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JiveHonky
May 12, 2001

by zen death robot
Grimey Drawer
just as i realize i left my tp in the car i crap my pants. nobody has noticed yet so i sneak back down by the water, my plan is to quickly remove my pants, rinse them out, put them back on and tell everyone i "fell in"

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ziasquinn
Jan 1, 2006

Fallen Rib
What do you mean no one brought their own water or filters? It's going to take all God drat night to filter water for all these dicks with this tiny filter

Sorryformybadjokes
Apr 21, 2004

I identify as a simian who pronounces the 'silent' letters in words.
Fallen Rib
get into a fist fight with your dad and end up crying yourself to sleep gently caress YOU DAD

FoolyCharged
Oct 11, 2012

Cheating at a raffle? I sentence you to 1 year in jail! No! Two years! Three! Four! Five years! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!
Somebody call for an ant?

Hey guys check out what I can do with his aerosol can and a lighter!

*scorches neighbors tent*

JiveHonky
May 12, 2001

by zen death robot
Grimey Drawer
"anybody seen a pair of glasses?" everyone ignores me

im not even drunk. this is the worst

symbolic
Nov 2, 2014

i knocked over a bird's nest while trying to hang myself. what should we do with the eggs?

FoolyCharged
Oct 11, 2012

Cheating at a raffle? I sentence you to 1 year in jail! No! Two years! Three! Four! Five years! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!
Somebody call for an ant?

JiveHonky posted:

"anybody seen a pair of glasses?" everyone ignores me

im not even drunk. this is the worst

*crunch*
Hey has anyone lost a pair of glasses? Looks like someone stepped on em.

criscodisco
Feb 18, 2004

do it
I'm gonna get drunk and decide I can keep raccoons out of our food by peeing a perimeter line around the campsite. Prolly gonna feel your wiener while you sleep, too.

abigserve
Sep 13, 2009

this is a better avatar than what I had before
I brought a fry pan, gas cooker and bacon. I am now realising I have no method to clean any of my cooking equipment.

JiveHonky
May 12, 2001

by zen death robot
Grimey Drawer
my joke is to go around to the different groups of goons and say loudly "GROUND FLOOR OF AN EPIC CAMPING TRIP LOL"

i'm not even drunk. what was i thinking?

Masturbasturd
Sep 1, 2014
*is naked ALL the time*

SEX BURRITO
Jun 30, 2007

Not much fun
Hey guys I brought my guitar. Let's sit round the fire and sing!

*doesn't know how to tune guitar*
*plays wonderwall intro very slowly and keeps loving it up*

Lupin
Feb 21, 2007

JiveHonky posted:

just as i realize i left my tp in the car i crap my pants. nobody has noticed yet so i sneak back down by the water, my plan is to quickly remove my pants, rinse them out, put them back on and tell everyone i "fell in"

This oddly specific story has the ring of truth

JiveHonky
May 12, 2001

by zen death robot
Grimey Drawer
crawls into tent to sleep when its barely dark out and keeps poking head out to ask everyone to "please keep it down"

A Typical Goon
Feb 25, 2011
Food? I'll be alright, I brought a KFC family fun bucket and 2 bags of chips

Skeleton Ape
Dec 21, 2008



Hey so I got this bear spray stuff. I put it all over you tents, better safe than sorry

Skeleton Ape
Dec 21, 2008



:byobear::byobear::byobear::byobear::byobear::byobear::byobear::byobear::byobear::byobear::byobear::byobear::byobear::byobear::byobear::byobear::byobear::byobear:

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 10 years!
*takes viagra, bashes out wicked 4 hour bongo set hands free*

EorayMel
May 30, 2015

WE GET IT. YOU LOVE GUN JESUS. Toujours des fusils Bullpup Français.
*Spends the most time away from the group in the middle of nowhere*

*Tries to plot "accidental" death of that one friend I don't like that much*

*Spends 3 minutes trying to sharpen a stick into a primitive weapon to hunt squirrels/hand drill a fire, gives up soon after I break it into too many small useless pieces*

*Takes a poo poo and wipes rear end with poison ivy*

*Makes up plausible excuse when I return and mask my itchy anus*

*Tries to sneak in sumo stomps around the fire to relieve itchy anus; burns when I fart*

*Drinks all the booze out of depression, begins having war flash backs, suddenly camping trip turns into a Jason Bourne movie or I go full crackpot conspiracy theorist until I trip and bash my head against rocks and bleed out in agony*

100 HOGS AGREE
Oct 13, 2007
Grimey Drawer
im the guy that forgets to put
on sunscreen and falls asleep on a raft in the lake. beet red on the front, pasty white on the back.

By popular demand
Jul 17, 2007

IT *BZZT* WASP ME--
IT WASP ME ALL *BZZT* ALONG!


*wakes up, throws up, falls asleep*

ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD
Jan 21, 2007

i guess im going camping

yee haw holy poo poo

shoophobo
Aug 30, 2013

"shoophobo? more like shittyposter!" :grin:

Fallen Rib
Hey guys, I found some mushrooms on a log.
*spends the next 3 days tripping, cowering in the woods nude*

Wifi Toilet
Oct 1, 2004

Toilet Rascal
*buys $500 tent, sleeps in car instead*

Dave_Indeed
Feb 22, 2004

by FactsAreUseless
*Cooks something in a cast iron pan, fucks it up*
*Pisses fire out of my poo poo butt all rear end bitch night while violently barfing all over my dick, sometimes barfing because I have started making GBS threads... sometimes, making GBS threads because I have started bafing*

Every time I go camping.

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 10 years!
*takes a poo poo on an antihill* "hey guys come check this out" :smuggo:

Boner Zone
Jan 14, 2006

by Nyc_Tattoo
i brought the guns

Boner Zone
Jan 14, 2006

by Nyc_Tattoo
they're only for me though

flerp
Feb 25, 2014
im camping

ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD
Jan 21, 2007

flerp posted:

im camping

me too, weird

JiveHonky
May 12, 2001

by zen death robot
Grimey Drawer

flerp posted:

im camping

canyoneer
Sep 13, 2005


I only have canyoneyes for you
*picks up rocket launcher*
*crouches around blind corridor near rocket launcher spawn*

By popular demand
Jul 17, 2007

IT *BZZT* WASP ME--
IT WASP ME ALL *BZZT* ALONG!


canyoneer posted:

*picks up rocket launcher*
*crouches around blind corridor near rocket launcher spawn*

*trips over the computer wire, disconnecting it mid-game*

numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014

How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

who brought the lube and blunts??

JiveHonky
May 12, 2001

by zen death robot
Grimey Drawer
Lubes up blunt. Inserts into rear end.

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 10 years!

numberoneposter posted:

who brought the lube and blunts??

W-what are we doing with the blunts?

grieving for Gandalf
Apr 22, 2008

*starts jacking off in front of the campfire*

well??? what're y'all waiting for

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 10 years!
*builds primitive hut out of sticks, forgets to include door* :gbsmith:

Sophy Wackles
Dec 17, 2000

> access main security grid
access: PERMISSION DENIED.





Anyone want to zip sleeping bags with me and form a super sleeping bag??

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Jellidelic
Nov 28, 2011

I brought a portable stove and breakfast stuff! Pancakes, sausages, name it!
*assumes i've already made my contribution and somebody else will do the cooking, stove goes unused all weekend*

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