|
O where I work right now, we are in a brand new building. Somehow it escaped the planners minds to build vents/fans in the bathrooms, so about halfway through the day it is a poo poo-hotbox. The smell has nowhere to go so it just festers, I think the janitors air it out after we are gone. My coworkers also poo poo more than any humans I have ever seen, there is a constant stream of people going in and out to take a poo poo.
|
#
?
Aug 9, 2016 23:42
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 24, 2024 02:41 |
|
|
Nazzadan posted:My coworkers also poo poo more than any humans I have ever seen, there is a constant stream of people going in and out to take a poo poo. What's the sector? Engineers are made of poo poo and star track
|
|
#
?
Aug 9, 2016 23:47
|
|
|
Oscar Wild posted:What's the sector? Engineers are made of poo poo and star track educational tech support. They must live off of coffee and sugar free haribos
|
|
#
?
Aug 9, 2016 23:53
|
|
|
Nazzadan posted:O where I work right now, we are in a brand new building. Somehow it escaped the planners minds to build vents/fans in the bathrooms, so about halfway through the day it is a poo poo-hotbox. The smell has nowhere to go so it just festers, I think the janitors air it out after we are gone. My employer also despises the work force. Especially the 10 year veteran file clerk lady that's about 12 feet away from the funk factory.
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 00:17
|
|
|
One time when I was in middle school, my sister at I were at some fancy place that had a bunch of reception rooms and both decided to find the bathroom. As I was tinkling, suddenly there's is the loudest and longest fart I've ever heard in the next stall over. Seriously I am surprised it didn't blow the bottom of the toilet out. I thought it was my sister so I started laughing hysterically. I get out and start washing my hands but my sister was already at the sink obviously trying to keep the laughter in, but she has a mortified expression on her face. A moment later a toilet flushes and that's when I realized that we weren't in the bathroom alone. This giant planet sized and fancily dressed woman walks out of the middle stall and says in a shrill but not angry voice, "Oooo!! It's kind of cold in here!" right before she washes her hands. Once she left my sister laughed even more than I did because I had clearly laughed at this woman for farting. I was so embarrassed. Thank god she was not in the same reception hall as us.
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 01:24
|
|
|
Women's room is the worst (I asked our Janitor, he said the women are way nastier) We have a call center in our building and so we have a lot of massive fatasses. Around 3pm it seems to be the time when they all go and take their afternoon power dumps so it smells like sour poo poo and farts. Every stall either has a brown triangle rear end crack stamp on the back of the seat or the toilet is clogged so that it looks like a potted plant of poo poo and paper. I don't understand how your rear end can be that filthy that you stamp poo poo where you sit (also, every stall has a seat-cover dispenser, so they don't even use these). Also, they had to install a sharps disposal in the bathroom because someone was trying to flush their beetus needles in the toilet. Yesterday one of the toilets had a big dookie mark on the back of it. How the gently caress did it get there? Did the poop come out of your butt like a banana and then just mash up against the back of the toilet bowl? How does this even happen?!!!
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 01:42
|
|
|
When I worked at a canning/bottling facility for Red Gold during college the restrooms became gross and unusable as soon as the migrants show up. They refuse to flush lovely toilet paper because they don't believe in running water and instead throw it on the floor next to the toilet so that by the end of the shift there's a mountain of lovely toilet paper and the smell takes your breath away.
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 01:57
|
|
|
I have a co-worker that's morbidly obese. More than one occasion I'm just about to walk into the bathroom and I hear grunting/moaning from within. A. He usually clogs the toilet, despite the toilets being industrial quality. B. He leaves a dark impression on the toilet seat C. It smells like death for an hour afterwards. D. Goes through half a roll of toilet paper each time.
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 01:57
|
|
|
good thread op a couple months ago i went inside one of the single unisex bathrooms in the hall outside my office and found it trashed with paper towel dispenser broken, and a mini copy of gideons bible left on the sink...i opened up the bible to find a note written on the inside cover from what sounded like a little girl written to her granddad that mentioned the bible was a gift to him. i went from annoyed to amused to confused to weirded out then finally depressed in like 2-3min time
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 02:24
|
|
|
Millie posted:Women's room is the worst (I asked our Janitor, he said the women are way nastier) lmao
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 02:29
|
|
|
went into one of the stalls once and there was a solid mass of poo poo on the floor in front of the toilet, with nothing in or on the toilet. still trying to figure that out. also, during high school, i was wiping my rear end once when i heard something above me. i look up and there's some kid i don't know staring at me, hanging on to the side of the stall. as soon as i make eye contact he ran away laughing. i guess he was trying to startle me but i was just confused more than anything.
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 02:45
|
|
|
I've posted about it before but I used to work with a bunch of H1B indians and they would stand on the toilets and poo poo all over them like an explosive poo poo bomb. Theyd also piss in the overflow drains.
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 02:46
|
|
|
Millie posted:Women's room is the worst (I asked our Janitor, he said the women are way nastier) I can't explain any of this or how it happens nor have I ever seen this aside from the clogs with paper and worse. However... My one major complaint with the ladies room has entirely to do with periods. There was a bathroom at my university that had absolutely no ventilation and it was of course the only one for use by students in the entire 14 story building. It always absolutely reeked of stale blood and I avoided this particular bathroom at all costs because it was that nauseating. There also weren't any hooks on any of the stalls so most would just put their bookbags or purses on the floor which was always disgusting. I guess this happens from yanking a tampon out or something, but it's not uncommon to see blood on the walls inside of a stall. Yuck. Also most women apparently do not wrap up their pads and tampons before putting them in the little trash bins inside of stalls either, and the lids are usually kept wide open. 
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 02:54
|
|
|
His name was [redacted] although he preferred to be called VendaGoat. I was deeply in love with him. Upon seeing his portly 5 foot 2 inch frame glide through the glass paneled door of the cafe and waddle over to my counter I was enraptured by the swagger in his plodding gait. He opened his mouth to order a cheese and mayonnaise sandwich and all three of his rounded chins bounced back and forth and little drops of frothy saliva sprayed in small parabolic trajectories from underneath his rasping tongue and landed with a light patter on the display of cakes on the polished glass display. I eyed his ample face with a loving stare as his narrow drooping eyes found mine. VendaGoat was a homophobe. He never once called me by my real name, instead opting to use such adorable pet names as human being or queer. I let my hand brush his as I passed him his 56 pence change and he pulled back his arm sharply in the cute way that he does sometimes. As he searched for an empty table to sit at I thought I heard him whisper to himself 'ugh, the loving dick just touched me again' He dragged his lame, weight-strained ankles across the floor and flopped into a chair near the Pepsi Max machine and farted audibly but didn't seem to care, or maybe the sound was attenuated somewhat by my neon yellow cycling vest which lay mathematically perfectly flat beneath his behemoth form. A small dribble of piss presented itself to my field of view as a roughly vertical streak along the inner thigh of his cheap grey sweat pants which I noticed were wearing thin at the seams. When the sandwich was ready I carried it to VendaGoat's table and lay it carefully before him and I retreated hastily to my watch behind the counter; never once dropping my longing gaze from the object of my desire. I watched intently as he scoffed down the food I had prepared for him and left the cafe. I made an excuse to leave the serving area and quickly made for the office in the back room. I copied the last 10 minutes from the security camera hard drive onto my USB stick and proceeded straight for the toilets. I could not wait to get home. I had to release the sexual tension which was now at a critical level so I wanked my tiny penis with gusto. Tiny faps left the stall as I pounded at the pinkie sized erect cock grasped between my forefinger and thumb and I wailed loudly while thinking about VendaGoat's back fat. I could practically smell his stomach sweat trapped between folds of blubber as they might slide and slap moistly against one another. At length I came and I wiped my splooge against the lavatory wall and sat down naked on the toilet panting and crying. I blubbed my little gay heart out there on that piss stained toilet rim (for there was no seat) and little plops of poo fell from my quivering bum. Then I went back to work as if nothing happened. I wiped my fingers on a napkin and went back to making sandwiches.
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 07:58
|
|
|
we had bathrooms that we shared with other offices on the floor, but it was mostly our company. i started taking lysol/cleaner cans and putting them in the single stall bathroom so that people could clean/deodorize (im a germ freak ok). anyway, every couple of months, the nearly full can would disappear. this isn't a public/retail bathroom. some dipshit was stealing a bathroom can of lysol and running away with it. we'd replace it a couple times then it would take a few months before the thievery happened agian. i didnt care much because the office would order more, but i always wondered what kind of person would take a single can of lysol from their work toilet. seems like you arent saving much stealing a half-used can of cleaner spray from work?
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 08:03
|
|
|
the room was not for me
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 08:04
|
|
|
I used to be the janitor at a shoe store. The women's bathroom was always dirtier than the men's bathroom (and every now and then it would smell like rotting fish), but amazingly no one ever poo poo on the ceilings in either one. Though one time i was cleaning the elevator, and as i was spraying the doors down with some metal polisher stuff a lady opened the door and got some chemicals to the face. Maybe she'll get butt cancer from ingesting those chemicals, and then poo poo on the ceiling of her workplace bathroom, and the cycle will be complete. Oh yeah and one time i pretended i was taking a poo poo but i actually rolled a giant joint instead  Beefeater posted:Somehow, some way, someone managed to poop in the wall mounted soap dispenser at my previous place of employment. We used to piss in those in middle school. Was it a solid poop squished inside or did someone manage to aim a stream of liquid poo poo through the opening? redreader posted:The USA is unique in having the massive stall gap. I don't understand it. The guy's probably foreign and rightly thinks the gap is weird. the thing about the "massive" stall gap is that it's big enough to casually glance over and see someone is in there, but small enough that you can't actually see details unless you get close and stare through the gap. And if you do that you're a creepy weirdo and might get your rear end kicked, so most people don't do that. Next time you poo poo in america you can display your anus to the gap and no one will know, i promise i won't look and put you in my poopophile scrapbook
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 09:49
|
|
|
We got the triangular poo poo stamps on the back of the toilet seat where I work, too. I think the reason is a disturbing amount of people don't bother to think about sitting with their cheeks spread when they pinch one, so they just plop down and force their dook through their mushed up rear end fat, causing the entire inside of their buttocks to be just caked in poo poo. Then they wipe haphazardly because gently caress spending that much time wiping your rear end, go out and get sweaty, and when they sit down on the toilet again the combined poop residue and sweat leaves a permanent stain. I've spent a lot of time thinking about this.
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 13:08
|
|
|
What the heck is a workplace washroom OP
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 13:09
|
|
|
KomodoWagon posted:We got the triangular poo poo stamps on the back of the toilet seat where I work, too. I think the reason is a disturbing amount of people don't bother to think about sitting with their cheeks spread when they pinch one, so they just plop down and force their dook through their mushed up rear end fat, causing the entire inside of their buttocks to be just caked in poo poo. Then they wipe haphazardly because gently caress spending that much time wiping your rear end, go out and get sweaty, and when they sit down on the toilet again the combined poop residue and sweat leaves a permanent stain. I've spent a lot of time thinking about this. It warms the heart to hear about men living life to the fullest
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 13:11
|
|
|
Limeys call toilets a "washroom" because they're terrified of real life and have to euphemize everything. Yanks call toilets a "restroom" because they can't take a dump without falling asleep.
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 13:12
|
|
|
¿Donde estan las cacadoras?
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 13:18
|
|
|
Hector Beerlioz posted:Quote this if you've ever jerked off at work
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 13:21
|
|
|
CISMALES DID 9-11 posted:i alwys refer to pooping as going to cut loose some gems Your anus is a gem cutter? I'm not sure what... is there some exercises I can do or something? Alternatively, take stool softeners.
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 13:22
|
|
|
i walked into a stall one time and the entire back of the seat and all the pipes and whatnot leading up to the head where the flusher apparatus is was covered in dry, sprayed diarrhea. a lot of it had also gotten on the painted walls on the side and and back behind. looked just like how a bunch of pressurized blood would have splattered except with poop. caca people. it was as if a person had perched themselves up in a squatting position on the seat and let it rip all over the back instead of aiming their inflamed butthole downwards and into the water basin. it was truly disgusting and i feel genuinely bad for the janitorial staff at my work that had to clean it up.
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 13:24
|
|
|
Forgot to Hector Beerlioz posted:Quote this if you've ever jerked off at work
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 13:25
|
|
|
garfield hentai posted:OH BOY so last week I was poopin' and heard some guy come into the bathroom. I heard him go over to the automatic paper towel dispenser and get like six sheets of paper towels. He then walks over to the stall I'm in and violently shakes the door to confirm that, yes, the closed door means that there is someone in there. He sighs heavily, waddles over to the stall next to me, and starts taking a shitton of toilet paper. Roll roll roll roll roll roll roll roll and I figure that he's just covering the seat despite the fact that we do have actual toilet seat covers. He then straddles the toilet standing up facing towards the wall - so a weird peeing position, not pooping or sitting down on the toilet after getting all that toilet paper - and starts to pee and gets it all over the floor. He pauses, a glob of toilet paper falls down on the floor with a wet THOCK noise, he grumbles and continues peeing. When he's finally done he just kicks the wad of wet toilet paper behind the toilet and shuffles out, gets more paper towels (no sink noises), and leaves. KomodoWagon posted:We got the triangular poo poo stamps on the back of the toilet seat where I work, too. I think the reason is a disturbing amount of people don't bother to think about sitting with their cheeks spread when they pinch one, so they just plop down and force their dook through their mushed up rear end fat, causing the entire inside of their buttocks to be just caked in poo poo. Then they wipe haphazardly because gently caress spending that much time wiping your rear end, go out and get sweaty, and when they sit down on the toilet again the combined poop residue and sweat leaves a permanent stain. I've spent a lot of time thinking about this. Larger (as in both taller and fatter men) have issues with smaller toilets where either you might touch your dilz up against the toilet seat bowl or risk your butthole being close enough to the seat back to shear some off, guess which option people pick in public toilets. Then if nobody cleans them frequently the poop will discolor the seat if its plastic I currently got restroom duty at work and know way more about cleaning public restrooms than I would ever want to but at least these are kept nearly immaculate. I still dont get why people put tp/paper towels in the urinal though. There's no possible reason Rah! posted:I used to be the janitor at a shoe store. The women's bathroom was always dirtier than the men's bathroom (and every now and then it would smell like rotting fish), A Stupid Baby fucked around with this message at 13:48 on Aug 10, 2016 |
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 13:45
|
|
|
CISMALES DID 9-11 posted:i alwys refer to pooping as going to cut loose some gems Try eating a vegitable
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 13:47
|
|
|
KomodoWagon posted:Limeys call toilets a "washroom" because they're terrified of real life and have to euphemize everything. Yanks call toilets a "restroom" because they can't take a dump without falling asleep. lol have you even been to britain u gently caress ing retard ive never heard anyone call it a wash room its just the toilet the loo or the bogs jfc foreigners
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 14:02
|
|
|
Cthulu Carl posted:Long ago I worked at a place where someone was making GBS threads all over the toilet. We had a lot of security cameras in the area so my supervisor would spend hours reviewing tapes, hunting the "Felonious Dooker". As far as I know he remains at large even though it was a small office and there were literally only five of us who could have been doing it, including myself and the supe.
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 14:06
|
|
|
Trojan.exe posted:There also weren't any hooks on any of the stalls so most would just put their bookbags or purses on the floor which was always disgusting. KomodoWagon posted:We got the triangular poo poo stamps on the back of the toilet seat where I work, too. I think the reason is a disturbing amount of people don't bother to think about sitting with their cheeks spread when they pinch one, so they just plop down and force their dook through their mushed up rear end fat, causing the entire inside of their buttocks to be just caked in poo poo. Then they wipe haphazardly because gently caress spending that much time wiping your rear end, go out and get sweaty, and when they sit down on the toilet again the combined poop residue and sweat leaves a permanent stain. I've spent a lot of time thinking about this. I'm just amazed at the amount of making GBS threads ladies do at work. Do they save it for work hours to uphold the myth that women don't poo poo? Are they hiding this from their husbands/boyfriends? I can't poop anywhere else but in my own bathroom in my own home.
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 14:22
|
|
|
redreader posted:I came here to post this. If you ever meet a software developer, there's about a 25-30% chance, max, that they wash their hands with soap. Some people do a half a second rinse without soap if you're lucky. One guy, when I called him out, said "MY DICK IS CLEANER THAN THE TAPS" as justification for not even rinsing. Yep. And it's not dependent on culture either. Americans are just as bad as other nationalities. Can confirm. Our firm rented half a floor to a software development company and none of those fuckers washed their hands. I developed advanced ninja techniques involving extra towels and opening things with my legs to get out of the toilets in their area without touching anything.
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 14:33
|
|
|
Once sat down to poo at work and, mid-movement, the toilet did an autoflush. Person before me had clogged it and it began overflowing with me on top. My only warning was the feeling of cold water on my dick. Thank God I moved in time or I would have been completely soaked.
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 14:45
|
|
|
Millie posted:I'm just amazed at the amount of making GBS threads ladies do at work. Do they save it for work hours to uphold the myth that women don't poo poo? Are they hiding this from their husbands/boyfriends? I can't poop anywhere else but in my own bathroom in my own home. Why take shits on your own time?
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 16:40
|
|
|
Chrs Gry posted:Why take shits on your own time? Work poster spotted Personally, I enjoy pooping. Easily in my top 3 hobbies. AND SOMETIMES I WANT TO ENJOY MYSELF IN THE PRIVACY OF MY OWN HOME gently caress. Serving suggestion for home pooping: relax with a nice single malt and a fine cigar, then just let that brown gold flow
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 18:26
|
|
|
Our office washroom has four wash-sinks in a row and one afternoon I was using one on the very end when someone comes out of the toilet stall and proceeds to use the one right next to me. I muttered "what-the-gently caress" under my breath and gave him the evil eye. Then I zipped up my pants and called him an rear end in a top hat as I was leaving.
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 18:26
|
|
|
Chrs Gry posted:Why take shits on your own time? Where else can you poo poo with the door open?
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 18:38
|
|
|
p sure im the only one in the office of 20 ppl or so who washes their hands in the kitchen before eating lunch on free food day. that and i never hear the faucet running in the in-office bathroom either. in my experience, software developers certainly are filthy little spergboys with their hygiene habits lacking almost as much as their personalities
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 18:40
|
|
|
what the gently caress is this business about dicks being at the wrong angle ... you can move it to whatever angle you want with your hand  are we talkin micro d ??
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 18:41
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 24, 2024 02:41 |
|
|
Mariana Horchata posted:p sure im the only one in the office of 20 ppl or so who washes their hands in the kitchen before eating lunch on free food day. that and i never hear the faucet running in the in-office bathroom either. in my experience, software developers certainly are filthy little spergboys with their hygiene habits lacking almost as much as their personalities I can vouch for this. Im the only one on my dev team that washes hands too.
|
|
#
?
Aug 10, 2016 18:42
|
|