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You all know the late Roger Ebert. He was a movie critic, historian and some say, expert. I myself have always valued his cinematic opinion...until now. Below are the 36 movies that he detested. I'm pretty cool with most of these, but The Usual Suspects? 1. Armageddon. “The movie is an assault on the eyes, the ears, the brain... 2. The Brown Bunny. "I had a colonoscopy once, and they let me watch it on TV. 3. Jason X. "'This sucks on so many levels.' 4. Mad Dog Time. "'Mad Dog Time' is the first movie I have seen that does not improve... 5. The Usual Suspects. "Once again, my comprehension began to slip... 6. Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo. "[The title character] makes a living prostituting himself... 7. Mr. Magoo. “Magoo drives a red Studebaker convertible... 8. Spice World. "Spice World is obviously intended as a ripoff... 9. Good Luck Chuck. "There is a word for this movie, and that word is: Ick." 10. Freddy Got Fingered. "This movie doesn't just scrape the bottom of the barrel... 11. Corky Romano. “‘Corky Romano’ is like a dead zone of comedy... 12. Charlie’s Angels. “‘Charlie’s Angels’ is like the trailer for a video game movie... 13. Mannequin. “A lot of bad movies are fairly throbbing with life. ‘Mannequin’ is dead... 14. Exit to Eden. “I’m sorry, but I just don’t get Rosie O’Donnell... 15. Hocus Pocus. “Of the film’s many problems, the greatest may be that... 16. Tommy Boy. “No one is funny in ‘Tommy Boy.’ 17. The Village. “Eventually the secret of Those, etc., is revealed. It’s a crummy secret... 18. The Love Guru. “Myers has some funny moments, but this film could have been written on toilet walls... 19. She’s Out of Control. “What planet did the makers of this film come from... 20. Summer School. “You see it, you leave the theater, and then it evaporates... 21. Clifford. “It’s not bad in any usual way. It’s bad in a new way all its own... 22. North. "I hated this movie. Hated hated hated hated hated this movie... 23. 200 Cigarettes. "Maybe another 200 cigarettes would have helped.. 24. Death to Smoochy. "In all the annals of the movies, few films have been this odd... 25. Saving Silverman. "Saving Silverman is so bad in so many different ways... 26. The Jazz Singer. "Diamond's whole presence in this movie is offensively narcissistic... 27. Ghost Dad. On Bill Cosby: "He overacts in the most unconvincing way... 28. Ace Ventura, Pet Detective. "Most of the people look as if they would rather be in other movies... 29. Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot!. "Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot! is one of those movies so dimwitted... 30. The Dukes of Hazzard. "Of course you don't have to be smart ... 31. Godzilla (1998). "Going to see Godzilla at the Palais of the Cannes Film Festival is like attending a satanic ritual... 32. The Bucket List. "The Bucket List is a movie about two old codgers who are nothing like people... 33. Dirty Love. "I would like to say more, but—no, I wouldn't... 34. Battlefield Earth. "This movie is awful in so many different ways... 35. The Flintstones in Viva Rock Vegas. "This is an ideal first movie for infants... 36. Pink Flamingos. "John Waters' Pink Flamingos has been... Link to article. 
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Jun 19, 2016 07:52
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| # ? Apr 24, 2024 07:28 |
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one of them is a black face centered movie, prob a good choice for this list
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Jun 19, 2016 08:04
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LOVE LOVE SKELETON posted:one of them is a black face centered movie, prob a good choice for this list bamboozled was good
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Jun 19, 2016 08:07
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what does roger ebert have against jews
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Jun 19, 2016 08:08
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he killed himself so that he wouldnt have to watch the new ghostbusters movie
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Jun 19, 2016 08:09
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Death to Smoochy wasn't good, but it wasn't horrible. It was just...odd, as he put it.
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Jun 19, 2016 08:09
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Schlonged Again posted:he killed himself so that he wouldnt have to watch the new ghostbusters movie I saw the new preview the other night. No one in the theater laughed. One guy sarcastically cheered when it was over.
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Jun 19, 2016 08:10
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the ghostbusters should've been the villains in the new movie and the protagonist should've been casper the friendly ghost
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Jun 19, 2016 08:12
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The new trailer has a scene where stay puft is wandering down the street and falls on them. Then it turns out it was a float. Really really lame. There is no where they could go w/ stay puft and not been bad but that was reallly really bad and stupid and the movie is going to be really bad. The NBA commercials are interesting, though.
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Jun 19, 2016 08:15
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I mean, I'd watch Kobe in a ghostbusters movie directed by Spike Lee.
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Jun 19, 2016 08:15
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I like Ebert but his reviews are very subjective (duh) and a lot of the time he shits on movies he just doesn't get regardless of if they're good or not
Tolkien minority fucked around with this message at 08:21 on Jun 19, 2016 |
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Jun 19, 2016 08:17
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Ebert gave a negative review to Cable Guy, between that and Death To Smoochy he really seemed to dislike dark, spiteful, misanthropic humor and that's where I part ways with his opinions
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Jun 19, 2016 08:18
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Cable Guy is good, too. Ebert was cool but he was no Armond White.
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Jun 19, 2016 08:20
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Him posted:
What? This movie owns. Yeah it gets a little corny near the end with the Dan Ackroyd evil businessman stuff but I watch the whole movie in full any time I catch it. If Ebert (or Evert as the OP calls him) didn't laugh at the scene when Farley is petting the piece of bread then I don't know why he was reviewing comedies.
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Jun 19, 2016 08:49
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Him posted:5. The Usual Suspects. quote:16. Tommy Boy. quote:32. The Bucket List. Most of that list I totally get, but these particular ones puzzle me. mom and dad fight a lot fucked around with this message at 08:58 on Jun 19, 2016 |
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Jun 19, 2016 08:53
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thats a good list, but I'm sorry Ghost Dad is a great movie 
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Jun 19, 2016 08:56
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Jun 19, 2016 08:57
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Babe wasn't on his list though.
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Jun 19, 2016 09:03
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That guy hated Freddie Got Fingered and said Videogames aren't art....his punishment? Dying with half his face gone. I did like most of his reviews though, RIP Richard Egbert.
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Jun 19, 2016 09:04
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Shut up nerds
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Jun 19, 2016 09:07
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gently caress films yo i watch fuckin movies bitch
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Jun 19, 2016 09:08
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If you figure out the twist to the Usual Suspects it sucks. Also if you don't figure it out I suspect.
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Jun 19, 2016 09:10
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I liked Summer School. It was a fun 80s flick. 
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Jun 19, 2016 09:20
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Risky posted:I liked Summer School. It was a fun 80s flick. Me too. For whatever reason that movie was regular viewing in my house growing up. I always waited for that scene where the whole class pretends to be murdered, it was my favorite. I saw it enough times as a kid I could probably write a pretty close screenplay from memory.
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Jun 19, 2016 10:03
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I'd watch every movie on that list if it meant I never had to see Clifford again. If you cheat you could point out there's thousands of much worse vhs, tv, and home made movies out there, but if you're going by movies that made it to theater...well, those still aren't nearly bad enough. But Clifford. Never watch Clifford.
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Jun 19, 2016 10:09
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Lol if Pink Flamingos isn't your favourite film just for the singing anus.
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Jun 19, 2016 10:12
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In Jason X Jason killed to hologram ladies by stuffing them in a hologram sleeping bag and swinging them into a hologram tree
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Jun 19, 2016 10:20
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he never reviewed howard the duck, so 37 films
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Jun 19, 2016 10:22
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He saw Doom House and loved it.
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Jun 19, 2016 10:30
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i dont get rosie o donnald either
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Jun 19, 2016 10:32
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Bob James posted:He saw Doom House and loved it. what about mood hous
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Jun 19, 2016 10:33
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Iron Prince posted:what about gloom hous
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Jun 19, 2016 10:34
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Flubby posted:I'd watch every movie on that list if it meant I never had to see Clifford again. If you cheat you could point out there's thousands of much worse vhs, tv, and home made movies out there, but if you're going by movies that made it to theater...well, those still aren't nearly bad enough. But Clifford. Never watch Clifford. I want someone to set me up A Clockwork Orange style and scrub my brain of any and all traces of Clifford. I'd thank them profusely as the cold metal clips held my eyes open, the sting of saline drops against dry eyes as I watched subliminal images of Martin Short and Charles Grodin being drawn and quartered. Then I'd smile and whisper into the dark room: im gay
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Jun 19, 2016 10:42
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THIS PIG DONE A poo poo ON HIS OWN BALLS!!
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Jun 19, 2016 10:54
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just a little reminder that Ebert gave zookeeper 3 OUT OF 4 STARS!
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Jun 19, 2016 11:05
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Ace Ventura is amazing but I also like Roger Ebert so hey all is good here. Take it easy guys.
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Jun 19, 2016 11:11
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ElectricSheep posted:I want someone to set me up A Clockwork Orange style and scrub my brain of any and all traces of Clifford. 
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Jun 19, 2016 11:13
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Godzilla (1998) is one of like 3 movies that I've ever walked out on. What a turd on pig balls that movie is.
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Jun 19, 2016 11:32
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He got really morally outraged over Blue Velvet for some reason. I watched the Siskel and Ebert segment on it and Siskel was like "Roger, it's only a movie..."
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Jun 19, 2016 12:22
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Oberleutnant posted:THIS PIG DONE A poo poo ON HIS OWN BALLS!! A shameful pig.
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Jun 19, 2016 12:27
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