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Many goons have taken umbrage that I dare call Des Moines anything other than "Bad" and consistently raise up Chicago as an example of what a good Midwestern city should look like. So I took the plunge and went over to Chicago to go see what all this hubbub is about. Chicago is the U.S.'s 3rd largest city by population and certainly shows it. Everything is huge, busy, and tightly compacted. The city has definitely taken a lot of pains to make their touristy areas look good. I was able to drive right down by Willis Tower and even dropped the wife off at a McDonalds on the corner of the block. Strangely this McDonalds was closed...no hours, no nothing, just here is a McDonalds that is closed at 11 AM on a weekend for some reason  No lunch there, but it was cool to look up through the sunroof and see some of the tallest buildings in the country.Whatever, that was weird. Anyways, we checked out the fun sites like Chicago 360 on top of John Hancock and walked along the Navy Pier. It was cool to be able to walk downtown in a major metropolitan city and have it feel modern and clean and safe. Well, safe unless you count the drivers actively trying to murder you. Oh and parking, just lol if you want to park. $28 to park for just a few hours in downtown Chicago, and if you want to take public transit, its available...if you have 3 hours to go 3 miles. Its just not really a realistic option for getting around town in a timely fashion. One thing I did note is that segregation is real in that city. On North Ave you go from West to East and it goes from Suburban sprawling malls to industrial buildings to hair braiding shops, to Policy Camera 1984 style, to liquor stores, to taco shops to a few municipal buildings and POOF you're in oxygen bars, chiropractors, and $11 craft beer places and no more boarded up windows or doors. Its like the entirety of the American segregation all on one road. Almost a tourist attraction in itself if it wasn't so goddam sad. The people were mostly nice and personable in person. They were willing to talk to you, help you out, or at least not be curmudgeons. Drivers though....its clear Chicago has put a lot of effort into making their city accessible from the outside. And it'd work if it weren't' for the actual Chicago drivers. They treat parking lanes as actual driving lanes, only to be bounced out of for those pesky, ya know, PARKED cars. Any opening larger than 6 inches is obviously a car length designed to be taken up and occupied by them at all times. Lane changes are a requirement, even if there are no cars around you. You have to change lanes or else your car breaks down I guess? Need to stop at a shop or curious if a place is open? Just stop and look in the shop to see whats up, everyone else around you will just stop in a 45 MPH zone, nbd. And lol if you try to cross the street. Even if you have a green to walk and they a red to stop, they NEED to get up there to be ready for if it turns green for them, blocking foot traffic and ensuring a difficult time for everyone. OK here is the run down: Pros: Big. Lots to do with tons of fun attractions to enjoy Well developed. You can get anything you want or need there. State of the art facilities for science, art, economy, architecture, and food Lots of fine booty and thick (and not so thick) girls They care about their green spaces Cons: Parking is bullshit. I get paying for space, but thats criminal level gouging going on there. Driving is hell. It doesn't have to be, but the inconsiderate Chicagoan makes sure it is. Segregated as gently caress. Tons of crime and run down falling apart bullshit. You could tell how good "Building a New Chicago!" was going in each area by how badly the signs were vandalized. Everything is just too expensive and it doesn't need to be except its ~Chicago~. No, a beer doesn't need to cost $9, it probably doesn't even cost that much at a Cubs game, wtf. Its just too busy everywhere. Even in the suburbs. Just calm the gently caress down. BONUS: Chicago Dog + Chicago Style Pizza Vs IOWA CHOP: Chicago dog is good, but its not as great as they make it out to be. The extra condiments are nice, but its not very filling nor special. A nice dog to grab on the go, but nothing to be excited about. The pizza no thanks. NY style has you beat in all areas: presentation, ease of eating, taste, and price. BONUS VERDICT: IOWA CHOP is still the better dish. FINAL VERDICT: Chicago earns a B-. Holding it back are its rude people, crushing poverty, pervasive violence, and unevenly crumbling/being built up infrastructure. Lower your prices a bit to be a bit more approachable instead of creating more poor and gentrification (lol Trump Tower), and keep on building that beautiful river skyline and you can work your way up to a solid B+. You'll have to fix your loving driving to get anywhere near an A though. Des Moines wins, but Chicago makes a strong showing for 3rd Best in the Midwest!
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May 24, 2016 00:29
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| # ? Apr 23, 2024 13:27 |
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the women are fat as hell im sure it was fine for you
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May 24, 2016 00:30
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a frito chili pie and a seven rolled woman and Jastiger is in heaven
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May 24, 2016 00:31
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Do they have Maid-Rite?
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May 24, 2016 00:34
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Shaquin posted:a frito chili pie and a seven rolled woman and Jastiger is in heaven Lol Chicago is Texas for northerners.
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May 24, 2016 00:34
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Did you see many fat women that struck your fancy
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May 24, 2016 00:34
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Washington DC is better than Des Moines, and that should sting
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May 24, 2016 00:36
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segregated as gently caress says notable des moines fat chasing maniac Jastiger who calls the whitest city on earth his home
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May 24, 2016 00:36
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Shaquin posted:segregated as gently caress says notable des moines fat chasing maniac Jastiger who calls the whitest city on earth his home P sure that's either Portland or slc
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May 24, 2016 00:38
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I almost went to Chicago once, but then I didn't.
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May 24, 2016 00:39
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Hector Beerlioz posted:Washington DC is better than Des Moines, and that should sting The last time I was in dc, I saw a homeless guy sleeping under a bush. He had an unobstructed view of the Washington monument AND the white house dome
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May 24, 2016 00:40
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Jastiger posted:Strangely this McDonalds was closed...no hours, no nothing, just here is a McDonalds that is closed at 11 AM on a weekend for some reason If you mean the one on Upper Wacker, if it was Sunday they were just closed. If it was Saturday it was probably a crime scene.
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May 24, 2016 00:40
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ChrisHansen posted:The last time I was in dc, I saw a homeless guy sleeping under a bush. He had an unobstructed view of the Washington monument AND the white house dome thank you for respecting our veterans
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May 24, 2016 00:41
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thanks obama
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May 24, 2016 01:26
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des moines has no good points and few bad points, mostly involving the bland, white and fat population. chicago goes to insane extremes in both directions. i dunno, i guess there is an argument to be made that the former is better than the latter. more people probably enjoy eating a raw potato than a poo poo sandwich on gourmet bread, after all.
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May 24, 2016 01:28
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ChrisHansen posted:The last time I was in dc, I saw a homeless guy sleeping under a bush. He had an unobstructed view of the Washington monument AND the white house dome sounds like a good spot
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May 24, 2016 01:28
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hmm let me put on my reading glasses for this 19 paragraph jastiger post lol. uh, yeah, no. i dont think so sparky. shut the gently caress up sparky. aaaargh. well bye
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May 24, 2016 01:32
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I had a friend who lived in Chicago but he died before I could visit. So I've never been to Chicago but I would like to go someday. Well, that's my Chicago story.
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May 24, 2016 01:32
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You spent all your time in the Loop with the rest of the tourists and you're surprised you got ripped off? The (good) neighborhoods are where the cool fun stuff is. That McDs was closed because no one goes to the loop on the weekends.
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May 24, 2016 01:38
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op loves to grill the south for racism but he just reviewed being in one of the three most racist cities in america. only one of them is in the south btw
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May 24, 2016 01:40
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Jastiger posted:Many goons have taken umbrage that I dare call Des Moines anything other than "Bad" and consistently raise up Chicago as an example of what a good Midwestern city should look like. So I took the plunge and went over to Chicago to go see what all this hubbub is about. Yeah. Someone told me you're fat. If you're fat then just shut the hell up right now.
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May 24, 2016 01:43
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this idiot drove all the way to chicago and went to mcdonalds first thing
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May 24, 2016 01:46
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Zeno-25 posted:You spent all your time in the Loop with the rest of the tourists and you're surprised you got ripped off? The (good) neighborhoods are where the cool fun stuff is.
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May 24, 2016 01:47
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He had it coming He had it coming He only had himself to blame If you'd have been there If you'd have seen it I betcha you would have done the same!
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May 24, 2016 01:53
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jastiger fight me in smash
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May 24, 2016 01:53
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New Sharif in Town posted:If you mean the one on Upper Wacker, if it was Sunday they were just closed. It was Sunday, so that makes sense. They had fresh buns but weren't open right then I guess? Des moines is better because none of those bad things happen there. I can enjoy the city and spend half the money and have just as much fun.
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May 24, 2016 01:56
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Putty posted:jastiger fight me in smash Bring it
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May 24, 2016 01:56
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cant get more on the spectrum than sperging out about an entire state
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May 24, 2016 01:56
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Jastiger posted:Everything is just too expensive and it doesn't need to be except its ~Chicago~. No, a beer doesn't need to cost $9, it probably doesn't even cost that much at a Cubs game, wtf. You're right, a plastic cup of Old Style at Wrigley costs $8.
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May 24, 2016 01:59
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Imagine writing huge effort posts with the goal of convincing strangers online that Iowa is cool. Jastiger, you deserve the emptiness you feel.
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May 24, 2016 02:04
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ChrisHansen posted:The last time I was in dc, I saw a homeless guy sleeping under a bush. He had an unobstructed view of the Washington monument AND the white house dome There's no dome on the White House you dumb sonuvabitch
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May 24, 2016 02:07
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I wish Jastiger was one of the 845828825858 murders each year in Chicago
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May 24, 2016 02:08
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This man has a sickness of the soul
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May 24, 2016 02:09
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yeah seriously he thinks iowa chop is a dish
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May 24, 2016 02:10
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the Minnesota Wild took a well-liked and popular minor league hockey team in Houston and moved them to des moines because they wanted to have their affiliate closer to where they are. just another reason why jastiger's dull whitebread city sucks
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May 24, 2016 02:12
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The wild are cool though? You lose.
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May 24, 2016 02:15
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Thanks for your review comparing a center cut pork chop to a hot dog and a pizza.
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May 24, 2016 02:16
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All I know about Des Moines came from brief scene in Stephen King's The Stand
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May 24, 2016 02:16
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because tl;dr
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May 24, 2016 02:17
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| # ? Apr 23, 2024 13:27 |
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Jastiger posted:Many goons have taken umbrage that I dare call Des Moines anything other than "Bad" and consistently raise up Chicago as an example of what a good Midwestern city should look like. So I took the plunge and went over to Chicago to go see what all this hubbub is about. on a scale of 1 to Lena Dunham, how fat is your wife? I'm thinking sleep apnea obese because you dropped her off at McDonald's at 11 am
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May 24, 2016 02:20
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