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Gatts
Jan 2, 2001

Goodnight Moon

Nap Ghost
It would be amusing if this backfires and turns into a Clinton where Cruz ends up beloved for getting side action and being a smoothing operator.

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I'm Crap
Aug 15, 2001

Rodenthar Drothman posted:

Hm. Guess maybe I should actually read the articles.

(HAHAHAHAHAHA no.)
holy poo poo, shut up idiot lmao

Libelous Slander
May 1, 2009

... you're just creepy ...
some nerd has sex and suddenly gbs is in an uproar? color me shocked

Onkel Hedwig
Jun 27, 2007


Your Dunkle Sans posted:



You are now mentally picturing Ted Cruz's orgasm face.

Toadvine
Mar 16, 2009
Please disregard my advice w/r/t history.

Gatts posted:

It would be amusing if this backfires and turns into a Clinton where Cruz ends up beloved for getting side action and being a smoothing operator.

Why does everyone keep saying this? Not happening. Cruz is a vicious rodent who lords his morality over everyone.

No-one likes him.

Any excuse to shame and belittle this dirtbag will be welcomed, even by people usually above this sort of muck.

Moon Atari
Dec 26, 2010

Man even ted cruz is getting more action than me I seriously need to change my lifestyle this poo poo is completely unacceptable.

loquacius
Oct 21, 2008

Gatts posted:

It would be amusing if this backfires and turns into a Clinton where Cruz ends up beloved for getting side action and being a smoothing operator.

It would but it won't

The people who wanted to tattoo a red "A" on Clinton's forehead and send him to literal adultery jail are the same people who have been voting for Cruz

Maoist Pussy
Feb 12, 2014

by Lowtax
Hell yeah, Teddy lad, pound that booty!

Germstore
Oct 17, 2012

A Serious Candidate For a Serious Time
Ted Cruz gets strange on side, but doesn't want us to get strange on side. Bad.
Trump probably cheated like a billion times, but if you get strange on side he gives you high five. Good.

Lumpy the Cook
Feb 4, 2011

Drippy-goo-yay, mother-gunker!
Lyin' Cheatin' Ted

Redmanred
Aug 29, 2005

My hometown japan
:japan:
Ted in bed

SEGA Ass Fisting
Feb 15, 2012

KEEP IT TIGHT!
Cruzin for poosay

Libelous Slander
May 1, 2009

... you're just creepy ...
Bernie on the street, Ted in the sheets

T.S. Smelliot
Apr 23, 2010

by FactsAreUseless

BunnySkull posted:

Trump is a master troll, he hired one of Cruz's former ho's, Katrina Pierson, as one of his spokeholes. He's basically been taunting Cruz by putting her on CNN for months. LOL. No wonder Cruz kept his mouth shut about Trump for so long, he was being not-so-subtly threatened by Kate Pierson's visage on TV all the time.

Wow. I also can't believe six actual women slept with that creepy, disgusting SOB.

Holy poo poo if this is true :laffo:

Philosopher King
Oct 25, 2006
Is ted cruz the one everyome thinks is the zodiac killer for some reason?

BunnySkull
Jan 28, 2005

TABLOID JUNKIE
UNIDENTIFIED SOURCES SAID IT SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Interesting, a story coming out about Cruz super PAC donating half a mil to Carly Fiorina's campaign. Apparently one of the six Cruz sex having women worked for Fiorina. (ETA: It was Flores, who worked as a Fiorina deputy campaign manager. God the amount of his ho's who have used this as leverage to get jobs at other campaigns or as "experts" on CNN is goddamned hilarious. Cruz must have been sweating bullets for months.) Reeks of hush money.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news...48315&tid=ss_tw

What I never understand is how presidential campaigns think they could keep these stories under wraps. It if was ONE woman, maybe, but three, four, five, six..women? No loving way.

BunnySkull fucked around with this message at 18:31 on Mar 25, 2016

CharlestonJew
Jul 7, 2011

Illegal Hen
only five?

this man doesn't deserve to be president, if you're gonna be an adulterer you gotta bring your A-game son

Ferdinand Bardamu
Apr 30, 2013

Your Dunkle Sans posted:



You are now mentally picturing Ted Cruz's orgasm face.

i'll do you one better:

BunnySkull
Jan 28, 2005

TABLOID JUNKIE
UNIDENTIFIED SOURCES SAID IT SO IT MUST BE TRUE!

Philosopher King posted:

Is ted cruz the one everyome thinks is the zodiac killer for some reason?

Ain't no thinking about it, he is the zodiac killer.

loquacius
Oct 21, 2008

Heidi Cruz looks kind of like the mom from That 70s Show

Burt Sexual
Jan 26, 2006

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Switchblade Switcharoo
Is Cruzes wife hot like trumps?

The Brown Menace
Dec 24, 2010

Now comes in all colors.


https://twitter.com/Vicious2707/status/713395958445252609?s=09

welp

Hector Beerlioz
Jun 16, 2010

aw, hec

Darth123123 posted:

Is Cruzes wife hot like trumps?

No, trump called her ugly on twitter and Ted got really peeved

welcome 2 Clown Town
Aug 1, 2006

GALAXY'S #2 SCULL*!

*scrunt skull
politicians getting side action is not really news

but it is when you are the "evangelical" candidate who just got in a twitter fight over your wife with trump

lol

what a ballass

i know cruz is gonna deny it up and down but its gonna follow him for sure

etalian
Mar 20, 2006

Darth123123 posted:

Is Cruzes wife hot like trumps?

She more hot in the Stepford Wife type of way

loquacius
Oct 21, 2008

Darth123123 posted:

Is Cruzes wife hot like trumps?

Dude I just painted you a word picture, she is basically Kitty from That 70s Show with an updated hairstyle


Prokhor Zakharov
Dec 31, 2008

This is me as I make another great post


Good luck with your depression!

he's a family guy

Germstore
Oct 17, 2012

A Serious Candidate For a Serious Time

loquacius posted:

Dude I just painted you a word picture, she is basically Kitty from That 70s Show with an updated hairstyle




Would stick my dick in one of these womens.

The Brown Menace
Dec 24, 2010

Now comes in all colors.


etalian posted:

She more hot in the Stepford Wife type of way

Goldman Wife

etalian
Mar 20, 2006

The_Book_Of_Harry
Apr 30, 2013


5

Blazing Ownager
Jun 2, 2007

by FactsAreUseless

Young Freud posted:

True, but this whole loving election season has been some hosed-up Twilight Zone bullshit, where we talking about various Republican candidates penis sizes on the mainstream news and the front-runner has been a multi-marriage adulterer who bragged about his daughter's attractiveness by bring up his desire to have sex with her.

I wouldn't be surprised if this was leaked from Cruz's camp.

Trump better win so we can head towards our glorious future

Ferdinand Bardamu
Apr 30, 2013
re: heidi cruz

she's batshit. can't stump the trump!

frodnonnag
Aug 13, 2007
I figured ted would be more along the lines of BBL gimp, poop/abdl, or good ol c&b torture. He always had the look of 'im smiling, but i just pooped and/or touched myself' half frown.

Young Freud
Nov 26, 2006

WaryWarren posted:

re: heidi cruz

she's batshit. can't stump the trump!



So, is this the bombshell about Heidi Cruz or did Trump have to drop the infidelity bomb earlier than expected?

Professor Shark
May 22, 2012

I feel that if I were a Presidential Candidate and Texan Senator that I could have more affairs with better women than Cruz did

Germstore
Oct 17, 2012

A Serious Candidate For a Serious Time

WaryWarren posted:

re: heidi cruz

she's batshit. can't stump the trump!



Rude. This seems like a perfectly normal reaction to waking up one day and realizing you're married to Ted Cruz.

SEGA Ass Fisting
Feb 15, 2012

KEEP IT TIGHT!


Ted Cruz's wife looks like a busted Kathryn Hahn

NihilistCanada
Sep 11, 2001

If you tremble indignation at every injustice then you are a comrade of mine.
So our boy's got game? Good for him. :canada:

Can't wait for President Trump. Gonna be 8 awesome years of world class trolling.

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Microwaves Mom
Nov 8, 2015

by zen death robot

PuppiesAndKitties posted:

brb joining a convent

(not really though)

you know that man is a mad pussy eating goblin. He aint afraid to eat his own boogers so I'm sure he loves to lick and nibble.

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