|
The Mighty Northwestern Wildcats (Bitch) Last season, Northwestern shocked the world by winning 10 games for just the fourth time in school history. They opened the season with a stunning upset of Stanford, which the LAMESTREAM MEDIA and MEWLING PLAYOFF COMMITTEE tried to take away from them because of  body clocks. Northwestern won with a suffocating defense and a hyperconservative offense that involved giving the ball to Justin Jackson The Ball Carrier 30 times. They also featured a freshman quarterback who led them to one of the worst passing offenses in the country. The Wildcats' strategy of punting and unleashing the defense was good enough to win games in the Big Ten West. A lot of football analysts think last year was a fluke. Northwestern won a bunch of games on last-second field goals, batted-down conversions, and, against Wisconsin, two touchdowns including the game-winner wiped off the scoreboard by ridiculous referee decisions. Their three losses including the Outback Bowl were complete and utter eviscerations, where the offense was so lovely that they wiped the defense out and couldn't score. They also lost three key defensive players from last year's dominant unit. What does Fitzgerald have in store for the 'Cats this year?  KEY PLAYERS: Justin Jackson THE BALL CARRIER: Last year, rushed for 1,418 years and basically is the Northwestern offense. Fourth in the nation in carries. Jackson is not particularly fast and is not the biggest guy, but he is really good at finding the hole and steadily getting down the field. Anthony Walker: One of the best linebackers in the Big Ten, criminally underrated because he plays for Northwestern.  Clayton Thorson: Fitz likes to say Thorson led the 'Cats to 10 wins as a true freshman, but he was more like on the field for ten wins. Big guy whose weird giraffe runs are surprisingly effective, is not very good at passing the ball. It doesn't help that Northwestern's receivers are so bad that this year's corps includes converted DBs and former RB Solomon Vault, but if Northwestern is going to be decent, he needs to make a big leap this year. SCHEDULE Western Michigan: Row this, W Illinois State: ISU is a really good 1AA team, so this game could kill me W Duke: gently caress Duke, please W Nebraska: Technically a home game, but there will be 800,000 Nebraska fans here. L at Iowa: Iowa murdered them last year. It will be closer. L at Michigan State: L Indiana: This is the scariest game on the schedule because I don't know if Northwestern can outscore them. W at Ohio State:  LWisconsin: Do you know Wisconsin hasn't won at Ryan Field SINCE 1999? L at Purdue: W please at Minnesota: Northwestern annihilated them last year. W Illinois: HAT HAT HAT HAT HAT W My optimistic prediction has seven wins, but really Duke, Indiana, and Minnesota are all toss-ups and this team can very well win five games. My hope is for Northwestern to go bowling again, but I don't expect them to be a factor in the West unless Thorson improves significantly.
|
#
¿
Jul 31, 2016 16:24
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ Apr 28, 2024 01:20 |
|
|
|
|
#
¿
Aug 23, 2016 03:17
|
|