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Luvcow

One day nearer spring
car dealership where the salespeople are also strippers that grind on the customers as they try to look at the cars, drape their naked bodies over the cars to hide the dents and scrapes and give lap dances to customers while they try to read through and sign the papers

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FutonForensic

door-to-door car dealership. a salesman parks a car in front of your door until you buy it


Pot Smoke Phoenix



Smoke 'em if you gottem!
Church of Christ and Cars

Choir: He's got the whole world, in His car...

https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4
Sig elements by Manifisto and Heather Papps
Sig File protected by SigLock. do NOT steal this sig!

Chill la Chill

Don't lose your gay


Friendly local car dealership sells you cars in blind-buy boxes. 1:60 comes with a foil wrap. Most are lemons but 1:50000 gets you a lamborghini.

Apparently I'm #1 Kotori fan


thank you matoi and vanisher for the sigs, lovely dad for the cool av

google THIS

symbolic posted:

a drive-through car dealership, where you don't even have to get out of your car to get into another car

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN


I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.


"our new menu is a-la-car"

Pot Smoke Phoenix



Smoke 'em if you gottem!
Car-pay Diem

https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4
Sig elements by Manifisto and Heather Papps
Sig File protected by SigLock. do NOT steal this sig!

Schrecken

Child of Woe
A used car dealership that only sells refurbished cars involved in fatal accidents. Each car purchase comes with a copy of the coroner report.

wearing a lampshade

A normal car dealership with local TV ads, an overbearing local flavour type owner with a 10 gallon hat and catchphrase like "u love cars?! Then you will love THESE cars!!" except their cars are just go karts under miniature shells of real cars.

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN


I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.


No, no, it's a small portion dealership. Jim got the dip stick(his favorite) and I was feeling adventurous so I tried the negative side wiring harness. We've been going there for so long that I don't think that I could even drive an entire car nowadays.

google THIS

A tan, wrinkled, but kind-faced farmer scoops up a double handful of rich soil and lets it slowly run through his fingers

"here at chrysler, we know that growing a good car takes time..."

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN


I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.


Cars just like mom used to make. But only because she lost her entire 401k in 2008 and still has to work at the plant even though she should be retired by now.

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN


I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.


We slow-assemble our cars in a wood fired brick oven because we hate our employees

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN


I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.


Don't try the habenero fire Pinto, trust me.

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN


I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.


Seriously, the guy started making cars in his mom's garage and now he's a billionaire

super mario batali

Dice-a the Mushroom
Car -ls junior


mags

I am a congenital optimist.
Our cars are free range. They are raised on wild grasses and never know the inside of a big corporation's warehouse. Yep, only the finest quality cars here. No GMCs.

paul_soccer12 posted:

everyone in the idf must die

(USER WAS PERMABANNED FOR THIS POST)
Barking Gecko

Mahoro says, "Naughty things are bad."

mister magpie posted:

Our cars are free range. They are raised on wild grasses and never know the inside of a big corporation's warehouse. Yep, only the finest quality cars here. No GMCs.

You'll note the oversize outdoor parking spaces, so each car has plenty of room to move around, open its doors, and raise the hood.*

*California Proposition .0002 compliant.

Macnult

car dealership with too many balloons directly across the street from the car dealership with too many flags.

pig slut lisa

irl is good


dine-in car dealership: walk up with your food, tell the roller-skating salesman what kind of car you want to buy, and he brings it to you. popular concept in the 50s, not too many of these left these days.

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN


I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.


Giant, inflated ape in front of dealership is actual giant ape

Darkman Fanpage

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN posted:

Giant, inflated ape in front of dealership is actual giant ape

he's throwing the cars im trying to sell!!!

kaschei

alnilam posted:

All the recent dealerships that went up in my area have simple one word names like "wheel"
That's a name I could get behind

mooses

chocolate mooses
the same thing as one of those game show booths where money blows around and you grab it, except bigger and with cars instead of money

Solecist
Human Derby. 100 people into an arena surrounded by cars.

They all start their engines while the massive crowd is screaming their lungs out cheering for the cars to hit the humans. Winners are the cardriver who killed most people and the last human to survive without injury (!) wins a car.

google THIS

an extremely fancy car dealership where the cars cost ten times as much but they only take up a third of the lane

google THIS

a giant bulk dealership where you have to pay for a membership and the cars come in packs of ten but it saves you money in the long run

Ahundredbux

The right to bear arms
IKEA cars

December Octopodes

Christmas is coming
the squid is getting fat!
a car-dealership that talks a little too much about how its chakras are aligned after a single yoga class. they won't sell Tesla as it's too main-stream, and a single row of Priuses sits there ironically.


joke_explainer


symbolic posted:

a drive-through car dealership, where you don't even have to get out of your car to get into another car

i'm picturing a bigger car just closes around you with robotic arms welding it in place and your car is hooked up to controls in the driver seat of the bigger car

joke_explainer


ultra-manly car dealership which bullies you and your 'wussy' car choices and can't stop talking about how big and strong they are

joke_explainer


GODSPEED JOHN GLENN posted:

We slow-assemble our cars in a wood fired brick oven because we hate our employees

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December Octopodes

Christmas is coming
the squid is getting fat!
a clown dealership, a single small building surrounded by hundreds of cars. the door opens and a dealer comes out, another and another. it's thirty minutes later and you find yourself pressed against a car as the dealer tells you about the great options. three days later and the clowns haven't stopped coming out, you've managed to take shelter in a station wagon and occasionally stick your head out to get more pie. the years have passed and you no longer remember what the sun looks like there's only honking


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