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Green Hill Friendzone
Oct 27, 2013

A bird turd landed on my shoulder between classes once.

The emo kids gave me a sprite that had been laced with laxatives.

There was a broken soda machine that would eat your dollar then plop out two sodas on the next dollar. Only I knew this.

Top THAT, GBS!

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Last Chance
Dec 31, 2004

my friend brought a bag of weed to school and therefore became the king of cool

Knyteguy
Jul 6, 2005

YES to love
NO to shirts


Toilet Rascal

handshake posted:

A bird turd landed on my shoulder between classes once.

Same but on my head and on recess. Our school got a notice from the city dumb that the garbage around was stealing all the seagulls from the dump.

Enfield
May 30, 2011

by Nyc_Tattoo
i thrrew a kid on a rock and knocked his tooth out during a football game once

The Walrus
Jul 9, 2002

by Fluffdaddy
one teacher had a flask of buckleys cough syrup he sipped from on the reg, was weird

kalel
Jun 19, 2012

my eighth grade spanish teacher had amazing tits which I would stare at todos los dias

GRILLARY CLINTON
Mar 5, 2016

I know the devil is real.
I know the devil is real.
one time i got aids in middle school from the lunch lady

rgocs
Nov 9, 2011
A kid in class was being annoying and the teacher told him to stand in the corner at the front and shut up. He pissed his pants in front of everyone halfway through class. Apparently he reasoned if he couldn't talk he couldn't ask for permission to go to the toilet either.

Dr. Killjoy
Oct 9, 2012

:thunk::mason::brainworms::tinfoil::thunkher:

rgocs posted:

A kid in class was being annoying and the teacher told him to stand in the corner at the front and shut up. He pissed his pants in front of everyone halfway through class. Apparently he reasoned if he couldn't talk he couldn't ask for permission to go to the toilet either.

losing his right to free speech smh
#freepisskid

rgocs
Nov 9, 2011

Dr. Killjoy posted:

losing his right to free speech smh
#freepisskid

Dude was sadly a target for bullies already, imagine how much that helped him...

Roydrowsy
May 6, 2007

Someone wrote in my 7th yearbook "stay gay. Just kidding, be straight".

That pretty much sums up middle school for me.

kalel
Jun 19, 2012

I also remember a girl would talk me up every now and then but I was too :downs: to care

oh chelsea, what could have been. sigh

a peck of pickled peckers
Aug 3, 2014

I am your Redeemer! It is by my hand that you arise from the ashes of this world!

Roydrowsy posted:

Someone wrote in my 7th yearbook "stay gay. Just kidding, be straight".

That pretty much sums up middle school for me.

So? Where do you stand today?

Gaunab
Feb 13, 2012
LUFTHANSA YOU FUCKING DICKWEASEL
Some kid got bullied so hard he fainted or something. Next day we had a talk about bullying; felt like i was in a very special episode or something.


A kid in my algebra class died from playing the choking game. It ended being on the news. I suspect he really died of auto-erotic asphyxiation but they told us choking game to be respectful to his family.

resting mitch face
Apr 9, 2005

5) I hear you.
I got put in an adolescent psych ward for a few months when I was in jr high (it wasn't called middle school then).

When I got out, I was much worse.

Later, when I was 17 and going to NA meetings, I ran into the dickhole psychiatrist (also attending NA meeting) who initially convinced my parents I needed to stay in the psych ward. Ha ha you stupid junkie gently caress.

I'm all good now.

HD DAD
Jan 13, 2010

Generic white guy.

Toilet Rascal
I was a fat kid that pissed my pants in 6th grade gym. It was pretty awesome

Khazar-khum
Oct 22, 2008

:minnie: Cat Army :minnie:
2nd Battalion
On the last day of school, everyone cleaned out their lockers.

My friends and I fished out tons of unused notebooks, headphones, all kinds of great stuff. I finally used up the last of the notebooks in grad school.

criscodisco
Feb 18, 2004

do it
I lost my virginity in the 8th grade. The guy was 36 and I look back on it and think "well that was sort of weird" but at the time it seemed pretty awesome. Unfortunately since it was with another dude I couldn't brag to all my friends.

Nigmaetcetera
Nov 17, 2004

borkborkborkmorkmorkmork-gabbalooins
One time in middle school I was homeschooled until I was 15 and I totally pwnd the teacher and all the other stude nts

Testikles
Feb 22, 2009

SciFiDownBeat posted:

my eighth grade spanish teacher had amazing tits which I would stare at todos los dias

Best story of the thread.

a hole-y ghost
May 10, 2010

criscodisco posted:

Unfortunately since it was with another dude I couldn't brag to all my friends.
Why not??

Testikles
Feb 22, 2009

Roydrowsy posted:

Someone wrote in my 7th yearbook "stay gay. Just kidding, be straight".

That pretty much sums up middle school for me.

Zorodius
Feb 11, 2007

EA GAMES' MASTERPIECE 'MADDEN 2018 G.O.A.T. EDITION' IS A GLORIOUS TRIUMPH OF ART AND TECHNOLOGY. IT BRINGS GAMEDAY RIGHT TO THE PLAYER AND WHOEVER SAYS OTHERWISE CAN, YOU GUESSED IT...
SUCK THE SHIT STRAIGHT OUT OF MY OWN ASSHOLE.

BUY IT.

criscodisco posted:

I lost my virginity in the 8th grade. The guy was 36 and I look back on it and think "well that was sort of weird" but at the time it seemed pretty awesome. Unfortunately since it was with another dude I couldn't brag to all my friends.

congrats though

Roydrowsy
May 6, 2007

TheNightmanCum-eth posted:

So? Where do you stand today?

Well, I wasn't gay.
I'm not now either.

Middle school kids are assholes

Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost
I got picked on alot

CannedMacabre
Jul 6, 2007

In space, no one
can hear you fart.
I had a mullet in middle school.









VVV: Whoa! That's the kind of lovely thing that ends up giving you ball cancer later in life. Karma gonna get ya!

CannedMacabre fucked around with this message at 00:40 on Jul 23, 2016

Chi Tsumi
Jul 22, 2016
I found around two hundred dollars in the library desk drawer. Was for some school trip. Me and a friend talk about it a bit and I end up grabbing it. Some sixth grader kept bothering us, so I told the chess teacher that the kid was over there annoying us and going through drawers and such, so he makes him leave us alone.

Next day my friend gets questioned because he was known for being a troublemaker. I had told him to tell anyone who asks that that sixth grader was loving around over there. We even had the chess teacher to back us up on this. Sixth grader gets expelled, I buy some video games and throw my friend some money.

rgocs
Nov 9, 2011

Mumpy Puffinz posted:

I got picked on alot

I sort of was too in 6th grade, but I once let one of the big guys in class copy from my exam and the next time someone tried to pick on me, he stepped in and that was the last time I got picked on.

Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost

CannedMacabre posted:

I had a mullet in middle school.

I was 10 when achey breaky heart came out. No one had a mullet after wards. Must have been a southern thing

CannedMacabre
Jul 6, 2007

In space, no one
can hear you fart.

Mumpy Puffinz posted:

I was 10 when achey breaky heart came out. No one had a mullet after wards. Must have been a southern thing

I had a mullet from like 86-90. Long before Billy Ray Cyrus dealt the death blow.



EDIT: math

Mr. Meagles
Apr 30, 2004

Out here, everything hurts


i told people i had a car even though i was 14. everyone thought i was cool because I had one but i just printed a picture of a car off the internet.

teenagers are dumb as hell

Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost

CannedMacabre posted:

I had a mullet from like 86-92. Long before Billy Ray Cyrus dealt the death blow.

I did have a rattail for about six months when I was 6. The '80's had awful hair cuts for men

Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost

Tom Gorman posted:

teenagers are dumb as hell

this will always be true

CannedMacabre
Jul 6, 2007

In space, no one
can hear you fart.
At one point I had spikey mullet ala Keifer Sutherland in Lost Boys. Fun times.

Riot Bimbo
Dec 28, 2006


i had a 7th grader shouting at me confessing her undying love for me as i walked home in the 8th grade. The next day a disabled/special needs kids just dropped his pants and poo poo in front of like 50 phys ed students. The two are probably related.

criscodisco
Feb 18, 2004

do it

Tiny Indiana farming town in the early 90's.

Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost

CannedMacabre posted:

At one point I had spikey mullet ala Keifer Sutherland in Lost Boys. Fun times.

my friend on the bus tried to keep his mohawk with an elmers glue stick

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless

handshake posted:

A bird turd landed on my shoulder between classes once.

The emo kids gave me a sprite that had been laced with laxatives.

There was a broken soda machine that would eat your dollar then plop out two sodas on the next dollar. Only I knew this.

Top THAT, GBS!

Trevor?!

Hrist
Feb 21, 2011


Lipstick Apathy
At another school, one kid poo poo his pants while playing baseball at the school. On 3 different occasions. I think he was in 8th grade at the time.

At my own school, one time someone threw this guy's shoes out the window of the second floor, and a homeless guy casually took them and had himself some new adolescent sized shoes.

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Dave_Indeed
Feb 22, 2004

by FactsAreUseless
I butt hosed an elementary school teacher years ago. She had venus dimples, fat tits and a soft butt. We're still friends on facebook.

The End.

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