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Zephirum
Jan 7, 2011

Lipstick Apathy
Edits ahoy:


Islatsosce Merpents
I think this is the best I can do for this one unfortunately.


Vampiric Caven
This one OTOH I feel a lot better about especially w/r/t flavor.

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girl dick energy
Sep 30, 2009

You think you have the wherewithal to figure out my puzzle vagina?
A heads-up to everyone that I'm starting to work on my results and I'll probably post them right around midnight, PST, so if you've got cards still bouncing around in your head, now's the time to either make them, or let me know you need a few more hours!

Mystic Mongol
Jan 5, 2007

Your life's been thrown in disarray already--I wouldn't want you to feel pressured.


College Slice
One last one, then, partially inspired by Zephirum's orb..

https://twitter.com/RoboRosewater/status/759822445389819904?lang=en

girl dick energy
Sep 30, 2009

You think you have the wherewithal to figure out my puzzle vagina?
:siren: Results Time! :siren:

This was quite a list, especially for a first time back. I was worried that there wouldn't be much turnout, but I am glad to be proven wrong. Can't wait to see what else we've got in store for the future.

As a disclaimer, There were enough great entries that I had to get pretty pedantic about things to properly trim down the field, including minor violations of color identity, and any card where I could think of any way to improve upon the final version mechanically.

Third Place

Rullor Dav, Mindspy by AJ Impy, based off of Rullor Dav
Slavish devotion to the card as presented bore fruit very well here, while also keeping its power level and complexity well within reason. Sadly, the rather uninspired image and creature type kept it from being higher on this list.

Second Place

Hydratic Horse by Lottery of Babylon, based off of Horse
Counter Horse.
This is a brilliant, brilliant extrapolation of a statement with almost no information, and uses the wonderful counter/counter pun. I can only imagine how much fun this card would be in a deck with Judge's Familiar.

And the 1st place card is something that struck me immediately as something I would need to give a spot to, no matter what came next. something that struck me not only as "I could see this printed", but as "why hasn't this been printed yet?". It's a masterwork not only within the context of fixing a RoMaRo card, but of card design in general.

But first, some honorable mentions.
  • Soul Devourer, by Torchlighter, for Best Combo Fuel.
  • Curse of Endless Resurrection, by Mystic Mongol, for Best Perversion of a Keyword.
  • Sink Burdy, by Lottery of Babylon, for Best Use of Photoshop.
  • Fertile Farmland, by Barry Shitpeas, for Best Card That Would Get Banned In Modern.

And the winner is...

Festerpit by Anil Dasharez0ne, based on Myr Ulleuger!
I wish I had the MtG vocabulary to describe just why I like this card so much. It's a dead ringer for older Magic design, for the rare occasion where you had no idea if it was designed top-down or bottom-up, but it worked spectacularly in either context. This is not only my favorite custom card in this contest, but that I've seen at all in recent memory.

So, congratulations, :siren: Anil Dasharez0ne! :siren: You have the next choice! Please announce the theme and end date within 48 hours, if possible.

Sit on my Jace
Sep 9, 2016

Neat! The next theme is:

:siren: Silver Bordered Shenanigans :siren:



We're making un-cards! Come up with something weird and funny that could never be printed in a real set. Cards will be judged on:

  • Humor - This is 100% subjective and I'm not going to try and explain it.
  • Gameplay - Would this actually be fun to play in a game of Magic, or would it just sit in a binder for the occasional chuckle?
  • Mechanical inventiveness - You're not bound by balance, the rules, or good taste, so throw something out there that's totally unlike any card that has been or ever will be printed.
  • Visual inventiveness - Weird layouts, border-busting art, and other sorts of Photoshop fuckery are greatly encouraged.

Entries close Sunday, September 25th and I'll announce a winner then or the day after.

The Human Crouton
Sep 20, 2002

girl dick energy
Sep 30, 2009

You think you have the wherewithal to figure out my puzzle vagina?
First, a couple I thought of that don't need much in the way of visual editing.





Edit Edited Jace to be even more full of hilarious greed-based mind games.

girl dick energy fucked around with this message at 22:41 on Oct 2, 2016

Mystic Mongol
Jan 5, 2007

Your life's been thrown in disarray already--I wouldn't want you to feel pressured.


College Slice
Hateful.


Anyway! New in the latest set, UnPractical, Wizards is introducing the newest innovation in transform effects, eight sided cards! Made by collecting four cards and taping them together edge to edge, so you can fold them such that only one card is showing, this will let designers play with a new arena of shifting effects! I'm sure having four cards and some tape won't make shuffling difficult, but if it bothers you, use a checklist card.

Front of the four cards:



Back of those cards:

girl dick energy
Sep 30, 2009

You think you have the wherewithal to figure out my puzzle vagina?


Ashnod's Coupon, meet card name puns.

girl dick energy fucked around with this message at 22:44 on Oct 2, 2016

Lottery of Babylon
Apr 25, 2012

STRAIGHT TROPIN'



self-explanatory really

Zephirum
Jan 7, 2011

Lipstick Apathy

Approach if you dare, challenger, to see whose :smugwizard: is supreme!

girl dick energy
Sep 30, 2009

You think you have the wherewithal to figure out my puzzle vagina?
Did somebody say "more terrible puns"? I think I heard somebody say "more terrible puns".

girl dick energy fucked around with this message at 22:46 on Oct 2, 2016

AJ_Impy
Jun 17, 2007

SWORD OF SMATTAS. CAN YOU NOT HEAR A WORLD CRY OUT FOR JUSTICE? WHEN WILL YOU DELIVER IT?
Yam Slacker


Or, for extra annoyance, the near-illegible full art version:

AJ_Impy fucked around with this message at 14:14 on Sep 21, 2016

LupusAter
Sep 5, 2011


I think this should specify the units for the weight.

girl dick energy
Sep 30, 2009

You think you have the wherewithal to figure out my puzzle vagina?

LupusAter posted:

I think this should specify the units for the weight.
I think it's a mean-spirited, uncreative joke that should be left without comment.

girl dick energy
Sep 30, 2009

You think you have the wherewithal to figure out my puzzle vagina?


I spent way more time on this image than the card deserves.

Mystic Mongol
Jan 5, 2007

Your life's been thrown in disarray already--I wouldn't want you to feel pressured.


College Slice
I really appreciate that those are all 2/2 bears.

girl dick energy
Sep 30, 2009

You think you have the wherewithal to figure out my puzzle vagina?

Mystic Mongol posted:

I really appreciate that those are all 2/2 bears.
I couldn't decide between Muraganda and Bearscape for the background. Ended up going with Mura because it stood out more clearly.

JimsonTheBetrayer
Oct 13, 2010

Game's over, and fuck you Jimson. It's not my fault that you guys couldn't get your shit together by deadline. No one gets access to docs because I don't fucking care anymore, I hope you all enjoyed ruining my game, and there won't be another.

A more dedicated man than I would have made the other 4 as well. A more dedicated man than I would have also made the border silver, but sadly. Dedication is not my strong suit.

Lottery of Babylon
Apr 25, 2012

STRAIGHT TROPIN'

Two variations on the same theme:

Sit on my Jace
Sep 9, 2016

It being Sunday, here are your results!

Runner-up: Functional Reprint by Poison Mushroom, because I got a sensible chuckle from the flavor text.

Winner: Serra//Angel by Lottery of Babylon. Meld is fresh enough for riffing on it to be funny, and a split card that actually splits is a clever use of the frame. I especially like how it would play in limited - a Serra Angel that survives removal is incredibly strong, but with the major drawback that after it unmelds you won't have it in future games.

Congratulations to :siren:Lottery of Babylon:siren:!

girl dick energy
Sep 30, 2009

You think you have the wherewithal to figure out my puzzle vagina?
I was really hoping one of those split cards (ha) was gonna win. It's a really clever concept.

Lottery of Babylon
Apr 25, 2012

STRAIGHT TROPIN'

:siren: Auras for Noncreatures :siren:



Enchant Land, Enchant Player, Enchant Artifact, and even more unique enchant lines. Show me what Auras can do when they're not giving enchanted creature +2/+2 or making enchanted creature unable to attack or block. There's a lot of design space here that rarely gets any attention.



Cards that are only sometimes Auras are obviously great. Cards that turn noncreatures into creatures are permitted. You want to be careful with "Enchant permanent", since those Auras can still go on creatures and often will; if you're putting creature-specific clauses on your Aura like "has haste" or "can't attack or block", it's a good sign you've gone too far, but even more generic effects like "You control enchanted permanent" will most often just steal a big creature. I'm actually fine with enchanting creature cards that aren't on the battlefield (they're technically not creatures!) since that's done so rarely and is so different from just enchanting a creature, but if they just put that creature card onto the battlefield and become a regular "enchant creature" Aura afterward, maybe that's not quite such a good fit. As always, the more interesting your card is, the more leeway it gets.

Submissions will be judged on inventiveness, balance, and being cool as heck. Let's wrap this up Sunday night.

Mystic Mongol
Jan 5, 2007

Your life's been thrown in disarray already--I wouldn't want you to feel pressured.


College Slice
Blue needs more removal.



e: Urgh, it was two mana land destruction. I had to toss nonland on there.

Mystic Mongol fucked around with this message at 06:04 on Sep 30, 2016

AJ_Impy
Jun 17, 2007

SWORD OF SMATTAS. CAN YOU NOT HEAR A WORLD CRY OUT FOR JUSTICE? WHEN WILL YOU DELIVER IT?
Yam Slacker
Let's hearken back to something iconic from the very beginning..



Not entirely a new concept: Soulfire Grand Master did something similar for instants and sorceries whilst Sydri, Galvanic Genius can do it for artifacts if she turns them into creatures first, but putting lifelink and deathtouch on noncreatures is both viable and can cause all sorts of nastiness. Planeswalkers which deal damage love this, and there are quite a few damage-dealing lands such as Desert or Keldon Necropolis which get that much better. Stick it on an Aether Flash, run indestructible or regenerating creatures. Make Talon of Pain into a self-replenishing pinger. Nullify the drawback from Torture Chamber.Speed up Five-Alarm Fire. Plonk it on Caltrops or Lightmine Field for maximum Moating. All this and more!

girl dick energy
Sep 30, 2009

You think you have the wherewithal to figure out my puzzle vagina?
I started with "enchant enchantment because it sounded silly... and ended up with something I'd probably actually play.



There's not a lot of precedent for the mana cost on something like this. Indestructibility hits any permanent, but is too expensive to be playable in anything but limited. W felt far too low for a source of indestructible. Copy Enchantment has a lot of ways you can abuse it coming with actually having two of whatever you're copying, and WW would make it almost unplayable on anything except white anthems. So 1W it is!



This one doesn't need much introduction, I think. Sometimes a card is just a little too powerful, but the concept is too good to throw away. It's an Artifact Enchantment (Enchantment Artifact?) to make it extra vulnerable to removal, and it's 1U instead of U so it doesn't just give the most degenerate combos 8 copies of Voltaic.

girl dick energy fucked around with this message at 21:45 on Sep 26, 2016

Gynovore
Jun 17, 2009

Forget your RoboCoX or your StickyCoX or your EvilCoX, MY CoX has Blinking Bewbs!

WHY IS THIS GAME DEAD?!

BagOfDucks
Nov 9, 2009

I know the mechanic was previously colorless, but I really don't want to drag Maro's color theory into this...

AJ_Impy
Jun 17, 2007

SWORD OF SMATTAS. CAN YOU NOT HEAR A WORLD CRY OUT FOR JUSTICE? WHEN WILL YOU DELIVER IT?
Yam Slacker

BagOfDucks posted:


I know the mechanic was previously colorless, but I really don't want to drag Maro's color theory into this...

Leyline of Singularity was blue, legendariness manipulation seems about right there.

Lottery of Babylon
Apr 25, 2012

STRAIGHT TROPIN'

I was worried at first that this was too narrow/dry a contest theme. Then the first day's entries blew me away. Now activity's dried up and I'm back to thinking it was too narrow.

There's still a couple days left to make some sweet Auras!

girl dick energy
Sep 30, 2009

You think you have the wherewithal to figure out my puzzle vagina?
Well now I feel bad.



How about an enchantment counterspell? It's basically a Remand that doesn't cycle, but I think it balances out with delaying the spell, or possibly hard-countering it, if the player doesn't have enchantment removal.



Because who the gently caress needs Leyline of Sanctity? The costing is a little weird, but I think it's justified, since it doesn't actually stop burn or discard spells, it just copies them. There's probably also shenanigans to be had with using self-targeting spells.

girl dick energy fucked around with this message at 00:48 on Oct 1, 2016

Zephirum
Jan 7, 2011

Lipstick Apathy

Nothing too crazy, just an interesting choice and a loose thematic homage to a famous reserved card.

e:tweaks

Zephirum fucked around with this message at 02:54 on Oct 1, 2016

mandatory lesbian
Dec 18, 2012

Poison Mushroom posted:

Well now I feel bad.



How about an enchantment counterspell? It's basically a Remand that doesn't cycle, but I think it balances out with delaying the spell, or possibly hard-countering it, if the player doesn't have enchantment removal.

this doesn't do what you think it does, it would need to be templated like Spell Queller to do what you want

Mystic Mongol
Jan 5, 2007

Your life's been thrown in disarray already--I wouldn't want you to feel pressured.


College Slice
Although that DOES give me an idea for a spell designed to stop multiple counterspells. Like, if someone removed soul your creature and then you played a giant growth on something and they countered that too. Or... flusterstorm? Or any other of the ones of totally legitimate reasons for a bunch of enemy counterspells to be on the stack and relevant at the same time.



That shoooooould stick around long enough to protect the bottom spell on the stack (that you'd presumably cast it on) although it could be counter'd itself.

mdct
Sep 2, 2011

Tingle tingle kooloo limpah.
These are my magic words.

Don't steal them.


I made the most narrow Animate Dead to ever exist.

JimsonTheBetrayer
Oct 13, 2010

Game's over, and fuck you Jimson. It's not my fault that you guys couldn't get your shit together by deadline. No one gets access to docs because I don't fucking care anymore, I hope you all enjoyed ruining my game, and there won't be another.


I love the idea of a player enchantment that's both a boon and a bother.

Elyv
Jun 14, 2013



JimsonTheBetrayer posted:



I love the idea of a player enchantment that's both a boon and a bother.

in the vast majority of games this is pure upside, although not really worth 2UUU

JimsonTheBetrayer
Oct 13, 2010

Game's over, and fuck you Jimson. It's not my fault that you guys couldn't get your shit together by deadline. No one gets access to docs because I don't fucking care anymore, I hope you all enjoyed ruining my game, and there won't be another.

Elyv posted:

in the vast majority of games this is pure upside, although not really worth 2UUU

My concern is how to handle the conflicts of Draw 2 Discard 3 when they only have 2 cards in hand.

TheCog
Jul 30, 2012

I AM ZEPA AND I CLAIM THESE LANDS BY RIGHT OF CONQUEST

JimsonTheBetrayer posted:

My concern is how to handle the conflicts of Draw 2 Discard 3 when they only have 2 cards in hand.

I believe the rule is you do as much as you can. So you draw two, and discard your whole hand. The same way that if you get hit with hymn of tourach when you only have one card in hand, you just discard that card.

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Elyv
Jun 14, 2013



JimsonTheBetrayer posted:

My concern is how to handle the conflicts of Draw 2 Discard 3 when they only have 2 cards in hand.

I see draw 2 discard 1, draw 1 discard 1, and draw 3 discard 3.

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