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   Hi everyone. This here is the Portugal thread. And that’s Portugal, in that map over there! What’s Portugal? Well, it’s a country, for one thing. Haha. Here, let me tell you a little bit more about Portugal: Portugal, oficialmente República Portuguesa,[9] [nota 9] é um país soberano[nota 10] unitário localizado no Sudoeste da Europa, cujo território se situa na zona ocidental da Península Ibérica e em arquipélagos no Atlântico Norte. O território português tem uma área total de 92 090 km²,[10] sendo delimitado a norte e leste por Espanha e a sul e oeste pelo oceano Atlântico, compreendendo uma parte continental e duasregiões autónomas: os arquipélagos dos Açores e da Madeira. Portugal é a nação mais a ocidente do continente europeu. O nome do país provém da sua segunda maior cidade, Porto, cujo nome latino-celtaera Portus Cale.[11] [12] Wasn’t that fun? Learning about new places is always fun. And you’ve probably never heard of Portugal, so better read up. This isn’t a geography thread, though. It’s a soccer one. And if there’s one thing you gotta know about Portuguese soccer, it’s this:     We never win! But that’s ok, since soccer is all about having fun with the ball and with your friends and just having a good time with some beers and with girls. But to lose while still having fun, you can’t just throw a bunch of guys into the field. No. No loving way. You need what we in the know call A Formation:  That’s a 4-3-3. Hah, don’t get confused by all those numbers. All it means is Portugal will play with 1 (one) goalkeeper, 4 (four) defenders, 3 (three) midfielders, and 3 (three) forwards. Crazy poo poo, right? Who would have ever thought Portugal would play with the same formation they’ve been playing with for the last 50 years? Nobody, that’s who. That’s what this thread is here for. “But MBM, what if those players don’t play, and some other players play?” Relax, bitch. I’ve got it covered. Here’s another team I wouldn’t be surprised to see us using:  That good enough for you? Of course not. How about this then: Rui Patrício Cedric – Bruno Alves - Pepe - Eliseu Moutinho-Danilo André Gomes Nani - Éder - Ronaldo That's the beauty of soccer. Playing with names and numbers in a computer program and pretending it's the real thing! Wow, what a fun thread. All this stuff nobody knows about, since we only have these international tournaments pretty much every year. Now let me tell you about some of the Portuguese players, since you probably don’t know most of the poo poo cloggers on the team.  That’s Rui Patricio, probably the best goalkeeper in the Portuguese league.  Oh, and over there's Adrien. Could he steal way Moutinho's central midfield position? And that’s Eliseu, one of the least consensual players in the squad but who’ll probably be our starting left-back with Fabio Coentrão injured.  And also over h--Who am I kidding? Nobody reads these loving threads, and we all know all this poo poo already. Besides, we all know you’re here for only one reason. Or maybe a couple of them. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mNU3aIJs88g THAT SMILE!!!         THOSE TRAPS!!!!!    THAT NECK!!!!!     THOSE ABS!!!!!       THAT rear end!!!!!!!!      THAT COCK!!!!!    THOSE FRIENDS!!!!       THOSE RIVALS!!!!      THAT BLING!!!!!!!       THOSE BABES!!!!!         THOSE GOALS!!!!!      THOSE BALLON D'ORS!!!!!!! 2008 -  2013 -  2014 -  2016 (?) -  THE MAN HIMSELF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  After a tenuous season in which he carried the White boys to the Champions League title once again, only injuries, the Devil, bad teammates and corrupt referees can keep Ronaldo away from glory. What do you think Cristiano, can you win the Euros for your beloved home country? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Szn33OgiMA God bless. Mean Bean Machine fucked around with this message at 00:20 on Jun 2, 2016 |
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Jun 2, 2016 00:17
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| # ¿ Apr 27, 2024 16:40 |
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alright here’s some other guys   Rui Patrício (Sporting): has been Portugal’s starting goalkeeper for a while now. The best goalkeeper playing in the Portuguese league Eduardo (Zagreb): old and poo poo Anthony Lopes (Lyon): young and might be good, I dunno I don’t watch the French league obviously     Pepe (Real Madrid): everybody loves Pepe! The most pleasant, fun-loving guy you’ll find in France this summer Bruno Alves (Fenerbahce): old and probably poo poo I dunno I don’t watch the Turkish league obviously Ricardo Carvalho (Monaco): haha, this guy still around? gently caress off already José Fonte (Southampton): probably really good since he plays in the best and most competitive league, the BPL, instead of fail poo poo leagues like the german one     Eliseu (Benfica): he’s poo poo also a Benfica player which makes him worse than Hitler Raphael Guerreiro (Lorient): young kid with lots of potential, would rather he start than Eliseu tbh Cedric Soares (Southampton): he’s solid Vieirinha (Wolfsburg): he’s ok    William Carvalho (Sporting): really good DM Danilo Pereira (Porto): really good DM, will probably start Renato Sanches (Benfica): revelation of the year in Portugal earned him a move to Bayern for 35 mil at 19 years old. A lot of potential, but very overrated     João Moutinho (Moutinho): everyone knows Moutinho. didn’t have a great season Adrien (Sporting): so maybe Adrien, one of the best midfielders in the Portuguese league in the past few seasons, can take his place? André Gomes (Valencia): good attacking midfielder, will probably start João Mário (Sporting): one of the best players of the season in Portugal. very good attacking midfielder, might start on the wings    Nani (Fenerbahce): everybody knows Nani Quaresma[ (Besiktas): and everybody knows Quaresma. they’re the same loving wingers we’ve been playing for the past 10 years Rafa (Braga): the best player in the Portuguese league not playing for one of the Big Three. he’s really good but still a bit green   Cristiano Ronaldo (Real Madrid): hell, Eder (Braga): he’s poo poo and the only striker in the team. good times You (TRP): You, the fan, the 12th man This is now a safe-space thread for all fans of Ronaldo and buddies. Haters gently caress off 
Mean Bean Machine fucked around with this message at 00:22 on Jun 2, 2016 |
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Jun 2, 2016 00:17
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El Hefe posted:PORRA! quote:This is now a safe-space thread for all fans of Ronaldo and buddies. Haters gently caress off
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Jun 2, 2016 01:06
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thank you BR, i hope all 15 TRP regulars enjoy it. i am looking forward to your albania thread. (also i meant tiring haha guess im pretty tired myself)quote:Hell, that almost looks like a good team except for the bad players. i think we can put up a pretty good XI and still leave some good midfielders on the bench, but yeah our defense is pretty bad and our striker is poo poo and we only have like 4 real attacking players, so if one of them gets injured or is out of form we have no other options. at least we aren't as bad as holland haha
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Jun 2, 2016 02:19
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Breath Ray posted:OP how do you pronounce owls boss Carvalhal? On the TV they say Carver-hal but I know that can't be right. Any ideas? cur-va-lhawl looks like the op, posted just yesterday, is already outdated. raphael guerreiro is apparently moving to dortmund for around €10 mil
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Jun 2, 2016 14:08
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portugal is going to do to england what prince charles did to that poor kid on the cover of that newspaper
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Jun 2, 2016 15:51
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No Pepe, Cedric, Ronaldo, Eder or André Gomes for this match. Think we might be seeing this midfield of Danilo-Moutinho-Adrien a lot against the stronger teams if it works out today. e: eliseu is so loving bad lol Mean Bean Machine fucked around with this message at 19:58 on Jun 2, 2016 |
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Jun 2, 2016 19:53
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this isnt great. i'm glad i watched episode 5 of 11.22.63 instead for the last 40 mins. no spoilers please, we are all ronaldo and james franco fans herequote:What's the reasoning for leaving out all those players? Just to give them some rest? yeah that and we still have one last friendly before our 1st euro match so the manager's still trying out some stuff here
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Jun 2, 2016 21:17
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African AIDS cum posted:Unfettered immigration lol quaresma making them english players look slow as hell. theyre all looking fat, pudgy. too much potato stew. we got this
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Jun 2, 2016 21:27
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mmmmmmh loved that little taste of what's to come. quality football on show tonight. i for one can't wait for euro 2016. football is alive? you bet
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Jun 2, 2016 21:40
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Ricardo Carvalho looked really good tonight tbh but it's pretty much 100% going to be Pepe + Bruno Alves, they played almost every qualification match
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Jun 3, 2016 00:36
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KFBR392 posted:Seriously who is the big fat dude, he must be rich or have a huge dick or something to be hanging with the alpha bros there hes ronaldos longtime bodyguard and a lovely fat mma fighter and no i didnt just sign my post haha
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Jun 6, 2016 01:41
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what a win against the powerhouse that is estonia. im not watching of course im leaving in 5 mins to watch the nice guys but from what im hearing this is another epic win for the portugal boys, with quaresma looking good and ronaldo looking better...phwoar
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Jun 8, 2016 20:45
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What do you guys think, should Quaresma start over Nani? He can't pull out performances like these against the better teams, but he's in way better form than Nani.
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Jun 9, 2016 00:40
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=scWpXEYZEGk here's the new nike ad ft ronaldo owning even in the body of a 14 year old povertinho and quickly becoming england's best player because all of theirs are turds
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Jun 9, 2016 13:40
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Fernando Santos is bad
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Jun 14, 2016 21:58
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Adrien for Moutinho, Cedric for Vierinha, Eder in as striker so we have a big lovely guy to win some loving headers and to distract the defenders while the others score the goals and João Mario on the wing. Lets start the petition and never talk about this again. Also Danilo looked real slow today
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Jun 14, 2016 22:17
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I haven't posted this before because I didn't want it to sound like I'm biased or blinded by team colors or something but hell, I'll say it: let's play Sporting's midfield. William Carvalho isn't necessarily better than Danilo, or Adrien better than Moutinho, or João Mário better than André Gomes/Nani, but this mishmash of Porto DM, Monaco CM, Valencia AM and Sporting AM isn't going to work. Players have no routines with each other, no dynamic, they've never played together and today's midfield was poo poo compared to what we can put out. Play William - Adrien - Mário, or put Mário on the wing like he plays at Sporting and put André Gomes who was good today in his spot, looks drat tasty to me. William or Adrien not working, get Sanches in there. These guys have more than 100 matches playing together, let's take advantage of it instead of having Moutinho (cause he's old) and Danilo (cause he's slow) staying back while Gomes and Mário have to drop back to get the ball. Fernando Santos, I'll give you one more chance; then I'll take over and carry these boys to glory. Last warning. also gently caress this 4-4-2 dumb poo poo, Ronaldo and Nani just drift to the wings and we have nobody on the area. Bring the 4-3-3 back ftw
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Jun 15, 2016 00:05
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straight up brolic posted:Andre Gomes was insanely good today, which is one of the positives. This lineup was a little bizarre and Moutinho sucks, but if Ronaldo performs well (he was pretty loving bad today tbh), I don't see why Portugal can't win the rest of their group games. that's what's gonna happen probably: Portugal will play against Austria and Hungary again with a subpar Moutinho and Vierinha, and Ronaldo and Nani being played out of position, eke out a couple of lovely wins and the manager will decide that team is good enough and we'll go out against the first good opponent we play because he didn't change poo poo up. meanwhile Cedric, Adrien, William, Rafa etc won't get a chance and we'll never know if they would have made for a better team. feels bad
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Jun 15, 2016 00:37
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I believe we will win.
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Jun 19, 2016 21:34
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Kwagga posted:What a fail team. Big talk but no results. Shameful! Don't worry my friend kwagga, our team will prove it is not all talk. We just need one more win against Hungary and we will definitely reach the top of the group, the summit if you will. Believe me, we will plant our flag right on top of the mountain that is group F. I agree that with all the expectations placed upon us and the months of preparation and expenses, to end it all by never leaving the bottom of the group or trying the climb the hill that has been placed in front of us would be absolutely shameful and a display of poor and cowardly character. That is not us. One step at a time, we're reaching the peak of the mountain. We're gonna make it our bitch.
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Jun 20, 2016 20:39
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4-4-2 again fml now with Eliseu at LB for some reason after Guerreiro being one of our only good players in the Euros lol
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Jun 22, 2016 16:31
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we should have gone for the win also we played so much better in a 4-3-3 gently caress Fernando Santos and those faggy players
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Jun 22, 2016 18:59
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ChainsawCharlie posted:Lolol Marcelo our president of the republic crashed the Flash interview.is there any câmera he wont get in front of? there isnt
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Jun 22, 2016 21:08
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it's coming home. The home of tasty fresh fish straight from the sea onto your plate, the home of skinny tanned small tits big asses brunettes, the home of some beers in the afternoon while u look at the cuties and then wine for dinner when u get rowdy with ur friends and then some shots at night when its time for the raping. Its coming home, the home of democracy that is. Portugal. Portugal will win. gently caress Croatia. loving pasty yellow teeth poor retards who live in a shithole with the gipsies. we're gonna gently caress those car jackers and drug fiends up. Its coming home.
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Jun 25, 2016 18:20
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Holy poo poo lmao he finally puts Cedric and the Sporting midfield everyone has been asking for in against loving Croatia instead of giving them minutes against the weaker teams to gel with the other players. Only took him 3 matches to do it. drat what management, very impressed. also this is just what we need, two centerbacks that havent played a minute together this Euros
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Jun 25, 2016 19:06
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It will
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Jun 25, 2016 19:24
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Sportings midfield owned, defense was class, Sanches was good as hell sub, Nani and Ronaldo didn't do poo poo, Ronaldo is wasted in a 4-4-2
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Jun 25, 2016 22:40
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Im imagining a William Carvalho-Adrien-Renato Sanches-João Mário midfield for the next match and smacking my lips and rubbing my thighs. Moutinho is bad and André Gomes looks exhausted. it would make for more cagey matches like todays but who cares as long as we win. We finally played all the players ppl have been asking for (Carvalho, Cedric, Adrien, Sanches) and they all owned. hope santos doesnt gently caress it up now
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Jun 26, 2016 02:48
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Ronaldo during the penalties. He's the one who told Moutinho to score one. Look at that passion, what a captain. He had a really bad match but who doesn't every now and then? At least he didn't choke and miss his penalty like that bitch Messi.
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Jul 1, 2016 19:08
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drat....were the best team in the world. And the best fans. And the best thread. Good job everyone
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Jul 6, 2016 21:58
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Mean Bean Machine posted:THOSE BALLON D'ORS!!!!!!! drat...My prediction in the OP is looking more likely than ever. Ronaldo WILL win the Ballon d'Or and I have already applied to be the one to give it to my boy. Dreams do come true. Good night. ALso RIP all grandpas
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Jul 7, 2016 00:33
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poo poo Farm posted:it seems like all the cool & good lads are from sporting and the rest of the country is piggy backing off of them? 8 of the 11 usual starters have been players made in Sporting but whos counting haha anyway we are all portuguese and thats what matters. although you might not think so when you hear my idiot Benfica neighbor hoot and holler every time Joao Mario misses a pass or a shot. the dumb oval office
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Jul 9, 2016 21:03
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same.......same
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Jul 10, 2016 18:06
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Brony Car posted:Congrats to all my favorite fellow Portugal National Team fans and the posters who stuck with us through all the loving poo poo. congrats to you too fellow Portugal fan tychan. we did it boys, we fr*aking did it. they tried to put us down, they tried to take us out, they thought we'd get eliminated by croatia ffs when has croatia ever been good? bunch of loving garbagemen. we're loving Portugal boys. all the manager had to do was play the team this thread wanted him to play and victory was guaranteed. rui patricio is the loving boss, i honestly believe with Santos in charge our defense is the best in Europe, raphael guerreiro is going to be a superstar, fonte has to be a starter from now on, pepe owns just owns, solid midfield that didnt get scared by those athletic french boys we knew they'd run out of gas, let the adrenaline dump take care of those kids, they didn't have the heart for 120 mins. weak rear end bitches. nani sucks rear end but he got a transfer out of turkey out of this so good for him, eder is a national hero and ronaldo bitch just look at the OP. So this is what it feels like, to be European champion. feels good...feels drat good
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Jul 11, 2016 02:27
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also good performance on the sideline Ronaldo making sure u were on every camera, that basically guaranteed your ballon d'or. brawn AND brains. what a loving legend
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Jul 11, 2016 02:28
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Montasque posted:
the greatest hero ever rooting for the Portugays. drat. i can die happy
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Jul 11, 2016 03:32
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Breath Ray posted:OMG What a championship that was. And Portugal...they never gave up, even when the rest of us said gently caress this at half time and started watching Les Mis on channel 4 instead lol
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Jul 11, 2016 08:45
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ha but seriously, a match that had everything from over hit through balls to free kicks sent spinning into the wall 
a terrific win for Portugal the rainsoaked windswept country famous for and named after its port, which is a kind of industrial harbour you can only find in every single other non landlocked country even the africab ones. Just wow..a special day for sport and basically what can you say but that the tournamwnt format deaperately needs to be rejigged to favour teams prepared to play entertaining attacking football like england
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if theres one word i never thought i'd hear being used to describe portugal its rainsoaked
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Jul 11, 2016 09:30
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Blue Star Error posted:he was a bit shite imo Yeah Renato's best match was against Poland, he didn't have a great final. But he was still important for the squad, all our other midfielders were of the same style and at least he brought in some youthfulness, like Ronaldo did in 2004. He can only get better at Bayern, especially with Ancelotti as manager instead of bald Pep playing him at fullback or something. Speaking of, my revelation was Raphael Guerreiro. Guy was outstanding. Dortmund were lucky to get him for €10 mil before the Euros, right now they would have had to pay at least 10 more. With him and Coentrão, our left-back position is looking pretty good for the future. Also some pretty crazy scenes on the streets of Lisbon today, it looks like the whole country has flooded in.
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Jul 11, 2016 18:50
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