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Bienvenue to the thread for your 2016 European Championship host and easily the best looking team in the tournament, France! Please do not ask about Benzema. History One World Cup - 1998 Two European Championships - 1984 and 2000 Let's meet our vingt-trois! The Team Goalkeepers Hugo Lloris (Tottenham Hotspur)  Plays for noted poo poo chokers Tottenham, but is generally a very reliable keeper. Expected starter. Steve Mandanda (Olympique de Marseille)  Plays for a French team that is not PSG. Used to be pretty good, but who the gently caress watches Ligue 1 anyway? Benoit Costil (Stade Rennais)  Plays in Rennes, where they speak Breton. Defenders - Raphael Varane, the most likely partner for Koscielny in central defense, is out with an injury. Mamadou Sakho is on vacation. Where's Mexes? Laurent Koscielny (Arsenal)  World-class central defender, less prone to making rash challenges these days. Expected starter. Eliaquim Mangala (Manchester City)  Overpriced and poo poo, but it's not like they have many options in central defense after Koscielny. Expected starter. Bacary Sagna (Manchester City)  Old, but still pretty good. Expected starter. Patrice Evra (Juventus)  Old man playing in old folks' home. Expected starter. Christophe Jallet (Lyon)  Adil Rami (Sevilla)  Lucas Digne (Roma)  Samuel Umtiti (Lyon)  A bunch of guys taking up space. Still better than Jeremy Mathieu. Midfielders - Mathieu Valbuena is unavailable for comment. Paul Pogba (Juventus)  Arguably one of the best all-around midfielders in the world. Remember when he left Manchester United for free? Expected starter. N'Golo Kanté (Leicester City)  Emerged as a top-notch holding midfielder during Leicester's surprise championship season. Expected starter. Blaise Matuidi (Paris Saint-Germain)  Another top-notch holding midfielder, will probably play alongside Kanté to help shield the lovely defense. Expected starter. Yohan Kebab (Crystal Palace)  Crystal Palace's record signing. Started the season well, but then faded along with the rest of the squad. Lassana Diarra (Olympique de Marseille)  Still around and supposedly playing well, but nobody watches Ligue 1. Moussa Sissoko (Newcastle United)  Plays for Newcastle, therefore probably poo poo. Forwards - Karim Benzema is on the line, he says it's urgent Antoine Griezmann (Atletico de Madrid)  Has been in fantastic form for Atletico. Expected starter. Dimitri Payet (West Ham United)  Finally had a breakout season at West Ham after years puttering around Ligue 1. Expected starter. Oliver Giroud (Arsenal)  Top-six striker. Expected starter. André-Pierre Gignac (Tigres UANL)  He's still around and apparently playing well in Mexico. Probably floating across the Atlantic on a caravan. Anthony Martial (Manchester United)  Despite the ludicrous price tag, Tony Marshall ended up being an integral part of Manchester United's attack and possibly saved Van Gaal from a midseason firing. Likely super-sub during the tournament. Kingsley Coman (Bayern Munich)  Another super-exciting young talent, spent this season on loan with Bayern. Stupid haircut. What to expect? This is a young and absurdly talented team, and they have the home crowd behind them. They're in a poor group with Romania, Albania and Switzerland, and will likely face Ukraine or Poland in the round of 16, so a quarterfinal berth is likely. In a tournament without a stand-out team, they have as good of a chance as anyone else to win it all. Thanks for reading! 
curried lamb of God fucked around with this message at 21:57 on May 30, 2016 |
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May 30, 2016 18:03
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I watch Ligue 1, OP. Cheers.
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May 30, 2016 18:48
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Evra is still around? 
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May 30, 2016 18:58
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lol that defence Rest of the team looks really good though.
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May 30, 2016 19:01
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Are they gonna go on a strike this time as well?
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May 30, 2016 19:52
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Syncopated posted:Are they gonna go on a strike this time as well? Cantona has been shittirring with the media about the 'racist' exclusion of Ben Arfa and Benzema so maybe Is Payet really expected to start? Deschamps spent a decent amount of the season saying he doesnt have the attitude
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May 30, 2016 20:02
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Syncopated posted:Are they gonna go on a strike this time as well? Everyone else in France is on strike right now, they might as well join in
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May 30, 2016 20:19
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Spangly A posted:Cantona has been shittirring with the media about the 'racist' exclusion of Ben Arfa and Benzema so maybe He started today vs Cameroon, alongside Giroud and Coman up front. Giroud just scored a great goal after a brilliant pass from Pogba
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May 30, 2016 20:44
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gently caress france
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May 30, 2016 20:45
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surrender posted:He started today vs Cameroon, alongside Giroud and Coman up front. That was a sick assist https://streamable.com/mkrs frankenfreak posted:Evra is still around? He's still pretty good, or at the very least he is as a wingback in Juve's 3-5-2. Very consistent and he and Pogba link up quite well with each other.
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May 30, 2016 20:57
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What world wars did France win, OP? The thread title is a little.....misleading imo
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May 30, 2016 20:58
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I hope noted cool and good player Kingsley Coman does well for France, despite having a lovely haircut (also, he's a Bayern player OP) Dunban fucked around with this message at 21:15 on May 30, 2016 |
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May 30, 2016 21:12
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Dunban posted:I hope noted cool and good player Kingsley Coman does well for France, despite having a lovely haircut Yes I feel this should be changed in the OP. Payet just had another friggen incredible free kick goal. https://twitter.com/philousports/status/737386046636363776
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May 30, 2016 21:52
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trem_two posted:Payet just had another friggen incredible free kick goal. Jesus
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May 30, 2016 21:53
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I thought Coman was only on loan! Streamable for the Payet goal: https://streamable.com/etnv 
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May 30, 2016 21:55
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surrender posted:I thought Coman was only on loan! It's a 2 year loan with a permanent option that Bayern will pick up with 100% certainty.
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May 30, 2016 21:57
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surrender posted:I thought Coman was only on loan! Phwoaaaar
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May 30, 2016 22:28
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surrender posted:I thought Coman was only on loan! A few months ago I'd have said Payet was definitely going to stay at West Ham. One good season at Marseille and one at West Ham doesn't get top clubs to pay top-dollar for a 29-year old who just signed a new contract. Now I'm not so sure. He's absolutely ridiculous. As for France, they have to be favourites to win it. Slightly dodgy defence aside, that has to be the best squad in the Euros in terms of form
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May 30, 2016 22:47
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julian assflange posted:What world wars did France win, OP? The thread title is a little.....misleading imo world war one and world war two. in that order.
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May 31, 2016 15:36
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if Payet is starting and has the handle of the tournament ball he's going to have his Forlan moment imo except instead of overtraining he's just going to find out that not practicing at all is also bad
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May 31, 2016 17:49
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Breaking news: Lassana Diarra is out of the squad with a knee injury. Morgan Schneiderlin is in.
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May 31, 2016 23:39
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If France don't win it with that squad it's gonna be a huge failure, clear favorites imho
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May 31, 2016 23:48
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I thought Laporte was supposed to be the next big thing? Surprised he didn't make the squad given their centre backs.
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Jun 1, 2016 04:13
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Ewar Woowar posted:I thought Laporte was supposed to be the next big thing? Surprised he didn't make the squad given their centre backs. He's still recovering from breaking his leg.
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Jun 1, 2016 04:15
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That's a pretty good squad, strange that the French decided to take one of the midfielders who was integral to the team that won the premier league and England didn't... I hope we have a comedic french melt down and not another french victory in france.
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Jun 1, 2016 06:05
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For many years I've been wondering to myself why exactly did Oliver Giroud pop a frozen twix up his bum? Its such a weird, perverse thing to do and the only possible answer I can come up with is that there was probably no toblerone in the minibar.
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Jun 1, 2016 13:10
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wheres nzonzi
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Jun 1, 2016 13:20
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Seems everyone is telling Benzema to gently caress off with his racism thing, even SOS Racisme. What a moron
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Jun 1, 2016 20:29
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julian assflange posted:Seems everyone is telling Benzema to gently caress off with his racism thing, even SOS Racisme. What a moron lol, blackmails a team mate and then claims racism
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Jun 1, 2016 20:30
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I hope Deschamps sues Benzema as well as Cantona because I reckon Benzema is too stupid to know when to apologise and settle
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Jun 1, 2016 21:08
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Just found out Steve Mandanda has a brother names Parfait https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parfait_Mandanda
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Jun 2, 2016 15:49
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Hashtag Banterzone posted:Just found out Steve Mandanda has a brother names Parfait What about his other brothers Sundae and Bananasfoster?
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Jun 3, 2016 05:19
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France play Scotland tonight - does anyone have a stream for that?
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Jun 4, 2016 16:35
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I've been watching france wreck scotland and am preparing my anus for next weeks game Also the romanian announcers said france is winning because africans are better at the football than the whites, which is true I guess.
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Jun 4, 2016 20:57
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Putting the twix in the freezer now, then?
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Jun 4, 2016 21:01
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Scotland are probably more embarrassed by their kit than losing to this French squad
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Jun 4, 2016 21:15
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this team looks unbeatable tbh the midfield works so hard and they have so many awesome skill players that they can just put a ton of pressure up the pitch.
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Jun 4, 2016 21:23
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I'd love to see noted clean athlete Mamadou Sakho in there but Koscielny seems to be doing just fine
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Jun 4, 2016 21:27
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loving love me some big ollie giroud https://streamable.com/bd64
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Jun 4, 2016 21:28
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France is going to win the Euros. This team is stacked
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Jun 4, 2016 21:29
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