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Henchman of Santa posted:Holy Christ, for sheer volume of poo poo that didn't happen, this is unbeatable. Does anyone have the responses to this? Does this guy still post here? HypeTelecon kept posting for years, usually in the IT threads. No idea if he's still around though. I had the original thread bookmarked a couple of computers back, and it's killing me that I can't find it.
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Apr 19, 2016 06:24
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ibntumart posted:
What an utterly disgusting human being. I don't care if it's STDH, why the hell would anyone make that poo poo up? All it does is make him look like a complete and utter creep. Anyway, content! I'm sure this has been posted in every iteration if this thread in the past, but I love it! NAR posted:More Buffoon Than Buff
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Apr 19, 2016 08:58
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Tiny stdh  Dude's upset over SJWs ruining a FFIX Role Playing group.
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Apr 19, 2016 11:09
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Golden Goat posted:Tiny stdh I actually have no problem believing that an online role-play group based on a JRPG got into an argument over non-binary interpretations of a character and everyone overreacted. hyperhazard posted:HypeTelecon kept posting for years, usually in the IT threads. No idea if he's still around though. And now I learn that I had a HypeTelecon underwater city thread-shaped hole in my heart all this time. Please don't give up on this quest---his replies to comments on the story have got to be solid gold.
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Apr 19, 2016 14:53
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AlbieQuirky posted:The restaurant said it happened, the waitress said it happened. Not clear how much fact-checking you can do beyond that. I would just have not run the story. Years ago, you might've asked for her bank statement and a look at the restaurant's books in order to verify what went down. The restaurant would also have record of the customer's name because a credit card was used--wouldn't have been tough to track him down (even if he did ask to remain anonymous, this would obviously be for fact-checking purposes, not to put in the story). The restaurant saying "uumm yeah that happened" is a no-brainer because it's free advertising from a major TV network. But no let's just run every STDH that will get us pageviews and ad impressions because that's what journalism is now
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Apr 19, 2016 15:26
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I can't check the link to be certain because I lack archives, but some goon said this was the original HypeTelecon thread. http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2769640 According to them, HypeTelecon did not post any follow-up in it though. 
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Apr 19, 2016 15:26
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Reminds me of that goon that posted ridiculous stories about him working at a hotel and he was basically James Bond. He would play piano, beat people up and drive Lambo's over 100mph. The goons ate it up for a long time before the pushback became too great and he hit the eject button.
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Apr 19, 2016 16:11
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Trebek posted:Reminds me of that goon that posted ridiculous stories about him working at a hotel and he was basically James Bond. He would play piano, beat people up and drive Lambo's over 100mph. The goons ate it up for a long time before the pushback became too great and he hit the eject button. Adam Bowen?
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Apr 19, 2016 16:16
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Trebek posted:Reminds me of that goon that posted ridiculous stories about him working at a hotel and he was basically James Bond. He would play piano, beat people up and drive Lambo's over 100mph. The goons ate it up for a long time before the pushback became too great and he hit the eject button. My general rule with those types of old GBS posters who made entire threads about the crazy stories they have is that they're all STDH.
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Apr 19, 2016 16:22
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Nyarai posted:I can't check the link to be certain because I lack archives, but some goon said this was the original HypeTelecon thread. On the other hand, I do have archives and can confirm that not only is that the right thread, HypeTelecon posted a few replies. Truly this is a day of bounties!
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Apr 19, 2016 16:33
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Lucrece posted:Anyway, content! I'm sure this has been posted in every iteration if this thread in the past, but I love it!
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Apr 19, 2016 17:27
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Nyarai posted:I can't check the link to be certain because I lack archives, but some goon said this was the original HypeTelecon thread. Holy poo poo, you found it! I'd forgotten how beautiful it was, especially when he doubled down. HypeTelecon posted:Anyways, why are you people dissin' the tux so much? If you had a chance to have ANY suit purchased for you...you're saying you WOULDN'T get a full-on tux? I thought I looked drat skippy in it! Yeah, I could've gone for a snappy Armani ensemble, but would've only paled in comparison to Ahmed's Brioni suit...and I seriously doubt things would've gone over well with accounting if I had charged a suit that can be worth as much as $25,000 after tailoring!
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Apr 19, 2016 17:28
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ibntumart posted:I posted it in the last thread. Thought I put the link to where I found it in that post, but I guess not. Still, it's archived online in at least a couple of places. Boofchicken posted:Does anyone have the story of the guy who had a job where he did nothing and kept collecting pay checks? Like he would go into work, but not actually do anything because his actual job got "lost" in the system and he was on the payroll with no oversight. Here's an archived version: https://sites.google.com/site/forgottenemployee/
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Apr 19, 2016 18:16
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Verisimilidude posted:My general rule with those types of old GBS posters who made entire threads about the crazy stories they have is that they're all STDH. Until recently, I assumed everyone knew they were made-up. Entertaining as hell, but fiction nonetheless. The images of flaming street sweepers careening down a highway, an elderly security guard magdumping into a priceless tribal wooden carving because some jokers rigged up a dead snake in front of it, and a guy getting lost by HR and continuing to be paid despite having no job duties are really cool, but at the end of the day, you know they're not true. I seriously thought that everyone in those threads was just egging the storyteller on by asking what happened next, gushing compliments, etc. Haha nope, people actually thought a guy secured his home with an elaborate R/C car "lock" and opened a bathroom door to find a man lying in fecal lasagna holding a saxophone seriously goons what the gently caress
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Apr 19, 2016 18:20
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Trebek posted:Reminds me of that goon that posted ridiculous stories about him working at a hotel and he was basically James Bond. He would play piano, beat people up and drive Lambo's over 100mph. The goons ate it up for a long time before the pushback became too great and he hit the eject button. Was that the same goon that ended up either dying young of a heartattack or committing suicide? I seem to remember him as being a GBS superstar and something to do with hotels... GOTTA STAY FAI posted:Until recently, I assumed everyone knew they were made-up. Entertaining as hell, but fiction nonetheless. The images of flaming street sweepers careening down a highway, an elderly security guard magdumping into a priceless tribal wooden carving because some jokers rigged up a dead snake in front of it, and a guy getting lost by HR and continuing to be paid despite having no job duties are really cool, but at the end of the day, you know they're not true. I seriously thought that everyone in those threads was just egging the storyteller on by asking what happened next, gushing compliments, etc. Haha nope, people actually thought a guy secured his home with an elaborate R/C car "lock" and opened a bathroom door to find a man lying in fecal lasagna holding a saxophone seriously goons what the gently caress
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Apr 19, 2016 19:10
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The ones you've all been waiting for: Cloudcuckoolanders are here now. Spoons quote:This troper is a Cloudcuckoolander, if a rather anti-social one. To date, some of her more cuckoolandery hijinks are: sharpening spoons to use as weapons in case of a zombie apocalypse; coming up with an elaborate conspiracy that involved the government contracting a mercenary army of raccoons to assassinate her; starting a blood feud with the squirrel that lives in her front yard; making a utopia city by using the dirt and clay from her mother's front garden; and last but not least, going to a costume party as a semi-colon, while her equally crazy friend went as an exclamation point, half way through the party, staged an elaborate argument that made it seem like a giant semi-colon and found her giant exclamation point boyfriend cheating on her with the Tooth Fairy. I Am Not Making This Up. Letters quote:This troper, since birth. When she was a kid, she'd look at the letters of the alphabet and think they had emotions (A looked happy, B looked kinda pissed off, C looked happy etc.). Come to think of it, she still kinda sees it. Also, one time her iPod headphones were knocked off and she shouted "My glasses!". And those are just specific cases she can remember at the moment. She constantly goes into Brief Accent Imitation, gives aside glances to an invisible "camera", and has really weird crushes... Evita quote:This troper had a high school Spanish teacher that also fell into this trope. She had a tendency to break into song spontaneously, especially Evita (one time, in fact, the principal came into her room as she was erasing the blackboard and singing "Don't Cry For Me, Argentina." The principal just watched for a while. Also, she had a fetish for plastic vegetables, most notably a supposedly "Happy Asparagus" that she threw at people who acted out in class. I could not even make this stuff up.
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Apr 19, 2016 20:44
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Letters troper posted:gives aside glances to an invisible "camera" I want to murder this person.
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Apr 19, 2016 20:49
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Khazar-khum posted:Letters I was going to refute the hell out of the synesthesia thing because who doesn't see things like that when they're a little kid? Except when I looked it up, that actually is a symptom. So, the bad news is it turns out that numerals actually didn't have genders ca. 1985. Good news is, y'all can go ahead and put on your resumés that you know someone on the internet who used to be legit ~qUiRkY~ and ~sPeCiAl~
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Apr 19, 2016 22:12
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Finding out that something about you is a bit weird can be startling! Once in the changing room before practice I made fun of one of the guys for not having shoulder dimples and that's how I found out I was the weird one.
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Apr 19, 2016 22:17
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What happens when you try to sue a supermarket chain based on an stdh. http://www.statesman.com/news/business/whole-foods-taking-legal-action-against-cake-accus/nq7qt/
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Apr 19, 2016 23:04
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Paladinus posted:What happens when you try to sue a supermarket chain based on an stdh. 1.a man asks for a cake with words on it 2.evil bakery employee writes slur on it 3.man comes to pick up cake, sees message 4.man pays for it as indignantly as possible 5.social media
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Apr 19, 2016 23:49
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Paladinus posted:This is my story, actually. EvilHawk posted:Here's an archived version: Thanks a ton. And you write an entertaining story Paladinus, I just figured this was the best thread to find it again.
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Apr 20, 2016 00:39
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Boofchicken posted:Thanks a ton. It was a joke about me doing gently caress all at work. Unfortunately, I am in no way responsible for this gem.
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Apr 20, 2016 00:42
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Palisader posted:Was that the same goon that ended up either dying young of a heartattack or committing suicide? I seem to remember him as being a GBS superstar and something to do with hotels... Here is the helldump on the guy http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3106702 I think it has links to his original posts.
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Apr 20, 2016 00:48
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quote:I once stalked my boyfriends ex on social media for like 7 months and I was feeding info back to him like “omg she had a baby” and one day I showed him a photo of her with the baby and he was like erm babe that’s not my ex… It turned out I had been stalking some random girl with the same name as his ex, but I had become so invested in this girls life that I had to reach out to her and tell her this bizarre story about how I’d been accidentally stalking her for 7 months and she thought it was hilarious and anyways that’s the story of how I met my best friend.
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Apr 20, 2016 01:06
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WampaLord posted:I want to murder this person. Same. The problem with some of these TVT dumps is that they're often not stories, but rather sadly believable things that the writers think are cool, but in reality are insufferable.
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Apr 20, 2016 03:48
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http://imgur.com/gallery/4ghAxNS When I make a romantic dinner for two, I also plate the forks the same way and put glasses on the same side.
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Apr 20, 2016 16:32
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kimbo305 posted:http://imgur.com/gallery/4ghAxNS That picture is so grim
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Apr 20, 2016 16:39
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kimbo305 posted:http://imgur.com/gallery/4ghAxNS "i didn't notice it haha" EmmyOk posted:That picture is so grim
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Apr 20, 2016 16:44
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kimbo305 posted:http://imgur.com/gallery/4ghAxNS This looks like the last meal for someone who's about to be tortured to death
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Apr 20, 2016 16:57
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kimbo305 posted:http://imgur.com/gallery/4ghAxNS Only the finest grated Parmesan cheese for you, my dear. Would you like some black pepper as well? *rips open McDonalds pepper packet*
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Apr 20, 2016 17:11
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Khazar-khum posted:Letters Fun times quote:This troper once read a thread on a forum where someone posted a lame rear end story totally missing the point of the thread. He looked the previous posts of the person up and saw that he made the OP. Now this troper is confused.
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Apr 20, 2016 19:11
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kimbo305 posted:http://imgur.com/gallery/4ghAxNS "Imgur Community, I need your help" has to be the most depressing thing I've read in ages
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Apr 20, 2016 20:20
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Wylie posted:"Imgur Community, I need your help" has to be the most depressing thing I've read in ages Then you should look up some "TCC I need your help being a responsible opiate/pill/cocaine/etc user".
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Apr 20, 2016 20:28
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If I came home to that I'd assume the other person hated me. Like how bad is it that those people who post pictures of a romantic meal with their body pillows have better lighting, food, and less creepy vibes than this.
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Apr 20, 2016 20:51
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GOTTA STAY FAI posted:Did he really hang a brassiere in the doorway to lend legitimacy to his claim that a girl had been in the room? Isn't that bra also really big? Like, in a "fat person" way rather just having a big chest.
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Apr 20, 2016 21:45
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Ytlaya posted:Isn't that bra also really big? Like, in a "fat person" way rather just having a big chest. It could be, I am bad at perspective and poo poo, but to me it mostly looks old and worn. Source: I have seen (and worn) many an old lovely bra.
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Apr 20, 2016 22:24
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He edited into his post a link to proof that he had a gf, but then removed it.
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Apr 20, 2016 22:29
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What do people who think a mediocre spaghetti dinner is romantic and fancy eat on the regular? This is a serious question. I'm not a great chef and it's not like I plate my meals, but what do you usually eat that makes that special?
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Apr 20, 2016 22:35
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cash crab posted:This looks like the last meal for someone who's about to be tortured to death ...by the food itself!
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Apr 20, 2016 22:35
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