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Doo de doo. I'm a normal whitebread guy who lives in New York City. I work in an office with a very serious boss. I have a fiancée and a nice apartment, yet I feel unfulfilled. What the... I almost ran over that pack od cartoon squirrels! Holy poo poo, they can talk! My life is about to be turned upside down!
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Apr 12, 2016 19:26
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| # ? Apr 26, 2024 00:32 |
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Oh man, because of these cartoon squirrels, I missed a very important dinner date with my fiancé, now she's mad at me!
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Apr 12, 2016 19:27
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The acid is kicking in fast for sure man, dont take any more (classic mistake) and go enjoy a park or something, look at the sky, think happy thoughts, and above all consider that no matter the good / bad things you have done in this world, you are here for a reason, and to be happy for it.
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Apr 12, 2016 19:28
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i wish i could take some drugs so i could not be on planet earth for just five loving seconds god drat it legalize this poo poo already you loving pigs
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Apr 12, 2016 19:29
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For some convoluted reason, I have to take these cartoon squirrels to work with me. I just hope my boss doesn't find out because he hates squirrels! I'm going to put them in my drawer and then leave them unsupervised while I go to this important meeting.
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Apr 12, 2016 19:30
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Applewhite posted:Oh man, because of these cartoon squirrels, I missed a very important dinner date with my fiancé, now she's mad at me! you better hide those squirrels from her because she would never understand! hope you are good at excuse-making.
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Apr 12, 2016 19:30
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Howard Beale posted:you better hide those squirrels from her because she would never understand! hope you are good at excuse-making. I'll try to tell her the truth but get interrupted by the squirrels before I can. Oh man she just found out about the squirrels on her own and thinks I lied to her. WHAT DO I DO??
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Apr 12, 2016 19:32
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i'd prolly get wrapped up in some kind of adventure
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Apr 12, 2016 19:32
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  Hmmm, I'm ok with this.
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Apr 12, 2016 19:32
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Your fiancée clearly isn't right for you. But that shy, approachable attractive lady from work who helped keep your squirrels from being smashed by your boss sure seems nice...
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Apr 12, 2016 19:33
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*safe drops on my head* *paramedics pronounce me dead on site* *funeral turns into a laugh riot as the toons use my corpse for their zany ventriloquist act*
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Apr 12, 2016 19:33
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that's not real
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Apr 12, 2016 19:33
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I sure hope these squirrels don't kill anyone while they try to operate my car as a team.
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Apr 12, 2016 19:33
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Applewhite posted:I sure hope these squirrels don't kill anyone while they try to operate my car as a team. A good lawyer could get you off
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Apr 12, 2016 19:35
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Applewhite posted:I'll try to tell her the truth but get interrupted by the squirrels before I can. Oh man she just found out about the squirrels on her own and thinks I lied to her. WHAT DO I DO?? tell her they were a surprise for her birthday!
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Apr 12, 2016 19:35
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What's this? Nuts?? I'm allergic to nuts! They make my face swell up so I look stupid and can't talk!
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Apr 12, 2016 19:36
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Howard Beale posted:tell her they were a surprise for her birthday! They're your problem now!
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Apr 12, 2016 19:36
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*Comes home to find Schmorky in a diaper laying on the floor, trying to look sexy.*
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Apr 12, 2016 19:37
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Whatever you do, don't comically eat the bowl of mixed nuts right before your presentation to the big client. That could make or break your career.
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Apr 12, 2016 19:39
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These squirrels are tearing up my apartment! I'm so mad! Aw man but now I feel guilty for shouting at them even though they're a destructive nuisance that came to my house uninvited.
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Apr 12, 2016 19:41
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poisonpill posted:Whatever you do, don't comically eat the bowl of mixed nuts right before your presentation to the big client. That could make or break your career. I lost the big client. My job is hanging by a thread! It all comes down to the secret personal project I've been developing for years but don't have the confidence to implement.
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Apr 12, 2016 19:44
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Applewhite posted:I lost the big client. Don't worry. I bet your zany squirrel friends are concocting a wild adventure on convincing your client to go with you, because you have a heart of gold.
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Apr 12, 2016 19:46
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Somebody with an evil mustache and monocle etc offers you a million dollars for the talking cartoon squirrels so that he can do something evil with them like make them part of his evil carnival sideshow or vivisect them. You initially agree to his offer but later renege because dammit those squirrels are so darned cute. The evil guy kidnaps (squirrelnaps? gently caress off) the squirrels and now you have to rescue them even though this will make your boss and fiancee really mad for some reason.
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Apr 12, 2016 19:47
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These animals have cost you your career, your relationship, and your sanity. It's time to put them down, imo
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Apr 12, 2016 19:47
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loinburger posted:Somebody with an evil mustache and monocle etc offers you a million dollars for the talking cartoon squirrels so that he can do something evil with them like make them part of his evil carnival sideshow or vivisect them. You initially agree to his offer but later renege because dammit those squirrels are so darned cute. The evil guy kidnaps (squirrelnaps? gently caress off) the squirrels and now you have to rescue them even though this will make your boss and fiancee really mad for some reason. I've been trying to get rid of these squirrels for the whole movie, but now that I'm finally about to be free of the little pests, they look really sad at me out the back window of the evil van and I know that I was the jerk all along.
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Apr 12, 2016 19:49
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It sounds like these cartoon squirrels will help you learn what you really care about. They will cause you to lose your fiance and your job but in the end they will inspire you to strike out on your own and will introduce you to your soul mate.
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Apr 12, 2016 19:50
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Have the squirrels made any "topical" (actually outdated by at least three years) pop culture references yet?
Mordja fucked around with this message at 19:53 on Apr 12, 2016 |
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Apr 12, 2016 19:50
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It will be okay, there's going to be a big musical number up soon and it will all work out.
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Apr 12, 2016 19:51
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Mordja posted:Have the squirrels made any "topical" (actually outdated by at least three years) references yet? Yes, the girl squirrel sang a Beyoncé song and did a sexually provocative dance that made me feel slightly queasy. Also the squirrels did a Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas reference for some reason?
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Apr 12, 2016 19:52
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poisonpill posted:These animals have cost you your career, your relationship, and your sanity. It's time to put them down, imo there is only one thing to be done with filthy toons  
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Apr 12, 2016 19:52
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nope, i am not going to do it, i am not. *squirrels show big doe eyes* no.. uh.. definitely *squirrels give my legs a hug* fine i'll do it
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Apr 12, 2016 19:53
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Do... do the squirrels have access to movies in the cartoon forest?
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Apr 12, 2016 19:53
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i can't imagine your house pet (presumably a cat) appreciates these new animated guests.
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Apr 12, 2016 19:54
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scott zoloft posted:i can't imagine your house pet (presumably a cat) appreciates these new animated guests. He tried to eat them but they ended up tricking it into falling out a window.
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Apr 12, 2016 19:55
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That's okay. Your cat will be seen again wearing a full body cast in the end credits stinger.
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Apr 12, 2016 19:56
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These squirrels are driving me nuts!! (this is also the film's tagline)
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Apr 12, 2016 19:58
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Why did you build so many Rube Goldberg contraptions into your apartment? They all seem to spectacularly fail at their purpose and now you've just got eggs on your floor or whatever.
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Apr 12, 2016 20:05
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Please don't make a corny joke.
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Apr 12, 2016 20:06
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The framework of this situation dictates that you determine the squirrels motivation for leaving their normal lives and harassing you. Is there are a megacorporation tearing down their cartoon forest?
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Apr 12, 2016 20:09
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Ha! After all these hijinks I've finally learned to loosen up a little. Take that uptight bossman, I'm walking away from my responsibilities entirely into a new life of relaxing and laughing more!
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Apr 12, 2016 20:09
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