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logical phalluses
Mar 18, 2009

The living look upon the corpse with their eyesight,
But without eyesight lingers a different living and looks
curiously on the corpse.
sources say that former chicago bulls basketball player scottie pippen has spent the last 15 years tirelessly searching for the secrets behind the jonbenét ramsay murder case. he has finally cme to a conclusion regarding the identity of the killer and will reveal his findings tonight at 3 am. vote for trump

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logical phalluses
Mar 18, 2009

The living look upon the corpse with their eyesight,
But without eyesight lingers a different living and looks
curiously on the corpse.
please pray for her spirit and pray for scottie. he has been through hell and back

the great deceiver
Sep 23, 2003

why the feds worried bout me clockin on this corner/
when there's politicians out here gettin popped in arizona
i got the basketball jones

Hustlin Floh
Jul 20, 2009

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
I heard she was Katiey Perry

Seizure Meat
Jul 23, 2008

by Smythe
MJ forced Pippen to do steroids, SAS had a great thread about it awhile ago

Corn Glizzy
Jun 28, 2007



Larry Bird killed her with his rear end kiegels

the great deceiver
Sep 23, 2003

why the feds worried bout me clockin on this corner/
when there's politicians out here gettin popped in arizona

VikingSkull posted:

MJ forced Pippen to do steroids, SAS had a great thread about it awhile ago

i want to read this

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 10 years!

VikingSkull posted:

MJ forced Pippen to do steroids, SAS had a great thread about it awhile ago

I highly doubt Michael Jackson was into steroids. :colbert:

I think mj did that oj poo poo, just think about it..

ClamdestineBoyster fucked around with this message at 08:13 on Mar 1, 2016

A Concrete Divider
Jan 20, 2012

The Unbearable Whiteness of Eating
BOB SAGET DID IT

guidoanselmi
Feb 6, 2008

I thought my ideas were so clear. I wanted to make an honest post. No lies whatsoever.

what no goatse

Paul Revere 3000
Dec 8, 2007

So like a pimp I'm pimpin'
I got a boat to eat shrimp in
Nothing wrong with my leg
I'm just B-boy limpin'


I call him Scootie Poopen sometimes. It's pretty funny.

lonesomedwarf
Mar 22, 2010

lets die

Sponge Baathist
Jan 30, 2010

by FactsAreUseless
It was the parents

Orkin Mang
Nov 1, 2007

by FactsAreUseless

amityville anus posted:

It was the parents

but whose?

Kia Soul Enthusias
May 9, 2004

zoom-zoom
Toilet Rascal

amityville anus posted:

It was the parents

It wasn't her parents and the police really hosed up harassing them and losing the real killer, no joke.

Orkin Mang
Nov 1, 2007

by FactsAreUseless

CharlesM posted:

It wasn't her parents and the police really hosed up harassing them and losing the real killer, no joke.

whose parents do you think it was then?

Sponge Baathist
Jan 30, 2010

by FactsAreUseless
The parent(s) of the murderers child killed her

TOOT BOOT
May 25, 2010

it was that dude that cut his nuts off

Orkin Mang
Nov 1, 2007

by FactsAreUseless
i think it was some crazy drifter's parents

ScrubLeague
Feb 11, 2007

Nap Ghost
What ever happened to that Lorena Bobbitt thing

SEGA Ass Fisting
Feb 15, 2012

KEEP IT TIGHT!
He's on fire!

lonesomedwarf
Mar 22, 2010

ScrubLeague posted:

What ever happened to that Lorena Bobbitt thing

i know about this ferom mad magazine. i also know about the burma shave thing from that too. oh wait that was a ren and stimpy comic book

edit: i do know about richard nixon and russ perrot from mad magazine however

edit: ross

Joust
Dec 7, 2007

No Ledges.
Scottie Pippen takes off his hat and reveals a small skull sitting on his head.

Doctor Dogballs
Apr 1, 2007

driving the fuck truck from hand land to pound town without stopping at suction station


Joust posted:

Scottie Pippen takes off his hat and reveals a small skull sitting on his head.

then he rips off his own head and reveals a small hat sitting on his neck

BIG-DICK-BUTT-FUCK
Jan 26, 2016

by Fluffdaddy
Scottie Pippen is desperate for that reward....bankruptcy will do a number on a man

Ahundredbux
Oct 25, 2007

The right to bear arms
it was me the whole time!!

Jesus Christ
Jun 1, 2000

mods if you can make this my avatar I will gladly pay 10bux to the coffers

i didn't know Scotty Pippen was in The Wire

jenny jones fan
Dec 24, 2007

CharlesM posted:

It wasn't her parents and the police really hosed up harassing them and losing the real killer, no joke.

You do know that they determined the steange ransom note came from a notepad the family had been using, right?

Microwaves Mom
Nov 8, 2015

by zen death robot

Melmac posted:

You do know that they determined the steange ransom note came from a notepad the family had been using, right?

WHAT? THats impossible!

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless
Vanity Fair keeps writing articles about this super private eye that solves impossible cases. I bet he could solve this.

Mons Hubris
Aug 29, 2004

fanci flup :)


logical phalluses posted:

please pray for her spirit and pray for scottie. he has been through hell and back



That's Stallone, not Pippen

Microwaves Mom
Nov 8, 2015

by zen death robot
What if the Ramsay girl possessed scottie? And now is scottie.

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless

Microwaves Mom posted:

What if the Ramsay girl possessed scottie? And now is scottie.

You're thinking of Dennis rodman

Kia Soul Enthusias
May 9, 2004

zoom-zoom
Toilet Rascal

Melmac posted:

You do know that they determined the steange ransom note came from a notepad the family had been using, right?

No, and I can't find any mention about that anywhere, but if true, that's quite a smoking gun there, Detective. You do know the murderer was in the house, and could have taken the notepad, right? And that an unknown person's blood was all over the crime scene? If you're talking about the mother supposedly writing the note, that isn't true.

Orkin Mang
Nov 1, 2007

by FactsAreUseless
its possible that a third party was involved. if this is the case, then the first order of business is to alibi their parents.

Joust
Dec 7, 2007

No Ledges.

logical phalluses posted:

please pray for her spirit and pray for scottie. he has been through hell and back



H-holy poo poo!
Before....and AFTER!?!?!?

Drunk & Ugly
Feb 10, 2003

GIMME GIMME GIMME, DON'T ASK WHAT FOR

lonesomedwarf posted:

i know about this ferom mad magazine. i also know about the burma shave thing from that too. oh wait that was a ren and stimpy comic book

edit: i do know about richard nixon and russ perrot from mad magazine however

edit: ross

Tell us what u know

ANIME IS BLOOD
Sep 4, 2008

by zen death robot
scottie pippen you loving idiot everyone knows nobody killed jon benet ramsey, she grew up to be katy perry :rolleyes:

SMILLENNIALSMILLEN
Jun 26, 2009



I heard the parents did it for the insurance

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jenny jones fan
Dec 24, 2007

CharlesM posted:

No, and I can't find any mention about that anywhere, but if true, that's quite a smoking gun there, Detective. You do know the murderer was in the house, and could have taken the notepad, right? And that an unknown person's blood was all over the crime scene?

http://www.reviewjournal.com/news/nation-and-world/ex-police-chief-reveals-new-details-jonbenet-ramsey-murder

quote:

The day JonBenet was found dead, her mother Patsy claimed she found a 2.5-page handwritten ransom note in their home, demanding $118,000 for JonBenet’s return. The police later determined the note was written on paper from a notebook in the Ramseys’ house.

“No note has ever been written at the scene, and then left at the scene with the dead victim at the scene, other than this case.”

I'm sure the murderer sat there for forty minutes writing a note, just hoping no one would wake up to pee during that time I guess.

As for the third party DNA, supposedly it was such a miniscule amount that it literally could have came from the factory worker that made the clothing in a sweatshop overseas. Where did you get that the murderer's blood was "all over the crime scene"?

Maybe, just maybe it's the most logical and least complicated scenario: the brother, with a known violent temper problem, killed her in a fit of rage after a possible molestation attempt (it was confirmed her and her brother both had sealed mental history files after she was molested previously), and the parents covered it up not because they're murderers but because they didn't want to lose two children?

But yeah someone totally broke into the house (by smashing a window it was proved no one climbed through), killed the girl, wrote a 2 and a half page ransom note on the family stationary, for some reason wrote the ransom note but left her dead in the house while writing the note, for some reason put really loose rope around her hands that was obviously placed there to make it look like she was bound even though she wasn't, etc.

I'm not saying they should be in jail, since there has never been solid proof, but lol if the ransom note being written on their stationary and it taking up 3 sheets of paper isn't damning to you and you still think they didn't know the truth.

Also lol that you seem to know literally nothing about the case (in fact you're posting stuff that didn't even happen) but don't let that stop you from acting like a smug goon about it.

jenny jones fan fucked around with this message at 15:09 on Mar 1, 2016

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