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Colonel Cancer posted:Or you just cast Sleep This is about how to get a girl to date you not just how to have sex with her.
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Jan 25, 2016 16:32
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don't forget to palpitate your scent sack and spray her from head to toe in sex pheromones. prepare to fight the other males off as they encroach, drawn in by the smell of the sexhappenings. defeat your rivals and spread your genetic code, but watch out because after copulation the female might try to eat your head. welp, that's all i've learned in my several decades of dating, good luck!
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Jan 25, 2016 16:34
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Applewhite posted:Basically the reverse of Homer Simpson's lobster trick. Very clever! The hardest part is figuring out which fat girl would look hot if she lost weight. Advanced Move for Experts/guys who like a little "extra": Find a girl who's too skinny and fatten her up to the right weight but don't go too far! This has the added bonus of making her undesirable to potential rivals.
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Jan 25, 2016 16:36
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If you need more time to ask a girl out, consider placing her at the bottom of a steep gravity well while you think of the perfect line. Time will seem to stand still for her while continuing at a normal pace relative to you.
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Jan 25, 2016 16:39
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Send her DVD Box Set of Fruits Basket Anime with a card asking her to date you written in Japanese.
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Jan 25, 2016 16:41
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Holy poo poo, Applewhite must be swimming in puss The famael vagoo I mean, not cats or the goo that comes out of zits, but those would be great too
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Jan 25, 2016 16:43
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Here's something they (the matriarchy) don't want you to know : women are just as scared as you are when it comes to approach and rejection. However, through the dark art of vagomancy they've crafted a perfect society where not only is the burden on the man alone to the be the pursuer but in that role he can be guilty of crossing unseen and perpetually shifting lines of conduct that will disqualify him from mating and may even land him in jail if he's accused shrilly enough. Quite the racket they've got going if you ask me. I'd suggest staying gay.
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Jan 25, 2016 16:45
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Dress like a girl and infiltrate her circle of friends to find out what she likes and dislikes. Lay the groundwork to steer her towards dating you, talk yourself up and discourage her relationships with other boys. When the time is ripe, she'll ask you out. Then, quietly fake the death of your girl persona.
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Jan 25, 2016 16:47
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ask her if you can dunk a dill pickle in her vagina hole
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Jan 25, 2016 16:49
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Transition to a girl and then ask yourself out. Bear in mind that you'll probably be out of your league, so be prepared to face rejection.
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Jan 25, 2016 16:56
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Drink a potion that splits you into your "male" and "female" personas. Ask your female persona out. Just don't get her pregnant because your children will be extremely, extremely inbred.
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Jan 25, 2016 16:58
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Anger an evil bishop so that he curses you and the girl so that she's a hawk by day and you're a wolf by night. Then you can keep her in a cage and she can keep you on a leash.
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Jan 25, 2016 17:01
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dad gay. so what posted:ask her if you can dunk a dill pickle in her vagina hole works every time
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Jan 25, 2016 17:04
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Get her tickets to a baseball game, then pay to have the jumbotron flash the words "will you go out with me?" in one of the breaks between innings.
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Jan 25, 2016 17:05
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Change Yourself Change Yourself Change Yourself Women love a man who is willing to compromise even his most fundamental identity to conform to her vision of an ideal man. Find out what her ideal man is and become him wholly and completely. Subsume your identity into an extension of hers.
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Jan 25, 2016 17:20
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the important thing is making sure that nobody feels comfortable with what they're doing
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Jan 25, 2016 17:25
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Remember that all human interactions can be simplified down to a series of equations. If you give her the right inputs, you're guaranteed the desired response. The difficulty comes in the fact that the equations governing her actions are concealed by a "black box" function. They cannot be directly observed, but they can be deduced by observing their effects. Test her with a series of other interactions specially calculated to reveal the nature of her governing equations. Once you've worked them out, you will know exactly what to say and do to get her to go out with you.
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Jan 25, 2016 17:30
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Is it frowned upon to use black magic while attempting to ask the girl out?
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Jan 25, 2016 17:37
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Calbiyum posted:Is it frowned upon to use black magic while attempting to ask the girl out? By no means. In fact, many women find that they prefer Black magic once they've tried it.
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Jan 25, 2016 17:46
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Applewhite posted:Remember that all human interactions can be simplified down to a series of equations. If you give her the right inputs, you're guaranteed the desired response. The difficulty comes in the fact that the equations governing her actions are concealed by a "black box" function. They cannot be directly observed, but they can be deduced by observing their effects. "You see a tortoise in the desert..."
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Jan 25, 2016 17:52
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I cracked the code so to speak and now im drowning in poonstang. How do I do the opposite of OP?
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Jan 25, 2016 17:52
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Moltke posted:I cracked the code so to speak and now im drowning in poonstang. How do I do the opposite of OP? You mean dumping a girl? Easy. Put together a scavenger hunt, but instead of making it a romantic scavenger hunt with things like "the first place we kissed" and "the birthday present you got last year" make all the clues about the bad parts of your relationship like "you keep forgetting to turn this off" and "the first place you caused an embarrassing scene." At the end of the scavenger hunt, her prize is a photo of you kissing a different girl with a note saying "I think we should see other people."
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Jan 25, 2016 17:56
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Start dating other women and taking them home and having sex with them in front of her. She'll get the picture.
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Jan 25, 2016 18:02
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What if the girl asks me out. Should i feel emasculated and fight her to regain dominance? Or do i swallow my pride and let her swallow my Dickkkkkkkk
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Jan 25, 2016 18:04
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Calbiyum posted:What if the girl asks me out. Should i feel emasculated and fight her to regain dominance? Or do i swallow my pride and let her swallow my When she asks you out it's a trick. If you accept, she will know you're a desperate manbaby with a tiny penis and you have basically zero chance of getting laid. She only wants to go out with you to humiliate you publicly. Turn her down when she asks you, then ask her out at a later time. This will prove you're a mature adult man.
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Jan 25, 2016 18:07
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"Hi, you look like a Doctor Who fan. We should go out and talk about it." It will either fail hard or succeed brilliantly. Either way, it only took 20 seconds of your life.
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Jan 25, 2016 18:10
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To breakup with a girl, travel to the Celestial Palace and steal the Golden Scissors of Fate. use them to cut the Red String that binds you to your beloved.
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Jan 25, 2016 18:19
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Tell her about Homestuck.
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Jan 25, 2016 18:30
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Leroy Dennui posted:Tell her about Homestuck. Telling a girl about Homestuck is the "aloha" of relationship beginnings/ends. It's a great way to ask a girl out for the first time, and a great way to end an ongoing relationship.
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Jan 25, 2016 18:32
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What if her brother is cuter
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Jan 25, 2016 18:51
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ITT Applewhite crushes it.
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Jan 25, 2016 19:25
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Calbiyum posted:What if her brother is cuter How to pull off the brother/sister switch: Wait until the girl is asleep, then gently lift her out of your bed and put her in her brother's bed. Then, lift the brother out of his bed and carry him into your bed and crawl in behind him. When they wake up, pretend everything is normal. They'll be confused at first but play along because each of them will think they're the only one who's out of the loop. Eventually they'll settle into their new roles.
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Jan 25, 2016 19:57
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How can I ask an asian girl out? Do I bow before or after I initiate the conversation
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Jan 25, 2016 19:58
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Bow before, but if you're socially senior to her, wait for her to initiate the bow or you'll lose face.
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Jan 25, 2016 19:59
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Remember that Asian girls are more scared of you than you are of them. Try enticing them with a handful of cashews. You may have to wait a long time before she trusts you enough to come up and take one. Don't make any sudden move or you might spook her. Once you have her trust and she becomes accustomed to your scent, she may even let you pet her!
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Jan 25, 2016 20:05
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WHATS HIS NAME LOL!!!
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Jan 25, 2016 20:21
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Have you tried Christian mingle? If you strike out there try jdate. Do Muslims have a religion specific dating site?
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Jan 25, 2016 20:57
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Another great way to ask a girl out is to put her in a position where any rejection of you is actually a rejection of your race/sex/religion/sexual orientation. She will be scared to refuse you a date because if she does she will look like a bigot.
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Jan 25, 2016 20:57
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ChrisHansen posted:Have you tried Christian mingle? If you strike out there try jdate. https://www.jihottiesis.is
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Jan 25, 2016 21:01
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which girl should i ask out, there's more than one girl 
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Jan 25, 2016 21:02
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