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i found a d20 and rolled it until it showed 20, then the door opened |
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Jul 20, 2017 06:21
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why does this dungeon constantly play rush??? and why do the gargoyles want to talk about lossless audio compression
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Jul 20, 2017 06:22
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i tried to shuffle across this narrow ledge i found instead of finishing the puzzle that would lower the drawbridge. the wizard yelled and now i'm stuck in a stasis spell and he's consulting his rule book, 5th edition.
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Jul 20, 2017 06:24
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apparently it's allowed. the wizard is so mad, you guys. he tried to zap me but i guess now his spells are on cooldown? his god gave him something called disadvantage, and i heard it laughing.
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Jul 20, 2017 06:25
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the wizard just yelled at me for 30 minutes bc my friend jocelyn shared a picture from i loving love science's facebook. i don't care if it's not science it's just loving facebook, craig. get off my back lest the fist bones connect to the craig bones if you get my meaning.
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Jul 20, 2017 06:27
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what does molex to six-pin mean and why is this wizard lecturing me
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Jul 20, 2017 06:27
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A wizard’s workshop is never where you want to wake, but woken poor William was when - without warning - WHOMP! A tremendous rumble sent bookshelves and trinkets and baubles tumbling from the walls to join him on the weirdly warped wooden floor, and behind it echoed a banshee-wail of a horse's braying. He rose to a pounding headache and the dead weight of a resounding twenty-eight bottles of mead or wine or whatever they were, impishly stacked on his back, which fell (not so gracefully) to the now-slumbering planks below with little giggling clinks. There was a party here last night, as evidenced by strewn glassware and the general haze of smoke which hung low to the floor, and also the enormous neon sign on the far wall which in brilliant red and purple letters read “PARTY HERE LAST NITE”. He in fact vividly remembered the wizard twinkling his fingers as the clock struck midnight and the words changed themselves in a pyrotechnic flash, which seemed almost banal in comparison to the other tricks on display. He hardly had time to assess his surroundings when - WHOMP! There it was again, followed by the same ghostly neighing! The room shook and the one remaining bookcase spilled ancient leatherbound tomes with tattered pages into the growing mire of the floor. A large glass sphere full of a sickly glowing green liquid was knocked off its stand and crashed against the ground, shattering and spilling its contents. “Who even keeps this stuff out during a party?” William pondered, but his inquisition was soon interrupted by crackling green flames erupting where the spilled liquid touched the pages of strewn books. The flames started small and seemed not to seethe and grow or spread beyond the boundaries of the pages that lapped them up. They produced a thick and pale green smoke twinkling with tiny fragments of stars and other fantastical glimmers which wholly entranced William. As they drew his gaze and he peered deeper he began to see strange apparitions, figures of shadow drifting through the smoke and occasionally reaching tenebrous limbs toward him, their fingers replaced with wisps of dark smog. What’s more, each and every one of them appeared to be adorned with rather expensive name-brand sunglasses, and the words "DEAL WITH IT, WILLIAM" exploded in brilliant lights behind them, so luminous that poor William was launched off his feet. It was worrisome enough to wake in a wizard's workshop, but what's worse was this fucker's the memelord. deep dish peat moss fucked around with this message at 06:31 on Jul 20, 2017 |
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Jul 20, 2017 06:28
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guys this wizard just conjured one of those dog advice meme things with the color background and the blaoh its punching me it's punchin my kidneys you guys
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Jul 20, 2017 06:35
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okay the wizard corrected me it's not my kidneys it's my liver and now comes the liver lecture
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Jul 20, 2017 06:36
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guys i opened one of his 1980's mint in box thundercats action figures and the conjured meme discorporeated
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Jul 20, 2017 06:37
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help he's summoning a 108 page reddit thread comparing the prices of disposable razors
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Jul 20, 2017 06:38
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wow man this betamax stuff makes great bandages of warding which according to this book i found gives me +3 nerd revulsion
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Jul 20, 2017 06:39
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i found a ring of mirror image and disguised myself as the nerd wizard but his familiar found me out when i chose twizzlers over red vines
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Jul 20, 2017 06:40
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i asked the wizard why his dungeon doesn't separate his armory and treasury from his dungeon but now he's yelling about 'dynamic difficulty'
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Jul 20, 2017 06:42
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oh my god you guys i found the wizards livejournal
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Jul 20, 2017 06:42
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steeling myself against the shield of adult responsibility, i feel another dualistic hero fantasy glance off of it's 'realistic, honestly craig, maybe it's time you stopped this' sheen. bringing all of my bardic power to force, i begin to recite his monthly expenses on mini figurines and dungeon manuals.
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Jul 20, 2017 06:46
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the wizards mother is yelling.
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Jul 20, 2017 06:46
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we have to keep it down? i don't give a gently caress man, get kicked out of this house. how do you even have a dungeon under a house. you're a fuckin goon
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Jul 20, 2017 06:47
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you can always tell a nerd wizard from the regular wizard bc the nerd wizard will have the totinos pizza rolls print lining on his robes always
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Jul 20, 2017 06:48
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imagine a powerful warlock, his essence a towering inferno of arcane energies, a vortex of destruction and creation. now imagine that warlock getting on to a forum to argue about game of thrones. this is how nerd wizards are created. the process is almost instantaneous. there is no pain. soon, only the DVR of how it's made will remain
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Jul 20, 2017 06:49
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i have trapped the wizard in a thought puzzle of his own design. you fool, who cares of it's spelled sherbet. you say sherbert. every drat body says sherbert
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Jul 20, 2017 06:51
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the nerd wizard thought i could never escape, but he didn't count on one thing. i know which night his mom takes the car for bingo.
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Jul 20, 2017 06:54
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i just cancelled the nerd wizard's eve online account and it shredded like half his hp off
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Jul 20, 2017 06:55
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all of the dungeon bricks are giant lego bricks and the nerd wizard gets incredibly pissed when you mix colors and put the yellow and blue into the brown
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Jul 20, 2017 06:56
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i didn't know listing off the imdb page for land before time 2 voice credits was a spell but here we are, wrapped in vines of mediocre trivia.
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Jul 20, 2017 06:57
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welcome, stranger. the wizard is cruel, but inept. touch his gaming mouse without washing your hands, and his thrall over your townsfolk shall be lifted.
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Jul 20, 2017 06:58
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god dang tom sawyer is a catchy song to be slaying pixel-perfect up-scaled representations of popular NES-era enemies to
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Jul 20, 2017 07:00
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i threw out the nerd wizard's summon lunchable spell and now he's starving, which according to him, results in a -6 to all constitution rolls.
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Jul 20, 2017 07:03
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i canceled the nerd wizard's crunchyroll premium account and the souls of a million trapped Magical Girls exploded from his withered nerd husk
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Jul 20, 2017 14:00
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After busting through the center chamber to rescue the princess. "Your highness! I've come. Did that bastard hurt you?" "No he was just nice. Like a brother really." From the shadows a wizard weeps Ride The Gravitron fucked around with this message at 15:27 on Jul 20, 2017 |
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Jul 20, 2017 15:24
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Entire Thread posted:
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Jul 20, 2017 16:04
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*hands a cup of water to bacalou as he runs by* |
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Jul 20, 2017 16:13
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yes I could  cast a better-vision spell, though it's not called that, but it would be a pitiful waste of my powers and mana... plus the optician said these frames look really nice on me, and she was pretty
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Jul 20, 2017 16:16
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alnilam posted:*hands a cup of water to bacalou as he runs by*
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Jul 20, 2017 16:30
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if u wish to leave my realm u must best me... in magic *whips out deck* ---------------- |
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Jul 20, 2017 16:33
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AverySpecialfriend posted:if u wish to leave my realm u must best me... in magic |
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Jul 20, 2017 16:56
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Jul 20, 2017 17:23
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bacalou posted:help he's summoning a 108 page reddit thread comparing the prices of disposable razors lol ---------------- |
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Jul 20, 2017 19:32
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"you can never kill me, for I've bound my essence to phylacteries that are carefully hidden in--" he is interrupted by death as i sweep all his Funko Pop figurines off his Ikea desk and into the garbage
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Jul 20, 2017 21:11
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| # ? Apr 19, 2024 22:19 |
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You need 87 Firemaking to burn down this barricade. 100 Magic to save the Wizard. |
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Jul 20, 2017 22:26
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