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AndItsAllGone
Oct 8, 2003

Parmesan Basil posted:

Anybody here/seen my old friend Calvin/can you tell me where he's gone/he caught a lot of touchdowns/but it seems the good they die young

I just wanted to say this did not go unnoticed and it put a big smile on my face.

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Detroit_Dogg
Feb 2, 2008
Aaron Rodgers is gay and lame and oh please cum in me Aaron PLEASE I NEED IT OH STAFFORD YOUR COCK IS NOT WORTHY ONLY THE GAYEST RODGERS PRICK CAN SATISFY MY DESPERATE THROAT

Bip Roberts posted:

Who wants to wreck your brain for a poo poo-tier franchise.

Enough about Ben Roethlisberger

JIZZ DENOUEMENT
Oct 3, 2012

STRIKE!
Kirk Cousins leads the league in completion % at 69%. What a world.

Chichevache
Feb 17, 2010

One of the funniest posters in GIP.

Just not intentionally.

John Brown posted:

He is indeed one of the better QBs in the league. That's why I said he's above average. Matt Ryan is also above average, but having Julio opposite of you instead of Golden Tate is a substantial difference.

Yeah, Tate actually plays all 16 games.

howe_sam
Mar 7, 2013

Creepy little garbage eaters

Golden Tate is a fantastic receiver.

Johnson is pretty clearly starting to entire his decline phase, spent most of the past two seasons with nagging injuries, and has already made more money than he knows what do with it. I think if anything has broken him, it's just playing football.

MikeCrotch
Nov 5, 2011

I AM UNJUSTIFIABLY PROUD OF MY SPAGHETTI BOLOGNESE RECIPE

YES, IT IS AN INCREDIBLY SIMPLE DISH

NO, IT IS NOT NORMAL TO USE A PEPPERAMI INSTEAD OF MINCED MEAT

YES, THERE IS TOO MUCH SALT IN MY RECIPE

NO, I WON'T STOP SHARING IT

more like BOLLOCKnese

howe_sam posted:

Golden Tate is a fantastic receiver.

Johnson is pretty clearly starting to entire his decline phase, spent most of the past two seasons with nagging injuries, and has already made more money than he knows what do with it. I think if anything has broken him, it's just playing football.

Are you saying that the fact he plays for the Detroit Football Lions has nothing to do with the fact that he wants to retire

Because I think we all know that isn't true

MJeff
Jun 2, 2011

THE LIAR

howe_sam posted:

Golden Tate is a fantastic receiver.

Johnson is pretty clearly starting to entire his decline phase, spent most of the past two seasons with nagging injuries, and has already made more money than he knows what do with it. I think if anything has broken him, it's just playing football.

But my ":lol: Lions" meme. :qq:

Chris James 2
Aug 9, 2012


At some point it stops becoming a meme and becomes fact

See also Factory of Sadness and Bungles

General Dog
Apr 26, 2008

Everybody's working for the weekend
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4GVjkg_7bK0

MikeCrotch
Nov 5, 2011

I AM UNJUSTIFIABLY PROUD OF MY SPAGHETTI BOLOGNESE RECIPE

YES, IT IS AN INCREDIBLY SIMPLE DISH

NO, IT IS NOT NORMAL TO USE A PEPPERAMI INSTEAD OF MINCED MEAT

YES, THERE IS TOO MUCH SALT IN MY RECIPE

NO, I WON'T STOP SHARING IT

more like BOLLOCKnese

Chris James 2 posted:

At some point it stops becoming a meme and becomes fact

See also Factory of Sadness and Bungles

But the Bengals are in the playoffs again this year! That's gotta mean there's hope for the Lions right?

Right?

Vertical Lime
Dec 11, 2004

Can confirm thread title is true

https://twitter.com/AdamSchefter/status/693920859614900226

Darth Brooks
Jan 15, 2005

I do not wear this mask to protect me. I wear it to protect you from me.

Oh that sucks.

Roasted Donut
Aug 24, 2007

NWA WHITE POWERRR!!!!
I CAN'T BELIEVE THE loving LIONS DID IT AGAIN JESUS loving CHRIST

Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 10, 2007

Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.
This is depressing. Contract the Lions.

Alaois
Feb 7, 2012

clearly Calvin Johnson is retiring from football to go to the WWE and join his former college teammate Joseph Roman The Big Dog Reigns Anaoa'i

Shindragon
Jun 6, 2011

by Athanatos
:(

No More Megatron.

Parmesan Basil
Nov 12, 2008

TIME IS THE FIRE IN WHICH WE BURN THE GAME CLOCK

AndItsAllGone posted:

I just wanted to say this did not go unnoticed and it put a big smile on my face.

Thank you friend!

Samadhi
May 13, 2001

I remember reading an interview with Calvin Johnson a few years back and it talked about how he was super responsible with his money and invested almost all of it so he's gonna be set for life which is good :unsmith:

Shangri-Law School
Feb 19, 2013

He already had plans to retire at the start of the season. What a disappointing sendoff we gave him. :(

forward pass
Dec 9, 2005

Y'all get back now.
Yeah, he always said he'd take care of his immediate family, but cousins, aunts, uncles, buddies...etc. can hit the road.

MJeff
Jun 2, 2011

THE LIAR
This is bad for me as a fan of the Detroit Football Lions, but I'm happy as a fan of Calvin Johnson being able to continue to walk upright and generally be a happy member of society.

I'm just glad I got to see five years of him doing his thing with Stafford.

If you think this is more about the Lions being bad than it is about 10 years of football physically annihilating you, you might be loving stupid. :ssh:

Jen X
Sep 29, 2014

To bring light to the darkness, whether that darkness be ignorance, injustice, apathy, or stagnation.

Roasted Donut posted:

I CAN'T BELIEVE THE loving LIONS DID IT AGAIN JESUS loving CHRIST

Lessail
Apr 1, 2011

:cry::cry:
tell me how vgk aren't playing like shit again
:cry::cry:
p.s. help my grapes are so sour!

VJeff posted:

This is bad for me as a fan of the Detroit Football Lions, but I'm happy as a fan of Calvin Johnson being able to continue to walk upright and generally be a happy member of society.

I'm just glad I got to see five years of him doing his thing with Stafford.

If you think this is more about the Lions being bad than it is about 10 years of football physically annihilating you, you might be loving stupid. :ssh:

someone is in denial

Dr_Strangelove
Dec 16, 2003

Mein Fuhrer! THEY WON!

Roasted Donut posted:

I CAN'T BELIEVE THE loving LIONS DID IT AGAIN JESUS loving CHRIST

:negative: is the only appropriate response to the Lions

Winkie01
Nov 28, 2004
Didn't a 27 year old WR just die? The guy has made over 100 million and is on a poo poo franchise, can't say I blame him and saying gently caress it i'm out.

Shangri-Law School
Feb 19, 2013

I blame Joe Lombardi.

rabidsquid
Oct 11, 2004

LOVES THE KOG


Calvin Johnson is cool and good and I will miss watching him play football.

MJeff
Jun 2, 2011

THE LIAR

Cruel and Unusual posted:

I blame Joe Lombardi.

I think I have more contempt for Lombardi more than I ever hated Schwartz or Linehan or Mayhew right now.

B.F. Hoodrich
May 16, 2006
welp

rabidsquid posted:

Calvin Johnson is cool and good and I will miss watching him play football.

BigBoss
Jan 26, 2012

by Lowtax
I'm not surprised. I heard scuttlebutt about 2 years ago that Calvin had injuries that were more serious than was let on and that his time was limited. It's sad to see him go since he was an amazing player, but I'm glad he's hanging it up before he turns his body and mind to mush.

misdirectomy
Feb 19, 2008
Personally I'm just surprised something bad happened to the Detroit Lions.

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Fun Shoe
another detroit thing dying

:rip:

Chris James 2
Aug 9, 2012


godspeed

AsInHowe
Jan 11, 2007

red winged angel
As someone who sees these guys a lot, this isn't surprising. The only surprising part is Calvin deciding before the season.

Dude is really banged up, and he is about to get married.

curiosity fucked me up
Oct 7, 2014
Meh, if he was so loving good maybe we would have won a playoff game. Megatron is overrated

kill me now

Silly Burrito
Nov 27, 2007

SET A COURSE FOR
THE FLAVOR QUADRANT
Roll out, Megatron.

Metapod
Mar 18, 2012

Beautiful :perfect:

Samadhi
May 13, 2001

Silly Burrito posted:

Roll out, Megatron.

Detroit_Dogg
Feb 2, 2008
Aaron Rodgers is gay and lame and oh please cum in me Aaron PLEASE I NEED IT OH STAFFORD YOUR COCK IS NOT WORTHY ONLY THE GAYEST RODGERS PRICK CAN SATISFY MY DESPERATE THROAT

Make Chuck Hughes the one in the middle

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chuck_Hughes

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Yoshifan823
Feb 19, 2007

by FactsAreUseless
Hey, can we send Roethlisberger to Detroit next? Maybe he'll decide to hang it up too.

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