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aters but you aren't watching it because it isn't ironic enough probably. Valerian City of a Thousand Planets is a movie that is chill and good.
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Jul 24, 2017 04:54
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It flopped badly.
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Jul 24, 2017 05:06
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It was pretty but BOY HOWDY the script was bad. It was erratic and bizzare and I hate the main guy.
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Jul 24, 2017 05:35
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The main storyline was serviceable and the design work was great, but goddamn any scene that actually required the two leads to interact was painful to watch. I don't know whose idea was it to introduce Valerian as That Guy at the workplace who hits on everyone, and then we're supposed to believe that they're in love and seriously considering marriage like, 5 minutes after a creepy as hell conversation? Bubbles had more backstory, had a more believable character arc and was more likeable than the leads. I'm also not sure why they introduce all these different races on Alpha but then didn't use any of them except as background flavor. Like, why couldn't that market scene have involved Alpha?
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Jul 24, 2017 06:21
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GrandpaPants posted:I don't know whose idea was it to introduce Valerian as That Guy at the workplace who hits on everyone
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Jul 24, 2017 07:09
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I heard it was awful
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Jul 24, 2017 07:31
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how did laureline not shoot him first day on the job
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Jul 24, 2017 08:29
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What's wrong with Dane's voice in this one?
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Jul 24, 2017 08:40
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CelticPredator posted:What's wrong with Dane's voice in this one? He sounds like a whiny PUA. It's seriously grating.
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Jul 24, 2017 09:18
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GrandpaPants posted:The main storyline was serviceable and the design work was great, but goddamn any scene that actually required the two leads to interact was painful to watch. I don't know whose idea was it to introduce Valerian as That Guy at the workplace who hits on everyone, and then we're supposed to believe that they're in love and seriously considering marriage like, 5 minutes after a creepy as hell conversation? I like all these complaints about the movie being a faithful adaptation. BravestOfTheLamps fucked around with this message at 09:35 on Jul 24, 2017 |
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Jul 24, 2017 09:19
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I never had high hopes for Valerian to begin with, after watching Lucy I suspected Besson pretty much lost his touch. I guess it was cute that he tried to recapture that Fifth Element charm again.
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Jul 24, 2017 09:42
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so i've never heard of this but going by this thread it looks like the source material both A) sucked and B) had some cool ideas in it, and instead of using the cool ideas the filmmakers decided to be strictly loyal to the source material and make it suck?
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Jul 24, 2017 10:00
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Gone Fission posted:so i've never heard of this but going by this thread it looks like the source material both A) sucked and B) had some cool ideas in it, and instead of using the cool ideas the filmmakers decided to be strictly loyal to the source material and make it suck? I haven't seen it myself, but all the complaints do imply that they were slavishly loyal to the comics, right down to preserving their "flaws" - flat characters, weak plots, stilted dialogue, intrusive exposition, etc. These are all part of the comics' appeal, because their real purpose is to throw beautiful art, weird sci-fi concepts, and humanistic political satire at the reader. The main characters being "unlikable" weirdos is feature, not a bug. 
BravestOfTheLamps fucked around with this message at 11:10 on Jul 24, 2017 |
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Jul 24, 2017 10:08
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It's a bad movie, but it's also worth an unironic watch because you don't get to see something like that every day.
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Jul 24, 2017 12:17
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well, that dialogue certainly is stilted, so good job... lol
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Jul 24, 2017 15:31
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the dude thinks that a woman being his chauffeur somehow constitutes matriarchy that is actually good political satire. Maybe i'll watch it
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Jul 24, 2017 15:36
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Gone Fission posted:well, that dialogue certainly is stilted, so good job... lol I'd say it's serviceable, as long as the leads aren't talking to each other. Real pretty movie though.
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Jul 24, 2017 21:50
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Gyges posted:I'd say it's serviceable, as long as the leads aren't talking to each other. Real pretty movie though. It's a couple of non-french people trying really really hard to be catty french. I thought it was sort of endearing.
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Jul 25, 2017 00:47
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Rhianna is apparently ok in this 
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Jul 25, 2017 01:22
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Gorgeous movie, horrible lead casting, a plot that is serviceable until the last ~20 minutes then takes a swan dive off a cliff in a hail of exposition that tears open Galaxy sized plot holes and characters suddenly acquiring information that they couldn't have. Seriously, I was enjoying it despite the lead being horribly miscast up until the final exposition barrage. It made me angry how hard it worked to kill itself.
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Jul 25, 2017 01:36
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The SituAsian posted:Rhianna is apparently ok in this Not just okay, genuinely good. Better than either of the lead actors.
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Jul 25, 2017 01:49
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I said it in the other thread, but it feels like Luc Besson just picked out his favorite moments from the comic and stuck them all together without actually thinking how they would fit with each other. The entire subplot that has Rhianna's character in it feels extremely extraneous. the way Bubble just randomly dies at the end of it, makes me think they didn't even want to bother to try to link it to the main plot. Its a shame because the film has legitimately great stuff in it, despite rolling my eyes when Major Tom started playing, I actually liked the opening a lot. Big Market was pretty cool too.
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Jul 25, 2017 02:50
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It's good, flawed as hell, but overall kinda clever and cute and that plus the prettiness is enough to give it a thumbs-up for me. Like the way the whole romance thing is done, seems to me like a very Euro-comic thing to do- "This is a genre trope, so just go along with it." Which can come off as laziness, and I don't think the lead has the charm to really pull it off, but the two kids do have their moments. (Honestly the weirdest thing about it is they keep talking marriage when they both look like they're just out of high school. Slow down, kids, you've got your whole lives ahead of you!)
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Jul 26, 2017 06:07
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They're both fully grown adults and not kids at all.
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Jul 26, 2017 06:13
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I dunno- if i didn't know this film was based on a comic I'd swear it was one of those YA series adaptations. Leads just look young. (In other news, I am 36.)
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Jul 26, 2017 06:20
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This movie delivered on spectacle and I feel I got my money's worth for that. However I wasn't blown away by Dane's performance as Valerian. I don't know who would have worked better because I felt Cara delivered quite well with the cattiness that Laureline demonstrates often in the comics, unfortunately it didn't always work that well with Dane. Plot was eh but I'd say on par with most other comic book movies coming out these days so I was really there for spectacle and it delivered on that front. Good movie, worth the price of admission
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Jul 26, 2017 06:30
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I did really like the scene where Cara just punches Clive Owen over and over and over. You rarely see that kind of good old-fashioned beatdown in space movies.
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Jul 26, 2017 06:31
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This movie was an hour too long.
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Jul 26, 2017 06:43
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Maxwell Lord posted:I did really like the scene where Cara just punches Clive Owen over and over and over. You rarely see that kind of good old-fashioned beatdown in space movies. It's implied she's doing it for a good several minutes while Valerian is talking to someone else. When it cut back to her was a genuinely great moment.
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Jul 26, 2017 07:31
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Maxwell Lord posted:I dunno- if i didn't know this film was based on a comic I'd swear it was one of those YA series adaptations. Leads just look young. (In other news, I am 36.) Dane is six years younger than you.
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Jul 26, 2017 12:02
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I thought Valerian and Laureline being teenagers was some weird twist for the adaptation when the first previews came out.
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Jul 26, 2017 12:53
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CelticPredator posted:Dane is six years younger than you. Kid's got a hell of a babyface, then.
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Jul 26, 2017 19:25
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Never seen a baby with bags that huge under their eyes before.
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Jul 26, 2017 19:29
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Movie was pretty but otherwise really, really bad. Weird choice by Dane to play the protagonist as a sex offender.
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Jul 26, 2017 20:11
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Nobody is talking about how they spent SO much time on the military officer who wore the ugliest jacket. It felt like five solid minutes of just staring at him talking in that horrible jacket. There was a lot of good, fun, independent scenes. The jellyfish grabbing. Rihanna's dance. The whole David Bowie intro. The monsters serving food. It's too bad everything connecting them felt so cliche.
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Jul 27, 2017 06:22
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Those uniforms were dope, are you talking about the obligatory chinese pity cast?
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Jul 27, 2017 08:08
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super fiddly nitpick: Major Valerian. Collar device: Two silver stars. Captain Neza. Collar device: One silver star. ... Sergeant Laureline. Collar device: One silver star. I know that's a weird thing to lose immersion over but...
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Jul 27, 2017 08:17
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I think calling it a 60s comic is kind of weird since the last volume came out in 2010. Like, you wouldn't call Spider-Man a 60s comic. Also only the first three out of the 20+ books were even originally serialized in the 60s.
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Jul 27, 2017 09:01
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Veib posted:I think calling it a 60s comic is kind of weird since the last volume came out in 2010. Like, you wouldn't call Spider-Man a 60s comic. Also only the first three out of the 20+ books were even originally serialized in the 60s. Also the main book it seems to be based on, Ambassador of the Shadows, was first published in 1975.
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Jul 27, 2017 09:53
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I watched the fifth element on the heels of this. Everybody saying that this is a worse movie than that is wearing multiple layers of rose-tinted nostalgia goggles. (5E still owned bones)
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Jul 27, 2017 14:54
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