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Bitter Mushroom posted:you commute 2 hours a day and work in an office, sounds like u get owned eveery day nooner The price many must pay to live in major metropolitan areas gizmojumpjet posted:Electricity was out when I got to work today. Boss suggested we could work from home if we wanted. I said I'd leave if the power didn't come back on by 10:00 am. It came on at a quarter 'til so now I'm stuck here like some kinda caged animal. Perhaps a puma, or a leopard. that super sucks, what a cocktease of almost getting to go home
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Feb 22, 2016 20:05
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SLICK GOKU BABY posted:Home schooling can be really hard sometimes.
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Feb 22, 2016 20:05
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Nooner posted:that super sucks, what a cocktease of almost getting to go home It gets worse, my dear friend. There was a farewell reception today for basically the CEO of the organization and it was billed as having refreshments afterwards. The refreshments were loving punch, and there wasn't even any vodka or gin in it. I can't skip lunch on punch, I was hoping for a cheese and meat tray or something. FML.
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Feb 22, 2016 20:08
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Ein cooler Typ posted:The office is closed but they make you work anyway? lol
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Feb 22, 2016 20:11
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Feb 22, 2016 20:12
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Yeah, one time I thought I was going to be late for school so I rushed there and no one was there! It turned out it was a Saturday! Wait, that may have been an episode of Doug that I stole and created a fake memory from... ?
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Feb 22, 2016 20:13
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go suck some dicks, nooner!
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Feb 22, 2016 20:14
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Falun Bong Refugee posted:You commute 2 hours every day? That's rough.Been there. I commute almost 4 hours a day for a minimum wage temp job, kill me please.
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Feb 22, 2016 20:14
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Rambling Robot posted:I commute almost 4 hours a day for a minimum wage temp job, kill me please. Sounds like you are already dead.
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Feb 22, 2016 20:14
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dad gay. so what posted:go suck some dicks, nooner! dont sign your posts
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Feb 22, 2016 20:14
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Chinatown posted:dont sign your posts make me!
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Feb 22, 2016 20:16
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whats wrong with signing your posts?
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Feb 22, 2016 20:20
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Smash it Smash hit posted:whats wrong with signing your posts? its against the rules, and we sure wouldnt ever want to break a rule now would we 
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Feb 22, 2016 20:26
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gently caress da modz
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Feb 22, 2016 20:27
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Nooner posted:its against the rules, and we sure wouldnt ever want to break a rule now would we didnt know we had a buncha snitches on this forum smmfh
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Feb 22, 2016 20:27
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I was kidnapped from my home and traveled over 5000 miles in shackles. Now I work 18 hours a day against my will doing manual labor for no wages. 
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Feb 22, 2016 20:28
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got asked to cover someone's shift tonight, too big of a puss to say no.
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Feb 22, 2016 20:32
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i cant stop nodding and im going to kill myself lol
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Feb 22, 2016 20:33
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dad gay. so what posted:go suck some dicks, nooner! can you plz not talk about dicks? i'm having a rought time right now
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Feb 22, 2016 20:33
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Jerry Mumphrey posted:can you plz not talk about dicks? i'm having a rought time right now sry
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Feb 22, 2016 20:33
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dad gay. so what posted:i cant stop nodding and im going to kill myself lol it's a really comforting thought isnt it? suicide i mean
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Feb 22, 2016 20:35
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saw some dusty paw prints on my bedsheets this morning which means kitty went straight from the litter box to right beside my head and i may have been able to ignore the warning signs before but i definitely have toxoplasmosis
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Feb 22, 2016 20:35
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one time i went to sit on a couch and there was a child there i didn't see and the pressure from my weight caused all the kids organs to rocket out of the top of their skull in a blood geyser of sorts. boy was i red in the face!! (from embarrassment) (but also from the blood geyser)
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Feb 22, 2016 20:36
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32MB OF ESRAM posted:saw some dusty paw prints on my bedsheets this morning which means kitty went straight from the litter box to right beside my head and i may have been able to ignore the warning signs before but i definitely have toxoplasmosis i got that from leaving my tampon in to long 
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Feb 22, 2016 20:36
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My son got owned hard the other day. His buddy told him that if he wanted to see if his breath smells bad he just has to stick his finger to the back of his tounge and swab it, then smell it. He tried it and threw up! Lmao. (We had a good chuckle afterwards when I explained the massive ownage)
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Feb 22, 2016 20:50
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one time i was on the bus and this scruffy looking guy sneezed and i didn't want to catch his mesothelioma or lung aids or whatever he had goin on so i tried to hold my breath until the next stop and get off but the next stop was a ways away and i almost passed out but the lack of oxygen led me to the best orgasm i've ever had, really good bus wank session, but i did get owned because now i have lung aids
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Feb 22, 2016 20:56
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wanted a girl to give me the oral pleasures so I said lets 69. Turns out she wasn't blowing me, she just spit in her hand a lot while my face was in the cooter. she's saving blowjobs for her husband turns out
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Feb 22, 2016 20:58
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Chomp8645 posted:Sounds like you are already dead. i am, i get home, eat, post in gbs, and go to bed.
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Feb 22, 2016 21:02
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one time i farted in the elevator whooooopsss!!! 
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Feb 22, 2016 21:06
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MiracleWhale posted:one time i farted in the elevator whooooopsss!!! so ur the fat guy everyone hates.
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Feb 22, 2016 21:13
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OctoberBlues posted:Yeah, one time I thought I was going to be late for school so I rushed there and no one was there! It turned out it was a Saturday! turns out it what i thought was 6:15 in the morning was 3:15 in the morning and my mom was wondering why the hell i was taking a shower in the middle of the night that was an experience
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Feb 22, 2016 21:42
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symbolic posted:reminds me about how i was so mentally drained during my senior year of high school. i usually woke up around 6:00 to shower those days. well, i woke up one morning and saw my clock read ":15", so my first thought was "oh poo poo, i overslept and need to shower". so i jumped in the shower and started bathing but a few minutes later i heard someone banging on the bathroom door. truly
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Feb 22, 2016 21:53
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one time i was so drunk that i passed out and when i woke up it was 6:00 and i was like "gently caress this im calling in sick" and i left a voicemail for my boss. then i realized it was 6:00pm the night before and i fell over
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Feb 22, 2016 21:56
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One time I was so hungover I turned off my alarm and immediately fell back asleep and woke up like three hours later. I rushed to work thinking up an excuse since I hadn't even called in, but when I got there no one said anything and I just sat down and started working. I decided to push my luck by putting on my time card that I had been there all day and no one noticed that either. Good times. Except it was my mom's birthday that day and through all the craziness I forgot to wish her happy birthday. Only time I have ever forgotten.
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Feb 22, 2016 22:00
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dad gay. so what posted:one time i was so drunk that i passed out and when i woke up it was 6:00 and i was like "gently caress this im calling in sick" and i left a voicemail for my boss. then i realized it was 6:00pm the night before and i fell over *nods. Can't stop nodding
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Feb 22, 2016 22:01
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one time i got sentenced to prison for 37 months lol owned so hard
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Feb 22, 2016 22:01
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dad gay. so what posted:one time i was so drunk that i passed out and when i woke up it was 6:00 and i was like "gently caress this im calling in sick" and i left a voicemail for my boss. then i realized it was 6:00pm the night before and i fell over Lmao I have done this exact thing it was during summer when 6am looks the same as 6pm and I was like wtf how am I still so wasted no way I'm driving to loving Calabasas to work at the farmers market
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Feb 22, 2016 22:03
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I went in to work today only to find out I have to work a double tomorrow E: a real double. 16 hours. None of that restaurant industry 10 hour "doubles"
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Feb 22, 2016 22:03
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the great deceiver posted:one time i got sentenced to prison for 37 months lol owned so hard haha nice
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Feb 22, 2016 22:04
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One time my dad shot himself in my room lol he got his blood all over my stuff and I never came back to that house totally owned me irl!
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Feb 22, 2016 22:08
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