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Dave_Indeed
Feb 22, 2004

by FactsAreUseless
* Walks down pre check line, but doesn't have pre check like a loving idiot *
* Talks to the TSA agent because they have all the time in the world *
* Listens to literally 0 instructions *
* Holds up the line because they brought giant costco sized containers of various condiments like you're not supposed to do *
* Stands in front of the xray machine getting dressed instead of taking your poo poo and g'ing tfo *

Condiment thing is a true story. I witnessed some old lady get busted for condiments and then become very upset when they threw it away.

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satanic splash-back
Jan 28, 2009

ITT ITT ITT ITT ITT

FedEx Mercury
Jan 7, 2004

Me bad posting? That's unpossible!
Lipstick Apathy
Elder prejudice must be eliminated before I become old.

flakeloaf
Feb 26, 2003

Still better than android clock

I'll have you know I'm far too important to stand here behind you, you're making me late for sitting over there.

a new study bible!
Feb 2, 2009



BIG DICK NICK
A Philadelphia Legend
Fly Eagles Fly


Old people are great bc you can just slip you drugs in they pockets as they walk through the scanners and collect them on the other side.

Skeleton Ape
Dec 21, 2008



Airport security is ok, it's kind of funny to see shocked old honkies getting hassled by law enforcement for the first time in their lives.

Dr. Dogballs Jr.
Jun 9, 2014

the angriest sex machine
my dad just flew for the first time in a while and hes getting to that curmudgeony old age and every time i told him hed have to take something off the response was a disbelieving "what??"

"this line... i remember back when this was way different."
"dad you gotta take off your jacket"
"what??"
"dad you gotta take your wallet out of your pocket"
"what!? my wallet!?!?
"dad you cant wear your hat through there"
"what????"
"dad you gotta take off your shoes-"
"my shoes!?!?!?"
"your belt has a metal buckle dad"
"WHAT!?!?!?"

he forgot to take off his belt :cripes:

Son of Rodney
Feb 22, 2006

ohmygodohmygodohmygod

lmao of at americans being so used to being treated like poo poo by TSA, that they start making fun of people who remember a time when you were still treated with respect

lmfao "look at that old guy, thinks he should be treated like a person. What an idiot"

Son of Rodney
Feb 22, 2006

ohmygodohmygodohmygod

hahahaha "who does he think he is, somebody who is allowed to have a normal sized bottle of water?"

*smugly sips his 3 oz coca cola "fun size" that he bought for 5$, bends over for the cavity search*

City of Tampa
May 6, 2007

by zen death robot
what airport are you flying from where the TSA people aren't extremely aggressively rude black ladies?

like lol yeah sure they are speaking politely with old people and letting them hold up the line

Mozi
Apr 4, 2004

Forms change so fast
Time is moving past
Memory is smoke
Gonna get wider when I die
Nap Ghost
oh... my toothpaste? but it was given to me by my granddaughter... well, ok, you can take it but i expect you to give it back when i come back from my trip

Skeleton Ape
Dec 21, 2008



I used to fly pretty regularly between Montana and O'Hare. The difference in TSA civility was... pronounced.

A Concrete Divider
Jan 20, 2012

The Unbearable Whiteness of Eating
*squats, shits in hand*
*eats own poo poo*

ANIME IS BLOOD
Sep 4, 2008

by zen death robot

Son of Rodney posted:

lmao of at americans being so used to being treated like poo poo by TSA, that they start making fun of people who remember a time when you were still treated with respect

lmfao "look at that old guy, thinks he should be treated like a person. What an idiot"

this is the slyest, best name/av/post combo I've seen in a long-rear end time :golfclap:

Zeluth
May 12, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
!

Only registered members can see post attachments!

i am harry
Oct 14, 2003

*pays for groceries at 6:30am with a check while I'm 3 people behind trying to buy a drink before the bus passes me by*

FlimFlam Imam
Mar 1, 2007

Standing on a hill in my mountain of dreams
"Is this the line for pudin'? It's 11 am, time for puddin'."

"I killed fiddy men"

A Concrete Divider
Jan 20, 2012

The Unbearable Whiteness of Eating
*is senile*
*getting ready to fly on a plane*

MikeyLikesIt
Sep 25, 2012
*disgruntled old man*
*turns to young whippersnapper behind me and goes "arent you mad 50% of americans dont speak english anymore?"*

Shaquin
May 12, 2007
the tsa is like cartoon characters its like a bunch of ethnic stereotypes a lot of them fat as hell and many many officer farvas were cloned from rear end growths somewhere and put in charge of national security

Nigmaetcetera
Nov 17, 2004

borkborkborkmorkmorkmork-gabbalooins
"I ain't got no fuckin bomb. Do I look like a loving a-rab to you?"

Owlbear Camus
Jan 3, 2013

Maybe this guy that flies is just sort of passing through, you know?


*shouts 'allahu ackbar' and pulls out his ak, emptying the magazine into the terrified crowd before detonating his suicide vest*


my "itt" guy was an elderly terror man

gimme the GOD DAMN candy
Jul 1, 2007

Otisburg posted:

*shouts 'allahu ackbar' and pulls out his ak, emptying the magazine into the terrified crowd before detonating his suicide vest*


my "itt" guy was an elderly terror man

harsh, but fair. death to america.

GORDON
Jan 1, 2006

by Fluffdaddy

Nigmaetcetera posted:

"I ain't got no fuckin bomb. Do I look like a loving a-rab to you?"

well he has a point

A Concrete Divider
Jan 20, 2012

The Unbearable Whiteness of Eating
*is headed to florida*

Grand Prize Winner
Feb 19, 2007


City of Tampa posted:

what airport are you flying from where the TSA people aren't extremely aggressively rude black ladies?

like lol yeah sure they are speaking politely with old people and letting them hold up the line

I once went through a PNW airport with a boxcutter I'd forgotten about in my carryon. Found it again a week later. LAX, meanwhile, made me throw away a metal spoon.

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 10 years!
*is excited to be fondled by a heavy black woman, it has been years since the winky has seen action. Doesn't get boner, goes into bathroom and repeatedly punches self in dick.*

Wendigee
Jul 19, 2004

Lol my dad has two artifical knees.

Airport security is great when you set off every metal detector. Good thing he's white and like 70.

a new study bible!
Feb 2, 2009



BIG DICK NICK
A Philadelphia Legend
Fly Eagles Fly


I have a concealed carry permit that allows me to bring my gun on the plane.

No. 6
Jun 30, 2002

MikeyLikesIt posted:

*disgruntled old man*
*turns to young whippersnapper behind me and goes "arent you mad 50% of americans dont speak english anymore?"*

*Responds in Swedish*

FlimFlam Imam
Mar 1, 2007

Standing on a hill in my mountain of dreams
Let me tell you about my no good god drat kids!

they don't want to hear about it, dad.

Roargasm
Oct 21, 2010

Hate to sound sleazy
But tease me
I don't want it if it's that easy
*takes your laptop from the xray bin and completely fucks you over*

Blue Train
Jun 17, 2012

Dr. Dogballs Jr. posted:

my dad just flew for the first time in a while and hes getting to that curmudgeony old age and every time i told him hed have to take something off the response was a disbelieving "what??"

"this line... i remember back when this was way different."
"dad you gotta take off your jacket"
"what??"
"dad you gotta take your wallet out of your pocket"
"what!? my wallet!?!?
"dad you cant wear your hat through there"
"what????"
"dad you gotta take off your shoes-"
"my shoes!?!?!?"
"your belt has a metal buckle dad"
"WHAT!?!?!?"

he forgot to take off his belt :cripes:

he's right and this is all bullshit

Booblord Zagats
Oct 30, 2011


Pork Pro
*gets made to take off shoes*

*Complains to overweight Latina about being treated like cattle*

*Gets frisked by a black person*

At the end of the line, gets cane off motorized belt and begins assaulting the fat Native lady who is nearest to him*

*Race war begins in earnest*

*Baltimore, Detroit, St Louis, Africa, Central America and the Mideast burn with the power of split atoms*

*The stars realign to spell out "TRUMP 2016"*

*Mel Gibson gets his first boner in 25 years that didn't involve pictures of the holocaust*

a new study bible!
Feb 2, 2009



BIG DICK NICK
A Philadelphia Legend
Fly Eagles Fly


*doesn't have the common sense to wear slip on shoes*

phasmid
Jan 16, 2015

Booty Shaker
SILENT MAJORITY
I would just be shouting "What??" because I left my hearing aid at home. I'm the borderline crazy looking old person with a rainbow ballcap, unzipped red track suit and a shirt that says "God don't make no trash".

Blue Train
Jun 17, 2012

CANNIBAL GIRLS posted:

*doesn't have the common sense to wear slip on shoes*

eh velcro is good enough

Sponge Baathist
Jan 30, 2010

by FactsAreUseless
*ran out of courtesy to change diapers before the cavity search*

a new study bible!
Feb 2, 2009



BIG DICK NICK
A Philadelphia Legend
Fly Eagles Fly


Airlines won't even let you sit next to the person you buy tickets with unless you give them an extra 200 dollars each.

Death to airlines.

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GORDON
Jan 1, 2006

by Fluffdaddy

CANNIBAL GIRLS posted:

Airlines won't even let you sit next to the person you buy tickets with unless you give them an extra 200 dollars each.

Death to airlines.

Death to everyone still buying tickets and accepting it.

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