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VectorSigma
Jan 20, 2004

Transform
and
Freak Out



"Hurr durr, what if it were the fashion for every country were ruled by laws you had to mind and obey all the time? You've been working hard at your job all week, so of course the first thing you want to do on your day off is obey some laws made by some dudes in some building somewhere. DUrrrrr *shits pants*" -The jackass who invented laws.

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symbolic
Nov 2, 2014

did you get arrested for pot, OP

JiveHonky
May 12, 2001

by zen death robot
Grimey Drawer
shhhhhhh. everythings gonna be okay baby

A ILL BREAKFAST
Jun 9, 2007

*unsheathes katana*
yeah man, totally. and what is the DEAL with airline food? am i right?

glowstick party tonight
Oct 4, 2003

by zen death robot
heh, books :smug:

VectorSigma
Jan 20, 2004

Transform
and
Freak Out



A ILL BREAKFAST posted:

yeah man, totally. and what is the DEAL with airline food? am i right?

I have never eaten a meal on a flight, so I can't really say. I'm not sure what this has to do with the topic.

SHISHKABOB
Nov 30, 2012

Fun Shoe
Actually I'm ok with laws.

Deus Ex Macklemore
Jul 2, 2004


Zelensky's Zealots
I've seen a bunch of episodes of Law and Order so i can represent you in a court of law.

BONG BONG

Pththya-lyi
Nov 8, 2009

THUNDERDOME LOSER 2020
I'm very grateful that laws exist, because I would have almost certainly been raped and murdered long ago without them

Trojan.exe
Feb 22, 2011

I never said I was a role model
I would like it if laws dictated fashion, especially if fedoras and neckbeards were outlawed.

Deus Ex Macklemore
Jul 2, 2004


Zelensky's Zealots

Pththya-lyi posted:

I'm very grateful that laws exist, because I would have almost certainly been raped and murdered long ago without them

Don't give up hope, there's always tomorrow!

That's what Law and Order SVU taught me.

SHISHKABOB
Nov 30, 2012

Fun Shoe

Pththya-lyi posted:

I'm very grateful that laws exist, because I would have almost certainly been raped and murdered long ago without them

Actually laws don't do that, guns and power do that.

Iron Prince
Aug 28, 2005
Buglord
laws are the only thing protecting your mouth from my balls, op

VectorSigma
Jan 20, 2004

Transform
and
Freak Out



Iron Prince posted:

laws are the only thing protecting your mouth from my balls, op

maybe they're the only thing protecting your balls from my mouth

VendaGoat
Nov 1, 2005

VectorSigma posted:

maybe they're the only thing protecting your balls from my mouth

OH, SNAP!

Isaac
Aug 3, 2006

Fun Shoe
The white zone is for loading and unloading only

Iron Prince
Aug 28, 2005
Buglord

VectorSigma posted:

maybe they're the only thing protecting your balls from my mouth

look i'm willing to 69 and just call it even. truth in the middle and all that

Isaac
Aug 3, 2006

Fun Shoe
I piss on hamurabis grave

frogge
Apr 7, 2006


fun fact society invented laws because without them we'd be living in utter savagery.

Isaac
Aug 3, 2006

Fun Shoe
SlanderEx. Law #127: "If any one "point the finger" at a sister of a god or the wife of any one, and can not prove it, this man shall be taken before the judges and his brow shall be marked. (by cutting the skin, or perhaps hair.)"[23]TradeEx. Law #265: "If a herdsman, to whose care cattle or sheep have been entrusted, be guilty of fraud and make false returns of the natural increase, or sell them for money, then shall he be convicted and pay the owner ten times the loss."[23]SlaveryEx. Law #15: "If any one take a male or female slave of the court, or a male or female slave of a freed man, outside the city gates, he shall be put to death."[23]The duties of workersEx. Law #42: "If any one take over a field to till it, and obtain no harvest therefrom, it must be proved that he did no work on the field, and he must deliver grain, just as his neighbor raised, to the owner of the field."[23]TheftEx. Law #22: "If any one is committing a robbery and is caught, then he shall be put to death."[23]TradeEx. Law #104: "If a merchant give an agent corn, wool, oil, or any other goods to transport, the agent shall give a receipt for the amount, and compensate the merchant therefor. Then he shall obtain a receipt from the merchant for the money that he gives the merchant."[23]LiabilityEx. Law #53: "If any one be too lazy to keep his dam in proper condition, and does not so keep it; if then the dam break and all the fields be flooded, then shall he in whose dam the break occurred be sold for money, and the money shall replace the corn which he has caused to be ruined."[23]DivorceEx. Law #142: "If a woman quarrel with her husband, and say: "You are not congenial to me," the reasons for her prejudice must be presented. If she is guiltless, and there is no fault on her part, but he leaves and neglects her, then no guilt attaches to this woman, she shall take her dowry and go back to her father's house."[23]

One of the best known laws from Hammurabi's code was:

Ex. Law #196: "If a man destroy the eye of another man, they shall destroy his eye. If one break a man's bone, they shall break his bone. If one destroy the eye of a freeman or break the bone of a freeman he shall pay one gold mina. If one destroy the eye of a man's slave or break a bone of a man's slave he shall pay one-half his price."[23]

VectorSigma
Jan 20, 2004

Transform
and
Freak Out



Isaac posted:

SlanderEx. Law #127: "If any one "point the finger" at a sister of a god or the wife of any one, and can not prove it, this man shall be taken before the judges and his brow shall be marked. (by cutting the skin, or perhaps hair.)"[23]TradeEx. Law #265: "If a herdsman, to whose care cattle or sheep have been entrusted, be guilty of fraud and make false returns of the natural increase, or sell them for money, then shall he be convicted and pay the owner ten times the loss."[23]SlaveryEx. Law #15: "If any one take a male or female slave of the court, or a male or female slave of a freed man, outside the city gates, he shall be put to death."[23]The duties of workersEx. Law #42: "If any one take over a field to till it, and obtain no harvest therefrom, it must be proved that he did no work on the field, and he must deliver grain, just as his neighbor raised, to the owner of the field."[23]TheftEx. Law #22: "If any one is committing a robbery and is caught, then he shall be put to death."[23]TradeEx. Law #104: "If a merchant give an agent corn, wool, oil, or any other goods to transport, the agent shall give a receipt for the amount, and compensate the merchant therefor. Then he shall obtain a receipt from the merchant for the money that he gives the merchant."[23]LiabilityEx. Law #53: "If any one be too lazy to keep his dam in proper condition, and does not so keep it; if then the dam break and all the fields be flooded, then shall he in whose dam the break occurred be sold for money, and the money shall replace the corn which he has caused to be ruined."[23]DivorceEx. Law #142: "If a woman quarrel with her husband, and say: "You are not congenial to me," the reasons for her prejudice must be presented. If she is guiltless, and there is no fault on her part, but he leaves and neglects her, then no guilt attaches to this woman, she shall take her dowry and go back to her father's house."[23]

One of the best known laws from Hammurabi's code was:

Ex. Law #196: "If a man destroy the eye of another man, they shall destroy his eye. If one break a man's bone, they shall break his bone. If one destroy the eye of a freeman or break the bone of a freeman he shall pay one gold mina. If one destroy the eye of a man's slave or break a bone of a man's slave he shall pay one-half his price."[23]

looks like a lot of bullshit to me

satanic splash-back
Jan 28, 2009

"Going Ham on somebody" is an idiom that refers to the ancient practice of an eye for an eye, or in other words, beating the poo poo out of somebody after they have beat poo poo out of you.

RaySmuckles
Oct 14, 2009


:vapes:
Grimey Drawer
hammurabi thinks you're a lil bitch, op

coolskull
Nov 11, 2007

let he who has not been a public safety hazard cast the first stone

Blurry Gray Thing
Jun 3, 2009
If a man bites off the balls of another man, they shall bite off his balls.

VectorSigma
Jan 20, 2004

Transform
and
Freak Out



Blurry Gray Thing posted:

If a man bites off the balls of another man, they shall bite off his balls.

this would make a good comedy bit

what if you don't want to bite some dude's balls, even if he bit yo[urs? that would be awkward

edit: or what if someone without balls bit yours?

VectorSigma fucked around with this message at 06:35 on Apr 28, 2016

eSports Chaebol
Feb 22, 2005

Yeah, actually, gamers in the house forever,
I enjoy the Culture series by Iain M. Banks as well, OP; however, even if such a utopia is the future, laws are going to be with us for a long time to come.

drunk dog
Apr 6, 2014

Resident Millennial
the worst kind of call-out thread

spud
Aug 27, 2003

by LITERALLY AN ADMIN
I can't wear those skinny jean things because they literally crush my balls.

drunk dog
Apr 6, 2014

Resident Millennial

eSports Chaebol posted:

I enjoy the Culture series by Iain M. Banks as well, OP; however, even if such a utopia is the future, laws are going to be with us for a long time to come.

If the human civ ended up remotely similar to the culture I would be mildly impressed but still suicidal hth, but not

drunk dog
Apr 6, 2014

Resident Millennial

spud posted:

I can't wear those skinny jean things because they literally crush my balls.

The worst kind of millennial

symbolic
Nov 2, 2014

spud posted:

I can't wear those skinny jean things because they literally crush my balls.
lose weight, nerd

VectorSigma
Jan 20, 2004

Transform
and
Freak Out



i can't wear those skinny jean things because they're loving retarded

Kuato
Feb 25, 2005

"I CAN'T BELIEVE I ATE THE WHOLE THING"
Buglord

Pththya-lyi posted:

I'm very grateful that laws exist, because I would have almost certainly been raped and murdered long ago without them

Well since you wrote that your chances of being raped and/or murdered multiplied exponentially. Shouldn't write or say that kind of stuff out loud IMO, just jinxed yourself dude.

drunk dog
Apr 6, 2014

Resident Millennial
stop being ironic it's hurting my brainstem

VectorSigma
Jan 20, 2004

Transform
and
Freak Out



drunk dog posted:

the worst kind of call-out thread

this is not one of those

drunk dog posted:

The worst kind of millennial

this, however

drunk dog
Apr 6, 2014

Resident Millennial

VectorSigma posted:

this is not one of those

Ok I got quoted I can go to sleep now.

raton
Jul 28, 2003

by FactsAreUseless
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DK8TSJuBMgM

raton
Jul 28, 2003

by FactsAreUseless
Hello I love the law and I love peeing on my own legs

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drunk dog
Apr 6, 2014

Resident Millennial

Sheep-Goats posted:

Hello I love the law and I love peeing on my own legs

See, this is why america is hosed

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