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FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

[SERIOUS] [EMERGENCY] I (22M) saw somebody. Guy(?) in a coat.
submitted 3 hours ago by nsf001

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FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

[UPDATE] I (22M) thought I saw somebody. Must be a homeless guy.
submitted 2 hours ago by nsf001

Black Baby Goku
Apr 2, 2011

by Nyc_Tattoo
Huh?? Whose footprints are these??

Black Baby Goku
Apr 2, 2011

by Nyc_Tattoo
Hmmm. Just the wind.

Accordion Man
Nov 7, 2012


Buglord
Patrolling the Mojave makes you wish for a nuclear winter. #warneverchanges

Cowcaster
Aug 7, 2002



[ATTENTION] Post your latest login/password changes here
Pages: 1234567... Last

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

Black Baby Goku posted:

Hmmm. Just the wind.
NOT the wind!
posted 35 minutes ago by genome-you-didnt | 32 likes
That was NOT the wind! The same thing happened to a buddy of mine and he got tranq'd.
>>>>> re: NOT the wind!
>>>>> posted 29 minutes ago by bandanaman72 | 4 likes
>>>>> That's an urban legend. It was definitely the wind. Just relax and continue your patrol.

Lumpy the Cook
Feb 4, 2011

Drippy-goo-yay, mother-gunker!
Achtung!

Lumpy the Cook fucked around with this message at 22:55 on Mar 15, 2016

Accordion Man
Nov 7, 2012


Buglord
Should we gather for whiskey and cigars tonight?

Black Baby Goku
Apr 2, 2011

by Nyc_Tattoo

FactsAreUseless posted:

NOT the wind!
posted 35 minutes ago by genome-you-didnt | 32 likes
That was NOT the wind! The same thing happened to a buddy of mine and he got tranq'd.
>>>>> re: NOT the wind!
>>>>> posted 29 minutes ago by bandanaman72 | 4 likes
>>>>> That's an urban legend. It was definitely the wind. Just relax and continue your patrol.

Listen, I walk the same foot path around this hanger 8 hours a day and yeah I'm not perfect, I tend to fall asleep on my feet (Christ these Alaskan winters are brutal) and let me just tell you, I definitely saw someone hiding under a tank today and when I went to check, he was gone.

Black Baby Goku
Apr 2, 2011

by Nyc_Tattoo
Guys, I know we said this before but it needs to be restated: if you see a cardboard box in the middle of the hallway, go up close to it, but don't bother lifting it up... That's the night shifts job.

Ice Fist
Jun 20, 2012

^^ Please send feedback to beefstache911@hotmail.com, this is not a joke that 'stache is the real deal. Serious assessments only. ^^

Command. Be advised. I saw a cardboard box move. Should I investigate?

Big Mad Drongo
Nov 10, 2006

Discussion > Mooks On The Job > OSHA Thread Mark IV: Your boss CANNOT make you stack explosive barrels near load-bearing struts

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

Accordion Man posted:

Should we gather for whiskey and cigars tonight?
When are the mods going to start giving out the CIGAR CREW gang tags? Can things get any worse?

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

Just saw a guy crawling through an air vent. Will hang out near the exit and report back.

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

FactsAreUseless posted:

Just saw a guy crawling through an air vent. Will hang out near the exit and report back.
At medic station, lost fingat.

Ice Fist
Jun 20, 2012

^^ Please send feedback to beefstache911@hotmail.com, this is not a joke that 'stache is the real deal. Serious assessments only. ^^

Didn't there use to be like six other guards around here somewhere?

eonwe
Aug 11, 2008



Lipstick Apathy
where did you guys get the markov bots!!!!!!!!!

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

Does anyone know how to block PMs from a user? I don't care if "Icarus has found me" but I'm sick of hearing about it.

Accordion Man
Nov 7, 2012


Buglord

FactsAreUseless posted:

Does anyone know how to block PMs from a user? I don't care if "Icarus has found me" but I'm sick of hearing about it.
I don't know about that, but some dipshit's been throwing around the vending machines. I bet its that rear end in a top hat Tim.

Orv
May 4, 2011
Post this is Unit 28, heard suspicious whistling in dark, secluded bushes, will check out on own without informing squad.

Kraven Moorhed
Jan 5, 2006

So wrong, yet so right.

Soiled Meat
smashthestate

Kraven Moorhed
Jan 5, 2006

So wrong, yet so right.

Soiled Meat

Kraven Moorhed posted:

smashthestate

poo poo, that's not the password box. I'm already logged in?

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

E/N > plz don't jump on my head
Pages: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, ... Last

plz don't jump on my head, ok, plz don't do that anymore, don't jump on my head and my shell

plz

don't do that

exquisite tea
Apr 21, 2007

Carly shook her glass, willing the ice to melt. "You still haven't told me what the mission is."

She leaned forward. "We are going to assassinate the bad men of Hollywood."


Thanks for the offer, but I think I'll stand guard here for a little while longer. Started taking extra shifts to help put my baby girl through college. I don't get to see my family a whole lot, but I know they're proud of the work I put in to support them.

elf help book
Aug 5, 2004

Though the battle might be endless, I will never give up
Ask Me About Holding a Rare Drop

Orv
May 4, 2011
Welcome to Henchchat!
>
>
>
MOTD: Don't forget to check all suspicious persons found in unauthorized ares!
>
>
>
22:34 March 15, 2016


[22:34] 2smart4thiefs: hey guys i just saw a weird guy go into the warehouse im workin at should i check it
[22:35] fststrentacopitw: nah man they aint payin you enuf
[22:35] Combine2382: last time a guy did that he got killed by a toilet
[22:37] FisherKiller1337: just start yellin you know hes in there itll scare his rear end out
[22:38] 2smart4thiefs: i gotta check it out guys, theyre countin on me
[22:40] 2smart4thiefs: i hear him man hes in the fuckin armory

> 2smart4thiefs has disconnected, remote connection closed by client

--------------------------------------------------------------

23:12 March 15, 2016

> 2smart4thiefs has connected

[23:12] 2smart4thiefs: I totally got him guys, snuck up behind him and shot him in the head. Didn't know what hit him!
[23:12] FisherKiller1337: you alright man you typin kinda funny
[23:15] 2smart4thiefs: yeah man yeah just excited you know gonna get a big bonus

----------------------------------------------------------------

[23:43] 2smart4thiefs; Yeah can you believe this rear end in a top hat saved his IRC password, every guard in the facility uses this thing. I've got the nuke, I'm on my way out.
[23:43] sonofpatriots1775: !!!

Orv fucked around with this message at 00:02 on Mar 16, 2016

Lumpy the Cook
Feb 4, 2011

Drippy-goo-yay, mother-gunker!
Schutzstaffel

El Diablo Bob O
Sep 3, 2011

Hay nada mas,
Oh si' my way!
Oh poo poo, they got Alex!

They ain't gettin' me!

Noun Verber
Oct 12, 2006

Cool party, guys.
!

SilentW
Apr 3, 2009

my It dept hgere is fucking clwonshoes, and as someone hwo used to do IT for 9 years it pains me to see them fbe so terriuble
Do you think you'll get your own squad after what happened last week?

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

PROBATION | Mook4Sanders2016 | Shot with a tranquilizer dart. User loses consciousness for 6 minutes. | JesusChristDenton | jmanderley

ThisIsACoolGuy
Nov 2, 2010

Shaped like a friend

d o n ' t a t t a c k m y e y e s

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

HOLY poo poo CLICK THIS VIDEO [HILARIOUS] [AWKWARD] [LMAO]

I know a security guy at the Gold Saucer. Remember those AVALANCHE shitlords who trolled us last week? The big black [EDIT: Can I say that? Someone weigh in. HueyNewtonianPhysics? ShinraYourShoes90?] one went on a date with the skinny suspenders guy. We got the whole thing on tape!

Check it out!

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

FactsAreUseless posted:

HOLY poo poo CLICK THIS VIDEO [HILARIOUS] [AWKWARD] [LMAO]

I know a security guy at the Gold Saucer. Remember those AVALANCHE shitlords who trolled us last week? The big black [EDIT: Can I say that? Someone weigh in. HueyNewtonianPhysics? ShinraYourShoes90?] one went on a date with the skinny suspenders guy. We got the whole thing on tape!

Check it out!
lmao dammit I clicked! gently caress!

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

Oh poo poo, was that Hojo? Haha, gently caress, MAKOutKing, you're so getting experimented on.

Accordion Man
Nov 7, 2012


Buglord
PRAISE KEFKA! HE IS THE LIGHT OF JUDGEMENT! REPENT SINNERS!

Internet Kraken
Apr 24, 2010

slightly amused
Guys I got my new patrol route and it just goes straight through a wall. Am I supposed to just walk in place against it or something?

EDIT: nvm turns out you can just clip through it

Internet Kraken fucked around with this message at 01:55 on Mar 16, 2016

Dial A For Awesome
May 23, 2009
Well I know a party of intruders are murdering the group of my coworkers near the entrance of this room, but I'm not getting involved unless they come within 20 yards of me. Union rules I'm afraid.

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FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

Forums > Main > Henchman Headaches > very scared of jumping man

i am scared of the jumping man. i am hiding in pipe until he leaves. he will not find me in here. plz help, friends.

EDIT: oh no he is on the pipe

EDIT 2: ow

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