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Nolan Arenado
May 8, 2009

I stand behind you in line at the store with a smile on my face...and a gun under my shirt and you are none the wiser, yet you are safer for having me next to you. I won't shoot you. My gun won't pull it's own trigger. It is securely holstered with the trigger covered. It can't just go off. However, rest assured that if a lunatic walks into the grocery store and pulls out a rifle, I will draw my pistol and protect myself and my family and therefore protect you and your family. I may get shot before I can pull the trigger...but, I won't die in a helpless blubbering heap on the floor begging for my life or my child's life. Know that if I die it will be in a pile of spent shell casings; I won't be that victim. I choose not to be. As for you, I don't ask you to carry a gun. If you are not comfortable, then please don't. But I would like to keep my right to choose to not be a helpless victim. There is evil in the world and if evil has a gun, I want one too... A shout out to all the legal and law abiding citizens that CCW for protection of themselves AND OTHERS in this great nation.
Copy and paste if you believe this too.

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SealHammer
Jul 4, 2010
Click to understand my bad faith posting.

XMNN posted:

have an escape route planned beforehand and get out before more police respond

disguise yourself as a hostage

improvised body armour

regularly maintain and practice with your murder weapon

recruit an accomplice

listen here buddy, real tactical shooters don't IMPROVISE body armor, they buy it from ar500 the way god intended. inshallah.

JiveHonky
May 12, 2001

by zen death robot
Grimey Drawer

OctoberBlues posted:

I stand behind you in line at the store with a smile on my face...and a gun under my shirt and you are none the wiser, yet you are safer for having me next to you. I won't shoot you. My gun won't pull it's own trigger. It is securely holstered with the trigger covered. It can't just go off. However, rest assured that if a lunatic walks into the grocery store and pulls out a rifle, I will draw my pistol and protect myself and my family and therefore protect you and your family. I may get shot before I can pull the trigger...but, I won't die in a helpless blubbering heap on the floor begging for my life or my child's life. Know that if I die it will be in a pile of spent shell casings; I won't be that victim. I choose not to be. As for you, I don't ask you to carry a gun. If you are not comfortable, then please don't. But I would like to keep my right to choose to not be a helpless victim. There is evil in the world and if evil has a gun, I want one too... A shout out to all the legal and law abiding citizens that CCW for protection of themselves AND OTHERS in this great nation.
Copy and paste if you believe this too.

the bushido code lives on




*gong*

Dave Concepcion
Mar 19, 2012
get yourself an AR-15

it's a very, very good gun, better and more reliable in fact than the AK

satanic splash-back
Jan 28, 2009

nobody builds memorials for the living

bag em and tag em
Nov 4, 2008

OctoberBlues posted:

I stand behind you in line at the store with a smile on my face...and a gun under my shirt and you are none the wiser, yet you are safer for having me next to you. I won't shoot you. My gun won't pull it's own trigger. It is securely holstered with the trigger covered. It can't just go off. However, rest assured that if a lunatic walks into the grocery store and pulls out a rifle, I will draw my pistol and protect myself and my family and therefore protect you and your family. I may get shot before I can pull the trigger...but, I won't die in a helpless blubbering heap on the floor begging for my life or my child's life. Know that if I die it will be in a pile of spent shell casings; I won't be that victim. I choose not to be. As for you, I don't ask you to carry a gun. If you are not comfortable, then please don't. But I would like to keep my right to choose to not be a helpless victim. There is evil in the world and if evil has a gun, I want one too... A shout out to all the legal and law abiding citizens that CCW for protection of themselves AND OTHERS in this great nation.
Copy and paste if you believe this too.

I have a gun. I could shoot you. I could kill any one of you. I won't. But oh god yes, I could. I have so much power in my hands, and you don't even know it. I just wait. Wait for the moment when I can unleash it. There will be blood and gunsmoke. Oh yes. Oh yes there will! I am the sword of GOD ALMIGHTY AMERICA AMERICA AMERICA

new friend from school
May 19, 2008

by Azathoth

OctoberBlues posted:

I stand behind you in line at the store with a smile on my face...and a gun under my shirt and you are none the wiser, yet you are safer for having me next to you. I won't shoot you. My gun won't pull it's own trigger. It is securely holstered with the trigger covered. It can't just go off. However, rest assured that if a lunatic walks into the grocery store and pulls out a rifle, I will draw my pistol and protect myself and my family and therefore protect you and your family. I may get shot before I can pull the trigger...but, I won't die in a helpless blubbering heap on the floor begging for my life or my child's life. Know that if I die it will be in a pile of spent shell casings; I won't be that victim. I choose not to be. As for you, I don't ask you to carry a gun. If you are not comfortable, then please don't. But I would like to keep my right to choose to not be a helpless victim. There is evil in the world and if evil has a gun, I want one too... A shout out to all the legal and law abiding citizens that CCW for protection of themselves AND OTHERS in this great nation.
Copy and paste if you believe this too.

Shadow0
Jun 16, 2008


If to live in this style is to be eccentric, it must be confessed that there is something good in eccentricity.

Grimey Drawer
I considered buying and wearing body armor all the time, but apparently it's highly regulated and hard to get in some places. Also I guess people would feel uncomfortable if I were wearing it around them; I should just get a gun so everyone feels safe.

Woden
May 6, 2006

BeefThief posted:

repeal the second amendment

bag em and tag em
Nov 4, 2008

Shadow0 posted:

I considered buying and wearing body armor all the time, but apparently it's highly regulated and hard to get in some places. Also I guess people would feel uncomfortable if I were wearing it around them; I should just get a gun so everyone feels safe.

You have a God given right to own GUNS but just hold the phone if you want something that makes it more difficult to be killed by a gun.

Booblord Zagats
Oct 30, 2011


Pork Pro
It's a 3 step process with optional 4th

1. Run up and kick shooter in stomach or genitals

2. turn around and place shooter's head on top of your shoulders but under forearm in a cradle while kicking your legs straight out and falling to the mat, on your rear end

3. Quickly roll stunned assailant over and wait for a 3 count

4(optional). Gets two beers and a Hell Yeah!

LGD
Sep 25, 2004

RedMage129 posted:

You have a God given right to own GUNS but just hold the phone if you want something that makes it more difficult to be killed by a gun.

there are almost no federal laws relating to body armor, the only ones of note being that people who have been convicted of a violent felony cannot possess it (with an exception for those who wear it in the course of their job duties, with prior written consent from an employer), and you get an enhanced sentence if you wear it during the commission of a violent/drug-related federal crime

any restrictions on it are 100% state or local policies, generally in the same areas with extensive firearm prohibitions-i.e. the last attempt to regulate it federally I know about was a proposal for a universal ban advanced by a Democratic Representative from California

LGD fucked around with this message at 20:01 on Jun 14, 2016

yogizh
Oct 12, 2015
Dumb Helicopter Joke Enthusiast
Stay home and :justpost:

Bob James
Nov 15, 2005

by Lowtax
Ultra Carp
Wear garlic around your neck.

Whooping Crabs
Apr 13, 2010

Sorry for the derail but I fuckin love me some racoons
When playing dead, make sure to poo poo your pants because that's what happens when you die.

Sophy Wackles
Dec 17, 2000

> access main security grid
access: PERMISSION DENIED.





Show the shooter your tiny penis and he will take pity on you.

Ork of Fiction
Jul 22, 2013
Run face first into the bullets while I leave out the back.

Ork of Fiction
Jul 22, 2013

Ork of Fiction posted:

Run face first into the bullets while I leave out the back.

This is my advice, for you.

A ILL BREAKFAST
Jun 9, 2007

*unsheathes katana*
dont get shot

TheBlackDuke
Jan 18, 2015

Stop, drop, and roll. This works before and after being mass-shot.

Dreddout
Oct 1, 2015

You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you.

This one weird trick, active shooters hate it!

Dreddout fucked around with this message at 20:46 on Jun 14, 2016

Pimpcasso
Mar 13, 2002

VOLS BITCH
dont be gay

Windows 98
Nov 13, 2005

HTTP 400: Bad post

vols bitch posted:

dont be gay

Poignant

.lnk to the past
May 3, 2005

psoting while drunk

Sound posted:

One strange trick for surviving mass shootings:

http://m.imgur.com/EYR69oN?r

Slightly :nws:

he died doing what he loved

various cheeses
Jan 24, 2013

Live your life, you have a greater chance of being struck by lightning

John Denver Hoxha
May 31, 2014

What a persistent nightmare!
....but enough about my posts
get shot on purpose... they never expect this trick

Rockman Reserve
Oct 2, 2007

"Carbons? Purge? What are you talking about?!"

various cheeses posted:

Live your life, you have a greater chance of being struck by lightning

hmmm since more people died at pulse in one weekend than died annually to lightning strikes in america over the past ten years I am actually going to say that you're a retard or a liar

Robo Reagan
Feb 12, 2012

by Fluffdaddy
level IV body armor is available to civilians for purchase

Captain Splashback
Jan 1, 2007

BY APPOINTMENT TO HER MAJESTY
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
SPLASHBACK HOLDINGS LTD
PUCKINS AND PRINTERS PURVEYORS
Wait, you actually want to survive a mass shooting?

Lol. Okay, goons. Goodnight.

Android Apocalypse
Apr 28, 2009

The future is
AUTOMATED
and you are
OBSOLETE

Illegal Hen
Not mass shooting, but my favorite story I heard from a former IDF guy was how he was at a cafe in Jerusalem when a bomb went off. He survived because there was a big fat guy between him & the explosion.

What I'm trying to say is surround yourself with people fatter than you. The bullets/explosions/death will be absorbed by their rolls of flesh.

ANIME IS BLOOD
Sep 4, 2008

by zen death robot
so thats why Trump keeps Christie around

gleebster
Dec 16, 2006

Only a howler
Pillbug

Ryoshi posted:

hmmm since more people died at pulse in one weekend than died annually to lightning strikes in america over the past ten years I am actually going to say that you're a retard or a liar

Just how many people were struck by lighting at that nightclub in ten years?

Lamebot
Sep 8, 2005

ロボ顔菌~♡
Don't commit abominable, depraved acts of lust in the face of our Lord??? Hrmmm???

Murray Mantoinette
Jun 11, 2005

THE  POSTS  MUST  FLOW
Clapping Larry

paul_soccer10 posted:

stage a decoy bomb attack far from your true target to delay police response time

Young Freud
Nov 26, 2006

LGD posted:

there are almost no federal laws relating to body armor, the only ones of note being that people who have been convicted of a violent felony cannot possess it (with an exception for those who wear it in the course of their job duties, with prior written consent from an employer), and you get an enhanced sentence if you wear it during the commission of a violent/drug-related federal crime

any restrictions on it are 100% state or local policies, generally in the same areas with extensive firearm prohibitions-i.e. the last attempt to regulate it federally I know about was a proposal for a universal ban advanced by a Democratic Representative from California

The big issue with body armor, especially body armor rated against rifle calibers, is that it gets heavy. A laptop-sized plate that you can stuff in your backpack or laptop bag weights about 8 pounds, plus whatever else you're carrying in it. A plate carrier with a front and back plate weigh about 12-22 pounds total, depending on how big you are.

Android Bicyclist posted:

Not mass shooting, but my favorite story I heard from a former IDF guy was how he was at a cafe in Jerusalem when a bomb went off. He survived because there was a big fat guy between him & the explosion.

What I'm trying to say is surround yourself with people fatter than you. The bullets/explosions/death will be absorbed by their rolls of flesh.

.223 full-metal-jacketed bullets will completely fragment with the first 8 inches of penetration, so if their abdominal diameter is greater than 10 inches, you have no fear from overpenetration from .223/5.56mm rifles.

Fat-Lip-Sum-41.mp3
Nov 15, 2003
stay home and play video games

spud
Aug 27, 2003

by LITERALLY AN ADMIN
Look like you would be a waste of a bullet....works for me every time.

Man Whore
Jan 6, 2012

ASK ME ABOUT SPHERICAL CATS
=3



Start a mass shooting scenario first, so that you attain their scent. They will then ignore you because they will think you are one of their own.

Mr. Meagles
Apr 30, 2004

Out here, everything hurts


i have been shooting my body in non-lethal places to build up an immunity to bullets

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Nolan Arenado
May 8, 2009

Ryoshi posted:

hmmm since more people died at pulse in one weekend than died annually to lightning strikes in america over the past ten years I am actually going to say that you're a retard or a liar

Good post, made me laugh.

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