smartly made a big show of politely declining a Since You Been Gone-type song suggestion from Borchy. She did a good job, remains as frontrunner. PassBoy now BotoxBoy: Big Bill Burr vibes from nu-face Trent. Did a decent job on the face control for most of the song. I enjoyed the vocal until that ending g g g g. As predicted Tristan go through for reasons entirely not related to songness. Probably already has post-show endorsements lined up. Took zero chances out there. Not entirely likely to pay off unless the last contestant Lee Jean's it tonight. Avvie: Mugging hard fro the camera, perhaps Avs is done sandbagging and transforms into a vocal shark next week now that there is sufficient Lee Jean-flavored chum in the water. ORox: Clearly on point about being in trouble. Song choice from hell. An old fashioned bus-undering. Bless you Ghost of Nigel. Good note at the end though. IC Titleholder: Opened ok'er than I expected but went back into mumble-voice on the verse. A go-home performance, surely in a 3 person, 1 choice field. A market-priced set of Gianna MP3's would be 100% eaten by transaction fees. Heyy the judges made the right choice. Good one, show. Now watch them save Lee Jean next week.
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Mar 5, 2016 00:24
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Highlight of last night is Levi Strauss whipping his guitar around and swinging the mic like he just don't care. Most awkward transition ever. Now that Gianna is done, I can relax. Anyone of these idiots can win and I'm excited to see how obnoxious their styling will continue to go from here. I'm going to change to a LaPorsha-Trent final with a *gasp* shocking Tristan elimination from the top four as she screams teeny bopper country heart throb that just ain't happening. Dalton will bow out from the top three - kid has the biggest social media following and he is going to milk that for all its worth. Lee and Avalon gone next week.
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Mar 5, 2016 01:35
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AMERICAN IDOL - TOP 10 PERFORMANCE (2 ELIMINATED) So it turns out we're going to hear everyone sing, but the bottom 3 will have one person survive. I don't yet know how that's going to shake out or why but on the other hand I'm just hosed up enough to enjoy watching Idol and have to sleep soon so I can go caucus for Bernie Sanders in a few hours. I guess we're getting Demi Lovato and Harry singing which will be good hopefully. Sorry they're recapping "Piece By Piece" and I'm not feeling like losing my poo poo again. Got idiots to make fun of, y'all. Seacrest just come out already bro. No one is going to not support you. Okay so the judges are going to make the choice of the Bottom 3. So this is now literally The Voice. Way to pass the torch that has already absconded thee, Idol. Grammys theme is nebulous as can be imagined, obviously. Dalton Rapattoni, "Radioactive" (-9.5/10) - I've been telling you he's a total fraud from the jump. All he did here was prove me right. His overemoting comes off as crazed or perhaps otherwise addled. This was downright embarrassing. The audience doesn't know better than to lukewarmly support the judges' sublimely subtle eviscerations. That combined with his placement in the death slot tells me the producers are bored with their new toy. Lee Jean, "Use Somebody" (5.25/10) - So noncommittal that even the audience isn't buying it. Someone got inside his head about competing with MacKenzie and it's got him shook. This was so stale and dismal that it never came within an ICBM's shot of lukewarm. He didn't gently caress up at all but he's almost certainly gone barring further catastrophies. Demi Lovato ft/Idol XV Women, "Confident/other songs" (hahaha gently caress/10) - Tristan and Olivia embarrassed themselves something fierce, Sonika tricked me into thinking she was Demi, and La'Porsha didn't get to close her phrase. Then we get the Demi solo and it's desperate and aping Adele ca. 5 years ago, and shouting and horrible. I love Demi but this tested that and mostly failed. Christ. Sonika Vaid, "Since You Been Gone" (-6/10) - Ohhhhh no. Implodes in the way I always worried Jena Irene would. Just awful. The judges pile on hard. What is going on tonight? MacKenzie Bourg, "I Wanna Dance with Somebody" (0/10) - Twenty years later, two CPAs who are seeking out their pasts to try and explain their mutual, inexplicable love of pastel paint. They learn that they are the bastard children of MacKenzie Bourg. With Harry Connick Jr's voice in their heads, they hold hands and repress their mutual attraction into intestinal discomfort. This is the most interesting thing that happens "during" this performance, La’Porsha Renae, "Halo"" (2.5/10) - WHOA. WHoa. Off the beat by a quarter beat for the opening half. Sharp outside her vibrato? Breathless? This is where I gave up for the night/weekend but rewatched for a missing grade. She's officially going for a Bey/Rihanna combo and it's not working at all. The a capella segment was downright bad. Very underwhelming but ultimately won't hurt her any. I stand by my assertion that she's already peaked, yet still expect her to win the season. Idol's first few seasons were about making stars out of nobodies. The last 11 seasons have been about making nobodies famous for a hot minute. Harry Connick Jr. ft/Idol XV Dudes, "I Do Like We Do" (jesus h christ/10) Harry invalidates his criticism of contestants' pitch by loving up literally every note of his own song. Like seriously. This was interminable and lovely in equal measure. He jokes about La'Porsha being amazing because this is a love-in with exactly one contestant in mind, one whose stock is rapidly falling. Trent Harmon, "When a Man Loves a Woman" (-7/10) - Shouts out of sync from the jump. Is Gmaj really the right key for this song? Because it's not his sweet spot at all. No emotional connection at all and works in a gimmick to showcase his poo poo-awful falsetto. Breaks down at the end of the song, and if it isn't because he knew how bad he just poo poo the bed then I don't know why. Jennifer is loving hammered and can't stop cooing during Harry and Keith's time. Jennifer is Paula Abdul-level wasted and it's not a good look. It's downright uncomfortable. Tristan McIntosh, "Go Rest High on That Mountain" (4.5/10) - Starts out super rough, then once she's in full voice she's overdoing the vibrato but is thisclose to correct pitch. Botches every big note. Should be going home soon. Can't emphasize enough that this was a terrible song choice. Jennifer Lopez is loving drunk as gently caress and it is horrible to watch. Harry's too drunk to not make a tasteless joke about her grandfather's broken back. My soul is dying. BOTTOM 3 PERFORM FOR JUDGES' SAVE First of all, why are we bothering? Just advance Avalon and send the crowd home happy. Avalon Young, "Earned It" (3/10) - Whisper-quiet and tone-deaf to start and pushes away from her wheelhouse with the inexplicable decision to go an octave down from the original while also going to Cmaj. This could have been a home run but ended up a base on balls at best. Olivia Rox, "Trouble" (-8.75/10) - Big voice moves only work if you nail the pitch. She didn't. This was embarrassing at every turn. J.Lo calls her false and the audience has zero reaction. Bye Liv. Gianna Isabella, "If I Ain’t Got You by Alicia Keys" (-10/10) - Sounds just like Alicia Keys performing this song live -- which is to say, lovely. Grats to the backup singers who killed it. Bye Gianna. Avalon makes it. Duh. faaaaaarrrrrtttt
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Mar 8, 2016 10:15
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The Top 6 theme is The American Idol Songbook. Which is to say, the songs that have been performed on Idol the most.  We've finally hit the bottom of the barrel for theme nights. Wouldn't it be a much better idea to perform songs that have never been done? Y'know, the literal opposite of this idea? Wait I think they did that one year. Who cares.Personally hoping for any of the following: Radiohead's "Creep", preferably performed with wild-eyed misguided confidence by Dalton Phil Collins's "Against All Odds" by Macklebourg would be dope Gavin DeGraw's "I Don't Wanna Be" gasped by Lee Jean on his way out the door Aerosmith's "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing" sweated out by Trent and his godawful falsetto "And I Am Telling You That I'm Not Going" is p much a given for La'Porsha and I'll be surprised if she does anything else (besides "I Have Nothing" which would be hilarious) Janis Joplin's "Piece of My Heart" could make for a terrific nu-metal interpretation by Sonika Sam Cooke's "A Change is Gonna Come" underwhelmingly pushed out by Avalon Badfinger's "Without You" to put the diarrhea icing on the lovely cake that has been Tristan's Idol Journey All or none of these could happen but I hope I get at least one. No power rankings this week because everyone sucked. SHVPS4DETH fucked around with this message at 21:10 on Mar 8, 2016 |
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Mar 8, 2016 21:08
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Catching up (in the UK), just had MacKenzie, and holy poo poo is everyone terrible tonight. Flat, out of breath, and looking completely unconvinced by their own mannerisms; Demi Lovato, on a very bad day, has out-performed all of them to an embarrassing degree. At least MacKenzie's guitar is actually plugged in. Lookin' at you, Lee Jean. Is anyone even attempting to pretend that anybody other than La'Porsha (voice) and Dalton (Fantasy Boyfriend Idol) have a chance? It's like every single person involved with this show has just given up. edit: holy  Harry Connick. loving state of it. That right there is a man who truly can not be hosed and is only going through the motions in the most base, minimum way possible.
pressedbunny fucked around with this message at 22:04 on Mar 8, 2016 |
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Mar 8, 2016 21:48
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pressedbunny posted:Is anyone even attempting to pretend that anybody other than La'Porsha (voice) and Dalton (Fantasy Boyfriend Idol) have a chance? It's like every single person involved with this show has just given up. Sonika made a very strong case for being a spoiler last week and I honestly doubt Dalton will sniff the finale (and not just as a matter of personal preference). I strongly suspect that this will end up being a bit of a bye week for contenders and fully expect Lee and Tristan to go home, but honestly I wouldn't be surprised if Dalton is our annual shock elimination that hasn't actually happened since Pia Toscano. Also it's not really shocking because he is the drizzling shits.
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Mar 9, 2016 09:54
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I was feeling Dalton would sneak his way in to the final up until last week. That was a horrible performance by him but was it enough to distract his legion of teeny boppers? Lee is definitely gone this week. I wish Avalon or Tristan as well.
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Mar 9, 2016 18:14
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Don't get me wrong, I think Dalton's 'singing' is the drizzling shits, but Idol has a strong history with young, white, somewhat-pretty guys with unremarkable voices going the distance. Lee DeWyze won, for gently caress sake.
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Mar 9, 2016 22:14
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I'd love to see Idol rehash Lambert v. Allen in a watered down store-brand colas face off between Dalton and Mackenzie.
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Mar 9, 2016 22:42
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pressedbunny posted:Lee DeWyze won, for gently caress sake. True. But you could say a version of that for most seasons after the Davids. Hell off the top of my head only Candice and Kris actually deserved to win their seasons outright. Caleb had it locked from the jump but he was a shithead and Jena made for a better story. I couldn't tell you who finished third that season. Alex Preston maybe? Goddamn was that guy strange. Emblematic of that season really. But yeah other than him lots of third place finishers were the best of their seasons. Melinda, Haley, Jax last season, Joshua Ledet (this might be a bit of a stretch) shadow puppet of a posted:I'd love to see Idol rehash Lambert v. Allen in a watered down store-brand colas face off between Dalton and Mackenzie. But I think we can all agree this would be the worst possible outcome.
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Mar 9, 2016 23:54
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A true WG duel. And the producers will be killing themselves.
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Mar 10, 2016 01:40
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Anya posted:A true WG duel. And the producers will be killing themselves. Last season finale was WGWG vs WGWG and it was a total nonstarter in every way A second year in a row will give them XFUSA-level infamy
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Mar 10, 2016 03:01
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BUT WE NEED ANOTHER KELLY CLARKSON TO TOP IT OFFFFFFFF
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Mar 10, 2016 12:00
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 Be prepared....
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Mar 10, 2016 15:02
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Song spoilers for tonight: Dalton Rapattoni: "Eleanor Rigby" by the Beatles - Expecting the Godhead version (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z_YyGw-gyL0 for reference) Avalon Young: "P.Y.T." by Michael Jackson - uhhhhm? This is a pretty sharp turn for Avalon. Maybe it's what she needs to push for the Top 4? Tristan McIntosh: "A Broken Wing" by Martina McBride - Kill me now. This is going to be horrific. MacKleBourg: "You Are So Beautiful" by Joe Cocker - How can he possibly make this song more boring and lovely? We'll find out soon! Trent Harmon: "Stand By Me" by Ben E. King - Trent's song choices continue to astound. What kind of artist does he want to be? Sonika Vaid: "I Have Nothing" by Whitney Houston - I love her but I can't believe this is the hill she wants to die on. Lee Jean: [probably] "Imagine" by the Beatles - The only unconfirmed song ("A well-known Beatles song") but it doesn't matter. It's Lee. La’Porsha Renae: [probably] "It’s a Man’s Man’s Man's World" by James Brown - They could have given us a fresh face with a unique identity in La'Porsha and instead they're sticking to formula and having her stand on the shoulders of everyone with a big voice who has come before her. I think that's what I find so disappointing. This is just so expected. And our duets! La’Porsha Renae & Trent Harmon: "See You Again" by Wiz Khalifa - Trent is going to get in her way something fierce. Their tones are like oil and water. Tristan McIntosh & Lee Jean: “I Don’t Want To Miss A Thing” by Aerosmith - Team Going Home will most certainly underwhelm. Avalon Young & Sonika Vaid : "Rise Up" by Andra Day - Very busy lyrically, not really in either's wheelhouse. Could be a cool surprise and they've paired my season faves. Dalton Rapattoni & MacKenzie Bourg: "I Want it That Way" by Backstreet Boys -   This has all the markings of the worst ever episode of Idol. Maybe with lowered expectations we can enjoy ourselves? nope
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Mar 10, 2016 21:30
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SHUPS 4 DETH posted:But I think we can all agree this would be the worst possible outcome. SHUPS 4 DETH posted:Dalton Rapattoni & MacKenzie Bourg: "I Want it That Way" by Backstreet Boys -
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Mar 10, 2016 21:33
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Top 8! Pity they didnt do an "I am" wordcloud for Seacrest. Hard to describe that guy in 3 words. Jlo is wearing a pretty remarkable hoochie dress that moves like overalls. Maybe she plans on hitting a buffet later. Good for her to pick somewhere Casper can afford to pay his share. I'll be so happy to see the last of Keith and his one look. La'rent: I am looking forward to this. Trent face return early. Was there a harmony in there? I not technical enough to know why that wasn't pleasant. Also the original song seemed to be garbage. Avika: Like a relay of nearly dropped batons that manages to finish well after anyone cared. Not good but lets continue to go after these awful song choices. Daourg: "I excel at bringing the edge" is a horrible misuse of two well established and clear terms. Aw gently caress MacBou for insisting on keeping his lame rear end guitar. its karaoke tv, drop your loving security blanket. Underwhelming from both. Shameful waste of high-cheese fun potential. Ma's voice is weak as gently caress and Dalton is singing this like Kevin who only ever gave 5% of the vocal oomph to any song. D - -. Trisee: What the hell happened at the beginning of the first "I don't want to close my eyes" fire that cellist/guitarist! Otherwise bleah. No more duets from anyone ever please. La'Porsha: Another good week for belts. Slezak and Melinda wanted her to get away from the in-place operatic spotlight performances. This is pretty amazing if only to see how far from that this is. And housekeys for earrings. Wonderful. Not the best, but fun. Kris Allen: Ready to attack him for being his boring predictable self but parts of this were lovely. Parts. Kid knows his shtick. Wow Nick Fraudini is in the house. I feel like somewhere out there a bunch of valet cars are going unparked. Maybe a little shout out to Alison Iraheta tonight as she is visible this week? No? Fine. This song could use another layer of metaphor. Its sitting a half step from "When I gently caress you" HorseBoy: I imagine this is what wheat germ tastes like. Bland. Tristan: Good in some of the belty parts, not in the whisper-sing parts. Dalton: The worst. I though this emo crap died when Timberlake bought part of Myspace. Vocal is garbage on top of crap everything else. They couldn't find some remotely goth chairs? I guess its in keeping with the whole Highschool talent show vibe. Well staged in that case. I can almost makeout the gymnasium of cafeteria tables that fold into the walls through the occasion-rented fog machine. Terrible that Sonika might be going home after watching D-alt lay his mascara-painted egg out there. Avalon: Lacking any zing in this oil-vinegar salad dressing composition. Must know she's going home so surprising that she'd not take a bigger swing at it. Cool to the end I suppose. Be you Avalon. Also, there is no polite way of saying this but now-23-year-old Alison doing graceful body rolls is really hot. Rocker, call me. I have nothing at all to offer, but you seem to have a knack for making something good out of disappointment. Lee: Not doing a good job of shaking that weeks-past-expiry feel he emits. Disappoints huge on the most important 'be' notes. Make it stop. If just Lee is saved we riot. I'm skipping the rest of this. Sonika: Seems to me to be a save-worthy performance. But shaky where you'd expect. Heyyy... good choice Judges. shadow puppet of a fucked around with this message at 23:41 on Mar 11, 2016 |
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Mar 11, 2016 23:38
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Top 8 and they still use Judge's Choice? At this point I can just laugh at the show and how the producers are doing everything in their power to screw it up. PS: Seacrest is the only thing about this show that isn't turned to poo poo. He's been professional as ever and by all accounts a genuinely good guy. Countdown to how somehow they do turn him into poo poo: 3... 2... 1... pigdog fucked around with this message at 20:25 on Mar 12, 2016 |
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Mar 12, 2016 20:20
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AMERICAN IDOL XV - TOP 8 PERFORM/TOP 6 REVEALED tonight's post is brought to you by Lagunitas Undercover Shut-Down Ale, a dank bubbler, and Bernie Sanders The worst theme week in the worst season of the worst show. Seacrest be with you. He's wearing a Cowell-esque deep v and it's uhhh. It's Friday night and I don't want to do this at all. EXHIBITION ROUND Producers' Delight (Trent Harmon & La’Porsha Renae), “See You Again” (4/10) - Trent's falsetto is fuckin horrible again. La'Porsha is mostly staying out of his way since the voice coaches noticed that their EQ profiles and tones are basically identical. The background singers do most of the hard work. Not bad but also not much of anything. Jennifer is drunk as gently caress already, as one must be to willingly put on that pink halter-jumper-overalls-whatever-the-gently caress that is. Charisma and the 'Brows (Sonika Vaid & Avalon Young), “Rise Up” (4.5/10) - Avalon starts off iffy. Sonika is doing perfectly well but Avalon is dragging things down big time. Okay Sonika is straight up dunking on her but to be fair Avalon's low register has never been strong and the arrangement is locking her down there and favoring Sonika a bit unfairly. Duets remain a bad idea for Idol. Clean-shaven Scott Borchetta is somehow slimier-looking than goatee'd Scott Borchetta. The Final Two (Dalton Rapattoni & MacKleBourg), “I Want It That Way” (-7/10) - Just... no. So boring and bad. Harry tears late 90s pop treacle a new rear end in a top hat. Keith did something but I forgot. Jennifer panders to the pubescent set. Dalt and MacK look like a yaoi emo fantasy of Trey Parker and Matt Stone come to life. I want to die. The Bottom Two (Tristan McIntosh & Lee Jean), “I Don’t Want To Miss A Thing” (-8/10) - Tristan gets the better of the arrangement but still lowers the bar. And then at the top of the chorus the drunk keyboard player misses by three keys and throws off everyone's intonation. And then it happens again at the end of the guitar solo. They didn't need the help to screw up (especially Lee) but that was just cruel, not to mention goddamned unprofessional. TOPCARD La’Porsha Renae, “Come Together” (9/10) - Emaj and she can't get in the pocket? Really? Good thing "Come Together" doesn't lean on pitch. "And how much di dgthey psju hryt yp ersy hms" Great question, completely wasted SHUPS! Nice ear! It's now Saturday and I was being way too nitpicky. She's performing the hell out of this, early pitch quibbles aside. By the end of the song she is completely crushing it, and introduces perfectly pitched octave-jump yodels to her bag of tricks. Go 'head La'Porsha! To be clear I was only nitpicking La'Porsha. The other 4 grades are laser-accurate and I stand by them. MacKleBourg, “You Are So Beautiful” (5/10) - Seriously whoever's been playing the keys tonight needs a stern talking-to. That said this is not a singer's song and he still didn't nail it, with his wispy tone faltering regularly. The performance was solid enough though, at least for one that involved standing perfectly still. I remain unconvinced by MacK but he wasn't bad at all. It was kind of sweet, if a touch on-the-nose. He's safe for another week. B-B-B-B-B-BONUS ALUMNUS PERFORMUS 'Old' Nick Fradiani, "When I Get You Home" (garbage/10) - You know what, I like Nick. He's not a great singer or anything and he didn't even have a worthwhile competitor for the finale last ye--okay never mind that poo poo because his song just started. This is a pretty naked mashup of "Lose Yourself to Dance" and like 6 other songs, even down to the hook's lyrics they most certainly had to pay Young MC to use. (Good for you, Young MC!) He sounds like poo poo besides. His hair is also 75% dumber than before, which is no small feat. B-B-B-B-B-BACK TO THE JABRONIS Trent Harmon, “Stand By Me” (-2/10) - Trent is a real shithead to his family. That a cappella intro was downright odd. As is his pitch, lyrics, phrasing, presence, facial expressions, and rhythm. As is Trent. This is a hot buttered mess of freeform vamping and horrible falsetto. Then he did the "wahwah, wahwah" thing and I fell out of my chair laughing. Holy poo poo what a disaster. Dance like nobody's watching all you want, but "sing like nobody can hear" doesn't really apply to singshows. Jennifer tells him to be less like himself and more like who he was pretending to be before. A scathing critique indeed. Do they really want to remind us that we've seen the same goddamn songs performed year after year on this show? Tristan McIntosh, “A Broken Wing” (5.25/10) - Got DAM do the producers want her to win. Her low register is whisper-quiet but mostly in tune. The performance is super-pageanty but what do you expect from a person like Tristan? She's whiffing all of the big notes but not by a lot. Until the crescendo, that is, when she honks and falls off the rails. That last note was a sweetheart though, and she gets points for ambition since it's nice to see someone actually try after Trent and MacK. Dalton Rapattoni, “Eleanor Rigby” (-9/10) - Speaking of not even trying, here's Dalton to deliver a zero-energy dirge. Everything about this was bad. I don't think he said the last word of a single phrase in this performance. Slight improvement once he gets out of his chair but then he can't catch his breath. Remarkably terrible. And of course the judges love it. Lee in the bottom 3 is a no-brainer but Avalon and Sonika? Who is even voting at this point? I think I ask this every season but it remains baffling. It doesn't matter. None of this matters. My Idol brain is screaming at me that the finale is going to be McIntosh/Rapattoni but I'm not listening yet. BATTLING FOR A SPOT IN THE BOTTOM TWO NEXT WEEK Avalon Young, “P.Y.T. (Pretty Young Thing)” (3/10) - She immediately engages with the crowd. And that smile, man, that smile! If only she could put some oomph behind the vocal we could have had a star on our hands. Her charisma isn't enough to recommend the vocal, which fell short on pitch and punch in equal measure. Godspeed Avalon. Get a vocal coach and go win The Voice in a few years. I'll actually watch it again for that! Sidebar: The current EW recapper for Idol might have the worst, most incorrect possible opinions about this show. Lee Jean, “Let It Be” (1/10) - Okay well the audio was super hosed-up and there were lots of pops and crackles. But enough about Lee's pitch! This was so weak and personality-free that I forgot to listen like half the time. Bye Lee. Harry makes the worst joke in the world about Lee Jean selling dijon mustard. Get it? THEY RHYME. Ha Ha Ha Ha Oh Harry Ha Ha Ha Ha Sonika Vaid, “I Have Nothing” (6/10) - This song should have died with Whitney. Anyway Sonika's wearing a loving stunning dress. Her mom also looks a lot like Robert Carlysle. Her low register, like everyone else's, needs some work. Also she starts at full volume so the chorus has no impact. Then the key change gets botched by that goddamn keyboardist AGAIN!! What in the actual gently caress is going on here?! This needed dynamics and power and she had all the poise of a first-time tightrope walker. She did pretty well but if she's in the bottom after last week she's probably still in trouble. Sonika is saved and one of the kids cussed into a live mic. Bless this mess. See you next week. At least Adam Lambert's going to be there, right? Only 4 weeks and 50 more duets to go and it's all over. Hang tough, fellow Idolesbians.
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Mar 13, 2016 03:13
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I fell asleep halfway through, woke up an hour after the show. Ugh duets. Still feeling Ca'Maro and LonerFarmBoy as a final two. Glad Avalon and LeaJean are officially out. I'm guessing Sonika is next on the block.
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Mar 13, 2016 19:45
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I just want to say thank you for the amusing commentary. I watched the episodes up u ntil a few of the shows ago but reasding your guys things after watching them left me with a "huh quality" that I cant pin point, because I havent watched this show up until now and I am watching iwt with a 60 year old woman who is in church choir who amusingly comments 0on all of the contesnts good or bad, but we dont really ahve the same tastes. I like reading what you guys say you have good knowledge of this show and I dont know anything about it prior to this season so reading it is sometimes confusing but you make good points ... Anyways, I think I was the only person who liek red Olivia Rox I thought she had acool celebrity personality charisma about her and I thought besides that last song she did were all pretty good. I also liked Tristan and Sonika (I like the female fingers the most) so it was cool that they saved Sonika because I was kind of tired of Avalons shtick. Daltons last song wasnt great either, but what is confusing me is that Harry connicks performance was dreadful ... what am I missing here? I get the kelly clarkon love for like hey that was an emotional piece anyone with a heart could feel but harry connicks performacne was just bad ... Anyways, I wish Olivia didnt lose and I hope Tristan still wins and I hate how they jammed laporsha into that leather mess last episode, give us another diamonds performance not that ... Personally last episode I didnt really feel any of the music, I am glad lee jean went home and I hope mckenzie does too he is just so bland but the judges love him. I dont know if Tristans last songs were any good but I wsasnt impressed with Sonikas song choice, but whatever I am glad she is going through. How is trent still surviving this far in?
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Mar 16, 2016 08:26
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Meowbot posted:(I like the female fingers the most)  I think everything about Olivia showed promise except for her voice - not the tone of it, but her control of it. With a few years and a vocal coach she could easily place 4th on a season of The Voice.Meowbot posted:How is trent still surviving this far in? Producer favorite. He's had free passes on hell week, hollywood week, group rounds, and was put through all the way to voting without really earning it. The only thing he hasn't been gifted is a judge save and he has zero chance of winning. So! Tonight one person will go home Top 5 Song Spoilers and my grades for song choice Tristan McIntosh – It’s My Life by Bon Jovi D- Sonika Vaid – Clarity by Zedd ?? Dalton Rapattoni – Sound of Silence by Simon and Garfunkel LOL La'Porsha Renae – No More Drama by Mary J. Blige C MacKenzie Bourg – Billie Jean by Michael Jackson F Trent Harmon – Simple Man by Lynyrd Skynyrd D La'Porsha Renae – Ready For Love by India Arie A+ Trent Harmon – Counting Stars by Onerepublic F MacKenzie Bourg – Wild World by Cat Stevens B Dalton Rapattoni – Numb by Linkin Park F- Tristan McIntosh – Independence Day by Martina McBride Oh Lord Sonika Vaid - Let it Go by Demi Lovato The Frozen song oh my god Sonika veer left veer left!! Probably won't watch until tomorrow night or later but by all means sound off SHVPS4DETH fucked around with this message at 21:38 on Mar 17, 2016 |
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Mar 17, 2016 07:52
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LOL 15 seasons in and they still have embarrassing technical screwups. Fun to see the crew on stage though :P
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Mar 18, 2016 03:36
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Top uh.. 6 maybe? What a cold open. I called it 100x on them trying to make it Dalt-bert Lam-ppatoni. Look for a very forced torch passing later in the broadcast. Scot Borch claps really lovely for someone that is a lifelong musician. Tighpants Trent: Song is garbage, Trent left to pull shapes on his own with nothing resembling accompiment. The shape he pulls is "high and fluttery". Camera staying carefully waist up to avoid Trent's basket of breadsticks. Bad performance. Oh looks like I'm not alone in having Trent's dick on my mind. This girl knows exactly what she was going for. The lowest of fives.   Shame there is no tour this year for you to hoe around on Trent. But maybe you dont like grabby girls. Thats ok. Onto Dalton! Wow, scraping the barrel of video effects. This song is weak too. Harry's complete boredom is well lingered on by the truck. Song got worse as it went on. Ending on a total new show low of notes-unsung. See you next week Dalty! La'Porsha. A little runny but far above average. Two guys in really bad tailcoats do their thing. Probably the only moment all season where Mackenz will be unstrung. The Unstrung One: Shocker! Maybe one is waiting for him on stage. SHUPS will know who I'm thinking of from seasons past that could be counted on to deliver this exact piece of poo poo performance. Some really faux-rooty guy who took this saccharine crap along for weeks. gently caress off Mackenzie, you suck. I bet that girl didnt even try to grab his dick on the way out. Welp, looks like its all over for Sonika going up against at 15 year old. How is there still over an hour of show left? Tristan goes first: Vocal was quite spotty. Like she hasn't sung this for a month. Deserves to go home for this. And her face says she might know it. Sonika: Hopefully enough to stay. How was this song a huge Oscar-winning megahit? It was just enough to stay! Hurray! Let the other one go! Let her go! Daltwo: I'd say sitting cross legged would normally kill a singer's range and control, but, hey its Dalt. Somewhere out there a tween-aimed touring small stage production/light show of Les Miserables knows it has found its next Jean Val Jean. Somehow Keith found himself 'spellbound' by that. There was your clumsy torch passing everyone. Keith had to pretend to be held rapt by the vocal equivalent of a Lunchable. Adam does a song and throws some quasi-hip hop hand gestures. He seems a little old for this, but I liked the part where they sang that perfect single 'Anuh' to eachother and the girl gave a claw-hand. The most musical shrug I've ever seen. Bourg II: I'm a sucker for sliding into harmonic guitar notes. Tentative stamp of approval from me. Trent Again: Alison could probably sing the gently caress out of this song solo. It needs flat gravel and I doubt it will be good with Trent's warble instead. Didnt like it. And no dead-friend imbued magic guitar. What gives? Sonika (or a clone, we have no way of knowing): Hopefully absorbs all of Tristan's former vote-for-pretty voting base. I dont know this song, but she should be doing straight up hook-laden EDM music at this point. I hear the kids listen to that. Even if its just singing one word the whole time put to a Skrillex beat. That should be her lane. La'Porsha: Not the Mary J Blige song I'd clear for her, but she really made something of it. And apparently It meant a heck of a lot to her. Good song choice then. Stop listening to me altogether La'Porsha. After this is going to suck when she gets bumped off in two weeks to keep a space clear for Dalton. Where was the stage malfunction? shadow puppet of a fucked around with this message at 10:32 on Mar 18, 2016 |
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Mar 18, 2016 10:28
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having a real hard time not laughing at Laporsha saying you cant kill me then doing her HANDS UP FREEZE spin dance, and its supposed to be super emotional but its so funny at t he same time. I think Trent did an alright job I had to listen to it again after the praise from JLO but it was pretty good. I am sad Tristan went home but she didnt sing a very good song tonight so I cant fault the judges. How do you sing a song from the same artist from last time and manage to gently caress it up? Dalton is just getting worse it seems after last weeks stinker and now this ... I still like Sonika but tonights song wasnt fantastic. No one really seems a "lock" at this point.
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Mar 18, 2016 13:52
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shadow puppet of a posted:Where was the stage malfunction? Before Dalton's second song they started playing the wrong clip - the old ladies in the salon again - then just cut back to a wide high shot of the stage while the crew was setting up for about 20 seconds before they started playing the right clip.
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Mar 19, 2016 05:06
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I liked Dalton before, but now it just seems like he's constantly below the pitch. LaPorsha is the only one who deserves to win.
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Mar 19, 2016 05:07
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I can't bring myself to watch this every week any longer, once every two weeks seems bearable. I just read comments from this thread for last episode, no way I'm gonna watch that. Glad to see Tristan got finally sent home.
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Mar 19, 2016 10:17
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Bolivar posted:I can't bring myself to watch this every week any longer, once every two weeks seems bearable. I just read comments from this thread for last episode, no way I'm gonna watch that. Glad to see Tristan got finally sent home. Just watch TVLine's Reality Check on youtube, it comes out on Mondays or Tuesdays and in 10-ish minutes will keep you up on the week's singery. Its how I watched most of the Caleb season until even that got too unbearable.
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Mar 19, 2016 11:12
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Dalton. For all his vocal coach background, and unique arrangements, has been consistently bad the last three weeks. It makes me wonder how much that affects his fan base (none). I am still feeling that LaPorsha Trent finale. MacKenzie is solid 3 and could sneak into finals. I think it's Sonika or Dalton next week. I fell asleep after the first round, but glad to see Tristan finally go home. Yessssss.
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Mar 19, 2016 11:26
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The new Reality Check is pretty good. Another one of those get-it-out-your-system editions. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a9JeQaEKdnc https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nHr4awacmuY Slezak comes to terms with his feelings towards Randy and accurately compares Trent Harmon to excess mayo. Melinda is forced to confront her past performance of Nutbush City Limits.
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Mar 22, 2016 12:59
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Giving myself a mulligan this week. I know I watched maybe the first half of the show and La'Porsha was the only one worth seeing again but here's the fun thing: I decided to watch the episode without recapping to really focus on poo poo instead of trying to write and wow what a mistake. I can only imagine what it would have been like had I been the least bit sober. That, and I've been getting better sleep and haven't had a real day off in a month. I've also noticed that I basically say the exact same poo poo every week about these singers so maybe skipping one show might help that a little (spoiler: no it won't). Either way, song spoilers for Sia/Clas-- oh god this group is taking on Sia? Uhh maybe I should take another week off. Anyway songs for Sia/Classic Rock week, with likelihood of a successful cover or grades for song choice. I'm not sure which, sort of hungry Sia Selections La’Porsha Renae — “Elastic Heart” 60% - This is a lot more range-y than we've seen from La'Porsha so far and it's out of her comfort zone. Expect the Glee Key. MacKenzie Bourg — “Titanium” 10% - This might expose MacK once and for all. Expect a Mraz-esque cover that shifts down a full octave. Trent Harmon — “Chandelier” 0% - Trent's falsetto is his biggest flaw not deigned by producers. This will be horrific. Or he'll surprise me. But seriously, horrific. Dalton Rapattoni — “Bird Set Free” 0% - No gimmick can possibly make this work. It doesn't matter at this point, Lazaro Malakar is taking the season. Sonika Vaid — “Loved Me Back to Life” 5% Indelibly Sia-esque Celine Dion performance? She's doomed if she stays in this lane. She's doomed anyway. Overplayed Classic Rock Tunes La’Porsha Renae — Bon Jovi’s “Wanted Dead or Alive” C Should have done "Have a Nice Day" as a MindyDoo tribute (since she's also going home in 3rd) MacKenzie Bourg — Cheap Trick’s “I Want You to Want Me” F Cheap Trick indeed. This is going to be so boring. Trent Harmon — Z.Z. Top’s “Sharp Dressed Man” D+ Trent Harmon Has No Idea What Kind Of Artist He Wants To Be, cont'd Dalton Rapattoni — The Beach Boys’ “God Only Knows” A- if it's the producers finally figuring out how to get rid of him. Or test his fanbase. Either way. Sonika Vaid — Patti Smith Group’s “Because the Night” D Probably the 10,000 Maniacs version. That is to say, the plaintive and colorless version. I already don't want to watch this at all. La'Porsha winning is the only happy ending to this season, so let's hope she's more of a Caleb and less of a Bowersox.
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Mar 24, 2016 18:22
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Top Five night. I imagine this to be a night of hard cuts. So goodbye La'Porsha, there is now more than ever, good money to be made off tweens with burgeoning social media accounts. I am looking forward to seeing Steven interact with Dalton and Mackenzie both. Holy poo poo did they fail to warn of LP from taking this candyfloss faux-dirge. Really bad in all aspects. Even the backup singer dropped this one. She probably could have kicked the poo poo out a Journey track too. Huge bummer. And the slightly battlefield earth styling. Mackenze "upper teeth" Bourg does a good job acting surprised at his pick. His song is like trying to eat a burger on wonderbread. everything sinks into mush without the substance of a crust. gently caress off. And take your teeth with you. So far Steven's interactions don't come across as anything useful. Back to spinning old Zombies 45's and pretending that anyone gives a poo poo about your radio show I guess. I never watched the David Cook season but he don't seem to have evolved much from the other times I've seen him guesting. if maybe not regressing a bit closer to some near Chad Kroeger vocal/lyrical lazyness. Lets see if Steven VZ can help out Trent. "More Schwampy!" Hmm. Trent: This feels like the revenge of Taylor Hicks. This feels terrible. Like coming from an alternate universe that never invented several safer food dye alternatives. Or like a version of the Lawrence Welk show set in the Hunger Games universe where Trent will be killed because the neck chain under his button down collar failed to turn into a grand sparkling flight of doves at the crescendo. Good to see Dalt in trouble. Even if its fake AI fakeout trouble. Bye Soni. I kinda want to see Dalt twee up a Beachboy's song. Ugh, I wanted to hear a song not watch another "Stars On Ice" caliber emote-actout interlude. Back to the same seated maudlin poo poo that (possibly) put him in the bottom? Smart move. He has to hit a high at some point right? Welp, nope. That was awful. I hate Dalternative music.
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Mar 25, 2016 09:44
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