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ClamdestineBoyster posted:I'm on the rag because nobody will gently caress a baby into me. if we can calculate the exact angle and velocity necessary, taking into account the wind and air resistance, i can nut one into ya from here
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Feb 7, 2016 03:25
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i want to do nothing but gaze into women's eyes and caress their bodies and gently caress the poo poo out of them and curl up on the couch and watch some netflix but apparently i am expected to do 'work' at something called a 'job'
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Feb 7, 2016 03:27
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Sizone posted:you should get a "job" as a "gigolo" i would but i need the health insurance and they don't do matching benefits for my 401k
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Feb 7, 2016 03:42
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bee training has not been going so well and the honey we harvest has been formed from our blood
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Feb 7, 2016 11:52
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my motorcycle idles at 6mph and that's how fast i can ride because it ain't got no diploma and no job prospects and no hobbies neither
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Feb 7, 2016 11:53
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i'm underwater and there's a whole bunch of scary animals down here and even the plants have animal characteristics and I think seaweed might be a single-celled organization but that cell is big enough to come down on ya like a pile o bricks gently caress the sea 
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Feb 7, 2016 11:55
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literally everything gives you cancer so since I've gained super strength (through a carcinogenic super serum) I've been picking up suv's off the road and just huffin their tail pipes, just askin the driver to step on it and really get mean, just blowin out a smog cloud so big the whole block's gonna need to power wash i tell my doctor about it and he tells me I need to stop but look man I do this poo poo socially, this is how I get a little time away from the grind and hang with my bro's, ain't no patch for that
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Feb 7, 2016 12:00
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I strongly suspect that rain can be divided into two varieties of drops: ovuloid, or egg-shaped, and spheroid, or apple-shaped. I hate the spheroid drops because I think their random pitters and patters on our roofs, a poisson distribution of noise and entropy, the buzzing echoes of our final cold death in the void, these rooftop trappings are a distraction from the ovuloid drops, who gentle ringing on the window pane, as if a silver bell were rung by a winged cherub, hides prophetic messages that give us insight into the true mind of god here in Seattle it rains most days of the year, and I've been working feverishly for months to decode the dulcet tones of the ovuloid drops. i believe i am close to the answer, and have set every ounce of computer I am allowed at the university supercomputers to the task of locating in the ovuloid drop message an unsubscribe link, because seriously, the medium is the message, and receiving a rain message is only one step below a god drat singing telegram and I won't have it go gently caress yourself god, make a god drat snapchat account or something
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Feb 7, 2016 12:13
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when you step in dog poo poo I know you can in theory clean them off and enjoy them for years to come but you'll never forget, they'll always be the dogshit shoes to you, and that's how I felt the first time my son crapped his pants
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Feb 7, 2016 12:16
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neg my poz hole!!! nuff said
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Feb 7, 2016 12:17
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Mr. Belding posted:i thought x files was on tonight but it's not it's tomorrow. lol if you watch tv shows on the man's schedule
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Feb 7, 2016 22:01
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Beautiful Madness posted:Its amazing to me how woman all have extremely similar personalities. they all think they are "not like all the other girls" but really they are all the same. They all have little quirks that they think makes them unique and different but really they are very much alike personality-wise. Women are not funny. They are not witty. They are not cool. The only thing that separates them is IQ(which is in the same range for 95% of women) and some are less rude in public than others. Those are literally the only differences. As men we learn to love the little things women do like the way there hair falls over their ears. We judge their personalities on a such a trivial level relative to how women judge ours. i tipped my fedora to this so hard it fell off my head and into a week old cup-o-ramen and now you owe me a fedora
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Feb 7, 2016 23:26
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Oh Hell No posted:I recently lost what little respect I had for one of my coworkers. Seriously, it takes an incredible amount of sycophantism for a young single mother making twelve bucks an hour to agree with her boss that the minimum wage should be abolished because the free market. way to think like a poor my friend! while you're letting your hair grow and handing out pamphlets about socialism down at the local farmer's coop she's gonna be working hard and climbing the corporate ladder all the way to the top baby
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Feb 7, 2016 23:30
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