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why get a lamp at all when you can read by smart-candlelight?
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Oct 14, 2016 22:23
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Wrath of the Bitch King posted:why get a lamp at all when you can read by smart-candlelight? fortunately this failed: https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/246632126/fogo-adventure-gadget-gps-flashlight-walkie-talkie?ref=category
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Oct 14, 2016 22:32
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OSI bean dip posted:fortunately this failed: still getting made apparently quote:Orders Placed Now Ship in October 2016
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Oct 14, 2016 22:38
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im the App-based OS
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Oct 15, 2016 13:20
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not gonna lie, I was mildly interested in it since I go hiking all the time, but then I saw the *discounted* price of 300 dollars.
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Oct 15, 2016 14:18
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it's like a lovely phone
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Oct 15, 2016 18:06
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yes, exactly what i cravee. a single point of failure to leave me literally deaf mute lost and in the dark
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Oct 15, 2016 21:34
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Oct 22, 2016 16:55
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http://inhabitat.com/yves-behar-mit-partnered-with-pediatrician-to-create-first-ever-smart-responsive-infant-crib/quote:After early-stage collaboration with MIT Media Lab engineer Deb Roy and others, Behar and Karp designed a smart crib from the inside out, starting with a brand new drive train, and the whole thing is packaged in a beautiful bassinet that would fit into the decor of just about any home. quote:The SNOO crib also plays a variety of white noise specific to the amount of the infant’s crying: a low-pitched white noise helps a tired baby fall asleep, while a higher pitched white noise may calm a fussy infant. quote:A shielded WiFi connection lets parents control the crib’s movement and sound from afar (or just across the room), although no interaction is necessary for the smart crib to do its thing. quote:“When the baby fusses, [SNOO] responds in seconds with increasing motion and sound – just like parents do – to find the right level of sensation for calming that baby, at that time,” said Béhar. KSSHHHHHH ALL IS WELL, SMALL HUMAN KSSSSSHHHHHHHHH
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Oct 22, 2016 16:58
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all watched over by machines of loving grace
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Oct 22, 2016 17:01
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infernal machines posted:all watched over by machines of loving grace
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Oct 22, 2016 17:09
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until the hackers get in anyway hell hath no fury like a machine pwned
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Oct 22, 2016 19:33
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a bunch of idiots couldn't get into their house because their dumb smart locks couldn't access the internet during the ddos. ~the future~
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Oct 22, 2016 19:35
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this is everything i expected from the grim cyberpunk present
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Oct 22, 2016 19:47
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The Management posted:a bunch of idiots couldn't get into their house because their dumb smart locks couldn't access the internet during the ddos. ~the future~ how did a product like that make it out of user testing oh, wait
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Oct 22, 2016 19:53
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developers never, ever consider network conditions simply because they don't operate on that osi layer anything below a standard library might as well be magical fairies
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Oct 22, 2016 21:27
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i don't think that's entirely fair. for every developer not aware packets might not make it where they're supposed to, there's the paranoid distributed system dev constructing ever more complex scenarios where the universe conspires to gently caress around packets going ten feet from one rack to another. possibly up to and including packets traveling back in time because you never know i'll admit the average iot dev does seem to tend towards the former case, unfortunately
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Oct 22, 2016 21:36
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OSI bean dip posted:fortunately this failed: quote:the only gadget that includes GPS, bluetooth, digital voice messaging, USB backup battery, and a powerful LED flashlight.
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Oct 23, 2016 12:06
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Djeser posted:http://inhabitat.com/yves-behar-mit-partnered-with-pediatrician-to-create-first-ever-smart-responsive-infant-crib/ as someone with a newborn, it's way too small, sleep sacks do a lot, don't need to bolt your kid down sonatinas fucked around with this message at 12:41 on Oct 23, 2016 |
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Oct 23, 2016 12:39
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 It's a belt that tells you how much you walk and how fat you are
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Oct 23, 2016 16:43
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Deep Dish Fuckfest posted:i'll admit the average iot dev does seem to tend towards the former case, unfortunately the average iot dev is an employee at a Chinese chip factory. he is writing minimally functional sample code to give to customers of the company's chips. those customers will then do the least they can to personalize that code to their needs and ship it in their product. the first guy doesn't give a poo poo about security because his bosses don't care about anything but selling chips. the second guy barely knows what the gently caress they're doing because they're really app developers who are just dicking around in the embedded firmware. they probably don't have the skills and probably don't have time and money to rewrite it securely, assuming they even understood what its current flaws are. this is how we get the glorious future
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Oct 23, 2016 17:51
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72 thousands of dollars for something a tailor's tape and a pedometer could do for ~70¢ gently caress the future
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Oct 23, 2016 18:18
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such a waiste
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Oct 23, 2016 18:26
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i would rather have a smartbelt than keep my phone in my pocket 24/7 or wear a bracelet. in theory. i dont count steps or gaf.
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Oct 23, 2016 18:59
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can i install an app that keeps track of how often i whip my kids on that thing? maybe have it vibrate when it's time for discipline? i want to make sure i'm raisin' em right and not have em turn into gay communist democrats
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Oct 23, 2016 19:02
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that's the least appealing name i've seen for any kickstarter product so far our new smart to-do list! it's called blister
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Oct 23, 2016 19:32
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internet of poo poo megathread - dns muerte
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Oct 23, 2016 19:42
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atomicthumbs posted:that's the least appealing name i've seen for any kickstarter product so far the "stack" feature in the mac os dock used to be called "piles" until some marketing genius figured it out
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Oct 23, 2016 20:03
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Deep Dish Fuckfest posted:can i install an app that keeps track of how often i whip my kids on that thing? maybe have it vibrate when it's time for discipline? i want to make sure i'm raisin' em right and not have em turn into gay communist democrats your belt reported you to social services
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Oct 23, 2016 22:52
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SpaceAceJase posted:your belt reported you to social services THANKS IOT!
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Oct 24, 2016 00:05
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Captain Foo posted:internet of poo poo megathread - dns muerte
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Oct 24, 2016 01:03
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creationist believer posted:"Okay, maybe it's only part metal. You know, like the OmniLock. A metal key with an RFID Authenticator inside." on more than one occasion in tyool 2016, i had to remind people that even if the battery in their car key died, it was still a key, therefore no you don't get to call a tow truck and i'm not talking about these:  rather, these: 
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Oct 24, 2016 01:56
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surebet posted:on more than one occasion in tyool 2016, i had to remind people that even if the battery in their car key died, it was still a key, therefore no you don't get to call a tow truck yeah i did that one to my grandma in the summer i was going to borrow her car, she walks me out and says "okay, the button doesn't work right...i think it needs a new battery...so you have to press it a lot..."*press press press press press* "and it'll unlock after a while, i've been meaning to fix it. *press press press press press* here, you try it." hands me the key and i put it in the door and unlocked it. "it's okay, i can always do this, right?" she was very sheepish
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Oct 24, 2016 02:15
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the joke's on me tho: that's probably only obvious to me because my car doesn't have power anything
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Oct 24, 2016 02:16
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i also have a couple stories related to people not pulling these things: after a power outage in a room with fail secure doors
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Oct 24, 2016 02:24
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surebet posted:i also have a couple stories related to people not pulling these things: they shouldnt have conditioned everybody in public school with the dye packs then
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Oct 24, 2016 03:46
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Oct 24, 2016 04:08
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*if you do not enable voice recognition it will be active anyway and your voice and associated texts will still be transmitted to a third party
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Oct 24, 2016 04:17
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The Management posted:the average iot dev is an employee at a Chinese chip factory. he is writing minimally functional sample code to give to customers of the company's chips. those customers will then do the least they can to personalize that code to their needs and ship it in their product. the first guy doesn't give a poo poo about security because his bosses don't care about anything but selling chips. the second guy barely knows what the gently caress they're doing because they're really app developers who are just dicking around in the embedded firmware. they probably don't have the skills and probably don't have time and money to rewrite it securely, assuming they even understood what its current flaws are. how do I find these chucklefucks and convince them to consult to me for all their embedded bullshit
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Oct 24, 2016 04:22
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creationist believer posted:"Okay, maybe it's only part metal. You know, like the OmniLock. A metal key with an RFID Authenticator inside." my god... they're made out of metal
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Oct 24, 2016 04:27
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