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Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost
This but ships navigating in a narrow channel sounding five short and rapid blasts on their whistle the second you try to cross their bow at less than 1/2 mile in a seven meter sailboat. Bitch, I wasn't impeding your progress!

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Len
Jan 21, 2008

Pouches, bandages, shoulderpad, cyber-eye...

Bitchin'!


I once had a guy honk at me so I flew him the bird. Dude immediately gunned it to whip around me so he could cut me off, roll down his window, and scream at me for giving him the finger. I just pulled into the other lane and kept driving. rear end in a top hat deserved it.

Sponge Baathist
Jan 30, 2010

by FactsAreUseless
I honk until red lights change and traffic i.e. Me gets moving. I made a man driving a large truck so mad he parked his truck in traffic to get out to challenge me to a fight and punched my car. Those two sentences are completely unrelated.

XMNN
Apr 26, 2008
I am incredibly stupid
last week I was waiting next to a Mercedes at some lights going on to the slip road for the motorway

he pulled away really slowly so I passed him because I was in the outside lane and accelerating normally then merged and moved out into the middle lane

about two minutes later the guy passes me on the inside and pulls out right in front of me so I go over into the outside lane, then he pulls out in front of me again so I just go back in and slow down

then he moves back in front of me and is just driving really aggressively in super heavy traffic on a really dangerous stretch of road as I tried to avoid driving into him/anyone else

which went on for about 5minutes then for some reason when we hit free flowing traffic and could drive fast he goes into the inside lane and starts doing 60 mph

I have no idea what it was about my guess is he didn't like being overtaken by someone driving a smaller car or something to do with all the chemical plants in the area poisoning the locals

CJacobs
Apr 17, 2011

Reach for the moon!

Jukeboxblues posted:

Seriously the only thing that annoys me on the road. If you're going to buy a $500, 000 sports car, loving use it correctly. If you want to sit 20 under for no real reason, buy one of those terrible 4wd's that cant go off road.

They want to go 20 under because it forces people to look at their cool car they spent 500,000 dollars on

PANIC ON FUNKOTRON
Jan 7, 2006

EARL IS A FAT CUNT
Just get out the loving way then you chavvy dinlow.

Bob Saget IRL
Oct 24, 2014

I had a lady honk at me as soon as the light turned green once. I just laughed and drove normally, and, when she could, she sped to pass me. This time, it was I who was behind her at the very next red light, just a couple hundred feet up the road. So, as soon as the light turned green, I honked and laughed. She stopped a moment, got out of her car and started yelling. I rolled my window down and laughed while showing her one of my fingers.




I really hope she died in a horrid manner alone.

vyst
Aug 25, 2009



Bob Saget IRL posted:

I had a lady honk at me as soon as the light turned green once. I just laughed and drove normally, and, when she could, she sped to pass me. This time, it was I who was behind her at the very next red light, just a couple hundred feet up the road. So, as soon as the light turned green, I honked and laughed. She stopped a moment, got out of her car and started yelling. I rolled my window down and laughed while showing her one of my fingers.




I really hope she died in a horrid manner alone.

Which finger did you show her

BIG-DICK-BUTT-FUCK
Jan 26, 2016

by Fluffdaddy

PANIC ON FUNKOTRON posted:

you chavvy dinlow.

Lol is this real English

communism bitch
Apr 24, 2009

PANIC ON FUNKOTRON posted:

Just get out the loving way then you chavvy dinlow.

Pompey represent

communism bitch
Apr 24, 2009

BIG-DICK-BUTT-gently caress posted:

Lol is this real English

Stop squinnying about it

ScratchAndSniff
Sep 28, 2008

This game stinks
I once honked at someone and then he shot me. Now I'm a ghost. Ooooooo!

T.S. Smelliot
Apr 23, 2010

by FactsAreUseless

Applewhite posted:

This but ships navigating in a narrow channel sounding five short and rapid blasts on their whistle the second you try to cross their bow at less than 1/2 mile in a seven meter sailboat. Bitch, I wasn't impeding your progress!

Lol gently caress sailboats they're doing this bc anyone in a seven meter sailboat is inevitably a hippy nudist hosed up out of their heads on God knows what with an already precarious command over their vessel and the captain doesn't need the poo poo that "merchant cargo ship rams poor local's dinghy" brings. Seriously having a seven meter sailboat has the same connotations making liberal use of patchouli oil and owning a windowless van not used for work purposes brings

The Kingfish
Oct 21, 2015


I live in the Midwest where nobody ever honks their horn unless there is danger of an accident.

T.S. Smelliot
Apr 23, 2010

by FactsAreUseless
Like if you own a seven meter sailboat I'm going to think it's safe to assume this is you

Falun Bong Refugee
Dec 14, 2015

by FactsAreUseless

Eustace Tilly posted:

The longer you honk the longer I'm just going to sit here snorting crushed Addyi off the dashboard.

Put your foot on the loving gas pedal you mouth breathing moron. How hard is that?

noctambulous nebab
May 12, 2016

by zen death robot
You were definitely sitting there like a ditz for several long moments Op.

ScratchAndSniff
Sep 28, 2008

This game stinks
What I'm learning from this thread is that boaters are judgy assholes.

ziasquinn
Jan 1, 2006

Fallen Rib

Hell Yeah posted:

i do this and honk as long as possible like a full 3 seconds and also i don't care how long you make me wait it's worth it to honk.

One time a guy in a pick up did this then passed across a double yellow throwing his dog around in the truck bed like garbage. Reported the insane man to the police and I guess it was a slow news day cause it was on the news he was amped the gently caress out on meth and carrying enough to get distribution charges. Hell loving yeah

The Bananana
May 21, 2008

This is a metaphor, a Christian allegory. The fact that I have to explain to you that Jesus is the Warthog, and the Banana is drepanocytosis is just embarrassing for you.



Metagrubs posted:

keep honking im reloading

Me, irl

Chief McHeath
Apr 23, 2002

I like it when I'm cruising in neutral towards a red light and someone honks at me. Like looky here rear end in a top hat, this light is goddamn RED you're gonna have to stop anyway.

OXBALLS DOT COM
Sep 11, 2005

by FactsAreUseless
Young Orc

Angry Birds Suicide posted:

Like if you own a seven meter sailboat I'm going to think it's safe to assume this is you



This looks like george Zimmerman's hairy brother

Chief McHeath
Apr 23, 2002

But I like it most because then I get out of my car to shake my junk at them.


GOOOOT EEEEEEEEMMM

Free Cheese
Sep 16, 2005
Come on, it's free
Buglord
You honkin at me? I SAID YOU HONKIN AT ME!!? Why you motherfucker- *drives off road into ditch, explodes*

med school head
Apr 17, 2012
if you use your horn you are a loving bitch

vyst
Aug 25, 2009



gargle chome posted:

if you use your horn you are a loving bitch

This. If you're really that pissed off throw bricks at the car

Turtle Sandbox
Dec 31, 2007

by Fluffdaddy
If you aren't ready to go when the light hits green you should be barred from driving, getting worthless shitters that make driving suck off the road would be the best thing ever.

DONKEY SALAMI
Jun 28, 2008

donkey? donkey?

I wish there were two tones for horns. Sometimes you do want person ahead of you to look up but not annoyed or angry

They're just looking down at Radio or phone or nutz

After a while want them to look up but that you're not going psycho

a few DRUNK BONERS
Mar 25, 2016

if you own a boat you should probably be shot just spitballing here

Kuato
Feb 25, 2005

"I CAN'T BELIEVE I ATE THE WHOLE THING"
Buglord
When I lived in DC this heavy set African American lady drove up on the sidewalk, yelled at us and did the finger wag head shaking (moving it side to side while wagging her finger), then she ran the redlight. poo poo was awesome and had us in stitches.

republicant
Apr 5, 2010
I'm learning how to drive a stick shift and am probably responsible for plenty of other people's road rage. I'm slow to go at green lights because I'm still getting the clutch/gas transition just right, I'm super hesitant to turn left at a green light unless it's completely clear because there's a nonzero chance of my truck stalling, and if I'm stopped uphill and can't accelerate fast enough to avoid rolling backwards and hitting the car behind me then I will just sit with my hazard lights on until they go around me. It sucks but it's better than causing an accident.

SweetMercifulCrap!
Jan 28, 2012
Lipstick Apathy
I think cars should have a "polite" horn and an "angry" horn because some people assume any horn honk means you're pissed at them.

ScratchAndSniff
Sep 28, 2008

This game stinks

a few DRUNK BONERS posted:

if you own a boat you should probably be shot just spitballing here

fabergay egg
Mar 1, 2012

it's not a rhetorical question, for politely saying 'you are an idiot, you don't know what you are talking about'


sweetmercifulcrap posted:

I think cars should have a "polite" horn and an "angry" horn because some people assume any horn honk means you're pissed at them.

the polite horn is lightly tapping it for a split second, hth

SIDS Vicious
Jan 1, 1970


The Bananana posted:

lol

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

i disagree with this probation and feel that saying lol or lmao or even rofl or lmbo is absolutely a valid response to an actually funny post in GBS this is not me trying to be dissenting this is just my opinion

This Jacket Is Me
Jan 29, 2009
That was a bullshit probation.

Cthulu Carl
Apr 16, 2006

SLICK GOKU BABY posted:

You suck at driving that's why. You're supposed to pull into the intersection and make the left turn when the light turns red. gently caress you for not getting that.

Edit - Seriously gently caress you.

I used to have this argument with a girlfriend like every time we turned left. She was adamant in her belief that you NOT supposed to do this because "Oh my god, if you wait for the light to turn red you're running the red light and you're gonna get shot by cops" or whatever bullshit the backwoods Kentucky shithole driver's ed put in her head. gently caress that, it's called TAKING CONTROL OF THE INTERSECTION and it is a legitimate means to establish dominance over the other cars and claim your place as Alpha of the Road.

JerryLee
Feb 4, 2005

THE RESERVED LIST! THE RESERVED LIST! I CANNOT SHUT UP ABOUT THE RESERVED LIST!
Hmm yes we're all in rush hour traffic and we all presumably want to get home as expeditiously as possible, so let's make this intersection that could let ten of us through per green only let five of us through at a time instead because half of us can't find our goddamn gas pedals

-the drivers in my area, apparently

darkhand
Jan 18, 2010

This beard just won't do!
cars don't honk, people honk

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SIDS Vicious
Jan 1, 1970


darkhand posted:

cars don't honk, people honk

and geese, as well

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