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After a not-very-long but extremely active offseason, the National Basketball Association is back! Congratulations to the Cleveland Cavaliers on their first ever championship! And to the Golden State Warriors for the most bitchmade free agency signing ever! Good luck to the rest of the teams in the NBA on stopping either of these teams from making the Finals for the third year in a row. A quick recap of what every other team did last year and their notable offseason moves ATLANTIC DIVISION Toronto Raptors: 56-26; lost in the conference finals. Lost Bismack Biyombo and signed Jared Sullinger. Boston Celtics: 48-34; lost in first round. Signed Al Horford, drafted Jaylen Brown and lost Sullinger and Evan Turner. New York Knicks: 32-50. Hired Jeff Hornacek. Traded Robin Lopez for Derrick Rose. Signed Joakim Noah and Brandon Jennings. Brooklyn Nets: 21-61. Hired Kenny Atkinson. Lost Thaddeus Young and signed Jeremy Lin and Luis Scola. Philadelphia 76ers: 10-72(!). Drafted Ben Simmons, brought over Dario Saric and cleared Joel Embiid to play. SOUTHEAST DIVISION Miami Heat: 48-34; lost in second round. Lost Dwyane Wade and won't clear Chris Bosh. Signed...Dion Waiters. Atlanta Hawks: 48-34; lost in second round. Lost Al Horford and traded Jeff Teague. Signed Dwight Howard. Charlotte Hornets: 48-34; lost in first round. Lost Jeremy Lin and Al Jefferson. Signed Roy Hibbert. Washington Wizards: 41-41. Hired Scott Brooks. Lost Nene and Jared Dudley. Signed Ian Mahinmi, who got hurt. Orlando Magic: 35-47: Hired Frank Vogel. Traded Victor Oladipo (among others) for Serge Ibaka. Signed Bismack Biyombo. CENTRAL DIVISION Cleveland Cavaliers: 57-25; won championship. Lost Timofey Mozgov and Matthew Dellavedova. Signed Mike Dunleavy Jr. Indiana Pacers: 45-37; lost in first round. Fired Frank Vogel and promoted Nate McMillan. Traded George Hill for Jeff Teague. Signed Al Jefferson and Thaddeus Young. Detroit Pistons: 44-38; lost in first round. Signed Jon Leuer and Ish Smith. Chicago Bulls: 42-40. Traded Derrick Rose for Robin Lopez. Lost Joakim Noah. Signed Dwyane Wade and Rajon Rondo. Traded Tony Snell for Michael Carter-Williams. Milwaukee Bucks: 33-49. Traded Michael Carter-Williams for Tony Snell. Signed Matthew Dellavedova and Mirza Teletovic. SOUTHWEST DIVISION San Antonio Spurs: 67-15; lost in second round. Tim Duncan retired. Signed Pau Gasol and David Lee. Dallas Mavericks: 42-40; lost in first round. Lost Chandler Parsons. Signed Harrison Barnes and traded picks for Andrew Bogut. Memphis Grizzlies: 42-40; lost in first round. Fired Dave Joerger and hired David Fizdale. Signed Chandler Parsons. Houston Rockets: 41-41; lost in first round. Hired Mike D'Antoni. Lost Dwight Howard and Terrence Jones. Signed Eric Gordon and Ryan Anderson. Motiejunas is holding out. New Orleans Pelicans: 30-52. Lost Eric Gordon and Ryan Anderson. Drafted Buddy Hield and signed Lance Stephenson, Terrence Jones, Solomon Hill, E'Twaun Moore and Langston Galloway. Bryce DeJean-Jones was killed NORTHWEST DIVISION Oklahoma City Thunder: 55-27; lost in conference finals. Lost Kevin Durant. Traded Serge Ibaka for Victor Oladipo and more. Portland Trail Blazers: 44-38; lost in second round. Signed Festus Ezeli and Evan Turner. Utah Jazz: 40-42. Traded for George Hill. Signed Joe Johnson. Denver Nuggets: 33-49. Traded Joffrey Lauvergne and drafted Jamal Murray. Minnesota Timberwolves: 29-53. Hired Tom Thibodeau. Drafted Kris Dunn. Kevin Garnett retired. PACIFIC DIVISION Golden State Warriors: 73-9. Blew a 3-1 lead in the NBA Finals. Lost Andrew Bogut and Harrison Barnes. Signed Zaza Pachulia, David West and JaVale McGee. Los Angeles Clippers: 53-29; lost in first round. Signed Marreese Speights and Alan Anderson. Sacramento Kings: 33-49. Hired Dave Joerger. Signed Ty Lawson and Arron Afflalo. Drafted a bunch of bigs. Phoenix Suns: 23-59. Drafted Dragan Bender and Marquese Chriss. Signed Leandro Barbosa. Los Angeles Lakers: 17-65. Hired Luke Walton. Kobe Bryant retired. Drafted Brandon Ingram and signed Luol Deng and Timofey Mozgov. More in depth breakdowns here: https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3792813&perpage=40 The theme song of the NBA thread: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V_h7Lm7C9Nk Let's hoop it up! Henchman of Santa fucked around with this message at 14:48 on Oct 25, 2016 |
# ¿ Oct 25, 2016 13:55 |
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# ¿ Apr 28, 2024 03:20 |
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Does anyone want to make a list of writers to follow and podcasts to listen to? I'll add them to the OP.
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# ¿ Oct 25, 2016 14:07 |
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Kibner posted:Team specific or general league? General league preferably but you can include team ones.
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# ¿ Oct 25, 2016 14:29 |
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LarksTongues posted:Lurker checking in for the first time, I've been following this thread for years. As a wizards fan is there any silver lining this year? Obviously Durant wasnt going to happen, but we are counting on beal to stay healthy for a whole year, our bench is atrocious, and I still cant believe we panic traded a 1st last year for Morris. Oh and Scotty Brooks... Your weird, mediocre roster can still get to the 7 or 8 seed in the East.
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# ¿ Oct 25, 2016 15:51 |
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wandler20 posted:Go Thunder. They should sure be fun to watch this year and I hope Russ does many cool Russ things. Hopefully Dipo also does cool things. I used single team League Pass for the Pistons last year and had no problems with it. Re-upped again this year.
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# ¿ Oct 25, 2016 16:22 |
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Bush Did Outer Heaven posted:https://twitter.com/NBA/status/790568826802929664 It's hard to fit the version with 14 E's in "Detroit" and 12 A's in "Basketball"
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# ¿ Oct 25, 2016 18:18 |
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Dale Ouise posted:Hi, I'm trying to follow this thread and watch more basketball because my favourite hockey team traded their coolest player for no good reason. Welcome, friend, to the superior 5 on 5 game
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# ¿ Oct 25, 2016 19:01 |
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AggressivelyStupid posted:N: warriors got dumpsturd I was gonna say the Heat
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# ¿ Oct 26, 2016 05:47 |
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https://twitter.com/futurecanon/status/791142456934924288
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# ¿ Oct 26, 2016 06:02 |
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lol the Sixers AND the Lakers are both on national TV tonight.
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# ¿ Oct 26, 2016 13:29 |
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straight up brolic posted:where are you from in Denmark? I've been noticing that the game is getting much more popular in Scandinavia/my friends are playing a lot more often. Would be cool to have some Nordic players in the league in 20 years. Is Jonas Jerebko not enough for you?
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# ¿ Oct 26, 2016 14:41 |
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sba posted:Is it weird that I got into the NBA and finally caved to League Pass because of the social media aspects of it?? Always feel free to ask questions!
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# ¿ Oct 26, 2016 22:21 |
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Dejan Bimble posted:I take back everything bad I've ever said about Reggie Jackson How did DeRozan get 40 points in three quarters? The defense looked loving putrid.
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# ¿ Oct 27, 2016 03:18 |
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The Brow put up 50/16/5 with 7 steals and 4 blocks. Mother of god. Of course they lost because their starting point guard is Tim Frazier but whatever
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# ¿ Oct 27, 2016 03:50 |
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Dexo posted:KD has reached a new never before seen level of shookness. And it's only game one Hahahahaha
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# ¿ Oct 28, 2016 06:04 |
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Dejan Bimble posted:When you can draft yourself a slim boris diaw 1st overall, you do it Boris has a jumper though
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# ¿ Oct 28, 2016 14:38 |
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euphronius posted:The goal of every team is to win . So they obliterated a normal team for four years so that they could once again become a normal team but with slightly more potential. Congratu-loving-lations.
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# ¿ Oct 28, 2016 17:38 |
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The Process is the NBA fan version of The Red Pill.
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# ¿ Oct 28, 2016 17:43 |
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ragle posted:Hinkie in summer 2013 took over a team coming off a 34-48 season where their 10 best players by win shares descending were Thad Young, Dorell Wright, Spencer Hawes, Jrue Holiday, Lavoy Allen, Nick Young, Evan Turner, Damien Wilkins, Arnett Moultrie, Jason Richardson. All three are better than the Sixers are right now.
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# ¿ Oct 28, 2016 18:23 |
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chunkles posted:Nene had a bizarre statline (0-2 FG, 8-12 FT). Something I would kinda expect from Harden. Guy looks like he's gonna be good for 2 million though so whatever. I am a fan of Nene until he gets injured. Do they have a third center option for when that happens?
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# ¿ Oct 29, 2016 05:16 |
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Dejan Bimble posted:Beno Udrih had a classic Beno game last night. I love that loving slovenian idiot and his awful haircut I missed the whole game. Wanna recap it for me?
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# ¿ Oct 29, 2016 14:46 |
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Do you still have that picture of Tony rolling up on a bike in the ghetto?
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# ¿ Oct 29, 2016 19:12 |
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chunkles posted:Dejan was Singler ever OK or am I thinking of Jonas Jerebko? Probably just getting my white Pistons journeymen from 5 years ago mixed up here Jonas Jerebko was literally the best player on the team one season. Singler was never good. Also neither are journeymen. They're both on their second teams.
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# ¿ Oct 29, 2016 20:44 |
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Tae posted:Whatever happened to Noah Vonleh, he's like the only person I never hear of from the '14 draft Got traded to Portland and is bad
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# ¿ Oct 29, 2016 20:51 |
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chunkles posted:My bad, I'm doing pushups and reading Zach Lowe articles as penance You have to 5 reps for every team Ish Smith has played on as punishment for journeyman misidentification.
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# ¿ Oct 29, 2016 22:56 |
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ChickenMedium posted:How is this a question? None of the Zellers went to Duke. Mason Plumlee is so Duke that he looks like he was in a documentary about an early 90s college team that had to play Duke in the title game.
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# ¿ Oct 30, 2016 00:57 |
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How did Dougie McBuckets dominate the Pacers lmao
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# ¿ Oct 30, 2016 06:04 |
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Metapod posted:Why are we still having this discussion? Steph got hurt then preceded to come back later in the playoffs. He played and was still able to a lot of good things. He got outplayed and his decision making lost him the series. Playoff performance != how good you are Most people are joking, at least to an extent.
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# ¿ Oct 31, 2016 05:45 |
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ElPedro posted:Imagine going from human victory cigar to this (Team USA). Pretty drat nice. I mean being a Human Victory Cigar was just the product of being on a team with at least 8 hall of famers on it. I don't think anyone expected him to have a Laettner like career. What's insane about the Brow is that he was a defensive-minded player in college whose offense was unpolished. In the NBA his offensive game has quickly developed to a ridiculous degree and his defense is subject to debate.
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# ¿ Nov 1, 2016 14:38 |
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Ersan probably demanded a trade because Kanter wouldn't stop talking to him about Gulenism
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# ¿ Nov 1, 2016 21:05 |
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Thunder now have two of the most violent rim attackers
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# ¿ Nov 1, 2016 21:28 |
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Smellyhead posted:Does anyone know what Boban went as for Halloween? A human
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# ¿ Nov 1, 2016 22:56 |
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The Pistons have won three straight against bad teams and have two more on their schedule before they play another good one. Everyone seems to be contributing and Ish + Beno keep things afloat much more easily than the horrors of Steve Blake and Spencer Dinwiddie. They may shrug off Jackson's injury after all.
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# ¿ Nov 2, 2016 13:41 |
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Cool Buff Man posted:Toby Harris is having himself a very nice start As is our secret best player Marcus Morris.
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# ¿ Nov 2, 2016 13:55 |
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The Nets will ride the league's most racially diverse starting 5 to glory
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# ¿ Nov 3, 2016 02:50 |
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https://twitter.com/jon_greenberg/status/794006365018656768
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# ¿ Nov 3, 2016 03:52 |
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lowly abject turd posted:Which team has the biggest homers as sportscasters? I've been watching games in spanish when possible but from what i've seen okc are pretty big homers. That might just be more a reflection of my watching raptors & thunder games though. It seems like the sweetest gig tbh. Boston, infamously so.
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# ¿ Nov 3, 2016 15:21 |
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Please Eat A Vegetable posted:But really, does anyone expect a truly objective home announcer anywhere? I like the Pistons' crew because while they are homers, they also try very hard to make every opponent sound like a mighty force that the Pistons must rise to defeat. Even last year's Sixers.
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# ¿ Nov 3, 2016 21:21 |
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PurpleJesus posted:Austin Carr is the goddamn best and I won't hear a negative word against him. Also, now that I'm caught up on the thread, I will try to lurk less. That post came from DEEP IN THE Q
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# ¿ Nov 4, 2016 00:04 |
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# ¿ Apr 28, 2024 03:20 |
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"Meet me at the rim, don't be late." is a great catchphrase.
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# ¿ Nov 4, 2016 03:23 |