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Be smart all, dont be one of the people thrown through a windscreen I will fly to hospital this year. Booze and cars do not mix!
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Dec 15, 2017 21:45
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Reminder: you can be the dude who has half a light beer and ducks out of the Christmas party before the shitshow begins, or you can be the guy who stays for the shitshow. If you are the latter guy, you should not drive.
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Dec 15, 2017 22:16
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If you're contemplating cheating on your spouse at the office Christmas party, it's best to find out if he/she follows your internet posts before you put anything online.
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Dec 15, 2017 22:20
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I don't plan on swimming, so I'll be fine.
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Dec 16, 2017 02:22
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UP THE BUM NO BABY posted:If you're contemplating cheating on your spouse at the office Christmas party, it's best to find out if he/she follows your internet posts before you put anything online. 
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Dec 16, 2017 03:20
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Throwing up into a regulator is not as cool as it sounds
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Dec 16, 2017 03:42
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Ambihelical Hexnut posted:Throwing up into a regulator is not as cool as it sounds Last time I got sick on a dive, I ripped the regulator out of my mouth and just puked directly into the ocean. I was followed by a school of fish the rest of the dive.
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Dec 16, 2017 04:12
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UP THE BUM NO BABY posted:If you're contemplating cheating on your spouse at the office Christmas party, it's best to find out if he/she follows your internet posts before you put anything online. but his spouse ended up wearing his skin as a face mask and posting here and is arguably a better poster so it was a net gain for us
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Dec 17, 2017 20:27
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Well, I'm gonna drive and if I see one of your bullshit "safety checkpoints" I'm just gonna drive through a field to get around you and there's nothing you can do about it because I know my rights  and then I'm gonna go swimming when I get home
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Dec 19, 2017 16:20
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tjZ7Ue4U1fw There is a really good one this year, it has people struggling on top of the water then going down and coming up as a different race and sex each time. Tagline is 'The ocean does not discriminate' Spacman fucked around with this message at 16:33 on Dec 19, 2017 |
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Dec 19, 2017 16:27
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Reign Of Pain posted:Well, I'm gonna drive and if I see one of your bullshit "safety checkpoints" I'm just gonna drive through a field to get around you and there's nothing you can do about it because I know my rights Just hold up a piece of paper like was all the rage a few years ago as you casually coast by the sobriety checkpoint.
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Dec 19, 2017 18:02
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Don't drink and drive, don't beat your wife, don't participate in racially-motivated beatdowns at the bar, don't threaten civilians with a full-sized flare you stole during an exercise, don't do whippets in the barracks, and don't rob a bank, but if you do, take both the license plates off first. And don't smoke weed, you're pissing in a cup once you get back from block leave. Have a good Christmas, I'm flying to Panama to smash out Panamanian chicks for two weeks.
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Dec 19, 2017 18:22
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"Keep the menorah away from curtains when it's lit or you'll burn your house down. Don't overload outlets with Christmas lights or you'll burn your house down. Don't put candles on the tree or you'll burn your house down. If you give your son a mogwai as a gift, make sure you don't get it wet and don't feed it after midnight." Excerpt from my safety briefing this year.
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Dec 19, 2017 22:15
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bullshit if that little fucker wants to eat after midnight i'll feed it and then toss it in my neighbor's garage
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Dec 21, 2017 05:51
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Smiling Jack posted:but his spouse ended up wearing his skin as a face mask and posting here and is arguably a better poster so it was a net gain for us Knew you were my dude :bigtran:
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Dec 21, 2017 14:59
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ONE oval office WOLF PACK posted:Knew you were my dude :bigtran: who the gently caress are you I'm calling for a blanket ban on name changes
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Dec 21, 2017 16:51
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Smiling Jack posted:who the gently caress are you Beanie bro.
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Dec 21, 2017 16:56
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lol I asked for my old name back in the holiday amnesty thread but idk if that’s happening 🤷🏻♂️
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Dec 21, 2017 18:02
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It'll happen in January I think, otherwise secret satan would be confusing
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Dec 21, 2017 19:59
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ONE oval office WOLF PACK posted:lol I asked for my old name back in the holiday amnesty thread but idk if that’s happening 🤷🏻♂️
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Dec 23, 2017 00:31
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 23:57 |
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Remember, trade your drink tickets for favors, and if the company pays for the hotel room, get a nice view and a bottle of Bulleit.
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Dec 23, 2017 00:34
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