EPIC Middle school stories

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Nazzadan: Jun 22, 2016

The crappy IBM Thinkpad my mom purchased through the school for like $2k got stolen in 8th grade.

Months later, I got called into the principal's office and they asked if a laptop on the desk was mine, the neato stickers I put on it were gone and the OS was wiped so it had no identifying features so I said probably not. When I set it back on the Principal's desk, the ODD popped open and WC3: The Frozen Throne was in the drive so I knew it was mine. Some minority kid was running around stealing laptops and bringing them back to his dad who was selling them on the side, and they tracked them down somehow.

Basically, Blizzard saved my lovely old IBM Thinkpad.

# ? Jul 26, 2016 18:23

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# ? Apr 25, 2024 11:30

Nazzadan: Jun 22, 2016

Oh, the Principal chewed me out afterwords for playing videogames on my school laptop.

# ? Jul 26, 2016 18:25

3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

drat those minorities. Maybe go to a white school next time you're a kid.

# ? Jul 26, 2016 18:39

SIDS Vicious: Jan 1, 1970

Jerry Cotton posted:

drat those minorities. Maybe go to a white school next time you're a kid.

i did this and I got bullied a lot even as another white kid so ymmv

# ? Jul 26, 2016 18:53

3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

Celluloid Sam posted:

i did this and I got bullied a lot even as another white kid so ymmv

Yeah but did your IBM computer get stolen?

# ? Jul 26, 2016 19:21

SIDS Vicious: Jan 1, 1970

Jerry Cotton posted:

Yeah but did your IBM computer get stolen?

no I had a commodore 64 until 1999

# ? Jul 26, 2016 19:22

Cnut the Great: Mar 30, 2014

Beef Turret posted:

When the first pokemon games came out, they were crazy popular and a ton of people would have pokemon battles at my school. There were two types of matches. The first one was your standard set where everyone fought for fun.

The second was "playing for keeps" where the winner could choose any pokemon the loser used and keep it. Naturally these were pretty rare and people tended to stick to using a B team that they didn't mind losing. So an all out hardcore match with the best pokemon on the line was a pretty big deal.

Now there were these two kids that hated each other. Brad was the local "rich kid" and kind of an rear end in a top hat, while Kyle was your more traditional nerd that was nice enough but kind of annoying since he took the games a little too seriously.

To make a long story short they have this big hyped up match with their best pokemon. Everyone watched Brad completely crush Kyle. It turned out that Brad had 2 gameboys, both versions of the game and was using a team of multiple Mewtwo's (the most powerful pokemon in the game and impossible to get more than one except by trading).

Kyle is pissed but goes through with the trade and gives away his high level charazard. In pokemon you can't just give a free trade. Both players have to give a pokemon. In exchange for Kyle's favorite pokemon, Brad gave him a low level rattata. The real kicker though was that he took the time to give it the nickname "KyleSux."

Kyle takes this really badly and freaks out. He starts screaming and swearing at Brad and rips the cord out of the gameboy, but the trade has already been made and he ends up storming out while we all laugh at his outburst. Kyle just stops playing pokemon with people after that. We figured that was the end of it until he pops up like a month later and challenges Brad to a rematch.

Everyone gathers around in anticipation of another giant freak out, but Kyle isn't going down easy this time. Turns out he basically spent a month building a team that was engineered to defeat Brad. Not just beat him but annoy him. We all tended to just choose the hardest hitting moves we could get, but Kyle had a team of insect types that were resistant to psychic damage and specialized in making their opponents slow down, miss more, fall asleep etc.

It was hilarious to watch. Brad would send out a psychic death machine and Kyle would send out a caterpillar. Then we'd all laugh as he missed 50% of the time while getting his health chipped away. Brad wasn't losing by much but as the battle dragged on he was clearly getting more and more annoyed at every missed attack and lost turn. Finally Brad was down to his last pokemon, a badly wounded Mewtwo that was out of it's most powerful attacks. Brad managed to score a hit and force Kyle to use his last pokemon, a level 99 Raticate named "KyleSux."

KyleSux finished the fight in one hit and I've never seen anyone look more smug than Kyle when he did it.

I can't believe this big wall o' text about a middle school Pokemon grudge match was actually a good and funny post.

# ? Jul 26, 2016 23:44

SIDS Vicious: Jan 1, 1970

Cnut the Great posted:

I can't believe this big wall o' text about a middle school Pokemon grudge match was actually a good and funny post.

its old

# ? Jul 26, 2016 23:47

Cnut the Great: Mar 30, 2014

Celluloid Sam posted:

its old

figures.

# ? Jul 27, 2016 01:02

The_end: May 17, 2014

In 8th grade my friend and i stole the English teachers book with all the answers in it. She knew it was us but could not prove it.

In 7th grade i rediscovered the joy of throwing wet handfuls of toilet paper onto the ceiling.

In 6th grade one of the really popular girls threw up spaghetti all over the floor. We got to run around outside while the janitor cleaned it up.

# ? Jul 27, 2016 01:18

rgocs: Nov 9, 2011

Bullying. After college I was at a party and one of the bullies from junior high was there. He recognized me and we started talking, he was quite drunk and broke down crying because apparently the guy he used to bully had jumped off a building a couple of years after leaving high-school.

rgocs fucked around with this message at 02:25 on Jul 27, 2016

# ? Jul 27, 2016 01:50

SurfaceDetail: Feb 17, 2016; by Cowcaster

Hrist posted:

Actually, a level 10 Charmander works just fine in the first gym. They don't even have rock moves to use on him anyway, and the move he gets after the tutorial fight works better on them than any wild pokemon, and ignored the defense curl spam. People picked Squritle because Blastoise is bitchin'

There's my epic middle school knowledge paying off in the internet comedy forums of today.

Real pro strat was leveling a caterpie to level 10 for Butterfree's confusion move.

Lazy noobs caught the level 7 metapod but they aren't as strong as pokemon you level and evolve yourself.

# ? Jul 27, 2016 02:19

Caesar Saladin: Aug 15, 2004

"I've just gotta touch some boobs, goddamn will one of these girls in this school just let me touch her boobs, it is my reason for living" - fonzarelli in middle school, loving boobs

# ? Jul 27, 2016 02:41

SurfaceDetail: Feb 17, 2016; by Cowcaster

same except every Saturday night

# ? Jul 27, 2016 02:41

canyoneer: Sep 13, 2005; I only have canyoneyes for you

SurfaceDetail posted:

same except every Saturday night

Stay away from the middle schools dude

# ? Jul 27, 2016 02:46

SurfaceDetail: Feb 17, 2016; by Cowcaster

theres no school on saturdays

# ? Jul 27, 2016 02:59

Whatev: Jan 19, 2007; unfading

rgocs posted:

Bullying. After college I was at a party and one of the bullies from junior high was there. He recognized me and we started talking, he was quite drunk and broke down crying because apparently the guy he used to bully had jumped off a building a couple of years after leaving high-school.

Then you called him a crybaby homo and punched him in the stomach

# ? Jul 27, 2016 03:45

Code Jockey: Jan 24, 2006; 69420 basic bytes free

Celluloid Sam posted:

no I had a commodore 64 until 1999

my dude

Fonzarelli posted:

"I've just gotta touch some boobs, goddamn will one of these girls in this school just let me touch her boobs, it is my reason for living" - fonzarelli in middle school, loving boobs

this except asses also more crying

# ? Jul 27, 2016 05:41

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# ? Apr 25, 2024 11:30

Mr. 47: Jul 8, 2008; Well, I guess I'll just go fuck myself, then.

In sixth grade, I was walking from the teachers desk to my desk at the front of the room. I farted really loudly, and everyone looked at me. To my right was a heavy-set kid named Matt. Matt was a solid guy, and a good friend, but I threw him right under the bus. I shouted, " Matt! JESUS!" And kept walking. He got teased for that well into high school.

# ? Aug 7, 2016 03:55

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