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Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Fun Shoe
suckle upon mine immortal balls

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frogge
Apr 7, 2006


I think you'd have to undergo constant plastic surgery because you don't want governments finding out you're immortal and trapping you in some research site.

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

frogge posted:

I think you'd have to undergo constant plastic surgery because you don't want governments finding out you're immortal and trapping you in some research site.

Even if you got trapped you could always wait them out.

mind the walrus
Sep 22, 2006

Do you get eternal youth?

Jack Trades
Nov 30, 2010

Applewhite posted:

Do you think you'd finally get around to doing all the new things you've been afraid to try because you didn't have time for them? Or do you think you'd waste eternity doing the same things you've wasted your life on only worse because now you don't even have the fear of your own death to motivate you?

I'll travel around the world and freak everyone out by killing myself in as gruesome ways as possible in front as many people as possible.
Hopefully that'll gently caress up many people so that they can also know what it feels like to be dead inside.

brb, pitching the idea to marvel and dc.

Jack Trades
Nov 30, 2010

mind the walrus posted:

Do you get eternal youth?

This is an important question also. I don't want to start with my planned public masturbation routine too late if I'll get old and lose the ability to get a boner.

super sweet best pal
Nov 18, 2009

Applewhite posted:

Even if you got trapped you could always wait them out.

What if they dipped your feet in cement and dropped you on the bottom of the ocean and you didn't get out until the planet exploded and now you're floating through space forever?

Jack Trades
Nov 30, 2010

Has anyone here watched "Ajin"?

Tumble
Jun 24, 2003
I'm not thinking of anything!
Immortality and invulnerability kind of have to go hand in hand. Like, if I live forever that would imply that my cells are at the very least capable of healing and multiplying perfectly or else in a few hundred years I'd just be a non-sentient tumor.

That would also mean that my body would be capable of perfectly regenerating itself like Wolverine, otherwise my organs would eventually shut down after small injury after small injury add up.

Unguided posted:

What if they dipped your feet in cement and dropped you on the bottom of the ocean and you didn't get out until the planet exploded and now you're floating through space forever?

You'd just chew your feet off and wait for them to grow back. If you can't heal you aren't immortal.

Tumble fucked around with this message at 23:08 on Sep 11, 2016

Jack Trades
Nov 30, 2010

Tumble posted:

Immortality and invulnerability kind of have to go hand in hand. Like, if I live forever that would imply that my cells are at the very least capable of healing and multiplying perfectly or else in a few hundred years I'd just be a non-sentient tumor.

That would also mean that my body would be capable of perfectly regenerating itself like Wolverine, otherwise my organs would eventually shut down after small injury after small injury add up.

Not really. You body could just be great at not ever making a mistake when copying DNA and never wearing it down.
That would just make you never age past maturity but not give you any superpowers.

Tumble
Jun 24, 2003
I'm not thinking of anything!

Jack Trades posted:

Not really. You body could just be great at not ever making a mistake when copying DNA and never wearing it down.
That would just make you never age past maturity but not give you any superpowers.

Yea but if I can still be easily taken out by an untreated infection that's not really "immortal", I'm just Tom Cruise at that point.

Jack Trades
Nov 30, 2010

Tumble posted:

Yea but if I can still be easily taken out by an untreated infection that's not really "immortal", I'm just Tom Cruise at that point.

Every discussion about immortality always boils down to the definitions anyways.

Rutibex
Sep 9, 2001

by Fluffdaddy

Jack Trades posted:

Every discussion about immortality always boils down to the definitions anyways.
http://www.dandwiki.com/wiki/SRD:Divine_Ranks#Immortality

quote:

Immortality

All deities (even those of rank 0) are naturally immortal and cannot die from natural causes. Deities do not age, and they do not need to eat, sleep, or breathe. The only way for a deity to die is through special circumstances, usually by being slain in magical or physical combat. Deities of rank 1 or higher are not subject to death from massive damage.

Bulgogi Hoagie
Jun 1, 2012

We
roll my own OS and it would be a good OS

personable decorum
Sep 7, 2016

by FactsAreUseless
There is no immortality without eternal youth and robust appearance configuration options IMO (see eve online etc).

VectorSigma
Jan 20, 2004

Transform
and
Freak Out



will there be other immortals? and if so, how many can there be?

Borrowed Ladder
May 4, 2007

monarch of the sleeping marches
If as an immortal i don't need to eat, sleep, or breathe, and I'm essentially invincible, what does that mean for my physical prowess? Am i the strongest, fastest man in the world? Not really sure how the science there works out but if I don't get tired I could win all the Arm Wrestling matches right?

Robot Danger
Mar 18, 2012
I'd ask for unlimited wishes tbh

MY PALE GOTH SKIN
Nov 28, 2006


meow
track down Lazarus Long and make fun of him for boning his mom

poopnanners
May 3, 2016

hey guys lets party
if???

:confused:

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 10 years!

Whoa. :stare:

hey welcome to the show!
Jan 22, 2014

nobody loves me
If I were immortal I would start a true TV show were I get "killed" in spectacular fashion in public places and film people's responses then come back from the dead and point at the camera.

ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD
Jan 21, 2007

Chinatown posted:

suckle upon mine immortal balls

dookifex_maximus
Aug 10, 2016

by zen death robot
I would bring the dookifex_maximus character to the national stage with my dumb god poopiter optimus maximus

it would be pretty loving sweet, i could make up any old garbage and who are you gonna believe, corpso mcbodybag or the guy who just ate a dozen bullets and wants seconds

The Fuzzy Hulk
Nov 22, 2007

ASK ME ABOUT CROSSING THE STREAMS


I'd get sentenced to life in prison. Have fun paying for my room and board for the next million years, suckers!

ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD
Jan 21, 2007

The Fuzzy Hulk posted:

I'd get sentenced to life in prison. Have fun paying for my room and board for the next million years, suckers!

all the gay sex i can handle but i cant die from the poz

is rod sterling involved?

client
Aug 19, 2010

jump snake river canyon in a go-kart while stoned out of my mind on chinese research chemicals

SIDS Vicious
Jan 1, 1970


i would eat an entire elephant at once

SIDS Vicious
Jan 1, 1970


whats the worst that's gonna happen I have a stomach ache for awhile so what I'm tough as hell I eat glass and stuff it's true

The Bananana
May 21, 2008

This is a metaphor, a Christian allegory. The fact that I have to explain to you that Jesus is the Warthog, and the Banana is drepanocytosis is just embarrassing for you.



Celluloid Sam posted:

whats the worst that's gonna happen I have a stomach ache for awhile so what I'm tough as hell I eat glass and stuff it's true

Is that how you become innortal?

ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD
Jan 21, 2007

client posted:

jump snake river canyon in a go-kart while stoned out of my mind on chinese research chemicals

this but no canyon or chemicals

just bootleg hong kong mario kart for years on end

Chief McHeath
Apr 23, 2002

Um, everything.

ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD
Jan 21, 2007

the cut footage of groundhogs day

you know the one

the dark footage

Blurry Gray Thing
Jun 3, 2009

935 posted:

Research a way to kill myself. Spend every waking hour making sure I could die. What happens when the human civilization goes extinct as it inevitably will? What happens when the sun expands and consumes the earth? You'll just be floating in space forever with just your thoughts to keep you company while you suffer in agony from suffocating and dehydration and starvation and solar radiation and near zero degree temperature. It would be worse than hell.

Or you could spend your immortality finding ways to go beyond physical limitations and become a God, or at least a space-traveling super-being.

You worm your way into the heart of human society, drive technical innovation in ways that are useful to you, but you still carefully make sure that no other human can put together all the pieces. Then you can push all of humanity into the space age, or cause some kind of apocalypse so you're the only person on Earth who knows all the stuff it discovered. Then you build your self-perpetuating nano-spaceship and explore the universe. After that, all you have to worry about is the eventual heat-death of the universe, and you can use that time to find a way into another universe or just a way to transcend it altogether and make your own.

Gawd, it's not even hard, it's just the obvious thing you'd do, am I the only one who thinks about these things?

naem
May 29, 2011

I'd start making safe long term investments and put them in a trust, and create several false identities as my own son and grandson, "inheriting" every 50 years or so. Within a lifetime you'd be well off and two or three you'd be filthy rich

Then I'd create a massive charitable organization of some sort to try to make the world a better place here and there as I can, with a top secret inner circle called "order of the Falcon" where I make super rich people who want to join wear robes and chant and do weird sex stuff just to laugh at them

Punished Chuck
Dec 27, 2010

If it's just the "no natural death" kind of immortality like Legolas or whatever then I'd just sit around and do the same crap I do now, forever.

If it's complete invulnerability I'd join the military and become Casca the Eternal Mercenary.

dookifex_maximus
Aug 10, 2016

by zen death robot
gonna suck being buried in concrete for all eternity as soon as someone with any power tries to ace you, this is why i think the mercenary path is a bad idea, but the first invulnerable ageless human will certainly be its god emperor before long

MiracleWhale
Jun 30, 2015


I'd eat the rear end, op

Tricky D
Apr 1, 2005

I love um!
smoke weed every day

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Booblord Zagats
Oct 30, 2011


Pork Pro
Poop in a volcano

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