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The world is full of problems. Seemingly insurmountable problems. War. Poverty. Inequality. Hate and injustice. So many issues that I don’t know how to solve. I am not a wise man, and I don’t have any answers, but I do have one thing: my dick. I will mash my flaccid dick at the world’s problems until they go away. Climate change. We’re cutting our own throats by blasting the atmosphere with CO2. How do we get the industrialized nations of the world to undertake a massive and unprecedented shift away from fossil fuels? I don’t know. I will thoughtfully and dispassionately mash my limp cock at climate change until we see some results. Social and economic inequality. Systemic racism and discrimination. Crime and poverty and education. A tangle of social issues so complex that we can’t even agree on the root causes. I’m going to grind my hairy noodle in social inequality’s face until it fucks off. I’ll grab my limp wang with one hand and poke at it with my circumcised mushroom head until racism is dead. Misogyny. The Patriarchy. Reproductive rights. Domestic abuse. These are major issues. I’ll slap them across the brow with my un-erect johnson. I’ll bury their face in my limp dick pube forest and hold them there until equality is no longer just a dream. Please note I am not going to put my cock on any actual, physical person. That would be sexual assault. I am going to teabag the concept of sexual assault until it is just a memory. I will carefully stuff my balls in its mouth and sit there until we all feel safe. We have to start somewhere. We have to make use of the resources we have. I have two strong hands and a floppy dick.
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# ? May 2, 2016 23:10 |
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# ? Mar 19, 2024 13:11 |
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Interesting thread dude
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# ? May 2, 2016 23:21 |
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This sounds better than donating to charity. You have my flaccid dick right behind you, ready to mash it wherever it's needed.
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# ? May 2, 2016 23:25 |
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That's all well and good, but what are we supposed to do when you chub it up?
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# ? May 2, 2016 23:25 |
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tried this one time OP, didnt work out. i'd tell you about it but its a schlong story.
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# ? May 2, 2016 23:26 |
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I don't get it, it doesn't seem like your limp penis could have an effect on any of these issues. in fact, many of these are purely conceptual and thus could not be interacted with physically. Very confounding, please elaborate OP.
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# ? May 2, 2016 23:30 |
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(Mashes flaccid dick at OP.)
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# ? May 2, 2016 23:31 |
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if the worlds problems could be solved with a limp dick i'd vote for Trump.
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# ? May 2, 2016 23:36 |
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Mozi posted:That's all well and good, but what are we supposed to do when you chub it up? I learned long ago that a calm, rational approach to problem-solving is best. Being passionate about a cause is good, but becoming over-excited or agitated in the moment can be counter-productive. If I become erect I will sit in the corner and stare at the wall until I am ready to continue mashing. Cantaloupe posted:I don't get it, it doesn't seem like your limp penis could have an effect on any of these issues. in fact, many of these are purely conceptual and thus could not be interacted with physically. Very confounding, please elaborate OP. You make a good point. Physically interacting with concepts is difficult, if not impossible. I'm going to spread my dick and balls apart and smash the base of my soft phallus at this problem and get back to you.
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# ? May 2, 2016 23:38 |
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# ? Mar 19, 2024 13:11 |
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*begins crying*
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# ? May 2, 2016 23:42 |