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gary oldmans diary
Sep 26, 2005

Applewhite posted:

Uh but there could be!
:raise: man or woman?

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Topographic Nap
Apr 22, 2007

a resin that binds all the stink particles in your GI tract, the downside is it comes out dry

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

Uh, both?

Sponge Baathist
Jan 30, 2010

by FactsAreUseless
a domestic violence inhibiting A shirt


e: gently caress beaten

Quote-Unquote
Oct 22, 2002



a gate for your front yard that has the word 'gamer' in it so everybody knows not to approach your house

social vegan
Nov 7, 2014



Quote-Unquote posted:

a gate for your front yard that has the word 'gamer' in it so everybody knows not to approach your house

just paint ur door with poo poo instead of blood

social vegan
Nov 7, 2014



it'll b obvious from all the half digested corn nuts

Quote-Unquote
Oct 22, 2002



social vegan posted:

just paint ur door with poo poo instead of blood

i fail to see how this has the additional benefit of letting people know where i stand wrt ethics in gaming journalism?!

social vegan
Nov 7, 2014



Quote-Unquote posted:

i fail to see how this has the additional benefit of letting people know where i stand wrt ethics in gaming journalism?!

p sure the poo poo covers that thanks

staberind
Feb 20, 2008

but i dont wanna be a spaceship
Fun Shoe
an app that checks the daily consistency of your stools and suggests what you might consume to provide the perfect texture, flow and floatyness.
Edit: and amount you need to cover approx 2 square meters of door.

Quote-Unquote
Oct 22, 2002



social vegan posted:

p sure the poo poo covers that thanks

oh yeah you make a good point

a forcefield for your phone to stop it getting scratched but fingers can go through the forcefield

EdwardSwifferhands
Apr 27, 2008

I will probably lick whatever you put in front of me.
A pair of underwear that tests the moisture content of your farts and lets you know if a shart is imminent.

EdwardSwifferhands
Apr 27, 2008

I will probably lick whatever you put in front of me.
A way to remove your arms safely so you don't have to worry about where to put them while you sleep.

social vegan
Nov 7, 2014



an internet connection that disables ur keyboard

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost
A clown nose that has an air horn inside so it honks deafeningly loud.

cheesetriangles
Jan 5, 2011





A medical xray that shoots gamma rays to give you super powers.

shut up blegum
Dec 17, 2008


--->Plastic Lawn<---

Applewhite posted:

A ring that can be placed around the neck of a cormorant so that it is prevented from swallowing the fish it catches and you can collect a bunch of fish while the bird does all the work.

I created your dream, that's me in the vid:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JNEplaYZtpI

Please give me 1 million dollars. Or more.

EDIT: a bank chain that only accepts giant novelty cheques

Rutibex
Sep 9, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
we need anti-dollars!

money is great, but it only goes one way. we need a counter part to money, a financial "down vote" so that people really can vote with their wallets. this way if you dont like a political candidate or something, you can send them anti-dollars to cancel out the positive dollar that other people have sent them :eng101:

dad gay. so what
Feb 18, 2003

by FactsAreUseless
a boner that can travel through time

Rutibex
Sep 9, 2001

by Fluffdaddy

SciFiDownBeat posted:

A programmable whoopie cushion

A programmable whoopie goldberg

Gym Leader Barack
Oct 31, 2005

Grimey Drawer
A replacement car exterior door handle that can hold a boiled egg and also dispense and heat up a new egg once the first is removed

Gym Leader Barack
Oct 31, 2005

Grimey Drawer
Extension wheels that can bolt over existing car wheels to turn any standard vehicle into a monster truck.

Gym Leader Barack
Oct 31, 2005

Grimey Drawer
Spring-loaded silicone hands for application of aftershave

Gym Leader Barack
Oct 31, 2005

Grimey Drawer
Chastity belts for Fleshlights

Nigmaetcetera
Nov 17, 2004

borkborkborkmorkmorkmork-gabbalooins
A device for capturing your farts and pumping them into your cpap machine so you can smell it, helping you get to sleep faster

Noyemi K
Dec 9, 2012

youll always be so sleepy when youre this tiny *plompf*
a radio pulse cooker like a microwave oven, but with gamma rays instead

Noyemi K
Dec 9, 2012

youll always be so sleepy when youre this tiny *plompf*
ebooks... for men

ikanreed
Sep 25, 2009

I honestly I have no idea who cannibal[SIC] is and I do not know why I should know.

syq dude, just syq!
Women, but they put out for fat ugly creepos like me.

Tomato Burger
Jun 18, 2007
The secret is granola.
A plugin to analyze all of your posts to see who has replied to your threads / posts the most. It'll help identify secret crushes.

Alternatively: puts that user on Ignore.

Tomato Burger
Jun 18, 2007
The secret is granola.
A bathroom-rating app, but real time.

Quote-Unquote
Oct 22, 2002



Volume control for dogs

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost
Shoes for ants. Think about it: ants have six feet, that's three times as many shoes as a human wears. And there are billions of ants in any given acre of land. 30% of the world's biomass is an untapped market!

ghlbtsk
Apr 19, 2005

these bath mats
are
GORGEOUS

Quote-Unquote posted:

Volume control for dogs

:golfclap:


A baseball cap, the front of which is a hidden panel that contains a telescoping arm.
At the end of the arm is a hand with the index finger raised so it can shoot out of the hat and cover someone's lips to shush them if you want them to stop talking.

kalel
Jun 19, 2012

Hydrofracking, but for people's asses

Stuffguyman
Jun 3, 2007
Robot cat that is also a Roomba for cleaning up all that excess cat hair.

kalel
Jun 19, 2012

An app that runs a neural network that procedurally generates and plays double-time swing and ragtime

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost
A reversible coat where one side is a normal coat and the other side is a vest.

King of Bees
Dec 28, 2012
Gravy Boat 2k
A hood that's a wig so you can wear a hood but it looks like a nice haircut and not a hood.

Tomato Burger
Jun 18, 2007
The secret is granola.
Flintstones boat.

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kalel
Jun 19, 2012

A TV extension that takes your picture asks you to speak lines of dialogue, and then inserts a depiction of you into the show that interacts seamlessly with the characters.

Mad Mib

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