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Took a poo poo in a tuba in band. Boy was the teacher pissed. Never found out who it was, so the elusive Tuba-shitter is still at large.
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Jul 24, 2016 04:51
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Computers were not an issue at my middle school. Nobody at my school had ever used one (not even the teachers/admin) when I was in 7th grade. In 8th, I was the only person who had used a computer, because my dad and I built it. I guess that confirms my nerd status. During my 8th grade year, one kid would steal any padlock that was not locked. Then he would keep it in a box in his bedroom. Toward the end of the school year he used them, along with lengths of chain, to hook together most of the bikes in the bike rack. The janitor was not happy that afternoon. We had one weird kid who really into the Tolkien books. He asked that we call him Legolas. I hung around him because his sister (who was a 9th grader) was insanely hot, at least in my 8th grade mind. In PE, climbing the ropes was a prerequisite for lots of other stuff. You had to climb up to the red line (like 25 feet up) hands only to pass the rope test. Then you got to do the higher-level stuff. One kid managed to smear some really smelly/slippery material about 4 or 5 feet below the red line, just to gently caress with people.
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Jul 24, 2016 05:22
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Methanar posted:The cute girl beside me's was either 12-6-20 or 20-12-6. Look I know it goes against the tenor of GBS but it's creepy that you still remember her measurements.
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Jul 24, 2016 07:53
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my school had a kid who, at lunch, brought a bag of oregano and told everyone it was weed. he then proceeded to roll a 'joint' out of like lined notebook paper and try to smoke it in front of a small crowd of onlookers. then he barfed, then he started crying and ran away and got suspended. this same school also had American History X style neo nazi kids who used to huck batteries at the mexican kids.
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Jul 24, 2016 10:28
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There was a kid who hated me, and I mean hated me. One day I was leaning on the brick wall outside the library, reading. I saw some movement and ducked just before he slugged me. He smashed his fist into the brick wall. I helped him get to the office while all his buddies laughed. We were pretty good friends after that.
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Jul 24, 2016 10:41
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In 9th grade a kid in my class skipped a class to buy weed and then he walked over to the pool while smokin a phatty and when he got to the locker room to change he just wrapped the roach in his shirt and put it in his locker without checking to make sure it was out and big surprise it caught fire and we all had to hang around outside in our bathing suits while the fire department investigated and the kid got expelled and the locker room smelled like burnt weed for the better part of a year golden times those were
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Jul 24, 2016 10:49
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I'm not even going to talk about the embarrassing or traumatic stuff, but I recall one day in science class in 8th grade, i sat behind and to the right of this girl I liked. And on this particular day she had this short skirt, and she also slipped off her shoes and she had these tremendously sexy feet (and I'm not even into feet normally) but anyway I got so hard I ruptured the zipper on my too-tight jeans. I untucked my shirt to cover it up, I don't think anyone noticed.
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Jul 24, 2016 11:27
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Number_6 posted:I'm not even going to talk about the embarrassing or traumatic stuff, but I recall one day in science class in 8th grade, i sat behind and to the right of this girl I liked. And on this particular day she had this short skirt, and she also slipped off her shoes and she had these tremendously sexy feet (and I'm not even into feet normally) but anyway I got so hard I ruptured the zipper on my too-tight jeans. I untucked my shirt to cover it up, I don't think anyone noticed. In 7th grade English I sat next to a kid who loved to get a boner and then show me his wagging boner in his pants. In retrospect he was probably gay
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Jul 24, 2016 12:22
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You just brought back two repressed memories. In year 6 I was at a friends house and he showed me his mum's back massager, went off for a few minutes and came back to show me the jizz and he was really proud about it. In year 7 I had a friend that would call up brothels from the backpages and start jerking off under his shorts while he spoke to them and I was in the room. I don't think either of them were gay - just really hosed in the head.
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Jul 24, 2016 12:27
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Number_6 posted:I'm not even going to talk about the embarrassing or traumatic stuff, but I recall one day in science class in 8th grade, i sat behind and to the right of this girl I liked. And on this particular day she had this short skirt, and she also slipped off her shoes and she had these tremendously sexy feet (and I'm not even into feet normally) but anyway I got so hard I ruptured the zipper on my too-tight jeans. I untucked my shirt to cover it up, I don't think anyone noticed. once in 7th or 8th grade history the teacher had the class sit in a circular fashion as we each presented some book report or something. there was an outer circle of kids sitting in desks (which had been rearranged into a circle) and an inner circle of kids sitting cross-legged in front of the desks. I happened to sit in front of a crush of mine. she started absent-mindedly twitching her feet in such a way that they brushed up against my back, I got extremely turned on but I had to keep a straight face since half the class was facing my direction I imagine that's a similar feeling to being high at a job interview
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Jul 24, 2016 19:59
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Methanar posted:16-6-36 mine was 36-24-36  still is
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Jul 24, 2016 20:09
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We would take fruit off the cafeteria lunch line and play stick ball with it. But if it was raining we'd go in the library and sarcastically askthe kids playing dnd if they could teach us some stuff about fairies and Satan. My locker number was 210 and the combo was 24 38 6 Booblord Zagats fucked around with this message at 20:18 on Jul 24, 2016 |
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Jul 24, 2016 20:16
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criscodisco posted:36-18-27. your locker combination was hot
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Jul 24, 2016 20:18
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one time after football practice the assistant coach horsed around with me in the showers and when I told the head coach he didnt do anything about it because he was more concerned with the season 
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Jul 24, 2016 20:19
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Nooner posted:one time after football practice the assistant coach horsed around with me in the showers and when I told the head coach he didnt do anything about it because he was more concerned with the season did you go to penn state?
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Jul 24, 2016 20:22
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Nooner posted:one time after football practice the assistant coach horsed around with me in the showers and when I told the head coach he didnt do anything about it because he was more concerned with the season Well, don't leave us hanging - how did the season go?
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Jul 24, 2016 20:24
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Last day of school, 9th grade, I tossed an almost full bottle of glue onto the street where the buses picked kids up. When a bus ran over it, it was basically a glue bomb and nailed at least 5 people, including my friend. No one ever suspected it was me.
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Jul 24, 2016 20:26
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GOD IS BED posted:Last day of school, 9th grade, I tossed an almost full bottle of glue onto the street where the buses picked kids up. When a bus ran over it, it was basically a glue bomb and nailed at least 5 people, including my friend. No one ever suspected it was me. nice story that didn't really happen.
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Jul 24, 2016 20:28
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Nooner posted:When I was in 7th grade there was this nerdy af kid in my pe class and one day one of the jocks was making fun of him a tom and like calling him a fag and stuff and talking about loving his mom and the needy kid just kept responding by saying "well you're just a pompous old windbag!" and it was pretty lol to the point that I still remember it like 15 years later He sounds like a pompous old windbag.
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Jul 24, 2016 20:32
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One kid much bigger than myself kept picking on me so I poured a can of soft drink on his pants. He was furious and beat me up, and I ended up in hospital with a broken rib. He was expelled afterwards and I never saw him again.
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Jul 24, 2016 20:33
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When the first pokemon games came out, they were crazy popular and a ton of people would have pokemon battles at my school. There were two types of matches. The first one was your standard set where everyone fought for fun. The second was "playing for keeps" where the winner could choose any pokemon the loser used and keep it. Naturally these were pretty rare and people tended to stick to using a B team that they didn't mind losing. So an all out hardcore match with the best pokemon on the line was a pretty big deal. Now there were these two kids that hated each other. Brad was the local "rich kid" and kind of an rear end in a top hat, while Kyle was your more traditional nerd that was nice enough but kind of annoying since he took the games a little too seriously. To make a long story short they have this big hyped up match with their best pokemon. Everyone watched Brad completely crush Kyle. It turned out that Brad had 2 gameboys, both versions of the game and was using a team of multiple Mewtwo's (the most powerful pokemon in the game and impossible to get more than one except by trading). Kyle is pissed but goes through with the trade and gives away his high level charazard. In pokemon you can't just give a free trade. Both players have to give a pokemon. In exchange for Kyle's favorite pokemon, Brad gave him a low level rattata. The real kicker though was that he took the time to give it the nickname "KyleSux." Kyle takes this really badly and freaks out. He starts screaming and swearing at Brad and rips the cord out of the gameboy, but the trade has already been made and he ends up storming out while we all laugh at his outburst. Kyle just stops playing pokemon with people after that. We figured that was the end of it until he pops up like a month later and challenges Brad to a rematch. Everyone gathers around in anticipation of another giant freak out, but Kyle isn't going down easy this time. Turns out he basically spent a month building a team that was engineered to defeat Brad. Not just beat him but annoy him. We all tended to just choose the hardest hitting moves we could get, but Kyle had a team of insect types that were resistant to psychic damage and specialized in making their opponents slow down, miss more, fall asleep etc. It was hilarious to watch. Brad would send out a psychic death machine and Kyle would send out a caterpillar. Then we'd all laugh as he missed 50% of the time while getting his health chipped away. Brad wasn't losing by much but as the battle dragged on he was clearly getting more and more annoyed at every missed attack and lost turn. Finally Brad was down to his last pokemon, a badly wounded Mewtwo that was out of it's most powerful attacks. Brad managed to score a hit and force Kyle to use his last pokemon, a level 99 Raticate named "KyleSux." KyleSux finished the fight in one hit and I've never seen anyone look more smug than Kyle when he did it.
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Jul 24, 2016 20:33
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that was a very fun story 
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Jul 24, 2016 20:49
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Beef Turret posted:When the first pokemon games came out, they were crazy popular and a ton of people would have pokemon battles at my school. There were two types of matches. The first one was your standard set where everyone fought for fun. lmao at teh loving "r" word that took charmander instead of squirtle hhahahahahahaha gently caress 
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Jul 24, 2016 20:55
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Everyone who didn't take bulbasaur was dumb
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Jul 24, 2016 20:57
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Who the gently caress had time for middle school?! LOL @ slackers ITT.
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Jul 24, 2016 20:58
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Methanar posted:Everyone who didn't take bulbasaur was dumb holy gently caress bulbasaur was so whack it didnt even get its own gameboy game there is no pokemon GREEN JFC what is going through your brain????
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Jul 24, 2016 20:59
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cnut posted:Who the gently caress had time for middle school?! LOL @ slackers ITT. I seriously thought your name was oval office. Didn't know how to insult you
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Jul 24, 2016 21:01
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Went to a K-8 school so finding kids to pick on with your crew was easy. Mostly would just find someone and "rack them". (That's when everyone grabs a limb and holds the person all splayed out a foot above the grass, then drop them). One time in a heat of passion one of the crew chucklefucks picked up a kid, turned him upside down, and pile drove him into the ground. We all had a collective mini heart attack as we saw the kid's head go horizontal upon hitting the ground. He got up and shook it off. Said he was okay. We all just kinda stopped doing that stuff after that.
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Jul 24, 2016 21:05
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Mumpy Puffinz posted:I seriously thought your name was oval office. Muhahahaha 
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Jul 24, 2016 21:13
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On the last day of the 8th grade, a kid made a huge mess in the cafeteria, he and his friends told the janitor i did it, and i was stuck cleaning it up. As I walked out i asked the btich of a janitor if she got her rocks off making kids clean up other peoples messes and she threatened to give me detention and i just reminded her it was May 25th and she could suck my balls. When I got back to the keyboarding class that was split by my lunch, I found the kid, who was like two head sizes taller than me, but I was pretty fit, and I bitch slapped him so hard the force of the hit knocked him down, I sat down at my computer, and started my work. He talked mad poo poo all day. The day ends without further incident, except i'm really mad. Summer happens, and on the first day of highschool, he's LOOKING for me, he finds me, and basically gets on his knees and gives me a sloppy apology blowjob and basically begs me to bury the hatchet, so i shake his hand and accept while threatening worse violence if he ever pulls some loving stunt like that again. So i made him look like a bitch in front of our peers and established my dominance, like I was in prison, which was fitting because that school district treated the students like prisoners.
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Jul 24, 2016 21:21
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A kid had a note to leave class early because he had a doctor's appointment. When the teacher told him to wait until the end of the period he threw his chair at him. The guys in the year below me forced another kid into a closet, barred the doors with a hockey stick, and sprayed three full cans of Lynx through a hole in the top. He had to be hospitalised and never came back. People used to piss in each other's PE uniform bags so they'd either have to show up in piss-sodden clothes or get detention for not having the correct gear. Someone took a poo poo on a plate and put it in the house fridge and then we didn't have a fridge anymore.
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Jul 24, 2016 21:30
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Nooner posted:holy gently caress bulbasaur was so whack it didnt even get its own gameboy game there is no pokemon GREEN JFC what is going through your brain???? um yes it did 
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Jul 24, 2016 21:40
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elementary school: i was on the back of the bus and we were going down a hill just before reaching the school. I vomited all over the floor and it slid down, hitting the feet of everybody in the row. bus parked and my friend and i bolted before anyone could figure out what happened high school: for some inexplicable reason we had a big riot that broke out over the whole campus during lunch (outdoor school, so everyone was scattered all over the place). dudes getting into fights left and right, everyone throwing poo poo. someone set fire to a tree and my friend got clocked in the head with an apple. the school stopped selling/banned glass bottles after that incident. it was rad
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Jul 24, 2016 21:54
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hemophilia posted:On the last day of the 8th grade, a kid made a huge mess in the cafeteria, he and his friends told the janitor i did it, and i was stuck cleaning it up. As I walked out i asked the btich of a janitor if she got her rocks off making kids clean up other peoples messes and she threatened to give me detention and i just reminded her it was May 25th and she could suck my balls. *janitrix
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Jul 24, 2016 22:10
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criscodisco posted:36-18-27. Ha! only if she 5'3".
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Jul 24, 2016 22:35
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CannedMacabre posted:Ha! only if she 5'3".
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Jul 24, 2016 22:56
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There was a kid in middle school whose parents were rumored to have been 70 when they had him. What made it worse was he had to wear adult diapers for some reason and everyone used to suspect that he was gay. One day someone caut him watching gay porn in computer class so at lunch that day everyone was picking on him. One of the kids who liked to bullie people cornered him in the cafeteria and started threatening him with a few others but I have mad respect for that weird little gay kid because he just grabbed the bullie and gave him a sloppy French kiss and ran off bugs bunny style. After that day he came out and wouldn't stop peaking through the cracks in the bathroom stalls.
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Jul 24, 2016 23:15
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In eighth grade english, my teacher would sit on the desk and initially sit all "ladylike" but within ten or so minutes would get comfortable in a position that let us stare straight up her skirt. I'm not sure if she knew or not. Part of me thinks she had to know because there's no way that many people were looking up her skirt without her noticing. My friend gave me ten bucks one day to switch seats with him so he could see but he didn't even sit down before she told us to switch back to our assigned seats. My best friend's mom taught the computer class and my hot friend next to me would constantly touch me because she thought it was funny that the teacher would yell at me. She'd lean over me to grab something and get her breasts on my face, pretend to pick something up so her head was against my dick, grab my hand and put it on her upper thigh, etc. "DOG BUTTZ. GET YOUR HANDS ON THE KEYBOARD AND YOUR EYES ON THE SCREEN." This is a true story and it was goddamn awesome.
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Jul 24, 2016 23:46
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dog buttz posted:In eighth grade english, my teacher would sit on the desk and initially sit all "ladylike" but within ten or so minutes would get comfortable in a position that let us stare straight up her skirt. I'm not sure if she knew or not. Part of me thinks she had to know because there's no way that many people were looking up her skirt without her noticing. My friend gave me ten bucks one day to switch seats with him so he could see but he didn't even sit down before she told us to switch back to our assigned seats. Was she hot?
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Jul 25, 2016 00:11
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Methanar posted:Everyone who didn't take bulbasaur was dumb Who did pick Bulbasaur? Literally everyone picked Squirtle. Everyone! Unless you were the one kid on the bus that picked Charmander. Also when pokemon came out I was one of the entire 3 kids in my k-8 school that played it for the first year or so. It was weird.
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Jul 25, 2016 00:57
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